Exposing Kitty Langley (4 page)

“Yeah, I’m fine.” She said the words
but her pained expression, and her slow movement, told me otherwise. “Why did
you say that? You know, about us being together during the party?”

I shrugged. “I’m not sure. It just
came out. You know, if you’re hurt you should go to the nurse’s station and get
an excuse to go home.”

“Thanks, Reed, but I’ll be fine.”

I stared down at her for a moment,
not sure what to do next. “Okay. Well, see ya.”

“Yeah, okay.” She turned and walked
bravely away.

I didn’t know what to do. She was
clearly in pain, but she wouldn’t listen. It’s like she had this death wish or
something.

“Wow, that was intense,” Haley said,
coming up behind me. “You charged in there like a knight in rescue mode. All
you needed was a white horse.”

I didn’t miss the sarcasm. “Shut up!
Let’s get some lunch.”

Kitty

Every step I took was painful. When
Trent threw me down I landed hard on my backpack, jabbing me in the back of the
ribs. With every movement I felt pain, but I couldn’t let it weaken me. I knew
it was just the beginning. I had to stay strong for all that lay ahead. If I
had any doubts about trying to regain my position in the B’s, it was quenched. I
had tasted a small amount of the pain I had caused so many for so long. There
was no going back for me, and I would never be the same again. And I was glad
for it. Suddenly my thoughts went to Reed, and I smiled. He was there again,
stepping out of the blue and into my life like a safety net. He was angry about
the way Trent was treating me, even lying to protect me. His anger made him
even more handsome to me, if that were possible. My smile grew wider as I
thought of the way he responded to Trent. I’d heard he was shy.

“What are you smiling about?” I
heard a familiar voice say, breaking my thoughts.

I glanced up and into the amused
eyes of Bunnie, the others surrounding her.

“I see you’ve made it through the
day—so far. Haven’t given up, or run home crying yet, but that will all change
real soon.”

“Listen, Bunnie, about the other
day—”

“Don’t even think about apologizing
to me!” she snapped. “You of all people should know I never accept apologies—especially
coming from someone who was supposed to be my friend. You can keep your
apology, but I have to warn you that life won’t be very easy for you now. You
see, not only do we have it in for you, but it also seems that now that you’re
on your own, everyone you’ve ever been mean to wants a piece of you. If I were
you I’d just change schools. Maybe transfer to East Windrake High. Oh yeah,
because of the rivalry, you can’t transfer over there either. Sorry, but it
looks like you might have to move.” She smirked.

The others burst into laughter as
they walked away and left me standing there alone.

I wanted to be angry but she was
right—everyone was after me now. If I were smart I would’ve just left, but I
couldn’t. I’ve been many things over the years, but I’ve never been a quitter,
and I deserved everything coming to me—and worse. I’ve been a bad person for
the last several years—hurt many people. I’ve bullied, started rumors, stolen
boyfriends, threatened, and cheated on class assignments. I even burst into a
bathroom stall when Marcia was using the bathroom and took her picture, and
then posted it on the Internet. Okay, actually it was Heidi that did that, but
I was there. You name it and I’ve done it, or at least participated in some way.
How could I run away after all that I’ve done? I deserved to pay the
consequences for everything. It’s the only way I could live with myself. I just
couldn’t believe I had allowed myself to become that—that monster. I’ll never
fully understand how I let that happen. But never again will I allow myself to
do such things—no matter what someone says or does to me.             

My next class was Gym. We’d been
playing volleyball for the last two weeks. I wasn’t very good, but I’d been slowly
improving. Usually I was picked for teams early on, but on this day I was dead
last.

My team was losing when the ball
flew toward me. I jumped up and hit it, sending it sailing over the net. For
that brief moment I was happy, but in the next moment the ball came crashing
into me like a meteor, knocking me to the ground. Everyone laughed. Although I
was hurting, I got slowly up and shook it off. The game got going again, and
again I was hit—and again. It didn’t take a genius to figure out they were doing
it on purpose. By the fourth hit the coach took notice and came to break it up.

She pulled me to the side. “Kitty, I
don’t know what’s going on, but do you want to sit out the rest of the game?”

“No, Coach. I’m fine.” I knew the
abuse would stop now that the coach was taking notice.

“Are you sure? You look pale.”

“I’m sure, Coach.”

“Well—okay, if you’re sure. Get back
in there.”

“Thanks, Coach.”

By the time class was over, I felt
like I’d been in a football game, tackled over and over again. For a brief
moment, however, I was sort of proud of how I’d handled it. I couldn’t let them
break me down—not on the first day.

Finally my last class for the day
had ended and I was relieved the torture was over. I had just closed my locker
and was making my way down the hall when two girls, Katy and Marcia, of all
people, slammed into me, sending me sprawling to the floor. Before I could get
up, another girl’s backpack swung and hit me in the face. Everyone was having a
real good laugh at my expense, pointing and saying cruel things.

“Why doesn’t she just die already?”
someone said through their laughter.

I was horrified at the remark. Had I
ever been that cruel? I didn’t think so. The tears watered my eyes, threatening
to spill over, but I couldn’t let them see me cry. I just couldn’t—so I used
all my restraint and held them back.

I got up slowly, picked up my
things, and made my way to my car, keeping my eyes fixed on the ground in front
of me. When I pulled the door shut I almost lost it right there, but there were
people still around to see, so I started the car and held my tears until I left
the parking lot. Then I cried all the way home.

Chapter Eight

Kitty

Arriving home was like finding a
cold pool of water after endless days in the hot desert. I almost purred when I
stopped the car at the end of the driveway. If only I could’ve stayed there—in
the safety of my childhood home, forever.

I practically limped into the
kitchen to take some ibuprofen before heading upstairs to take a hot bath. I
stripped my clothes off and reluctantly peered into the mirror, afraid of what
I might find. I gasped. It was worse than I had anticipated. Bruises had already
formed on my back, side, and hip. Tears welled again as I studied them. They
were so striking against my pale skin that they almost didn’t look real. I
tried not to feel sorry for myself as I stepped slowly into the tub, but as I
sank deeper, I couldn’t help but feel weak and helpless—like a total loser.

Afterwards, I made myself
comfortable on my bed while I worked on my homework.

Two hours later, I heard Mom come in
with groceries in hand. “Kitty, honey, would you help me with the groceries?”
she called up to me.

I grimaced. I couldn’t let my mom
know what had happened. It would break her heart to know the whole school hated
me. She always thought I was so popular. I knew I had to keep my injuries from
her and Dad.

I was careful as I unloaded the
groceries from the van. I didn’t let her see the painful faces I made as I
carried the bags in and shoved them on the counter.

“Mom, if it’s okay I’m gonna go back
up and finish my homework.”

“Oh, sure honey. Do you want me to
make some more grape Kool-Aid and bring you up some?”

I smiled. My mom knew how much I
loved that stuff. “That’d be great. Thanks.” I turned and started my way to the
stairs.

“Kitty, are you all right? You’re
walking funny.”

“Am I? Yeah, I’m fine.” I sucked it
up and hurried back upstairs before she could drill me further. I hated keeping
things from her, but somehow telling her that everyone hated me seemed far worse.

When bedtime arrived, I groaned as I
slipped slowly into my bed. I let my body relax, staring up at the ceiling as
the tears flowed. I knew the decision to help Phoebe was the right one, and I
was relieved to be free of the B’s, but I was also afraid. I was afraid of what
pains each day would hold for me—afraid of the persecution that was inevitable.
The whole thing could be summed up as this: I set myself up as superior above
others, and now I was being humbled. I could either take it, be strong, and
come out on the other side a better person, or I could buckle under the weight
of it and die. I knew what I had to do, but could I do it? I would try to be
strong and get through it, but what if I got seriously hurt or worse? I was so
exhausted that I fell asleep before I finished that thought and slept soundly.
When my alarm clock blared at six a.m., I wanted to cry—actually, truth be
told, I did cry a little.

My mom brought me a Pop Tart and a
glass of orange juice, and I ate while I got dressed. On this day, I took less
time in the mirror since it made little difference anyway. I felt like crap. I
took three ibuprofen tablets before heading out the door—then went back inside,
grabbed the entire bottle, and stuck it in my backpack.

At school everyone seemed more
verbal about their hating me than even the day before. I heard nasty comments
as I walked down the hall, most of which I was able to ignore. Some threw
spitballs at me in class, and one girl purposely knocked my books off my table
in passing. It didn’t go unnoticed by the teachers however. Two of my teachers
kept me after class, asking if everything was all right. I assured them I was
fine, but they didn’t buy it.

When I got to my locker, people were
gathered around whispering and laughing. I opened the door to find a pile of
notes that had been shoved through the vent holes. I knew the comments were
bad, but I couldn’t help but read one as I shoved them to the floor. It simply
said ‘You’re gonna die!’ with a smiley face drawn on it. I gathered what I
needed then closed the locker door. I thought about leaving the papers there on
the floor, but something compelled me to lean down and pick them up. I was
thankful the trash can was only a few feet away.   

In Gym we played volleyball again, but
the coach gave strict warnings to anyone who played hardball. That did little
to ease my comfort.

Finally we were winning when the
ball came rushing at me. As I jumped up to meet it, a girl’s elbow came down to
meet my face. That was the last thing I remembered.

When I came to, I was sprawled out
in the nurse’s office with a cold compress on my face. I moaned, trying to sit
up.

“Oh, just lie still, dear,” I heard
a woman’s voice say.

“What happened?” I asked, my voice
still groggy.

“You got hit during a game of
volleyball. It was an accident, of course. I’m afraid you’ve got a nasty bruise
on your cheek, dear.”

I instinctively reached up to touch
it and winced.

After a minute, I sat up and handed
the compress to the nurse. “I think I’m ready to go back to class now.”

“Well, you don’t have to go back to
class, dear. I can excuse you to go home, if you’d like.”

“No ma’am. I think I’ll go to class,
besides, I need to change.”

She looked me over for a few
minutes, probably wondering if I hit my head too hard. “Well, if you’re sure.”

“Yes ma’am.”

The rest of the day wasn’t much
better. The bruise on my face was impossible to hide, and that fact alone
seemed to amuse the entire student body.

I ran into Reed in the hallway. His
eyes grew wide as he took in my appearance. “Kitty, what happened to you?!” he
asked, stopping me as I tried to pass him.

“It’s nothing, Reed. You’d better
keep going.” I tried to go around him but he cut me off.

“Tell me what happened to you.”

“If I tell you will you leave?”

“Maybe.” He started to reach up and
touch my bruise but stopped himself.

I sighed. “Fine. I had a run-in with
a girl’s elbow during a volleyball game. There—I told you, now go.”

“Did you go to the nurse’s station?”

“Yes. I woke in the nurse’s office.”

“What do you mean you woke there?”

I huffed. “Reed, this isn’t
important. You really shouldn’t be seen with me.”

He took my arm, gently but
unyielding, and walked me outside where we were instantly alone.

“There, no one can see us, now
explain.”

I sighed again. “Okay. I was knocked
unconscious and woke in the nurse’s office. That’s all.”

“Well, why didn’t you go home?”

“I didn’t want to.”