Everything She Wanted (19 page)

“I have his bag. He’ll want his stuffed dog and that purple ring he loves to chew on.”

Sam grabbed both off the sofa and tucked them in the bag. Kate
walked to the counter and grabbed a pen and the pad of paper next to the phone. She sat at the table writing, while Ben finished putting Alex’s food together.

“Ben, what time did he eat this morning?”

“Seven-­thirty.”

“He’ll need another bottle about ten-­thirty. I’ve written down his schedule, how many ounces of milk he eats, the general routine we’ve got him on. His new favorite
song to fall asleep to.” Kate smiled at Ben.

“It’s still playing in my head.” Ben smiled back.

“Which one does he like?” Sam asked.

“ ‘Row Your Boat,’ ” Ben said. “Over and over again. He bobs his head to the words as he eats his last bottle of the night. It’s very cute.”

Sam and Tyler both smiled and laughed.

“No problem. I know that one. J.T. will be happy to sing it over
and over again. He’s been on this nursery rhyme kick for weeks.” Sam picked Alex up from the sofa and handed him over to Kate. “Say bye-­bye to Mommy.”

Kate held Alex close and kissed his face several times. Alex grabbed fistfuls of her hair and held on. “You be a good boy. No playing with guns. Say please and thank you. Try not to wake up more than once so Elizabeth can get some sleep.”

“He’s going to be fine. We’ve got a playpen for him to sleep in right next to our bed. The alarm system on our place is the best you can get.”

“If that’s not enough, Sam is armed,” Tyler assured her.

Kate secured Alex in his car seat, tucked his favorite blanket around him, and handed him the stuffed puppy from out of his bag. She rose and looked at Ben. “You got the extra pacifier?
He only likes those.”

“I got it, plus the bottles. He’s all set.”

“What about extra burp clothes?”

“I put two in the bag. Kate, he’ll only be with Sam until tomorrow night. I promise, he will be safe.”

“I know. Of course he’ll be safe. Sam has a gun. He’s FBI. It’s fine.”

“You’re rambling, honey. Say goodbye.”

She turned back to Sam. “Bye. Thank you. I appreciate this.”

“Not as much as Ben will.” Sam winked. “Call anytime. As often as you like. I know how much I miss my munchkins when I’m working.”

“It’s fine.” Kate leaned down and kissed Alex on the head again. “Be good. I love you.”

Tyler stepped forward, carrying one of the bags and the base to Alex’s car seat. He patted Kate on the shoulder. “Don’t worry. He’s got two armed guards.”

“Thank
you.”

“See you soon,” Sam said, stepping out into the hallway. Tyler took the lead to the elevator. Ben and Kate stood in the door until they got into the car and the doors closed. Ben pulled Kate back into the apartment and closed and locked the door.

“I miss him already.”

“I know you do, honey.” Ben took her hand and pulled her down the hall to their room. “Which is why I’m going
to distract you from thinking about it.”

“Don’t we need to make plans and go to my sister’s place?”

Ben walked into the bedroom and pulled her around. She thumped into his chest. He wrapped his arms around her and stared down into her questioning eyes. “Later. We never finished what we started this morning.” He slid his hands down her back and over her hips. He squeezed her ass and pulled
her close. Her arms went up around his neck. He leaned in and nuzzled her neck, kissing her soft skin and inhaling her sweet scent.

“Well, when last we left off, I was naked and I had you well in hand.”

She always made him smile. “Yes, you did, darlin’.” Ben pulled her shirt up and over her head. He didn’t waste any time, unlatching her bra and sliding it down her arms. After that, his
clothes, hers, went flying until they were both lying in bed naked, their bodies pressed together.

Ben stared down at Kate.

She pulled him down for a kiss. He kept things soft, light, no demand. He lingered over her lips, pressing his to hers, slipping his tongue past her lips in a long glide. She settled beneath him, let go of her anxiety about handing Alex over to Sam, and gave herself
over to making love to him. Her hands slipped down his neck, under his arms, and around his back. She held him close, hugging him tight.

Her feet skimmed up his calves, her thighs squeezed his hips. “I need you,” she pleaded.

“What about your back? We can—­”

“Shh. I’m fine.”

He pressed his hard cock against her center, teasing her, tempting her. He kissed her neck, down over her
shoulder, and back to her chest. He planted little kisses over her breast, then licked the underside in one long sweep ending at her hard nipple. He took the bud into his mouth and sucked hard. Her fingers dug into his back. Her hips rocked against his.

He kissed his way to her other breast and took it into his mouth. The one he left got lost in his hand. He squeezed. She moaned and went limp
beneath him.

He reached down, wrapped his hand around her thigh, and squeezed. He slid his hand up her thigh to her hip, then pushed her thigh out wide and trailed his fingers over the sensitive skin and straight to her hot, wet core. Impatient to have her, he slid one finger into her slick center. She rocked her hips into his hand. He pulled his finger free, sliding it over her soft folds
and up over her clit. Her nails bit into his back again. She sighed out his name.

Desperate to have her, he answered that call to action and leaned to the side and snagged a condom out of the drawer beside the bed. Kate took advantage of his position and slid her hand down his taut belly and over his hard shaft. She wrapped her fingers around him and he bit back a groan. Her mouth pressed
to his chest, her teeth sank in and nipped at his pec. She liked to give him love bites. He wanted her to do it again. “Ah, God, Kate. The things you do to me.”

She bit him again and raked her nails down his side. The combination of the small hurt, the tingling that spread over his side, and her hand working up and down his cock nearly undid him.

He pried her hand off his dick and held
it down above her head. He took her nipple and sucked hard. Her free hand slid over his head and gripped his hair, holding him to her.

He couldn’t take any more of her sweet torture. He sucked her nipple and rose up until it pulled free of his lips. He tore the condom wrapper with his teeth and sheathed himself. All the while Kate never stopped touching him. Her hands rubbed up his chest,
her lips pressed kisses to his neck, her thighs held on to him, making it nearly impossible to get the condom on. Once he did, he plunged into her welcoming heat to the hilt in one hard thrust. Kate’s head went back and a soft moan escaped her open lips. He took her mouth in a deep kiss, sliding his tongue along hers. Desperate, out of control, he pulled nearly free of her, then thrust back home.
The sensations that swept over him lit a fuse on his restraint.

Kate planted her heels in the bed, raised her hips, and pushed against him as he thrust deep. She fell back to the bed and pushed up her hips, meeting him as he came back to her again and again. Her hands smoothed down his back and over his ass. She squeezed and pulled him to her. He didn’t retreat this time, but grinded against
her. She tilted and circled her hips, finding that spot that made her moan. He caught her rhythm, pulled out, then plunged back in, circling and rubbing against her clit.

Balanced on one hand, he used the other to stroke her breast, squeeze it into his palm, and pluck at her hard nipple with his fingers.

Kate panted beneath him, her body tightening, luring him to the peak. He refused to
leap without her and thrust deep again. She contracted around him, letting out a soft moan. He thrust into her hard and fast and followed her over the edge and into oblivion.

Ben collapsed on top of her, his breath sawing in and out at her neck. She wrapped her arms around him and held him close. She didn’t know what possessed her to be so aggressive, but he didn’t seem to mind. In fact, it
seemed to set him off.

Now, all she wanted to do was softly caress his back and run her fingers through his hair to soothe him. She wanted him close. She traced her fingers up his spine, featherlight. She made circles on his shoulders, then retraced the path back down his back to his very fine ass.

“I like that,” he whispered, planting a soft kiss on her neck.

“Yeah, I got a little
rough. You might have some scratches on your back. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.” He raised himself up on his forearms and stared down at her. “Don’t ever apologize for giving yourself over to me, trusting in me to let you know what I want, what I like, and what I don’t. You showed me what you wanted. I hope I gave you everything you needed. If not, all you have to do is ask, Kate. The time we share
together like this should always be honest. I never want you to leave our bed unless you’re happy and satisfied.”

“I am. You . . . The way we were together. It felt so raw and open and . . . I don’t know.”

“Freeing.”

“Yes. I wasn’t worried about what you’d think of my body, the way I touched you, the things I did. I just let go. I took in everything you gave me and I wanted to please
you, but I also wanted to be a part of what you felt.”

“First, your body is perfect. Made for me. We fit together, read each other, and complement each other. Never worry about the things you do, or the way you touch me. I loved it. I can’t wait to do it again.”

“Me too.” She leaned up and kissed him softly. “I really never knew it could be like this.” She pulled him down and hugged him
close, loving the feel of his skin pressed to hers. She brushed her fingers through his dark hair again and again.

Ben kissed her neck, tilted his head back, and looked her in the eye. “It’s only going to get better.”

She hoped he meant everything in their lives, because right now everything besides the two of them together seemed out of control and unsettled. She longed to stay in this
bed, in his arms, and happy the rest of her life.

Chapter Nineteen

K
ATE STARED UP
at the massive house from the front yard. The deep green grass and cheerful spring flowers didn’t take the edge off the sharp pain in her chest. Instead of the beautiful stone and wood home, all she saw was her sister and Donald lying dead on the floor in pools of crimson blood.

Ben’s hands settled on her shoulders. His body pressed along the
back of hers. His warmth eased the chill running up her spine. His presence made it easier to face going into this place again.

“A part of me thinks I’ll knock on the door and she’ll answer with a smile on her face. She’ll hug me, and I’ll feel that connection we shared that, no matter what, I always have her.”

“I’m sorry, honey. Remember you still have Alex. You have me.”

She placed
her hands over his on her shoulders and took a bolstering breath. He was right. She needed to move on, think of her future with him and Alex. She couldn’t continue to live in this limbo any longer.

She glanced over at the planting bed under the window. “We planted the pansies and ferns when I was pregnant with Alex. We sat in the shade, talking about all our wishes and dreams for him.” She
stared up over her shoulder at Ben. “It was such a good day.”

Ben squeezed her close. “Let’s go in,” Ben coaxed.

“I don’t want to see it again, but I guess I can’t avoid it any longer.”

“Kate, I hired the cleaning crew after the police released the house. The scene is clean.”

“You did?”

“Yes. I couldn’t let you walk back in there and see that again. I know you’ll never forget,
but I could at least do that for you.”

She turned in his arms and hugged him close. “I don’t deserve you.”

“You have to keep me all the same. I’m only happy when I’m with you.”

“That’s sweet. You make a really good boyfriend. I’m surprised no one snatched you up before now.”

“I was waiting for you.” He kissed her on top of the head. He did that a lot. She’d grown to expect it.
She loved it. “Took you long enough to show up.”

“Sorry. I had some things to work out before I got here. I didn’t believe in love until I saw Margo and Donald together. Now I get it. My heart unfroze and opened up when I had Alex. You saw the woman I was before. Distant. Reserved.”

“I remember her. I kissed her once.”

Kate frowned, thinking of the way she acted, running away from
him like that. “It’s probably better this way. Ask any guy I ever dated before you—­I was cold.”

“Can’t. I’d only kill them for touching you.”

She squeezed his middle tighter and smiled against his chest. “Now you’re the only one who gets to touch me.”

“You’re damn right about that.” His hands slid down her back and over her ass. He pulled her close. “You know we can’t stand out here
all day. Stalling won’t change the house or what happened here.”

Kate sucked in a deep breath, squeezed Ben’s sides, and bolstered her strength to let him go and face her past and find a way to move on. She turned and walked up the path to the door and used her key to go in. She stood in the foyer like she did that night and took in the feel of the house. Instead of an ominous vibe, she felt
the emptiness. The void of a happy family living here.

“You know, I never really got a look at this place when I came that night. It’s nice. Open. Bright. Big,” he said from beside her.

“She loved it here. We decorated it together. It seemed so unreal. Her living in this big house. I mean, we grew up with nothing but what we could fit in a suitcase to go to the next foster home, so having
something as grand as this, well, you can imagine we were overwhelmed at first. Then we really got into it. She picked the art on the walls. I picked out the sofas.”

“She was the more artsy, make things pretty person. You’re the practical one.”

Kate nodded. “Yes. Exactly.”

“Donald didn’t help with the decorations.”

“Sure he did. He paid the bills, smiling at Margo like the money
didn’t matter, but seeing her happy meant everything.”

“I know how he feels.” Ben squeezed her hand.

“He’d come in, see us pouring over magazines and fabric swatches and give us this huge indulgent smile and shake his head.

“We laughed over ridiculous patterns that reminded us of things from our past long forgotten and better left in another era. When we’d hit an antique store or some
boutique, we’d ooh and aah over things and bring them home and put them in their perfect spot.”

“I’ve spoken with Donald’s lawyer at length. This house is yours free and clear.”

“You mean it’s Alex’s.”

“No. Yours. Your sister left it to you. You said it yourself—­you helped make this place the beautiful home you both always wanted. She made you a part of this home, included you in
all the decorating decisions, because you were a very important part of her life.”

Kate lived vicariously through her sister whether she wanted to acknowledge it or not. This house had been such a dream. The beauty and hominess they created here was exactly what Kate always wanted for herself. Now, it belonged to her, but how could she keep it?

“I can’t afford to keep this place.” The
sadness engulfed her. She hated to think she’d have to sell the house and lose the tangible evidence of all her memories.

“You can use the money Donald left to Alex.”

“No. That wouldn’t be right. It’s for him.”

“I can afford the taxes and upkeep on this place.” Ben stared down at her.

The softly spoken statement was filled with a longing she felt. Wishful thinking, or a chance
for a real life. A happy life. “Ben . . .”

“Hear me out. I know what I want. To be with you and Alex. I think you want the same thing. My place is fine for now. But it’s small. We’d have to turn the spare room from my office into Alex’s room. I don’t mind, but that means I have to move my office into the living space. I work from home a lot, especially at night. The building I live in is safe
enough, but not really kid friendly. The nearest park is, like, five miles away. Parking sucks in the city.”

“You seriously want to live with me and Alex, here?”

“Yes. You own the house. I pay the monthly expenses. You come to work for me at Haven House as the new director. You can take Alex to work with you every day. Eventually, I give you a ring, you say yes, we get married, and we
raise Alex and however many more kids you’d like to have together.”

Wow. All that. All at once. It overwhelmed her, but settled quickly in her mind, like, “Oh, yeah, that’s what I want too.”

She shook off her jumbled thoughts and focused. “You want me to quit my job and work for you?”

He smiled.

“Why are you smiling?”

“You have no problem with the part where I ask you to marry
me—­you’re worried about your job.”

“Well . . . I . . . I worked hard to get where I am.”

He only smiled more. “Keep your job. Live with me. Make a life with me.”

Kate stared down at the ring Donald gave her sister now sitting on
her
right hand. A promise never fulfilled with a wedding, but enforced every day they were together by the love they shared.

“I don’t need the ring, just
your promise that we will love each other forever.”

Not exactly the “I love you” declaration they’d both avoided until now, but close enough to reinforce they both felt and wanted the same thing.

“I promise, Kate. I swear, I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make you happy.”

“You do make me happy. You’re more than I ever thought possible for my life. You and Alex.”

She scanned
the rooms laid out before her and up the stairs leading to the second floor.

“What do you think? Do you want to live here? If not, we can sell it and buy another place.”

The thought of selling tightened her gut. As much as the ghosts in this place haunted her, they comforted her more. She eyed him, her practical side taking over for her whimsical heart. “You’ll have to commute to work.”

“It’s not that far. If I have you to come home to each night, I don’t mind.”

She took a deep breath and mentally leaped for that happy life her sister had and wished for Kate to embrace too. “Okay. I think this will work.”

“You think? Of course it will work.”

His enthusiasm sparked hers even more. “I’d like to change a few things. Make the house feel more like us, but still have
those things Margo picked out and put together here and in Alex’s room that I can share with him. We’ll make new memories, but I can hold on to some of the old ones too.”

“Whatever you want to do, we’ll make it happen.”

“I’ll move my things from my condo. Sell it. Alex will have his room back. A backyard to play in when he’s bigger. You can set up your office in there.” She pointed to
Donald’s office.

“We’ll get rid of whatever you don’t want. We’ll bring our things here. You’ll have them and us. Right now, it’s just a place with a bad memory. We’ll make it a home again.” Ben wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulled her close, and kissed her on top of the head.

Her heart lightened. She couldn’t wait to live together, here, as a family. She leaned into him, loving
the solid feel of him beside her. She smothered out the nightmare in her mind with dreams of what their life would soon be like.

“So, when do you want to do this?” Kate asked, allowing herself to set aside her pain and look forward to her future.

Ben couldn’t believe this went so well. He thought he’d have to do some fast talking and a whole lot of convincing.

“We can hire a crew to
pack up your place.”

“I think we should go through this one, decide what stays and goes, then we’ll know what to bring from our places. We are definitely bringing your bed.”

That made him laugh. “Well, now that we’ve christened it, we have to bring it.”

“I think that’s the best bed I’ve ever slept in.”

“It’s the last bed you’ll ever sleep in,” he warned, eyeing her.

“Then you
better uphold your best boyfriend status.”

“Is that right? Didn’t I treat you good this morning?”

“We never did eat breakfast.”

“I did.” He winked at her, remembering having her laid out on his kitchen table. He loved the blush that spread from her neck up to light up her cheeks. “You’re so pretty when you’re embarrassed.”

She pressed her hand to her red cheeks. “Stop.”

He
laughed, but inside he recognized those walls she’d erected had come down. He slid his hand behind her neck and pulled her close for a sweet kiss. He loved that they could be like this. Her resilience and strength shined through when she stopped living in the past and her grief and saw their future here in this house. She turned to him to give her strength to see this through. They’d wipe the slate
clean and start building their own memories in this place.

He pulled her close and hugged her tight. His phone rang. He groaned, hating the interruption.

Kate pressed her hands to his chest and leaned back, staring up at him. “It might be Sam. Something about Alex.”

He kissed her forehead, then stood tall and pulled his phone out of his back pocket. He frowned at the caller ID. “It’s
Haven House.” He swiped the screen to accept the call. “Hello.”

“Ben, it’s Jill. You need to come to Haven House now.”

“Whatever it is, can it wait until Monday?”

“Someone tossed a rock through the day care window. There’s glass everywhere.”

“Did anyone get hurt?”

“No. A ­couple of children were in the room, but they’re okay. The cops are on their way.”

“Take the kids outside
and organize a game. I’m on my way.”

Ben stuffed his phone back in his pocket, stared at Kate’s worried face, and at the open rooms around them. He reached out and traced the side of Kate’s face. “More trouble at Haven House.”

Kate grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the door. “Let’s go.”

After a few steps, Ben dug in his heels and held her back. “No. Wait. What if Evan set this
up to get to you? I can’t take you there. What if something happens? I’ll take you back to my place first.”

“Nonsense. I want to help. I need to help. I can’t stand to be cooped up in your place alone another minute. I’m not letting you go there alone. You said we stick together. We face whatever happens together.”

“I don’t want anything else to happen to you.”

“I took care of myself
the last time. I can do so again if I have to, but I won’t, because you’ll be with me.”

“Stay here. Lock the door. Turn on the security system. I’ll call Sam to come and get you. Better yet, I’ll drop you at his place in the city before I go to Haven House. You can stay with him and see Alex.”

“No. Alex is safe with Sam. If Evan’s coming for me, I’m not leading him to Alex.”

Kate held
the door wide, waiting for him to make up his mind. Everything in him wanted to make her stay here—­better yet, lock her away somewhere out of state, out of Evan’s reach. Ludicrous. Evan wouldn’t stop. Not until she was dead and the Faradays took everything. He needed to settle the estate, get everything into Kate and Alex’s name, and end this madness.