Authors: Al K. Line
Time to be Alone
Goddamn gnomes, goddamn trolls, goddamn Dancer, goddamn vampires, and goddamn Hidden. I'm right, aren't I? My head was spinning. I felt like I'd been dragged out of bed by my short, dyed blond hair and shoved through one stupid, ridiculous, irritating and upsetting encounter after another.
It was too much and I'd had enough. I'm an Alone, I work solo out of choice, and precisely because I can't handle being pulled one way and then the other by other people's whims and crazy ideas. Things gets too complicated, convoluted and disorganized, and I end up not being able to work things through at my own pace. Clues and vital conversations get overlooked.
That means mistakes. And I don't do mistakes. Okay, I do, but I make them myself, not because of a "Team." Ugh.
Some wizards spend their time holed up in suitably magic-infused rooms, whiling away the years or the centuries with others just like them, perfecting their arts for no other reason than because they enjoy the immersion in all things Hidden. Honing techniques for harnessing the Empty, learning spells, giving talismans powers and all that stuff, but it's like learning how to ride a bike from a book—it's not the real thing. You'll fall off and hurt yourself when confronted with a metal frame and two wheels whatever knowledge you may have gained concerning physics and the balancing of such a device.
It's the same with magic. Take them out of their familiar and safe comfort zone and put them in a battle against an ancient warlock, or a seriously nasty demon, then see how they fare. Exactly. They may have conjured up demons in their faery-dust-lined room, but its a different matter when it's true life and death.
My kind of magic, and my kind of life, is hands on and visceral, and I can't work with other people for too long. I lose my edge. Yes, I like company, especially Kate's, and over the years people have come and, mostly, gone that I have worked with, but I know myself well enough to know that I am a true Alone—leave me be and I'll get the job done.
I'm okay with the knowledge I'm an introvert. Yes, I am an enforcer, and that entails meeting a lot of people and Hidden, but it's temporary. I flit between the different worlds like a heavy-handed wizard, doing what needs to be done, but I work solo for a reason—if I'm in other people's company for too long it drives me nuts.
My head was a mess. Thoughts whirled so fast I couldn't even hear myself think properly as the noise in the car after the gym became unbearable. It was like being in a room of ancient witches all intent on proving who was the best at talking loudly about the most inane things they'd seen and recounting it all in exaggerated detail. I was going to explode if I didn't get some quiet.
"See, I told you the gnomes would be a help," said Intus, lecturing from the dashboard as we drove.
"Yeah, great idea, Intus. I had to degrade myself and visit gnome limbo, and now I won't be good for anything for days. It's hard bringing Hidden back. They're so stubborn. And that male had a chin like a mangled sweet potato. And those stupid hats. What idiot thought it was a good idea to—"
"Oi, that's sexist. And speciesist," interrupted Intus.
"I think I need a pee," said Kate. "Faz, Faz, can we stop for a pee somewhere?"
"Hey, where we going anyway?" asked Dancer, leaning forward and shouting right in my ear.
"Enough! What is wrong with you all? That's it, I'm dropping you all off. Intus, it's time for you to go. Great seeing you. Please say hello to Illus and the kids, but I'll catch you later, buddy."
"No need to be like that, Spark. You know you like it when I come visit."
"I do, but I need time to think. Understand?" Intus nodded. She is a true friend, something I forget at times, but she understands me and knows how I work. For an imp she's rather insightful. For an imp.
"We need to find Grandma," said Kate.
"We have to find Rikka. Everyone is going to go crazy without him to keep things in line. I bet the vampires are already out there running amok, sneaky buggers that they are," whined Dancer, curling up a lip as I glanced at him.
"In case you've forgotten, Dancer, I am a vampire."
"I didn't mean it like that, Kate. But if the cap fits."
"That's enough!" It was like having a bus load of children with me. I felt myself ready to erupt at any moment. Can't people ever be quiet?
Intus said goodbye and was gone in a puff of smoke. I wafted it away. It always smells like rotten eggs—Intus said imps think it smells divine, which says a lot about imps. We drove the rest of the way in silence, everyone fuming at one insult or another.
I dropped Dancer off at his home, a very nice detached three-story Georgian house just a few streets from the Finnish Embassy—it certainly pays to be one of Rikka's main people. I wondered if I should move when I parked up and admired the house like I had on so many occasions.
My bank balance is healthy enough, but I never earn crazy money. Maybe I should increase my enforcer rates?
"Let me know if you find anything. Okay?" said Dancer as he got out.
"I will. And you too, anything at all." Dancer nodded, smiled at Kate—the weird half smile, half constipated look he seems to think is endearing—and he was gone.
My mind felt clearer already. I leaned back and rested my head on squeaky leather and sighed.
"Better?" asked Kate, smiling sympathetically.
"Better." I let my shoulders relax a little, and tried to pull myself together. All the inane chatter was too much. I was overloaded when I needed to focus and be able to think properly.
I looked out the window at the street. People were walking back from the pub or going out to the clubs, but it was relatively quiet. It was almost dark now.
Some would call it the time of the Hidden, but the truth is we are always around. Walking past you in the street, seen but not seen, sat next to you on the bus, maybe even in the cubicle next to you at work, although most of us have discovered a Regular life isn't for us. It's hard to punch in and out of work when you can access the Empty, and I guess that's why it's seen as the underworld to many of us, and why a lot of us are what Regulars would class as criminal types.
Dark magic is incredible, amazing and wonderful, but it does also attract some rather unsavory types of humans—not that I'm one of them, of course.
"Sorry about all that. We were a bit noisy, right?" She looked at me with concern as I sighed again and rubbed at my face.
"A little," I agreed. "I'm just better on my own, Kate. It's not your fault, or theirs. It's me. I can't think with too much going on. I need to do my own thing for a while."
"You need to sleep, Faz. That's what you need to do."
"Haha, I wish. But how can I? Grandma is missing, Rikka is missing, I have to find them."
"Come on, out you get. I'll drive. You're exhausted. You should see yourself."
"I'd rather not."
"Faz, you have to take care of yourself properly. You need to eat more after you, you know, use the magic. I thought you would be recovered by now."
"I know. It took a lot out of me last week, Kate, more than I realized. I just need to find Grandma and Rikka and I'll rest for a month, eat and get fat and then you won't fancy..." I trailed off. I'm such a lightweight, I know. Was I presuming, or was it now okay to talk about this stuff? Yeah, Faz Pound, Dark Magic Enforcer, Slayer of Demigods, Cringer at Sexy Friends, Almighty Coward in the Face of Relationships.
"Fancy you? You can say it, you know. And yes, I do. I thought we made that clear earlier? Finally. I must say, Faz Pound, for a seriously kick-ass magic enforcer you are a right idiot when it comes to reading the signs."
"Oh, right. Um, good."
"Idiot. Come on, out you get. I'll drive."
We swapped seats.
I think I fell asleep even before Kate had driven off.
A Night of Bliss
"Oh, ooh. Aah."
"Again, do it again. Aah, yeah, right there. Give it to me, Faz. Ooh." Kate groaned as a hand slid down her belly. She opened her mouth wide and I watched as it stretched wider still. Her eyes sparkled as she looked at me, her tongue pink and wet and she licked her lips, moving it slowly across the swollen red mouth.
"Again, really?"
"Yeah. Haha, go on, do it."
I picked up the spring roll and she bit down hard, pieces falling into her lap. She groaned and put her hand on her belly again. We were both stuffed.
We'd been eating for what must have been an hour. A huge takeaway delivery that pretty much had one of everything on the Chinese menu.
What, you didn't think I was talking about anything else, did you? Okay, sorry, just playing with you.
When I'd awoken, I was surprised to find us outside Kate's home. A nicely redeveloped red brick docklands building where she had a well-appointed pad, clean and airy, with a view over the bay. Mostly, that meant gray water, gray sky, and gray seagulls, but for once the sky was clear and it was still warm, so we sat out on the tiny balcony with trays of takeaway and stuffed our faces until we couldn't eat another thing.
"Boy, this is good," I said, rooting around in a carton for the last of the chow mein.
"Oh, yeah, the best. Feeling better?"
"Much. Thanks, Kate, this is just what I needed. Honestly, you're a great friend."
"Faz, let's drop the friend bit, all right? We are more than that, I think we can both agree." She looked at me, searching for answers, for signs, but all I did was gulp and nearly choke on my chow main. "Faz?"
"Sorry. It's just I've dreamed of this and never thought it would actually happen. Kate, I want you more than anything. I just thought, well, that maybe I was just imagining it. And because..." I didn't know how to put it, not without it coming out wrong. I was so tired too, so yeah, that's my excuse for being lame.
"Should I have hit you over the head and dragged you to the bedroom?" Kate said, smiling.
"Well, it wouldn't have hurt. That way I would have known."
"Silly. It's because of the vampire thing, isn't it?"
"No, of course not!" I protested. She searched my face, gave me a "look." Best to be honest. "Okay, yeah. I've seen you after you've fed, Kate, and always wanted to rip your clothes off, I might add. But I've seen the energy, the power, the blood magic course through your veins. Energy like that makes your body practically sing. But I've also seen you change, how it's slowly taking you over, little by little. Sorry, that's not what I wanted to say at all." I was blowing it. As usual.
"That's why I want you, need you, Faz. No, that's not right. Gosh, we're bad at this, aren't we? I know I'm different. There are these urges and I'm aware they are changing me, taking over. But I'm still me. I get cold, Faz, in my heart and in my head. I hear them, feel them, the other vampires. I see what they are, or what they will become, and it terrifies me. I don't want to be like that. Ever."
"I know, and you won't." It was a lie, and we both knew it. The vampire world is dark, uncaring, and cold toward humans. A race they see as utterly inferior. "You have to fight it, Kate, stay who you are. Stay kind and caring and don't let that world take you."
"Faz, I'm trying, and mostly it's fine. I feel like me, but then something happens. I feel the others stirring, calling to me. The strong ones are there, the old ones, Taavi and the others in that place of his, and they talk to me, draw me down, want to make me like them."
"We won't let them. You are part of their world, that was the choice you made, but you don't have to be them. You can stay you, just, you know, you have to feed when it's time." We have a list. We made an agreement, so I have taken Kate to feed. Nasty, cruel, bad humans only. Doing a job that should have been done by the law but people always fall through the cracks in the system.
Together, we clean it up, make it a better place. But it's still murder, and it still hurts. When it didn't, when she didn't feel guilt, shame, and horror, then she would be lost.
"Come on, let's clean up," she said, wiping her eyes and smiling at me.
"Okay." I was confused, not sure what was happening. I did as I was told.
We put the metal, paper, and plastic in the right recycling bins under the sink, then sorted out the rest of the mountain of leftovers. Kate put them in containers, then I stacked them in the fridge. It was so cathartic I can't tell you. A slice of normality, like we were a couple, and this was how we lived. Once finished, we sat on the sofa and she leaned into my shoulder.
We talked for a while, reassuring each other that everything would be all right. That she wouldn't be lost to the cold emptiness that is the lot of the vampire, that she must fight the decline. I said nothing, but she is more distant than she used to be, sometimes gone even though she is there.
Occasionally, I see anger, even a little disdain as she looks at others. The vampire nature taking over. But she can fight it, be the person she wants to be.
She spoke of Grandma and of Rikka, and that we would find them, that the next day she would leave me to it now I had eaten properly. And then she took my hand and said, "Time for bed."
My heart skipped a beat, my hands went sweaty, my mouth was as dry as the time I ate a troll, and I was as nervous as the first time I summoned a lesser demon and forgot how to send it back.
We walked into the bedroom hand in hand. The place was quiet, elegant. Simple lights were on low. It was just us, and the seagulls saying goodnight. Kate's bedroom was as I expected. Neatly made bed, a few nice pieces of furniture, a tasteful rug, and three ragged teddy bears nestled on the pillows. That came as a surprise. She saw me looking at them. "From when I was a baby. I kept them, to remember." Kate has no family—it's a long story.
"Cozy," I said.
She moved them over to a chair and patted the bed.
We lay there. Then we kissed. Magic is nothing compared to that kiss.
And we fell asleep.
Yeah, I might get killed the following day by who knows what, and that could have been my one and only chance to bed the woman I loved, adored, and worshiped, and I zonked out.