Everybody Knows (10 page)

Chapter 9 - Lockdown

“What in the actual fuck?” Ellie shrieked, shoving her iPad in my face as my eyelids fluttered open.

“What?” I mumbled. “Go away.”

I tried to pull my duvet over my head but she tugged it away from me and thrust her iPad towards me again. I blinked a few times, trying to work out where I was, what time it was, and why my sister was flipping out.

Prague. We had to be in Prague by now. There was daylight outside, so it was maybe… Hell, I had no idea.

I turned onto my side and as my eyes focused on her iPad screen, I let out a shriek of my own.

This cannot be happening again.

But it was. Just like the year before when the papers had gone batshit over Drew and Jason’s feud, and Ellie had gotten dragged in the middle of it, this time it was my turn to make the news.

Jason and I hadn’t been as alone as I’d thought the night before, and our kiss was now a headline story on one of the leading entertainment websites.

Oh, wow. I’d been so rudely awoken I hadn’t had time to revel in the fact that Jason and I were officially… something. An item. Albeit a very new and slightly tentative one. That fluttery sensation I’d felt when he kissed me returned at the memory and I had to fight a smile, because although there was plenty to smile about, having it appear in the news was not good at all.

“Yeah,” I began. “Ellie, I have something to tell you.”

Her eyebrows shot upwards. “Lucy, this isn’t funny!”

“Do I look like I’m laughing?” I shoved the duvet away from me, and hopped out of my bunk.

“What the hell did you do?”

I pointed at the screen; did I really need to say it out loud?

Ellie blew out a breath. “Okay, we need to fix this immediately because as soon as Mum and Dad see this, they’re going to call and you need something to tell them. In fact, the faster we sort this, the faster you can call them before they read it in the paper.”

She looked frantic, her hair in disarray. I saw it was only nine am, which meant it was only eight in the UK. Hopefully my parents hadn’t checked the news just yet.

“Wait,” I said. “What do you mean ‘fix this’?”

“Damage control. We need to call Derek and get this crap resolved before it gets out of hand.”

Crap? Me kissing Jason was crap?

“Ellie, stop talking. I need to think, okay? And I need to talk to Jason.”

“You need to stay away from Jason or Mum and Dad will have your ass flown home!”

“I’m not a child! I can make decisions for myself, and right now, I need five minutes to myself.”

I pushed past her to the communal area which was, thankfully, empty. I was surprised Ellie’s yelps hadn’t dragged everyone from their bunks, though if they knew what was smart, they’d stay where they were and listen from a distance. This was about to get messy.

I didn’t need to read the news story Ellie had tried to show me. I knew what it said because I knew how tabloids worked. Two people kissing. A rock star, and his brother’s girlfriend’s baby sister. Brother’s
fiancee
. Shit. Me kissing Jason had made higher ranking news than Drew’s proposal, which was pretty messed up. This wasn’t just a story about a stranger. I was known to the Razes Hell world because of photos on social media. They knew who I was. How old I was. How I was a family friend of the Brooks’. This was a shit storm we didn’t need, and we should have known so much better than to figure out our personal lives in the open air, but as far as we knew, we were alone. More alone than we’d have been with prying eyes and ears inside the bus – or so we’d thought.

I should have panicked, but the thing that coursed through my veins more than anything was fear. The Razes Hell fans would – mostly – be supportive, but it was the rest of the world I was concerned about. The judgements. And they wouldn’t be on me, they’d be on Jason. Angry as I was with Ellie, she was right. We needed to limit the damage, but how? There was only one way. To pass the kiss off as a mistake, and never let it happen again.

As always, I felt Jason’s presence before he spoke, and I said, “Please don’t say it.”

“Say what?”

I looked up at him and my heart leapt . His shirt was off, displaying the array of tattoos across his chest, and his hair was messy.

God, please don’t let this be over before it’s begun. Please. I really don’t ask for much.

“That we have to tell everyone we were drunk and that we can’t see each other anymore.”

Jason paced over and sat beside me. When he put his arm around me and pulled me into him, a little of the stress dropped away. I felt his warmth through my thin cami top, and I snuggled into him, dropping my head onto his shoulder.

“That’s not what I want to do,” he said. “We do need to figure something out though. Ellie is about ready to rip my head off, Luce. She made Drew go out for a walk before he hit me. I’m surprised you didn’t hear the shouting.”

“I heard nothing until Ellie shoved her iPad in my face.” I looked up at him. “What did they say to you?”

“Nothing I haven’t heard before. I’m selfish, inconsiderate, reckless. An all-round asshole.”

I wanted to tell him he was none of those things. That they didn’t know anything, and they didn’t understand. But I didn’t want to sound like a cheesy song written by a teeny bopper. Instead I placed my hand on his, hoping he knew how I felt. When he squeezed my hand, I knew he did.

“What did you tell them about us?” I asked.

“I tried to tell them that we’d like some privacy to find our way through this. And that that’s what Derek should tell the press. That right now, we’re only just starting something and we’d appreciate less intrusion. Drew and Ellie think we need to end this now.”

“Maybe we should wait and see what the reaction is. I can handle Ellie and Drew, and even Mum and Dad. They know us and love us and they will come around. Hopefully. But the rest of the world? That is a lot of people saying bad things. And I’m sure my priorities should be the other way around but there’s a lot of hate out there, just waiting to be thrown at someone. That’s hard to get over, and it could kill the band if it gets out of control.”

His face paled and that scared me more than anything. I knew he hadn’t thought that far ahead, even though he probably should have. I might have meant something to him, but compared to his career? Nope. I couldn’t compete with that, and I wouldn’t. I didn’t want to lose him when I’d barely even got him, but I wouldn’t let him sacrifice his career for me either.

“You’re right,” he said. “I’ll talk to Derek and I’ll tell him the truth, but let’s leave any announcements until we’ve got a better grip on what people are saying.”

“I should call my parents too. Now. Ellie and Drew can wait since you’ve already given them an explanation.”

Jason nodded. “We’ll sort this, Luce. We will.”

“I know.”

What I didn’t know was whether it would have a good outcome.

Jason’s lips began to curve upwards as he looked at me, and for a few moments, the drama disappeared. I raised my head and my lips were so ready for his. His mouth brushed against mine in a kiss that stirred all my senses again.

I will not let this go. I will fight with everything I have to make the bad stuff go away.

“Lucy.” Ellie’s voice broke the moment, and I tried hard not to glare at her as I turned around. “We really need to talk.”

Without a word, I rose to my feet, but placed another kiss on Jason’s cheek before I followed Ellie down towards the front of the bus. She still buzzed with anger, but somewhere in the depths of her eyes I saw the tiniest hint of understanding.

“I hate this, Lucy,” she said with a sigh. “I hate it. I know Jason is what you want, and I want you to be happy but…” she trailed off, shaking her head. “I’m not okay with this. I want to throttle him right now.”

“This isn’t his fault, Ellie. It’s not about fault. It’s about two people who like each other. That’s it. That’s all. It’s not for the world to go nuts about. It’s not their business. It’s not even your business, or Drew’s or Mum and Dad’s. This is about me. It’s about Jason. And everyone else needs to back off.”

Ellie ran her hands through her hair and she shook her head. “Mum and Dad are going to flip.”

“Why? Oh God, please tell me you didn’t discuss this with them too.”

“Of course I didn’t, but you know what Mum’s like. You can’t hide anything from her. She knows how you feel about Jason, and yeah, I’m sure that was one of her concerns before you left.”

“Why are you all so down on him? For people who are supposed to be his friends, you act like he’s the worst person in the world.”

“It’s not that, Lucy. Come on, you know how much I love Jason but I love you more. And this scares me. You and him. I just… I’m scared for you.”

“Why? What about it scares you so much? You think I haven’t seen him at his worst?”

“You
haven’t
seen him at his worst. When he was at his worst, he wasn’t allowed in our house because you were too young to-”

I held my hands up. “Just stop! I’m sorry for what you went through back then, but that was a long time ago. Things aren’t the same as they were then, and if you can’t see that, I don’t have anything else to say to you.”

I pushed past her and headed back to my bunk – literally the only place I could be on my own since I didn’t trust that the paparazzi weren’t already outside waiting.

My heart thudded furiously, and I felt a little lightheaded from all that had happened in the short space of time since I’d woken up. This was a gigantic screw up. Perhaps Ellie and I were cursed when it came to relationships – particularly relationships with the Brooks brothers. Just over a year ago, when she got with Drew, there was another media storm, not because they were dating, but because of the way it came about. My hopefully-soon-to-be relationship with Jason was equally as dramatically revealed, if not more so because of the fact he was ten years older than me.

With a sigh, I picked up my phone and called my mum’s mobile before I could freak out and hide away from it all. I hoped to God that she hadn’t turned the TV on yet.

Thankfully, she hadn’t, which gave me a chance to calmly explain what had happened. I couldn’t stop my tears as I tried to justify what had happened, even though I didn’t feel like I should have needed to. I sobbed my heart out when I told her how Ellie had reacted.

“Lucy.” Mum’s voice was as wobbly as mine. Partly, I knew, it was because she couldn’t stand to hear me upset, but it wasn’t just that. She was as concerned as Ellie and Drew. “Listen to me, darling. I know you think Jason is what you want, but you have to ask yourself if being with him is worth all of the fuss it’s going to cause. And has already caused by the sound of it.”

“Why do people keep talking to me like I’m stupid? Mum, please. Why can’t you understand how much thought I’ve put into this? And I don’t just mean daydreaming, and imagining my wedding day. I mean real thought. I get that this is complicated and it could all end in a massive disaster but isn’t that true of all relationships? Aren’t they all a bit risky?”

“Yes. But not
this
risky.”

Our conversation was interrupted as I heard my dad bellowing my mum’s name in the background.

“Hold on, Lucy,” she said, and I waited while she went to see what had made him shout. “Oh my God.”

“What?”

“You’re on TV. You and Jason have sparked a discussion on breakfast television about age gaps in relationships.”

Oh, for goodness sake. Had this not been about me, I would have laughed. The power of social media, and the media in general, was crazy. Were they really so desperate for news and hot topics of discussion that age gap relationships were their big concern? What about the immigration crisis? What about homelessness, and murder, and all the other issues plaguing the world?

For the first time in my life, I questioned my desire to be a journalist. My parents had paid ridiculous amounts of money for me to study at university, and for what? So I could turn into one of those gossip-hungry animals who interfered in other people’s lives? Realistically, I knew I didn’t have to be that kind of reporter, but in that moment, I hated everything about my chosen career.

“Lovely.” The sarcasm in my tone was clear. “And how’s that going down?”

“That’s not important. Lucy, I can’t handle this and I’m not sure you can either. I don’t want to see my daughter on the television with people debating whether or not you are dating a pervert.”

“What?” I screeched. “You have got to be kidding me?”

“I’m not kidding. He’s almost thirty and you’re a teenager. How do you think that looks?”

I pressed the end call button on my phone and turned it off, ignoring the string of tweets and texts that had come through overnight.

A pervert? Really? I could guarantee that if I’d been just two, or maybe even one year older, people would have been a whole lot less judgmental but the “teen” part of my age made everything messier.

**

The rest of the day was nothing short of ridiculous. The whole band, including Ellie and I, were on lockdown in the bus. Anything we needed was gathered for us by roadies. Derek had got the first plane to Prague, and insisted the show was cancelled but Jason was adamant it would go ahead. It wasn’t fair to cancel because of the craziness in his personal life.