Falling for Grace (19 page)

Gracie shook her head. “Of course not. You
know I don’t mind. We can leave the doors ajar and I can hear her
if she needs me.”

Izzie jumped up on her knees. “Can I stay
with Gracie tonight, Daddy? She has an extra room.”

Carson shook his head. “Izzie, you don’t
invite yourself.”

“
She won’t
care.”

“
But that’s not the point,
Iz. Besides, you and I have to get up very early in the morning to
go to Louisville. Gracie might not want to get up that early. I
think you should just stay in your bed tonight, and perhaps, if you
are invited, we can consider that for another time.”

Ever the negotiator, Gracie was reminded of
Carson’s former law profession. She supposed those skills might
have some merit in parenting, too.

“
But Dad...”

“
Iz.”

The child frowned, but knew her father’s
warning face. “Okay.”

He motioned for her and in the next instant
she flew from the bed and into her father’s arms. Gracie watched as
a disturbed Claire arched her back, then stretched, they yawned and
curled herself into the dent on the bed where Izzie had been
sitting. Bandit was now nipping at Carson’s ankles.

“
Give me a
kiss.”

She did and he sat her back on the bed.
Turning to Gracie, he said, “You’re sure you don’t mind?”

“
Not at all.
Anytime.”

Carson hesitantly grinned, then stepped
toward the door. “I’ll check with you later, Gracie. Night,
Munchkin. Bandit! Quick nipping at my heels!”

Laughing, Gracie watching him leave,
suddenly wondering why things between them had gotten so much
easier the past few days.

Or had they?

Chapter Twelve

Gracie woke with a start.

Groggy, she turned her head to the side and
listened. She’d heard something, but what? Unsure, she sat quietly
in her chair, fished the remote control out of her lap, and turned
off the television. She must have fallen asleep while watching the
news.

Maybe it was the television. Maybe that’s
what she’d heard. Or the cat.

“
Mom-my!”

It wasn’t the cat.

The child’s scream echoed through the
stairwell and into Gracie’s living room. Like a gunshot, she bolted
from her chair and raced from her apartment and into the one next
door, scrambling through the rooms until she reached Izzie.

The child was crying and moaning. Curled
into a ball and clutching her wadded up blanket close to her heart,
Izzie moved from side to side, whimpering. “Mommy,” she said again,
then she took some shallow breaths and sobbed.

Gracie’s heart broke into pieces. She rushed
to Izzie and gathered her close.

“
Izzie,” she whispered.
“It’s okay. I’m here.” She held the child close and rocked her.
“It’s Gracie. Wake up honey, you’re having a bad dream.”

Besides breaking, her heart went out to the
child. Her cries for her mommy were nearly Gracie’s undoing, and
soon she found tears in her own eyes. She knew then, at that
moment, that should she ever become a mommy, that nothing on this
planet would keep her from seeing to her child’s every need or from
being with her child when she needed her.

How Izzie’s mother could walk away from her
only child for her career, she would never understand. As much as
Gracie loved ballet, she’d always known that when her first child
came along, her career would go on the back burner.

For that matter, she couldn’t understand how
Izzie’s mother could walk out on Carson, either. She’d left her
entire family. The thought was not plausible. All Gracie had ever
wanted in her life, besides ballet, was a husband and a family. It
was snatched away from her before she’d ever gotten it. Carson’s
wife had had everything, and had casually walked away.

She’d never understand it.

“
Gracie?” the child’s
weakened voice came to her.

“
Yes, honey. I’m
here.”

“
Hold me
tighter.”

“
I am Munchkin.” Gracie
stroked damp stray hairs from Izzie’s temple. She’d never before
used Carson’s nickname for Izzie but for some reason, it felt
right. And maybe Izzie needed that familiarity right
now.

“
You okay?” she whispered
a few moments later.

The girl nodded and snuggled closer. Gracie
brought the blanket around them both and settled back against the
pillows with her. “Bad dream,” Izzie said then.

“
I’m sorry,” Gracie
whispered. “I hope I made it go away.”

Izzie was quiet for a while. Her face was
still in Gracie’s chest, so she couldn’t tell if the child was
fully awake or not. After a minute, she nodded against her.

“
It was my mommy. She kept
running away.”

Gracie winced. She was beginning to despise
Izzie’s mommy. “Maybe she didn’t see you.”

“
She saw me. She kept
running...and I kept running...I couldn’t catch her...and then she
disappeared.”

Gracie held her tighter.

How symbolic, she thought.

“
I wish you were my
mommy,” Izzie said sleepily and yawned. “You wouldn’t run away,
would you?”

Gracie couldn’t think of a response. There
was no way she could ever go there, ever think anything remotely
close to that or encourage the child to think that that could
happen. Last thing she needed was Izzie thinking that the
possibility that she could become her mommy, could exist.

Because it couldn’t.

“
How about if I be your
best friend,” she offered quietly. “Best friends don’t go
away.”

Izzie must have been thinking about that.
“Joey Brockman is my best friend.”

Gracie smiled. “How about if I be your best
girl friend.”

She must have thought a little longer.
“Okay,” she finally said.

Gracie snuggled further beneath the covers
with Izzie. They were quiet for some time. Izzie’s breathing became
slow and even and Gracie wondered if she’d gone back to sleep. She
held her, thinking again about all that Izzie’s mother was missing
out on.

“
My mother is a famous
actress, you know.”

Gracie had thought Izzie was asleep. “She
is?”

“
Yes. And someday she’ll
come visit and take me to California where they make the
movies.”

“
She will?” It was hard
for Gracie to follow Izzie’s irrational thinking. But then again,
she was a child, and had woke from a restless sleep.

“
Ummmhmmmm...”

“
So you’d like to do
that?”

Izzie nodded against her chest.
“Uh-huh.”

“
Bet your daddy would miss
you.”

Izzie sighed. “Oh, he’d come, too. Someday,
my daddy and my mommy will get married again.”

This time Gracie sighed. “Oh.” Try as she
might, reminding herself that Izzie was practically talking in her
sleep, Gracie still couldn’t stop the pang that pierced her stomach
at that statement.

“
Ummhmmm...”

“
Really?”

“
Yeah. My daddy told
me...”

Izzie relaxed and very quickly, fell back to
sleep. With the child wrapped up in her arms like a protective
cocoon, Gracie was afraid to move, fearful she’d wake her again.
She decided to stay put, her mind drifting over their conversation.
Not wanting to think too much about Izzie’s mommy and daddy getting
back together. Blessedly, all too quickly, she found herself
drifting into sleep, the conversation just a myriad of thoughts
meandering through her mind.

* * * *

When Carson stepped inside Izzie’s bedroom
sometime later that evening, the scene which met him was not the
one he’d expected. He’d expected to find a sleeping Izzie, sheets
and covers all disarray, her head at the foot of the bed and her
feet on her pillows, with Bandit tucked up under her chin asleep.
That was Izzie’s normal sleeping position. Most nights he’d gently
turn her around and tuck her in, only to find by morning that she’d
somehow twisted herself back to the foot of the bed again.

But tonight—tonight he met with something
entirely different. From out of nowhere, a huge lump formed in his
throat and he was having a helluva time swallowing.

Gracie was there.

Tucked in beside of Izzie, their heads
actually pillowed against the headboard, the sheets and covers
neatly pulled up around them, Gracie slept with Izzie cradled in
her arms. Izzie’s head rested on Gracie’s shoulder. The fingers of
Gracie’s right hand were curled loosely against his daughter’s
cheek as though she’d fallen asleep brushing wayward curls away
from her face. Bandit and Claire slept wrapped around each other
next to Izzie.

He had to chuckle at that.

Carson hated to wake any of them. It was
after two a.m. and he was tired, too. His night had been a long
one. The crowd downstairs had been loud, along with the music and
the pinging of the arcade games. He had half a notion to shove the
animals aside and curl up next to his daughter and the woman next
door who had somehow invaded every single one of his thoughts the
past few days.

He was sorely tempted.

But he wouldn’t do it.

Still, he didn’t want to leave. Careful not
to wake them, he sat on the edge of the bed. His thigh grazed
Gracie’s. The blanket covered her, but he could feel the sensation
of her touch through the blanket and the warmth of her flesh.

He wanted to be next to her. That primal
urge was boiling up from somewhere deep inside him and no matter
how much he told himself that he didn’t want a relationship, that
he didn’t need a woman in his life, the urge to share something
with Gracie was almost more than he could fathom at the moment.

Watching her with Izzie this past weekend
had been pleasant. Very pleasant. It was almost healing. At times,
it reminded him of what he’d once had with Marci. It made him long
for that again. But more than that, he reminded him of what he’d
always wanted. Family.

But the scene before him was becoming too
cozy, perhaps. Too much for Izzie to handle. Maybe too much for him
to handle.

Although he liked Izzie spending time with
Gracie, he was almost afraid she was spending too much time with
their neighbor. What would happen if, for some reason, Gracie
didn’t want to be in Izzie’s life any longer?

He frowned at the thought. For multiple
reasons. Some he didn’t even want to explore or acknowledge.

Gracie sighed and he lifted his gaze to
watch the even rise and fall of her chest. She was wearing the same
nightshirt from some time back, he noticed. The one when Izzie had
fallen down the stairs. Problem was, he also remembered exactly
what she looked like with that nightshirt on, even though he could
only see a small glimpse of it peeking out from beneath the
covers.

Closing his eyes, he recalled the image
before him as she’d stood on the steps that day. Painted toenails,
long legs, and all.

He sighed and opened his eyes again.

Izzie whimpered and rolled away from Gracie.
Her arms slack now, Gracie didn’t hamper the child’s movement.
Izzie rolled closer to the animals. Bandit snorted and turned belly
up; Claire remained still, an unmovable lump of softly snoring
sleeping cat flesh.

Leaning over Gracie, Carson carefully
attempted to reposition the covers over his daughter. She was out
like a light. He tucked and moved closer to kiss her lightly on the
cheek. Izzie whimpered again and he lingered there a second,
watching his daughter’s slumber.

Slowly, he moved back to the side of the
bed. A quick remembrance of several nights earlier raced through
his mind as he continued to bring the covers up around Gracie. No
use in her getting cold in the night either, he reasoned.

But he lingered there, as he’d done once
before, so tempted to reach out and smooth babyfine hairs away from
her temples, liked she’d done for his daughter some time earlier.
Like he’d done a few nights ago for her.

Her breathing was even and shallow, her lips
slightly parted. Suddenly, Carson’s thoughts were no longer on
smoothing the hair away from her face, but on the softness of
Gracie’s lips and how they might feel, once again, pressed against
his.

And in the next instant, he found out.

* * * *

Gracie woke to a gentle wheezing in her
ear.

Forcing one eye-lid open, she squinted as
the morning sun shining through her window was filtered through
something fuzzy and lumpy to her right.

Wait a minute, she thought. I don’t get the
morning sun in my bedroom window.

Rising up on one elbow, she opened the other
eye and glanced around her.

This wasn’t her room. This was Izzie’s
room.

Ah...she remembered now. The nightmare.

But Izzie wasn’t still in bed with her. She
was no where to be found. Claire, however, was still sleeping
soundly beside her. Gracie was surprised that cat hadn’t woke her
long ago wanting to be fed. Claire must have been the something
fuzzy blocking some of the morning sun from her face a minute
earlier. The wheezing something fuzzy.

Now how in the world did she end up sleeping
here all night?

Falling back on a pillow, Gracie tried to
recall the scene from the night before.

Izzie had screamed. She’d groggily rushed
next door to see what was the matter. The child had had a nightmare
involving her mother. And Gracie had fallen asleep wondering what
kind of mother would leave a child like Izzie.

Yes, she did vaguely remember falling asleep
in Izzie’s bed.

But then, there was something else, wasn’t
there?

She closed her eyes, trying to recall.