Faithless (Mistress & Master of Restraint) (61 page)

“It’s is rather funny in a sick
ening sort of way that I’m sitting on a naked girl’s legs telling her about her mother while trying not to cheat on my mistress with my future mistress,” Grant flippantly admits so many sins without a bit of remorse that my mind reels.

“I won’t be your mistress,” I assure him.

“Yes, you will,” Grant confidently says, grinning down at me. “If I took my pants off right now, you’d let me in and cum for me.”

My body contacts so forcefully that I gasp in shock.
My belly repeatedly clenches like a fist, releasing moisture in a wash from the apex of my thighs. My eyes roll back and my fingers dig into Grant’s bedding. I can almost feel him sliding like silk inside me. His words impact me and create a whirlwind of imagery that I experience in real time. It’s been months since I’ve had sex and even longer since I enjoyed it. Hell, I only enjoyed the first two times.

“I… I’m… broken,” I admit in shame. I hide my face in the blanket, not wanting Grant to see me. I can’t be with him either
, because I’d have to fake it and he deserves better.

“You’re not broken,” Grant purrs. “You’re confused, hurt, and having sex with the wrong guys.” He leans over my back and presses his lips to my ear. “I bet you exploded for Wil and I know you did for Ezra. I can still hear your mews of pleasure. You’ve just been having sex wrong. You did it right with Ezra.”

My body shakes beneath him. I press my face into the mattress and fight the urge to cry. “I… I’ve had sex three hundred and thirty seven times without an orgasm,” I reluctantly admit the truth I promised I’d never speak.

“Mmm… You’ll see,” Grant purrs
.

A strange sounding grunt is ripped from my mouth when Grant’s fingers bite into the flesh of my ass. He firmly squeezes and releases, humming to himself the entire time. I squirm on the mattress because his movement
s are affecting other areas. Every time he pulls my ass cheeks apart it radiates up my spine and straight down to my pussy. I mew for him.

“You’re pu
ssy is contracting,” Grant purrs and I gap in shock. “You’ll cum for me if I keep doing this. I’m not even touching you sexually, but you will orgasm for me. That is the difference,” he assures me.

Grant’s groan makes my eyes roll back and my fingers clench on the sheets.
I can feel his eyes lingering on me. He’s no longer sitting on my legs, but between them. My legs are wrenched open as far as they will go as he kneads my ass and thighs.

“
Mmm… your pussy is weeping for me,” Grant growls deep from his chest. “This is sensual. It’s what a boy doesn’t know because they haven’t learned it yet. You’ve had sex with virgin after virgin after virgin. Sensual is about the buildup. One thrust and you’d fracture for me,” Grant arrogantly says causing me to hiss.

“This… this isn’t cheating?” I incredulously gasp
, trying to pull back from the abyss.

Grant ignores my comment and keeps talking while driving me higher. “
What made the sex with Wil great is that you’re in love with the fuck. Sex with Ezra was thrilling because it was wrong and you feel a connection to him- a bond through the game. Sex with Cortez made you feel guilty because you and Ez were lying to him. You don’t respect Cort because he acts like a teenage boy. Do you know why?”

“No,” I moan, even though I’m sure it was rhetorical.

“Cortez acts like a teenage boy because he is one. At his age, I would have fucked a wall if it felt good. But you aren’t the average teenage girl… you need a man,” Grant growls. “Particularly a bad man- a very bad man.”

“Ugh!” I grunt when I’m abruptly flipped over with my legs resting on Grant’s shoulders. I gaze up at him with wide eye
s as I pant out puffs of exhilaration. I feel exposed and it makes me feel alive in a way I’ve never experienced before. Grant plays me like a fine-tuned instrument that he’s the only one who knows how to play.

Grant stares me in the eyes and mouths,
and I’m going to be a very, very bad man
.

My eyes slip closed as a full-bodied shudder rolls over me. My fingers turn to claws and my toes curl. Sounds are spilling
from my lips and I don’t know where they are coming from.

“I’m proving that sex feels good and should continue to make you feel g
ood after the orgasm. It should empower you, not stifle you. No guilt. No shame. No regret,” Grant chants again. “I’d love to be inside you right now,” Grant growls and my body goes insane- clenching so deep that it aches.

“Look at that beautiful pussy,” Grant seductively purrs and it sounds distant, like a dream. His breath skates over my sensitive flesh and I whimper in need.

“You hide your body in shame. You tattooed and pierced yourself to be an individual and now you regret it. No regrets, Syn,” Grant demands. “No regrets. Own your body,” he chants and I want to be his believer.

“You have no clue how gorgeous you look spread out before me like a fresh bounty. Hot, young, and ripe,” Grant
lustily growls from deep within his chest. “I dream of that tongue ring of yours rimming the head of my cock. Do you like oral sex, Syn?”

“Yes,” I whimper, thighs quivering on Grant’s shoulders.

“The first time I taste you, it will be mutual. My cock will fill your mouth, that tongue ring driving me crazy while my face is buried between your thighs. I will lick and suck at the moisture you release for me. I will pour hot down your throat as your body erupts for me. Does that sound nice, Syn?”

“Yes,” I whimper again, feeling everything he describes. My body starts undulating in waves, trying to get closer to Grant’s mouth. He’s so close that I can feel the heat radiate from between his lips. For the first time ever, I don’t call my body a slut for being hungry.

“Better than nice,” Grant softly agrees, relentlessly teasing me. “I love the taste of pussy,” he purrs. “I love getting my face in there, tongue shoved deep inside, lapping up all that beautiful cream. Every single time I’ve ate pussy, I’ve spontaneously combusted- that’s how much I love it. Would you like me to lick your pretty pussy, Syn?”

“Yes,” I moan.

“Say it,” Grant demands.

“I want you to lick on me,” I
shamelessly beg.

“Too bad,” he taunts
, and I whimper in disappointment. “You’ll have to wait for that. Your pussy is still too young for me,” Grant sounds disappointed, too. “I’ll just have to look at it and dream of how sweet it tastes, of how your pussy will contract around my tongue as I fuck you with it. I can’t wait to wrap my lips around the incredibly sexy ring above your clit and suckle,” he growls.

“Grant
, you’re gonna to make me cum,” I hiss. 

“I think you’re trying to kill me,” Grant says in amusement. “I had no idea you were hiding four more piercings underneath your
veil of black clothing. The tattoos are sexy as fuck, but my God- your nipples, belly button, and clit are pierced. Holy shit, Syn,” Grant sounds pained and it flips a switch in my mind.

I arch my back as a moan rolls along my throat to pour out my parted lips. I climax
after never having a single touch laid upon my flesh. I cum from the words Grant speaks and the vision he creates within my mind. I feel every action he says, I feel it as if it’s real and larger than life.

I fall back to the mattress, replete and relaxed, and without a shred of guilt. But one thought assaults me as Grant
affectionately curls around my blissed-out body.

“Do you love Regina?” I whisper so softly I fear Grant can’t hear me
or that he can.

After several heartbeats of hesitation, Grant says, “I think so… I know I’m a man. I’m twenty-five, but I can tell you that when you’re my age, you will still feel lost and confused. I know you probably think Stanton is old, but he
and I are just as young in life as you are. So… I don’t know if I love Regina. I think that my guilt clouds my feelings or maybe it deepens them. But either way, I have no idea how I feel.”

“You’re confusing me,” I murmur against his shoulder.

“I’m confusing me,” he says with a humorless laugh. “I guess the real answer is in the fact that I can’t answer. Or maybe the real answer is that I just had sex with you- verbal or not- that was sex. I’m still stuck in the mindset where you love someone to the point that you’d be physically sick if you thought of touching another. But that is bullshit because people still intrigue me. Regina or no Regina- I still get turned on by other people. I still feel a deep connection.”

“I get that,” I say, but I do and I don’t get it.

“You should,” Grant murmurs. “You’re in love with someone who is screwing your mom,” he says it softly but it still stings. “Your wince is telling,” he chuckles. “You just had sex with me and you loved it… and you’re already hoping for a next time, and none of that has anything to do with Wil or Regina… now ask me if I care for her or respect her or want her to be happy…  because that is different. I want Regina to be happy to the point that I am willing to give her up to give her that happiness… is that love?” Grant muses. “I believe so. It’s what kept me from making love with you just now, because that would be cheating. It wasn’t your age or Stanton that kept me from entering you- it was my loyalty to Regina. I won’t sexually touch you until…” he chokes up and it kills me.

I roll over and hug Grant with all my stre
ngth as he cries. He was lost and he didn’t know if he could love Regina. The pain he just felt at the thought of giving her up made him found, made him realize that he loves her.

“I don’t deserve her,” he sobs. “She doesn’t know the real me. She won’t like the real me.”

“No regrets,” I whisper in Grant’s ear.

~Chapter Fifty~

Three hours later, after Grant and I fell asleep from being emotionally exhausted. Which Stanton saw with his chocolate browns after he picked the lock to Grant’s bedroom door and creepily stared at us while we slept… which I was awakened from when my ass was slapped so hard I’ll be screaming for days to come. Stanton wouldn’t believe that Grant and I didn’t have sex after finding us in what he called a ‘post-coital embrace’. Three hours and I’m still listening to Stanton drone on with his famous lectures.

The humiliating
difference of this lecture versus all the other lectures is that Gunner has a front row seat to the show. We’re on the roof. It’s a beautiful, warm night with stars twinkling overhead… and Stanton’s words aren’t exactly melodious with the car alarms, gun fire, and sirens. The thump of bass from Ridin’ High is in time with the pulse of the vein in Stanton’s forehead.

“We didn’t have sex,” I say for the thousandth time. “Grant didn’t even take his clothing off.”

“From my experience, that isn’t necessary,” Stanton growls.

It kills me to choke on the sarcastic remark that threatens to spill
. I want to say
from what I’ve heard, that wouldn’t be much experience
.

“Did you use protection? You’re not on birth control. You’re
not ready for a baby. Plus the elders would hurt you for getting knocked up by anyone other than Ezra. Think of how humiliated Ezra would be? I’m not raising Grant’s kid!”

So many awesome comebac
ks flow through my mind, but what I really say is, “Stanton, stop! For the love of all that is holy, just listen to someone other than yourself for once,” I shout, not able to listen to his disappointment a moment longer.

Stanton glares at me as Gunner erupts in laugher. “I’m with Syn- fucking stop, please,” he begs. “I can’t take it anymore and I didn’t even get to get off.
You’re slowly torturing us. Is this how you get off, bro? Do you get hard every time you bitch at someone?”

I use Stanton’s momentary stunned silence of being assaulted by a male and female version of the same person to forge on. “Grant and I didn’t have sex- clothed or otherwise. He didn’t sexually touch me.”

Two identical looks of skepticism meet my admission so I keep on talking without thinking. “
But since you seem to love to know every fart I take, here are the details. I got naked. Grant massaged my neck, shoulders, back, and ass- and it felt fabulous, arousing and relaxing. He talked the whole time about my negative thoughts on sex. I didn’t even have to tell him how I felt, he just understood. Then he flipped me over and talked dirty at me while longingly staring at my girly bits like a starving man at a buffet. He has the will of a saint. If Grant would’ve let me, I’d have fucked him blind in a heartbeat. Grant is so impressive with his mouth,” I tease with a snort, “that I had the first orgasm I’ve had in three hundred and thirty-seven times of sex… with words alone…and he never touched me or himself. Hallelujah, Grant is a miracle worker! Praise thee, Jesus,” I add on just to infuriate Stanton.

Stanton looks at me is shock, like he doesn’t believe that I just said what I said and maybe I’m lying.
He always assumes I’m lying. Gunner is breathing hard and flushed. Curiosity has my eyes flicking to Gunner’s lap, and shamefully, to Stanton’s lap. The brothers are impressively affected by my story, so I verbally throw some cold water on them.