Faithful (36 page)

“Carson told me everything right after you called today. I wasn’t going to miss this chance to be with you, and … and I want to meet your mother. If she wants to, that is.”

“She’ll want to meet you.”

“Carson didn’t tip you off that I was coming?”

“No. Maybe he didn’t want to say anything in case you decided to turn around and drive back home. I’m not crazy about the idea of you driving all this way and trying to find your way around Brooklyn.”

“I wasn’t going to change my mind. I had no doubts about what I was doing. I wasn’t sure how you’d react, though.”

“I’m very glad you’re here. Everything just got a little bit better. Where’s your bag?”

“I didn’t bring anything.”

Cooper looks at me questioningly. “You’re driving back tonight?”

“I’m not sure what I’m doing. I came to see you and your mother. I didn’t think beyond that.”

“You can borrow some of Greer’s stuff and anything of mine. My mom gets really groggy at night, so let’s try to see her now. Is that okay?”

I nod, eager and nervous as hell.

I follow Cooper up another narrow staircase. It’s quieter up here, no running, boisterous children. Fiona’s room is at the end of the hall, towards the back of the house.

The door is open as we arrive, and a young man who I assume is a nurse is checking an IV line in Fiona’s arm. Propped up in her bed, I can tell she is taller than me but shrunken. Her bald head is wrapped in a mint green scarf, and she’s wearing a bulky, hand-knit sweater over a pajamas set. She, more than any other family member, resembles Cooper. He clearly has her face. I imagine she once had long, blond hair, as well.

On the other side of the bed is a large armchair with a big, burly man with dark, cropped hair sitting and leaning over, holding Fiona’s frail hand. With her other hand, she pushes the sweater off her shoulders to adjust to the overly heated room. She’s wearing the necklace Cooper bought from me that one day back in my home studio when I became aware of my awkward crush on him.

“Mom, Dad, this is Imogene,” Cooper says, taking me by the hand and leading me into the cozy bedroom to the empty chair next to his father.

“I’m Stu,” his father says, standing to shake my hand. “This is Fi.” He looks lovingly at his former wife. From how Cooper described his family, I was expecting some shouting or at least cruel indifference. However, these are clearly people who care for one another.

“It’s wonderful to finally meet you,” Fiona says with an exhaled laugh.

“You, too.” I smile with relief.

“I’m done here, Fi,” the young man says, picking up a clipboard and taking notes. “I’m going to go eat dinner. I’ll send Greer or Cooper up with another shake. Then I’ll be back.”

“Great, another shake.” Fiona makes a disgusted face, and the man smiles. “Thanks, Nishant.”

“I’m going to go help Greer with feeding the kids. Cooper, why don’t you take my seat?” Stu kisses Fiona’s hand then heads for the door where Nishant is picking up a medical case.

“Actually, Cooper can help you, Stu.” A curious smile passes between Fiona and Cooper. “I’d like to speak to Imogene alone.”

Cooper gives me an extra long look. “She doesn’t bite.” He leaves with the other men, glancing back at me as I move to the chair closest to Fiona.

“Cooper looks brighter. Was he expecting you?” she asks me in a tired yet friendly voice.

“No. I only heard about … I decided today, just jumped in the car and drove.”

“Then it’s a nice surprise for all of us. I get to talk to someone new who isn’t stabbing me with needles or trying to make me drink another revolting nutrition supplement.”

“You’ve hit the jackpot with me. I hate needles, and I was a terrible waitress. Cooper may have informed you about that.”

“You made this, right?” As she hooks her thumb in the necklace, I nod.

“Cooper gave this to me a couple of months ago when I got sick again. After all we had been through—years of him not really speaking to me … or Stu—and then he showed up with this beautiful necklace. He had changed, and he was … happy. Who doesn’t want to see their son happy? I think it’s because of you.”

“I don’t know if I can take credit for that. I think Cooper is fairly happy living in Hera because of his friends and his job there.”

“Yes, he’s told me about that, although it took months to get that out of him.”

Fiona coughs into her fist, and I can’t take my eyes off the emerald ring she’s wearing. It’s an emerald in an emerald cut, beautiful and simple, the way I like gems. She notices me staring at it.

“It was a gift from Stu when we got married. I’ve always worn it, even when we got divorced.”

“It’s lovely. Green is my favorite color, and the emerald cut is my number one choice.”

Fiona adjusts her headscarf and then tries to push herself up straighter, as though she’s suddenly self-conscious of her appearance. She groans slightly, and the pain crosses her face in a tight grimace.

“May I help you?” I lean forward with my arms outstretched, ready to assist her tiny body.

“I’m fine. Thank you.” She leans back against her pillows. “When Nishant returns, he’s going to dope me up again. I don’t want to waste this brief time we have together on small talk. I’m not much of a small talk kind of woman.”

“Neither am I.”

“Good, then I’ll cut to the chase. I haven’t met one of Cooper’s girlfriends since he was with Sofia. Did he tell you about her?”

I shake my head, hating this topic already.

“She was his girlfriend in high school and college. She broke up with him after college graduation. It was years ago. She went off to med school, and Cooper joined the police force and then the FBI and was absent from our lives for most of the last six years. He showed up for family weddings and births, but he has kept his distance from Stu and me. Until a few months ago.”

She gives me a good hard look. “Do you love my son?”

I thought I was a direct person, but she certainly surprises me. I feel the heat rise on the back of my neck, my hands fidget, and I let my eyes roam the photographs on the wall.

“It’s a simple yes or no.”

I meet her stern expression. “Yes, I love Cooper. Technically, we’re not together any more, though.”

Her expression relaxes. “Pity. It’s difficult to love someone you think you can’t be with.”

I nod, and sit back in the armchair.

“And yet you came all this way to see him?”

“And to meet you.”

“Good. It’s good to meet the mother of the man you love, especially if she’s dying and you want to see what makes him tick.”

It’s mortifying to think she considers me an opportunist, and my expression must reflect that because she lets out a weak laugh. “I didn’t mean to sound crass. I genuinely think it’s admirable that you came to meet me. I am pleased that you feel it’s important enough to know me since I have very little time left. You must care an awful lot about Cooper to come to the MacKenzie house when everyone is on death watch when you and Cooper are not even
together,
as you say.”

“You said it. I don’t know what will happen, if anything, with Cooper and me, but I wasn’t about to miss the chance to meet you.”

“I like you, Imogene. And I like you more for saying that.” She smiles. “Then it’s my duty to tell you about Cooper and all those little pieces of the puzzle that you may be missing.”

“You read my mind. How did you know?”

“Because, when my son comes back into my life after a long absence and is happy about a young woman, and then the next time he’s sad about her, I know something is up. I have to take a lot of responsibility for what happened in his life and the effect I’ve had on him and this family. I don’t know how much he told you.”

“Very little. He said his family was full of liars and cheaters and divorce is inevitable for anyone who marries a MacKenzie.”

“Ouch, “Fiona says then looks around the room at all the photographs of her children at different stages. “It was foolish of me to think all of that was behind us. Cooper still harbors a grudge. I didn’t know. I’m grateful he chose to return, and I’ve been given a second chance to see the old Cooper, the one who used to be my most sensitive child and most loving.”

“I am, too. This big family suits him.”

“It always did. He loved the family togetherness. It was when Stu and I divorced that Cooper became disenchanted with all of us. I was very cavalier about the divorce. I thought kids, especially teenagers, were resilient and Cooper would get over it, and in time, we’d be close again. I was very wrong about that. But, because Stu and I were not faithful to one another, in Cooper’s eyes, it was a betrayal to the whole family. It was. And it only got worse when we both remarried and had more failed marriages. I didn’t realize the effect I had on my kids until three of my children also had marriages that ended up in divorce. Cooper took everyone’s failings personally and blamed his parents, rightly so, for the disintegration of the very safe, loving world we had initially created. Stu and I have talked about this a lot.”

“You two seem very close, considering you’re divorced.”

“We still love each other. The mistake we made all those years ago was that we chose to give up instead of working on our problems. It seemed so easy to divorce and start over with new people, and I loved my corporate job. All I thought about was how my life wouldn’t change much.

“This house was our investment property that we bought relatively cheaply before the housing boom, and we rented it out in those days. After the divorce, I moved here and brought in a new husband, and Stu remarried and had more kids. Cooper’s world was turned upside down. Two houses, more siblings, separate households, constant fighting between Stu and me and the new spouses, and when you mix that in with my kids’ teenage hormones, it was a disaster.”

“I thought he was lucky for having a big family.” I shrug. “I didn’t think it could be as bad as he claimed.”

“I’m optimistic that he thinks his family is getting better. I’d like to think I’m leaving him with some hope.”

“I believe he wants to help his family, but I don’t think he has much hope of his own.”

“Ah. That is what’s keeping you two apart.”

“We have different ideas, yes.”

“Behind you, in the bookcase, would you get that photo album on the bottom that has Cooper’s name on it?”

I get up from my chair and peruse the bookcase which is jam-packed with photo albums on every shelf. I find the albums with the kids’ names and pull out the one dedicated to Cooper. I hand it to Fiona, who opens it to the first page and holds it up for my viewing. It’s a full page photo of her holding Cooper as he bounces on her lap. His white blond hair matches hers, as does his wide-tooth smile.

“He was two here. Adorable, wasn’t he?”

“Very. He still is.”

“Take it.” She hands me the heavy album.

“You want me to put it away?”

“No, I want you to keep it.”

I trace Cooper’s name with my fingers, feeling an itchy desire to greedily take the coveted photographic archives of the man who has me in an emotional quandary.

“I can’t. This is too precious to leave with me. Shouldn’t you give it to Cooper or Greer to keep safe?”

“You’ll appreciate it more.” Fiona closes her eyes tightly with a sudden expression of pain, taking a deep breath. “I hope you don’t let Cooper lead you to believe in that MacKenzie curse nonsense. It was one thing when he felt betrayed as a teenager, but he’s a grown man and has to adapt like everyone else. He can be happy … Don’t back down on where you stand, Imogene.”

Oddly, her indirect and somewhat cryptic statements make perfect sense to me.

“And I have to ask one last favor of you, and I do not want you to be offended.”

“Okay. What can I do for you?”

“Please, don’t stay here. Don’t attend my funeral. I want you to remember me like this and our nice conversation. Go back to Hera and be there when Cooper goes back. He’ll need friends. He’s a very capable man, but under that tough exterior is a very vulnerable man, and it makes me happy to think that you’ll be there … as his friend or more.”

“Oh … all right,” I say with some dismay at being sent away.

Before I can say anything more, Nishant arrives and immediately recognizes Fiona’s pain. He begins fiddling with the bags hanging on the IV pole and then administers a syringe into one of the tubes.

“Is that better, Mom?” Cooper suddenly asks with concern from the doorway. With his hands shoved in his jeans pockets and his hair hanging in his face, he looks like a big, shy kid.

“Yes. I love Nishant.” She smiles at the young nurse.

Nishant chuckles, his boyish good looks making him look like he could be twenty or forty.

Fiona’s eyes close and I assume she’s drifting to sleep until her hand shoots out and grabs mine with a gentle grip.

“Imogene.” She smiles, opening her eyes briefly before closing them again.

I stand and look down at her, knowing this is the last time I will see her. Then I say goodbye to Nishant, who will be with her when she takes her last breath, and I meet Cooper in the hallway.

“What have you got there?”

“Your mother insisted I take this photo album for myself. It’s all about you.” I hug the album to my chest in case he thinks he’s going to put it back in his mother’s room.

“Why does she think you’d want that old thing?”

“Because it’s when you were a happy family, and it was the most important part of your life.”

“
Was
being the operative word. The present is more important.”

“I’ll take good care of it unless you would rather have it.”

“No. You keep it.” He taps the book with a finger, contemplative for a moment. “You must be hungry. Let’s have some dinner together.”

My thoughts hang on that word
together
.

Twenty-Eight

Every room on the first floor is overcrowded. More relatives and friends have arrived with covered casserole dishes and bags of food that they hand off to Fiona’s sister Beth, who is running the kitchen. People fill plates, taking food from the mysterious aluminum covered trays and the beverages and desserts scattered across the kitchen island and table. They eat standing up, leaving their dirty plates and dishes on any available surface before they move into the living room to visit with Fiona’s immediate family members.