EXPECTING HIS CHILD (3 page)

"I won't," he assured her. "I just tell the truth. I'd say something else," he said, allowing his gaze to linger on her full breasts. "But I don't want you to take a swing at me. You might hurt yourself. Are you hungry for Chinese food or not?"

She blinked and paused as if debating whether to hit him, anyway. "I'm hungry, period. Let's eat inside. I didn't expect you," she said, leading him though the back door to the cool kitchen.

"Didn't your mother tell you to always expect the unexpected from a Coltrane?"

Her smile wavered. "My mother didn't get an opportunity to teach me anything about the
Coltranes
. She died when I was born."

Noah immediately regretted his joke. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean any disrespect."

"That's okay. Besides, my father and brothers gave me an earful about the
Coltranes
." She plucked the containers of food from the bag.

"I'm sure they did," he muttered, and carefully voiced his next thought. "I realize you descend from Amazons and you could easily harvest an entire field of corn in the morning, deliver your baby at lunch and finish up another field in the afternoon. But do you ever think you might have problems when you deliver the baby?"

She drummed her fingers on the cabinet. "If you hadn't included the Amazon part, I would say no. But the truth is, although I don't worry about it a lot and the doctor says I'm perfectly healthy," she emphasized, "I think about it every now and then."

He saw the fleeting vulnerability and longing in her eyes and remembered how he had felt when his mother died. "You still miss the chance of knowing her, don't you?"

"I would have given anything to know her. I've always missed her and I probably always will. I was lucky to have two brothers who tried very hard and awkwardly at times to make up for the loss." She pushed her hair behind her ear. "What about your parents?"

"I think I miss more of what might have been. My parents weren't happy together."

Martina lifted her eyebrows. "My parents were crazy about each other. My brothers told me that was why my father never seemed happy after she died. Looking at me was too painful for him, because I reminded him of his loss."

Noah realized he had known Martina's mother was dead, but he'd never heard the whole story, and they'd agreed not to speak of their families during their time together in
Chicago
. It made him see her in a new light. "We had a foreman named Zachary, who taught my brothers and me about being a man. Zachary always said the strongest love survives distance and death, and it always makes you a better man."

She narrowed her eyes. "Are you saying my parents didn't love each other?"

"I'm saying your dad missed an opportunity to love and be loved by a little girl who could have taken away some of the hurt."

Martina looked at Noah for a long moment. He could practically see her mind poking at his statement, examining and pondering, then setting it aside. She glanced at the boxes of food on the counter. "Dibs on the sweet 'n' sour chicken."

They dug into the food, and Martina didn't eat nearly as much as Noah had expected. "I thought you were eating for two. You made it sound like you're eating everything but the living-room furniture."

"I'm not eating for two. It's more like I'm eating for one and one-twelfth. Besides, I wanted to save room for ice cream." She smiled with mischief. "I need my calcium."

"Have you had an ultrasound yet?"

She nodded as she scooped fudge-swirl ice cream into two bowls. "Two months ago. The way the baby was positioned didn't reveal its sex, but I have a feeling it will be a—"

"—girl," he interjected.

"—boy," she said at the same time with a look of surprise on her face.

"I would have thought you'd have some sort of macho expectation about producing a male," she said.

"And I would have thought you'd have some sort of feminist expectation about producing a female," he said. "Both wrong about each other. Looks like we've got a long way to go to get to know each other."

Her face fell. "I still think e-mail is the best solution."

"It hasn't been that bad this time," he said, rising from his chair and walking closer to her. Following an impulse that could get him kicked, bitten or scratched, he lifted her finger to his lips and sucked the ice cream from the tip. Her eyes grew wide and she jerked her hand from his.

"What has made you more reasonable this time?" he asked. "Maybe you like me a little more than you thought you did."

She took a quick breath and a dozen emotions swept through her blue eyes. Noah would swear one of them was desire. Maybe he was getting through.

"Food," she said. "It was definitely the food."

* * *

It was definitely not the food that was keeping her awake tonight, Martina thought much later as she threw back the covers on her bed. Every time she closed her eyes, a picture from the first time she and Noah had made love flashed across her mind.

She sat up in bed and sighed, holding her head in her hands and surrendering to the memory for just a moment. They'd eaten Chicago pizza for dinner, then Noah had taken her back to his suite to show her how he traded futures on the Chicago exchange on his laptop. His excitement had been contagious, and after a while, she'd been more caught up in his enthusiasm than his words.

"You're not listening," he said, sitting beside her, his thigh rubbing against hers.

Martina felt her cheeks heat. "I was," she insisted.

"Okay, what happens after the price jumps ten percent?"

"I didn't know there'd be a quiz."

He laughed, and the rich, dark sound curled inside her and heated her down to her toes. He tugged her from her chair and pulled her onto his lap. "If you weren't thinking about futures, then what were you thinking about?"

Bracing herself on his shoulders, she considered dodging the question, but followed another instinct, instead. "I was thinking about you," she said, lifting her fingers to his solid jaw. "You have such a passion for almost everything you do."

His eyes darkened and he pressed her fingers to his lips. "More than one person has called me crazy for my ideas."

"A little crazy is not a bad thing," Martina said, feeling a relentless urgency grow in her belly and blood.

He sucked her finger into his mouth, and she held her breath while he held her gaze. "I'm getting a passion for Martina."

"That could be too crazy," she whispered as he pulled her face closer to his.

"Too late," he said, and took her mouth.

Martina's world spun. He had kissed her before, but tonight was different. She felt it in the air, in his touch, inside her. He made love to her mouth, tasting her, seducing her, savoring her until her heart clamored for more. She sank her fingers into his hair, luxuriating in the soft, wavy texture.

He pulled away and she felt almost as if she was in a dream. Giving her a dozen opportunities to stop him, he slowly, deliberately lifted her sweater over her head and unfastened her bra.

"Do you want this?" he asked, touching the aching tips of her breasts with his thumbs.

Her mouth went dry and she closed her eyes. Her heart hammered a mile a minute. There were reasons, very valid reasons, she should stop, but her brain could not produce one of them at this moment. She had never wanted a man so badly in her life. It wasn't so much his incredible body as much as it was his mind, his very being. The way he thought, the way he acted.

"Yes," she said, the honesty coming from deep inside her. "I want you."

He dipped his mouth to one of her nipples and took it into his mouth.

Fire had raced through her, and Martina had bitten back a moan. He would consume her, she'd thought, and a lick of apprehension had mingled with the heat of her desire. He would learn more about her tonight than any man ever had. She would have to keep a part of herself from him. He must never know
,
she'd decided, that he was her first.

Distress crowded Martina's throat, and a soft sound escaped, breaking her reverie. Somehow she had been convincing enough that Noah hadn't guessed. He had been so caught up in their passion that he still didn't know he had been her first. Unable to sit still one second longer, she rose from her bed. She needed to leave these memories behind, to exorcise them, if only temporarily, from her mind.

She instinctively walked toward the nursery. She hadn't bought a crib or even painted the baby's room yet. The only piece of furniture in the room was a toy chest full of odds and ends she'd begun to collect. She knelt beside the light oak chest and touched the infant sleepers, receiving blankets, a stuffed bear, then brought out the little box that made her heart contract and expand every time.

Baby booties.

It was the silliest thing; but the tiny, tiny white booties made it all feel real and right to her. Seeing Noah tonight had confused her, and she didn't need to feel confused. Martina knew what she had to do. She had to keep her head together and love and raise this baby. She had to resist the urge to lean, especially on Noah. He made her think. Every time he visited her, there was more to like, more to admire, more to want and, in turn, more to fear.

The thought of knowing him more made every muscle in her body tense. It wasn't just that he was a Coltrane, although heaven knows that was enough. Martina had a feeling in her heart, in her blood, that if she fell for Noah, his being was so big and powerful that he would swallow her and she would simply disappear.

Chapter 3

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"
H
ave you heard anything from—" Martina's sister-in-law, Jill asked "—your assistant procreator?"

Martina grinned as the two women carried the results of their shopping trip into her condo. "I like that. Takes a lot of the messy emotion out of it?"

"I wouldn't want to upset the mother-to-be."

"By using expressions like former lover, or father of my child, or one of the top five men my brothers most hate." Martina gritted her teeth. "Thank you."

"Hate is a strong word," Jill said, revealing her public-relations background. "Your brothers may not really hate Noah Coltrane. They don't even know one another."

"They hate him," Martina said, stomping upstairs to the nursery. "Brock hates him because he's a Coltrane and one of their bulls jumped the fence and had entirely too much fun with some of our heifers. It made calving season a real pain because the bull was the wrong size and some of the calves were too big, and then there's your husband, Dr. Tyler Logan, who used to get into fistfights with Noah on a weekly basis when they were in their teens. And then there's the small matter that Noah got their baby sister pregnant. Yeah, I would say his name is dirt."

"But people change and they haven't truly sat down and talked since they became adults."

"That's to prevent bloodshed and eventual death by lethal injection.
Texas
believes in capital punishment."

Jill chuckled and put her arms around Martina in a hug. "Don't you think you're exaggerating just a little?"

"No," Martina
muttered
.
"And I'm not exaggerating when I say how nice you are to check on me and go baby shopping with me." Martina knew Jill was unable to bear children because of an injury from an automobile accident, and her sister-in-law's continued generosity often brought tears to her eyes. Jill hadn't allowed her injury to prevent her from being a mother to a child who needed her. She and Tyler had adopted a son as soon as they got married.

Jill's watery gaze met Martina's damp one and both women laughed. "At least you can blame this on hormones. I'm really okay. It's amazing what marrying your brother and adopting Sam have done for me. I just want you and your baby to be healthy and happy." She sobered. "And I notice you didn't answer my question about your assistant procreator."

Martina made a face. "Yes. He found me." She pulled bumper pads and sheets with a soothing cloud motif from a bag.

"And?"

"And he immediately said we should get married, and I told him never, and he said we need to get to know each other, and I suggested e-mail."

"You must have felt something for him to get involved with him," Jill said.

Martina didn't like being reminded of her initial attraction to Noah. It had been strong and sexual, and she wasn't feeling very sexy these days.

Her doorbell rang, saving her from responding.

"Pizza," a male voice called.

Martina felt a twinge. The voice was familiar. "I didn't order pizza," she muttered, rising from the floor. Although pizza sounded like a good idea.

Jill joined her at the top of the stairs. "Your pizza-delivery guy looks a lot different from mine."

Noah had let himself in her unlocked door. His intense gaze wrapped around Martina and squeezed before he gave a slight grin that made her stomach flip. How had he known she would be hungry? Martina rolled her eyes at herself. When was she not hungry?

"What a surprise," she said in a neutral voice, walking down the stairs.

He flipped open the lid to reveal a large, hot pizza with mushrooms and onions. She eyed him suspiciously. "How did you know they're my favorite toppings?"

"It's my job to know," he said in a voice that would melt brick.

Martina tried to ignore the way her heart sped up. "You're the man who arrived on horseback at Brock and Felicity's wedding," Jill said, her eyes growing wide in realization. "The
fa
—" She stopped and appeared to correct
herself
. "The fellow procreator."

Noah's jaw tightened. "Noah Coltrane. I'm the father of Martina's baby. And you?"

Martina ground her teeth. "This is my sister-in-law, Jill. She's married to
Tyler
."

"A pleasure," Noah said, shifting the pizza box so he could shake hands.

Jill nodded, still neutral. "You come bearing pizza?"

"I understand pregnant women get hungry," he said in the same sexy voice that made Martina feel hungry in all ways. "Satisfying Martina's appetite is my job."

Jill's lips twitched. "Something tells me you're up to the challenge." She glanced at Martina. "I should run and leave you two to your appetites and pizza."

"No. You don't have to go. There's plenty for—"

"I really need to get back." She gave Martina a quick hug and whispered, "Enjoy
yourself
. It's not as if you can get pregnant."

Shocked, Martina gaped at Jill.
Traitor!
"
Tyler
would not appreciate that comment."

"He may eventually," Jill said. "Take care and call me for anything."

"Yes, but—" Martina watched her sister-in-law smile and leave. She turned to Noah and scowled.

"Nice lady," he said cheerfully. "How are you?"

"I'm retaining water."

Looking down at her from beneath his black Stetson, he nodded. "I can take care of a lot of things, but probably not water retention. Pizza?"

"Yes," she said, and added dutifully, "thank you."

"My pleasure." He strolled into the kitchen in front of her, giving her an unobstructed view of his impressive backside. A memory flashed in her mind of the time Noah had coaxed her into making love in front of a mirror. The images of her naked body and his and the passion between them were so hot she prayed her thoughts didn't show on her face.

Noah turned and studied her. "Are you okay? You look flushed."

Darn
. "Heating for two." Martina smiled and headed for the freezer. She opened the door and stuck her face inside to cool her cheeks as she pulled out some ice cubes.

She dumped the ice into two glasses and grabbed a couple of soft drinks. "How are you managing to get your work done and take time out to visit me?"

"I keep my trading to a minimum on the day I see you and work on my other projects on the weekends. I can handle it," he assured her in that low, sexy voice.

Martina's gaze skimmed over his broad shoulders. Yes, he could probably handle just about anything he wanted. "You don't really need to visit so often," she said.

"Sure I do. You'd miss me," he mocked.

"Oh, I don't think—"

"Have some pizza," Noah interjected. "I have a surprise for you after you finish eating."

"What kind of surprise?" she asked, immediately curious.

"It's little."

"What is it?"

"Now if I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise." She gave a much-put-upon sigh. Noah's smile twitched with humor. "Your impatience reminded me a little of my brother Gideon."

"I don't know much about Gideon. Come to think of it, I don't know much about any of your brothers."

Noah simply nodded and ate a slice of pizza.

"Well?" she prompted. "Are you going to tell me about your brothers?"

"I didn't know you were interested in my family."

I'm not
, she opened her mouth to say, but immediately knew it wouldn't have been the truth. She was far more interested in Noah and his world than she should be. "I read an article about how a baby shares genes with the sisters and brothers of the mother and father, so it would probably be a good idea, as a mother, for me to know about your brothers."

"Uh-huh," he
said,
his expression a mixture of disbelief and amusement.

The amusement bothered her more than the disbelief. "You don't take me seriously, do you?" she asked. "You are tremendously amused by me, aren't you?"

His expression immediately turned deadly serious. "You may have a great sense of humor, Martina, but I have always taken you seriously – as a lover and now as the mother of my child."

Martina felt a shiver at the intensity in his expression. She often had the sense that by getting involved with Noah, she might as well be stepping into a hurricane. She was drawn to Noah's dynamic energy and the calm center he seemed to possess, but she always found herself wondering how she could put one foot in and keep her other foot out. She still wondered how she could be involved with him and keep herself.

"But you want to know about my brothers," he said. "Adam is the oldest. He is quiet and traditional. He manages the cattle on the ranch. His temper is more of a slow burn. He's very serious and could afford to lighten up every now and then. My brother Jonathan is the peacemaker. He raises and breaks horses. He rarely gets angry at anyone other than himself. Gideon is a pistol. He has a quick temper, but he doesn't hold a grudge. He loves a good challenge."

"It sounds like all of you stick together."

Noah made a wry face. "For the most part, we've had to, what with our dad's problem. But we've been known to use our fists to persuade."

Martina couldn't help noticing Noah's hands, which were clasped together. She knew that when he was a young teen, he'd gotten into many fights. Part of what intrigued her about him was the way he had left his anger behind. She wondered how he'd done that. "Your father's drinking problem?"

"Yep. That and some of the other things our forebears have done. The
Coltranes
have a reputation to live down and another one we want to build. All of us want that."

"What was it like being the black sheep of the county?"

"Good and bad. Mostly bad. Teachers, neighbors, mostly everyone expected the worst when a Coltrane came around. So we often lived down to the expectations. That just ended up causing more trouble. Then my dad hired a foreman. His name was Zachary and he taught us how to fence and turned us into modern-day knights."

Martina blinked. "Modern-day knights? I knew all of you fenced. People were always afraid one of you might stick a sword in someone who ticked you off."

"There's that Coltrane rep again. Zachary started us out with
wiffel
bats. It was a big deal when he let us use one of his swords, and the biggest deal was when he gave us each a sword. We had to earn it," Noah said with a faraway look in his eyes.

"How did you earn it?"

"Grades, self-control, attitude and skill with the sword."

It was difficult for Martina to keep her objections against Noah intact when she pictured his transformation from an angry teen to a man. "I never heard anything about this."

"Most people haven't. Zachary left the ranch a few years ago. He told us we had the tools. We would always know what to do."

"You miss him," Martina said in surprise.

Noah nodded. "Yeah, I do."

"You've described your brothers," she ventured, picking up her second slice of pizza. "How would they describe you?"

"Besides a pain in the ass," Noah said with a wicked grin, "the driven dreamer,
the
one who is always trying to do impossible stuff."

"Impossible stuff like what?"

"Like trading cattle futures and making money at it. Running weekend roundups and increasing the ranch's revenue. Starting a fencing camp." He paused and met her gaze. "Trying to marry the
Logan
princess."

Martina felt as if she'd been punched by the look of determination on his face. Her heart hammered against her rib cage. "You want to marry me because I'm carrying
your
…" She broke off, refusing to use the words that sent her into a spin every time. "Because the baby I'm carrying has some of your genes. You don't want to marry me because you love me. You don't want me to come live with you because you can't live without me."

His eyes flashed with anger. "It would be tough finding that out now. When you left, you didn't give either of us much choice."

Her chest tightened. "I was just a fling for you."

"Martina, you are not
fling
material." His nostrils flared slightly and he narrowed his eyes. "Was it so easy to leave?"

His words echoed inside her, sending her perspective in circles. She had survived the past seven months by believing that what she and Noah had shared was a fling. She'd chanted it to herself day and night. "One of us had to do it. It had to be done."

"Why?"

Martina fought the jittery feeling spreading throughout her. She stood and tossed her napkin into the trash. "Because of our families. One of us had to stop it before we got in too deep."

She felt Noah behind her. "Did you succeed? Did you stop before we got in too deep?"

His question taunted her heart while his breath teased the back of her neck. She closed her eyes and mentally put her brick wall back in place. She turned and lifted her chin. "I think the general consensus is that I didn't get out unscathed," she said, putting her hand on her abdomen. "You said something about a little treat? Is it a brownie?"