Falling Fast (15 page)

Alexa wanted to grab Shelby by the throat to shake her. Alexa wished she could give Brandon the benefit of the doubt by assuming that he had kept his promise and not fooled around with Shelby, but she was still confused as to why he had picked Shelby at the last two heart ceremonies. Plus, Alexa couldn’t overlook Shelby’s confidence, as if she and Brandon had done something to clinch her victory.

Burning up just thinking about Brandon kissing Shelby, she barely managed to keep her hands clenched on her lap and her mouth sealed shut.

Alexa couldn’t wait for the day when she finally wrote the damn cover story and could get on with her life. One day she’d be able to forget Brandon’s tender kisses, and his vows to be with her and only her during the show.

At least, she consoled herself, she hadn’t been fool enough to believe him, thanks to so many years of watching men pledge their undying love to Sophie and Mel and then immediately turn around and sleep with the next hot young thing that crossed their path.

“I’m sick of pretending to be someone I’m not,” she declared as she slammed the door of her closet shut. The limo was coming to pick her up to take her to Brandon’s mother’s house in thirty minutes, but this time she wasn’t going to dress up like a perfect little wife-to-be.

She decided she was going to meet Brandon’s mother dressed as the Alexa she used to be.
The Alexa I still am,
she reminded herself. She pulled her suitcase out from under the bed and rummaged through it until she found her rattiest pair of jeans and the faded “I am woman, hear me ROAR” t-shirt she sometimes slept in. She threw them on over her lacy underwear, which she couldn’t be bothered to change, then slipped her feet into her mismatched tennis shoes. She pulled her hair back into an untidy ponytail and declared herself ready.

Standing in front of the full-length mirror, taking in her old, ratty clothes and unkempt hair, she felt a pang of longing for the beautiful woman who had been staring back at her these past two weeks. She was shocked to realize that she had gotten used to that woman. She maybe even liked her a little

“Don’t be ridiculous,” she warned herself sternly. “You look just like you always did.”

Tonight when she stepped out of the limo looking like something the cat dragged in, Brandon would show his true colors by hightailing it away from her and straight towards Brigit.

Alexa got light-headed and gripped the doorway for support. Thank god she had only had two hamburgers for lunch. Just thinking about Brandon marrying anyone else was enough to make her to almost lose the contents of her stomach.

Again.

* * *

Brandon’s heart was pounding hard as he waited on his mother’s front porch for Alexa to arrive. Every time he saw Alexa his heart did the cha-cha. He broke out in a grin, more than happy to admit how much he loved the crazy way she made him feel.

Again and again he had replayed their lovemaking in his mind. Brandon was no stranger to good sex, but after being with Alexa, his memories of other women had gone up in smoke, reduced to mere ashes.

He felt as if he’d never really touched a woman until he caressed Alexa’s silky skin.

He’d never known what a kiss was until his lips had possessed her sweetness. But the cherry on top of the sundae was how sinfully, how perfectly their bodies fit together.

But in the back of his mind he was still worried about Jared. He knew he was going to have to ask her about him tonight.

As soon as he walked through the door tonight, his mother, Elaine, had said, “Well, well, well. Don’t you look like a man in love?”

Brandon had smiled and given her a hug. He wished he could fill her in on everything—on how he and Alexa had met on the street before the show, that she was the woman he thought had gotten away, that he was going to marry her on July 1st – but he had to comply with the legal agreement he had signed. Brandon was strictly prohibited from giving away his decision to friends or family until the show went live on July 1st, lest something leaked out to the press, and TV viewer ship went down for the big finale.

“Maybe,” he’d said with a twinkle in his eyes, unable to say anything more, wishing he was more sure about the direction of Alexa’s feelings.

Accepting his reticence, Elaine stirred her famous spaghetti sauce. “I’m going to be meeting Alexa tonight, isn’t that right?”

Brandon’s eyes lit up. “I think you’re really going to like her.”

Elaine smiled. “From what I’ve seen so far on TV, she seems like a breath of fresh air.

She certainly says some very inventive and unexpected things. And what woman wouldn’t want to be able to wear such incredible dresses?” his mom said. “Although, I think those days passed me by a decade or two ago.”

“Nonsense,” he said, kissing her on the cheek.

“Go wait outside on the porch for our guest while I finish cooking,” she’d said as she swatted him away.

He had only been waiting a couple of minutes when the limo pulled up. He walked towards the sidewalk to help Alexa out of the vehicle. But before he made it to the curb, Alexa stepped out, stopping him in his tracks.

He could hardly believe his eyes. Instead of another incredible silk confection, she was wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and those same mismatched tennis shoes from the day they had met on the street in the Marina. Her hair was pulled back into a simple ponytail, and he didn’t see a lick of makeup covering her flawless skin.

Her stance was challenging as she waited for him just outside the limo door, as if one wrong word from him and she would bolt back in and tell the driver to take her away.

Brandon quickly covered the ten feet between them and swept her up into his arms, swinging her around in a circle.

“I’m so glad you’re here,” he said into her ear before setting her down.

Slightly out of breath, looking utterly surprised, Alexa said, “Aren’t you upset about my clothes?”

Brandon made a big show out of looking up and down her body. “I’ve never seen you look more beautiful than you do right now.”

Alexa abruptly pushed out of his arms and took a step back. Crossing her arms over her chest, she said, “I know I look awful, but you don’t need to make fun of me.”

Brandon slowly shook his head. “You don’t look awful, sweetheart.”

“How can you expect me to believe that? Look at me – I’m a mess! My shoes don’t even match.” She pointed to one green tennis shoe and one red one.

“Sure, I expected you to be wearing something like you’ve had on for our other dates, but you know what? When you stepped out of the limo just now, you looked like you.”

“Like me?” she squeaked, shifting from one foot to the other, looking increasingly off balance by what he was saying.

“Exactly like you.” He took one slow step towards her, as if he was approaching a skittish animal in need of comforting. He reached for her hands and held them between his. “I love that you’re so comfortable with who you are that you don’t feel like you have to dress up to impress me.”

Guilt flashed across Alexa’s face. She tried to pull her hand from Brandon’s grasp. “I need to go back and change. I can’t meet your mother looking like this. It was a big mistake.”

But Brandon refused to let her hand go. “No way. You look great. My mom’s gonna love you. Let’s go inside. But first,” he said, “I’ve got to ask you a question, about Jared.”

Alexa’s face was a picture of confusion. “What about him?”

Brandon felt like an idiot for what he was about to say, but he made himself say it anyway. “Does he have feelings for you?”

Alexa’s mouth fell open.

“Do you have feelings for him?”

He could see when understanding dawned in her eyes. Licking her lips she said, “He’s been my best friend since elementary school. And I love him.”

Brandon’s heart dropped to the floor. “You do?” he said, trying to act like his whole world hadn’t just fallen apart.

She nodded. “I do. Like a brother.”

Brandon’s relief was palpable and the cameramen even took a step back. The words “like a brother” had never sounded quite so sweet before.

* * *

Alexa could hardly believe what Brandon had said:
I love that you’re so comfortable
with who you are that you don’t feel like you have to dress up to impress me.
Alexa knew, in that instant, how badly she had misjudged him.

The love in his eyes told her he meant every word.

And when he had asked about Jared, about whether she had feelings for him, it was just another way that Brandon was proving how much he cared about her. It was as if he was afraid that he might be on the verge of losing her to another man.

The idea was so preposterous Alexa wasn’t sure if she should laugh or cry.

For that matter, her whole job and life and
this damn show
had become so strange and crazy and preposterous she wasn’t sure if she was going to laugh or cry. Right now she felt like she was on the verge of doing both at the same time.

How she longed to admit everything to him! She wanted to say,
Brandon, you’re wrong
about me. I’m not comfortable with who I am. I thought I should dress like this to teach you a
lesson. I thought I could prove how shallow you are. But I’ve never been more wrong. Can you
ever forgive me?

Alexa was torn in two. On the one hand, she could try to keep Brandon’s love by confessing everything to him, and pray that he could find it within his great, big heart to forgive her for her perfidy. Or, she could keep her covert front and write the kind of no-holds-barred cover story that would launch a spectacular journalistic career.

She felt like she had an angel on one shoulder, saying,
It’s time to do the right thing,
Alexa. It’s time to choose love over spite
, and a devil on the other, hissing,
If you give up the
story now, everything you’ve been through – the waxing, the makeover, the giggling for the
cameras – was just a big waste of our time. Are you really going to give all that up for some
guy, just like Mel and Sophie?

Alexa shook her head and took a deep breath, trying to get a grip on her rapidly fading sanity. The rational thing would be for her to make the best out of bad situation. Later, tonight when she and Brandon were alone, she would do the right thing.

All future good intentions aside, Alexa couldn’t discount how deeply she had shamed herself by showing up at his mother’s house dressed in such ratty clothes.

“Please,” she said to Brandon, just as he was about to turn the knob on the front door.

“I’d really like to go back to the house to change. It feels so disrespectful to meet your mother looking like this.” She gestured to her jeans and t-shirt to drive her point home, but all Brandon did was grin and give her a heart-pounding kiss on the lips.

“Trust me,” he said, “she’ll love you just the way you are.” And then he leaned in to whisper softly in her hair, “Just like I already do.”

Chills shot up and down Alexa’s spine. She was so mesmerized by his words, she momentarily forgot all about her less than stellar appearance as his mother opened the door and greeted her with a huge smile and warm hug.

“Alexa, it is so wonderful to meet you! Call me Elaine,” his mother said as she took Alexa by the hand and ushered her into the house.

Sitting down on a plush couch in Elaine’s colorful and whimsical living room, Alexa said, “Thank you so much for inviting me to dinner tonight. I want to apologize for my clothes-“

Elaine cut her off again with a wave of her hand. “Who cares about clothes? You look great just the way you are. I remember the first time I met Brandon’s father, I was all muddy from the garden. I felt like such a country bumpkin, but he saw right past my dirty fingernails.

That’s how I knew he was the one for me.”

Tears welled up in Alexa’s eyes. “Thank you for being so kind.”

Brandon gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. Alexa was overwhelmed by a wonderful new feeling: Unconditional love and acceptance.

It felt good. Really good. As the three of them chitchatted before dinner, Alexa let herself pretend that she was part of their family, let herself believe that she belonged.

And tried to squelch the voice in her head that said if she went through with her story, she never would.

* * *

At the end of a two-hour dinner filled with laughter, Brandon said, “No one makes spaghetti like you, Mom.”

“No kidding,” Alexa said as she rubbed her tummy for impact. “I could have kept eating all night. And the tiramisu was to die for!”

Elaine looked pleased. “I don’t think I’ve ever had such an enjoyable dinner with one of Brandon’s dates.”

Brandon raised an eyebrow. “Probably because none of them ever ate any of your amazing food, huh?”

Elaine swatted his shoulder. “No. Because I didn’t like any of them nearly as much as I like Alexa.”

Alexa’s cheeks flushed at the compliment. “Thank you so much, Elaine. That really means a lot to me. But wait until you meet Brigit tomorrow night. She’s become one of my favorite people in the whole world. You’re really going to like her.”

“Wow. That’s quite an endorsement, considering she’s your main competition for my son,” Elaine said, surprise underlying her words.

Alexa flushed deeper. The truth was, she hated any reminder of how perilous her relationship with Brandon really was. Especially since Alexa couldn’t escape her hunch that if she told Brandon about the undercover story for
ROAR
he’d be putting the engagement ring on Brigit’s finger.

Not that her new best friend didn’t deserve to be Brandon’s wife. She was sweet, pretty, and fun. It’s just that the thought of the two of them together made Alexa want to kick and scream with jealousy.

Fortunately, Brandon saved her from putting her foot even further into her mouth. “Joe left us an important note outside on the front porch, so how about Alexa and I get the table cleared and wash up the dishes?”

Elaine stood up with a smile. “I’ll take care of the dishes in the morning.” Shoeing them out the door, she said, “Now go off on your next adventure and have a wonderful time.”