Everything: A Singed Wings Novel (31 page)

My inquisitive gaze cut over to Mr. Carroll, back to Alice, then finally landed on my teacher. “Fiancée?” I asked. “Why didn’t you tell any of us you were engaged, Mr. C? When did you pop the question?”
And what the hell happened to you and Belle?

“Just last Sunday,” he answered, his entire face radiating with happiness as he peered down at her. “It’s all been a bit of a whirlwind. We actually met back in January, when I was out on a first date with someone else, but she ended up getting sick at this place we were at, and as I hung out at the bar waiting for her, Alice and I ended up talking and really hitting it off.” He shook his head, almost as if he couldn’t believe it himself. “I know that sounds terrible, but I knew much earlier in the night that the date wasn’t going to work out, and I’ve since told the woman I was out with, who is now a great friend, what happened. She thought it was hilarious and has been one of our biggest cheerleaders. Actually helped me pick out Alice’s ring.”

The blonde woman beamed as she held her hand up to show me the sparkling rock. But I was still having trouble processing Mr. Carroll’s words. “So you and Belle aren’t together?” I blurted out, not even thinking about the ramifications of me calling her “Belle” or knowing about their date.

They both snickered as Liam shook his head. “No,
Ms. Sloan
and I are just friends,” he said, lifting his eyebrows as he said her name the way I should have. “But how did you know who I was talking about?”

Shit. My stupid big-ass mouth.

“I overheard her talking one day to some other teacher at lunch, and I’d just assumed.” I played it off with a casual shrug, although my thoughts were spinning chaotically.

Had I misinterpreted what I’d witnessed that day by her car? Was it possible that he was just consoling her as a friend because of everything that had happened with the Jonah debacle? And because of that, I’d never apologized? Just left her thinking I viewed her as a lying, manipulative bitch… which was probably why she thought I never came back to her class?

You’ve gotta be fucking kidding me.

“Well, congrats to you both. I wish y’all the best,” I ended the awkward silence, then looked off to the side and made up the fastest excuse I could to get out of there. “I think I see my family right over there, so I better get going. I’ll see y’all around.”

Mr. Carroll nodded hesitantly then congratulated me again as I took off in a near-jog toward where I’d parked my truck. I didn’t have time to try to find my parents before I left, as I was sure everybody and their grandma was trying to meet and get a picture with my dad, and we had to be on an airplane in four hours on our way to California. I had an apology speech to deliver that couldn’t wait another minute. Fuck the graduation.

Breaking almost every traffic law possible, I hauled ass to Belle’s apartment, hoping and praying she’d be there. My knuckles turned a purplish-white as I gripped the wheel and sped down the inner-loop streets of Houston, desperate to get to her. I wasn’t sure what it’d fix or what would happen after; I just knew I couldn’t leave without telling her how sorry I was, what a dipshit I’d been, and that I still loved her.

God, did I still love her.

Less than ten minutes after I left the auditorium, I came to a screeching stop in front of her garage apartment and threw my door open, sprinting up the stairs to her front porch. I was so focused on what all I had to say to her that I didn’t even notice her car wasn’t there.

“Belle? Are you here?” I shouted, as I pounded repeatedly on the front door, my heart thumping wildly in my heaving chest. “It’s me! I need to talk to you! Please! Open the door, Belle! It’s important!”

I continued to knock and yell for I don’t know how long until an older woman yelled out to me from the house next door, “Excuse me! Hey, you! What do you think you’re doing? Get off my property before I call the police!”

Snapping my neck over to her, I held my hands up to show I meant no harm. “I’m sorry, ma’am. Didn’t mean to bother you,” I called back. “I’m just trying to find the young lady who lives here, Belle Sloan. It’s very important I talk to her. Have you seen her around today?”

“Yeah, she dropped her keys off and told me goodbye just a couple hours ago.”

“Goodbye?!” I shouted, quickly moving down the stairs and over to where she stood near her front flowerbed. “Where was she going? On summer vacation? Do you know when she’ll be back?”

The woman narrowed her eyes on me and crossed her arms over her chest. “No, boy. She’s gone gone. Like moved away gone.” Then, glancing over at my truck, realization lit up her face. “You haven’t been coming ‘round here anymore. I thought maybe that’s why she wanted to leave. To forget about you.”

“Probably, I was an asshole,” I admitted, with a curt nod, “but that’s why I’m here. I have to tell her I fu
—messed up. And that I’m sorry. And that I love her.”

She curled her nose up at me and shook her head. “Well, your timing is shitty, and I have no idea where she moved to. She told me she’d stop by to pick up her mail in a couple of weeks, so I’m assuming she’s staying local, but that’s all I know. Good luck to you.”

Spinning around, she marched back inside her house as I stood in the front yard, on the verge of an emotional breakdown.
I dug my phone out of my back pocket and tried to call her, hoping by some crazy chance that she’d pick up, but I received an error message before it ever rang, saying the number I’d called had been disconnected.
Of course it had.
A knot formed in the back of my throat as I trudged over to my truck and got in, cursing under my breath the entire way.

This could not be fucking happening. Not right before I was supposed to fucking leave for the next nine or ten months. There was no damn way I could get on that plane without talking to her first.

“EVERETT, I UNDERSTAND
you’re upset, but there’s not a later flight out tonight and we’re due in the label’s office at nine tomorrow morning,” my dad huffed, as he carried his and my mom’s luggage outside to the Suburban.

I followed hot on his heels as he crossed the front yard, refusing to give up. “What if there’s one early tomorrow morning and I can just join you guys right before the meeting? I’ll take a cab to the hotel or wherever you are. Come on, Dad. I promise I won’t miss the meeting. Just give me the night to try and find her. I really need to do this before I go. I swear I won’t let you down.”

Utter desperation had set in. I didn’t have the first clue how to try to find Belle, but I couldn’t just give up. Not telling her how I felt would be a regret I lived with for the rest of my life.

“I’m sorry, son, but the answer is no. And there is nothing you can say or do to change my mind about this unless you’re willing to forfeit going on tour.” He dropped the suitcases on the ground at the back of the SUV then fixed his steel gray stare on me. “If anything were to happen tomorrow, like bad weather or a broken-down plane or anything else, and you didn’t make the meeting tomorrow, that would be it for you. Done. Finished. These aren’t the kind of people you no-show on. They’ve got millions of dollars invested in this tour, and if you show them you’re not taking it seriously, then they’re not gonna take you seriously. There are a thousand other bands that are good enough to open for this show, and I can guaran-fuckin’-tee you that they wouldn’t take the chance of missing something as important as this. So I need to know right now what it’s gonna be. Are you all in or are you out?”

The answer should’ve been a no-brainer. I hadn’t talked to Belle in over two months. For all I knew, she hated my guts and never wanted to see me again, whether I was apologizing or not. And that was assuming I could even find her in this city of over six-million people. Making music was my life, my dream. I was damn good at writing songs and even better at performing them. And if I played my cards right and continued to grow and push myself, I knew I could make a killing in the industry.

Yet despite all of that, I still found myself hesitating to reply.

As if he recognized the internal battle I was fighting, he stepped closer to me and rested a comforting hand on my shoulder, his expression and tone relaxing. “I’m not trying to be a dick, Everett. I believe that you love the girl, I really do. But you need to be smart about this. Rash and thoughtless actions are what started this mess to begin with. Why don’t you get to LA and get on the bus then spend some time adjusting to your new life before making any serious decisions? If things are meant to be with you and Belle, it’ll find a way to work itself out. Just like with me and Mom. We always found a way to fly back to each other.”

Wanting so much to believe in what he said, praying I was doing the right thing, I nodded and forced a smile. “I’m all in, Dad.”

A couple of hours later, I was already questioning my decision.
My emotions pulled me in eight different directions at once, but there I sat on the stupid plane with my dad next to me, signing autographs, of course, for random people who passed by. I knew he’d chosen the seat next to me for emotional support, but I would’ve much rather Ashlynn been there so I would’ve been left alone. I was so mentally exhausted I just wanted the plane to get in the air and then I would try to focus on the in-flight movie and maybe a bag of peanuts. My insides were filled with tears, but I didn’t dare let one seep out.

Closing my eyes as I waited for the rest of the people to board, I leaned back in my chair and rested my head against the side of the plane, passing out without even realizing it. When we hit a bit of turbulence, I was startled awake with lyrics repeating themselves over and over in my head.

“Dad, I need my notebook and a pen. This song came to me while I was asleep. It’s exploding inside my head,” I murmured to him.

As he scrambled to his feet and grabbed my carry-on from the compartment above, I leaned over and got Ashlynn’s attention from across the aisle. “Hey sis, what was that melody you were humming in the airport earlier?”

She smiled and shrugged casually. “Just something I’ve been playing with. I haven’t quite figured it out yet.”

“Come here. I think I got it,” I urged as I lifted up the armrest between mine and Dad’s seat to make room for her to squish between us. Looking as excited as I felt, she quickly moved over.

Dad handed me what I needed and I furiously jotted it down what I had, using some of the techniques Mr. Carroll had taught me to finish up the last couple of stanzas and pull it all together.

“Alright,” I nodded at her, “start humming it and I’ll join in with the lyrics.”

Ashlynn naturally knew where I wanted her to break and pick back up, and as Dad watched and listened to us harmonizing together, his gray eyes big with wonder, he lowered his tray table and began tapping out the beat. We had our own little jam session going on in first class.

It took us a couple of times of trial and error to get it perfect, but just before the plane touched down in California, we ran through the entire thing flawlessly, and as the final lyrics fell from my mouth in a hushed whisper, a single tear rolled down my cheek.

The song was done. I could only hope Belle and I weren’t.

I UNLOADED THE
groceries weighing my arms down on the counter with a huff, exhausted from lugging the bags up two flights of stairs in the stifling summer heat. If this was what mid-June was like in Houston, I was afraid August might just melt me. Delaying the inevitable task of having to put the food away, I pulled the mail out of the bag I’d stuffed it in and thumbed through the stack of bills and junk advertisements, when my fingers grazed an envelope with a return address I never expected to see.