Fade (40 page)

I couldn’t lift my arm to do it. Everything faded, just as Ronan said memory did.

“I love you,” I whispered.

Dace’s wolf threw his head back and screamed in agony.

Chapter Twenty-Seven

W
e have to move her,” someone murmured far off in the distance, the feminine tone worried.

I knew that voice somehow.

“He won’t let us close,” someone else said.

I struggled to open my eyes, to see. They refused to cooperate. Everything refused to cooperate. I was mired in thick mud, unable to feel anything or move.

“If he doesn’t let us move her, she’s going to die,” a third voice whispered sadly.

Were they talking about me? I tried to frown and tell them that I wasn’t dying. I was fine. Not even in pain.

Something whined in my ear. The sound was tortured and broken. I knew that sound though. In this life and every other, I’d known that sound. I loved that sound and the animal that made it.

I tried to reach for him, to comfort him, but everything went black.

“Ari, baby.” My dad called to me in the darkness. I heard the tears in his voice. Splashes of water fell on my face. “I’m here.”

I wanted to smile at him, to thank him.

Something tugged at me.

I felt different, like I was only half a person. Something was missing.

My soul.

Yes. Half of my soul was missing. I floundered, trying to locate it.

A wall loomed in front of me, impenetrable and impossibly high.

I whimpered at the sight … and faded again.

“How is he?” Dad’s voice whispered through the darkness.

“Not good,” a deep voice whispered back. Gage. What was he doing here? Why weren’t they with Dace? He was hurt. He needed them.

“He’s no better?” Dad sounded weary and heartbroken.

“If she doesn’t make it through surgery, I don’t think he’ll ever come back.” Gage sounded as sad as Dad. “I don’t think he’ll want to.”

I wondered what they were talking about; who wouldn’t wake up. I tried to ask … and was driven under again.

I floated this time, barely there.

Everything felt like the echo, misty, and distant.

A machine beeped steadily somewhere far off, but I ignored it. There was something important. Something I needed. I searched through my mind, trying to figure out the problem.

The wall loomed again, preventing me from finding what I needed. Whatever I needed to find lay on the other side of the wall.

Memory flickered.

Brilliant green eyes shone with devotion.

Dace.

Memory flickered stronger this time. The words I’d heard earlier. They’d been talking about Dace. He lay somewhere on the other side of that wall, and didn’t want to come back.

I battered at the wall, desperate to break it down, to find him. He couldn’t leave. He’d promised me he would never leave me, and I refused to let him shut me out now. I refused to lose him like I had my mom.

I felt like I waded through mud again.

I ripped at the bricks, clawing and tearing, but moving so slow.

The machine beeped faster.

A brick in the wall shifted a millimeter. Dust settled at my feet.

I pushed at it again. It shifted an inch. I sobbed, tearing at the brick in desperation to break through to Dace and bring him back.

Time moved in disjointed lurches. One minute I struggled through mud, and the next, I was clear. I went back and forth until everything hurt. I felt drained and weak.

I ignored it all and kept tearing at the bricks separating me from Dace.

My fingers started to bleed.

The machine beeped faster.

“Something’s wrong,” someone cried in alarm. The words sounded as if they came through a tunnel that went on for miles. Invisible hands grabbed at me, trying to pull me back. I shoved them away, unwilling to go anywhere without Dace. He’d promised not to leave me, and I needed him. The world needed him.

A corner of the brick shifted out of place. A tiny beam of light trickled through.

Dace!
I screamed, trying to shove myself through that tiny hole, trying to find him. He couldn’t leave me.
You promised,
I sobbed, beating at the wall.
You promised me
!

“She’s fading,” someone said.

Arionna
… . A sigh. Dace’s voice.

The machine stopped beeping.

Everything fell away.

“I love you,” Dace whispered. His voice was an echo, a memory. He cried, just like Dad had cried. “Oh god, I love you.”

I struggled to resurface, to tell him not to cry, and that I loved him too. I didn’t want him to be sad. So long as he was with me, everything would be okay. I couldn’t find my way to him though. Everything was dark, and I was so tired. I felt like a wisp of smoke. If I closed my eyes, I’d blow away.

“Come back to me, love,” he pleaded, agony in his voice. “Please, come back.”

“She’s gone,” someone unfamiliar whispered.

“No, no,” Dace said, sounding broken. “I can’t reach her. I can’t …” His voice cracked. “Please, don’t take her from me.”

Pain tore through me like a thousand knives stabbing into my flesh, but it didn’t come from me. It came from Dace. His heart was breaking, and I felt every shattering piece stab into me. His pain ripped me apart from the inside out, slicing and shredding through everything I was, melting me.

The sensation stopped as quickly as it started.

A howl of defiance tore through the air, flinging me skyward. Everything spun around me, black swirling as if I flew through a wormhole.

I landed with a thud, then crawled to my feet. I knew this place.

I turned slowly, trying to brace myself for what I knew I’d see.

The sight thrummed through me until I vibrated like a guitar string.

Fenrir lunged against his chain, froth spurting from his mouth and flecking his fur with beads of white. A river of it flowed beneath his feet, cutting a canyon of desiccation into the rock. The ribbon-like chain around his neck stretched like a bowstring and snapped him back to the ground. Everything trembled as he landed. Even the massive rocks around us groaned in protest.

Fenrir climbed back to his feet and prepared to leap. He stopped and sniffed the air.

I stopped breathing as he turned his head in my direction. Rage seared into me, burning me everywhere it touched.

His lips curled back from massive teeth.

Arionna, come back to me.

Fenrir growled, the sound shaking me from the inside.

Please.

Rock shifted and cracked as Fenrir lunged.

I love you.

I fled toward that voice.

Someone held my hand and crooned to me. I would know that voice anywhere: Dace.

My eyes fluttered.

His crooning stopped.

“Arionna?” My name was a whisper on his lips, hopeful and afraid to hope all at once.

My eyes fluttered again.

“I’ll go find Alex,” Ronan’s voice said from somewhere across the room.

Ronan. I frowned and opened one eye. Sunlight poured in through windows across the room. I recognized absolutely nothing.

“Love?” Dace’s voice trembled. His hand shook in mine.

I turned my head slowly in his direction, scared I still dreamed. Bright green eyes met mine. His face was shadowed, like he hadn’t been sleeping.

A memory whispered through me.

“You tried to leave me.” My throat hurt. A lot. I frowned at Dace, upset and confused.

His expression cracked.

I frowned again, so confused. “Where am I?”

“The hospital,” he said, raising a trembling hand and stroking along my face with his fingertips. “How do you feel?”

“I don’t know.” Why couldn’t I remember anything? I wracked my brain. I remembered … pain. Shouldn’t I be hurting? “What happened?”

“You died,” he whispered, his voice breaking. “Sköll attacked you, and I couldn’t get there in time.”

Sköll?

Memory slammed into me hard, everything rushing back. Dace being hurt. Sköll and Hati. Ronan. Dace’s wolf. Geri and Freki. My eyes darted to Dace.

“How did you … ?” I swallowed. My throat was on fire, the words barely there at all. “You were hurt.”

“I’m fine,” he said.

I looked at him and saw the truth for myself. He truly did heal quickly. Relief wound through me.