Falling Angels (13 page)

It has often been the case that I am the one forced to take in hand an unfortunate situation. This age has gone soft. I see it everywhere: in the foolish fashions that pass for women's dress, in the shockingly permissive theater, in this ludicrous woman's suffrage movement we hear of. Even, dare I say it, in the conduct of our own king. I only hope his mother never got wind of his shenanigans with Mrs. Keppel.

The young lack the moral fiber of their elders, and time and again my generation is required at the last to step into the breach. I do not complain of doing so--if I can be of assistance, of course I will do whatever is required, out of Christian charity. When it happens in my own son's house, however, I feel it as a more personal attack--an ill reflection on him and on the Coleman name.

It seems that Kitty is simply blind. It was I who shone the light into the dark corners and illuminated them for her.

I had come to lunch, served on that horrid black-and-yellow-checked service--another example of the frivolities of the day. Far worse, however, was the state of their maid. After she had banged every dish onto the table and waddled out again, I sat stunned. Kitty did not meet my eye, but pushed the poached fish and new potatoes around her plate. I disapprove of lack of appetite--it is selfish behavior when there is so much hardship in the world. I would have said so but I was more concerned to address the problem of Jenny.

I tried at first to be gentle. "My dear," I said, "Jenny is not looking her best. Have you spoken to her about it?"

Kitty gave me a puzzled look. "Jenny?" she repeated vaguely.

"Your maid," I said more firmly, "is not well. Surely you can see that."

"What is wrong with her?"

"Come now, my dear, open your eyes. It is clear as day what the trouble is."

"Is it?"

I couldn't help but grow a little impatient with Kitty. In truth, I should like to have given her a good shake, as if she were a young girl like Maude. In some ways Maude is more mature than her mother. I had been disappointed that she did not join us for lunch--at times it is easier to speak to her than to Kitty. But I was told she was at her friend's. At least I was able to be more frank with Kitty than I could have if Maude had been with us.

"She has got herself into trouble. With a man," I added so that there could be no doubt.

Kitty clattered her cutlery most unbecomingly and stared at me with her dark brown eyes that had made my son into such a fool years before. She was very pale.

"She is six months gone at least," I continued, as Kitty seemed incapable of speaking. "Probably more. I always knew that girl would come to no good. I never liked her--far too insolent. You could see just by looking at her. And she sings as she works--I can't abide that in a servant. I expect the man will not marry her, and even if he does she can't possibly remain here. You don't want a married woman and mother in that position. You need a girl with no attachments."

My daughter-in-law was still staring at me with a bewildered look. It was very clear that she could not manage--I would have to take charge.

"I shall speak to her after lunch," I said. "Leave it with me."

Kitty didn't say anything for a moment. Finally she nodded.

"Now, eat your fish," I said.

She pushed it around her plate a bit more, then said she had a headache. I don't like to see such waste, but in this instance I said nothing, as she had clearly had a shock and did look rather ill. Luckily my own constitution is more robust and I finished my fish, which was very good except that the sauce was rather rich. Thank goodness for Mrs. Baker--she shall have to hold the house together for the moment until we find a replacement. I'd had my doubts about her when Kitty first hired her, but she is a good plain cook as well as a solid Christian. It does help to hire a widow--like myself she does not have great expectations of life.

Jenny came in to clear and I couldn't help but shake my head at her brazenness. How she thought she could wander about the house with such a thick waist and think no one would notice is quite astonishing. Mind you, I suppose she knows her mistress. If I had not alerted Kitty she might never have noticed until the girl held the babe crying in her arms! I saw Kitty inspect Jenny as she leaned over to gather our plates, and a look like fear crossed her face. She was most certainly not up to dismissing Jenny. I myself felt no fear, but righteous determination.

Kitty said not a word except "No coffee for me, Jenny."

"Nor hot water for me," I added. There was no point in delaying the proceedings.

The girl grunted, and as she left I thought what a blessing in disguise this was--a chance to get rid of a bad apple.

I told Kitty to go and rest, then waited a short interval before going down to the kitchen, where Mrs. Baker was wiping the table clean of flour. I do not go there often, so I suppose she had reason to look surprised. But there was more to her look than that. Mrs. Baker is no fool--she knew why I had come.

"The fish was quite good, Mrs. Baker," I said pleasantly. "Perhaps a little less butter in the sauce next time."

"Thank you, ma'am," she replied quite correctly, but managing to sound put out as well.

"Where is Jenny? I want to have a word with her."

Mrs. Baker stopped brushing the table. "She's in the scullery, ma'am."

"So you know, then."

Mrs. Baker shrugged and began brushing the table again. "Anyone with eyes to see would know."

As I turned toward the scullery, she surprised me by adding, "Let her be, ma'am. Just let her be."

"Are you telling me how this house should be run?" I asked.

She did not answer.

"There is no use in being sentimental about it, Mrs. Baker. This is for her own good."

Mrs. Baker shrugged again. I was surprised--she is normally a sensible woman. She is from a very different background than myself, of course, but at times I have thought she and I are not so different.

It did not take long. Jenny cried and ran from the room, of course, but it could have been worse. In a way the girl must have been relieved that it was out at last. She knew very well that someone would finally find her out. The waiting must have been excruciating, and I like to think I put the girl out of her misery.

My one regret is that Maude was there. I had thought she was at the Waterhouses', but as I came out of the scullery she was standing in the doorway of the larder. I had spoken to Jenny in a low voice, and I don't think Maude heard what I said, but she heard Jenny's shout, and I would have preferred it if she had not been there.

"Is Jenny ill?" she asked.

"Yes," I answered, thinking that was the best way to explain it. "She will have to leave us."

Maude looked alarmed. "Is she dying?"

"Don't be silly." It was exactly the kind of dramatic question her friend Lavinia would ask--Maude was simply parroting her. I knew that girl was a bad influence.

"But what--"

"We missed you at lunch," I interrupted. "I thought you were at your friend's."

Maude turned red. "I--I was," she stammered, "but Lavinia has a--a cough, and so I came back. I've been helping Mrs. Baker make soda bread."

She has never been a good liar. I could have exposed the lie, but I was weary from the business with Jenny, and so I left it. And if I am honest, I didn't want to know. It gave me a pang to think that my own granddaughter would rather bake bread with the cook than have lunch with me.

I had never thought Grandmother would come down to the kitchen. It was the one place where I thought I was safe, and could remain until she was gone--then I would not have to have lunch with her. Even Mummy thought I was at Lavinia's. I would have been, only Lavinia was out visiting her cousins.

As it was I almost managed to hide from Grandmother. I was putting the oats and flour and bicarb in the larder for Mrs. Baker when I heard Grandmother come into the kitchen and speak to her. I shrank back into the larder but didn't dare close the door in case she saw it move.

She passed by without looking in and went into the scullery, where she began talking to Jenny in a low voice that sent shivers down my spine. It was the voice she uses when she has something awful to say--that she has discovered you have broken a vase, or not gone to church, or done poorly in school. Jenny began to cry, and though I had a chance to close the larder door then, I didn't--I wanted to hear what they were saying. I crept closer to the open door and heard Grandmother say, "... wages until the end of the week, but you must pack your things now." Then Jenny cried out and ran from the scullery up the stairs. Grandmother came out of the scullery, and there was I standing in the doorway, my pinafore covered in flour.

I was surprised when Grandmother then told me Jenny was ill, but indeed she had grown slow and fat these days, as if she had a blockage in her stomach. Perhaps she should be taking cod liver oil. Then Grandmother said she would have to leave because of it. I thought she must be terribly ill indeed but Grandmother wouldn't say more about it.

Luckily Grandmother decided to go then, or I might have had a tedious afternoon with her all alone, as she said Mummy had gone to bed with a headache. I saw her to the door, and as she left she said I was to tell Mummy later that everything was sorted out satisfactorily. I knew better than to ask what she meant.

After she had gone I went downstairs again and asked Mrs. Baker instead. "Is Jenny going to leave us?"

There was a pause, then Mrs. Baker said, "I expect she will."

"Is she very ill, then?"

"Ill? Is that what she's calling it?"

There was a knock on the outside kitchen door. "Perhaps that's Lavinia," I said hopefully, and ran to the door.

"Don't tell her any of this," Mrs. Baker warned.

"Why not?"

Mrs. Baker sighed and shook her head. "Never mind. Tell her what you like. She'll find out soon enough."

It was Simon. He did not say hello; he never says hello. He stepped inside and looked around. "Where's our Jenny? She upstairs?"

I glanced at Mrs. Baker, who was gathering up the bowl and sieve we had used for the bread. She frowned but did not answer.

"She's ill," I said. "She may have to go away."

"She's not ill," Simon said. "She's banged up."

"Banged up--is that like knocking?" I asked uneasily. I hoped no one had hurt Jenny.

"Maude!" Mrs. Baker barked, and I jumped. She never shouted at me--only at the butcher's boy if the meat was off, or the baker, who she once accused of using sawdust in his loaves. She turned to Simon. "Is it you been teaching her this filthy language? Look at her--she doesn't even know what she's saying. Shame on you, boy!"

Simon gave me a funny look. "Sorry," he said. I nodded, though I didn't really know what he was apologizing for. In many ways he knew so little--had never been to school, could barely read, and that learned from gravestones. Yet he clearly knew about things in the world that I had no notion of.

Simon turned to Mrs. Baker. "Is there any bread?"

"It's in the oven, little beggar boy," Mrs. Baker snapped. "You'll have to wait."

Simon just looked at her. He seemed not the least bothered that she had just called him a beggar. She sighed, then set down the bowl and sieve and went to the sideboard, where she found an end of a loaf. "Go and put some butter on it," she said, handing it to him. "You know where it is."

Simon disappeared into the larder.

"Make him a cup of tea, Maude," she ordered, picking up her dishes again and heading for the scullery. "Just one sugar," she added over her shoulder.

I gave him two sugars.

Simon had spread the bread with great hunks of butter, as if it were cheese. I watched him eat it at the table, his teeth carving rectangular grooves in the butter.

"Simon," I whispered. "What does banged up mean?" It felt wicked saying the words, now that I knew they were shocking.

Simon shook his head. "Not for me to say. Best to ask your ma."

I knew I never would.

The sody bread smells good, baking in the oven. I want to wait for it, but I know I was lucky to get anything at all from Mrs. Baker. She ain't so generous with the bread as our Jenny is.

I want to see our Jenny. Maude thinks she's in her room upstairs. So when I've finished the bread I pretend to leave, but don't pull the back door closed. I wait and peek through the window till I see Maude and Mrs. B. go into the scullery together. Then I sneak back in real quiet and run up the stairs before anyone sees me.

I never been in the rest of the house. It's big, with lots of stairs that I keep stopping on 'cause there's so much to see. On the walls there's paintings and drawings of all sorts of things, buildings and people but mostly birds and flowers. Some of the birds I know from the cemetery, and some of the flowers too. They're proper drawings, with all the bits of the plant as well as the flower. I seen a book of Mr. Jackson's at the lodge with pictures like that.

The rugs on the stairs and in the hallways are mostly green, with some yellow and blue and red bits in a pattern. Each landing has a plant on it, them ones with long thin leaves what wave up and down as I go past. Our Jenny hates 'em 'cause she has to clean all the little leaves and it takes so long. "No one asked me what plants they should have," she said once. "Why don't she get one of them aspidistras with a few big leaves that are easy to wash?"

I go on up until I'm on the top landing. There are two doors up there, both closed. I have to choose, so I open one and go in. It's Maude's room. I stand and look a long time. There's so many toys and books, more than I ever seen in a room. There's a whole shelf of dolls, all different sizes, and another shelf of games--boxes full of things, puzzles and such. There's lots of shelves of books. There's a brown-and-white hobby horse with a black leather saddle that moves back and forth on rollers. There's a wood dollhouse with fancy furniture in all the rooms, miniature rugs and chairs and tables. There's pictures on the walls of Maude's room, children and dogs and cats, and something that looks like a map of the sky, with all the stars connected up with lines to make pictures like what I saw in the stars that cold night in the grave.