Everybody Has Those Thoughts So It Doesn't Mean You're Gay

This book has been reviewed positively by Child Care Experts!

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EVERYBODY HAS THOSE THOUGHTS

SO IT DOESN’T MEAN YOU’RE GAY

 
by

Cristian YoungMiller

RateABull

Books

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Published By:

RateABull Publishing

Copyright
©
2010 by Cristian YoungMiller

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The characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

Copyright © 2010 by Cristian YoungMiller

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review. For information contact Cristian YoungMiller at [email protected].

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Book Design by Cristian YoungMiller

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Dedication:

To everyone who is having a hard time figuring out where they fit in.

*****

1

Jack was very sad. He was so sad that he didn’t even realize he was crying.

Jack rocked himself back and forth on the swing in his backyard. It was the swing that he and his friends hadn’t used since they were 12. The only reason why Jack, now 13 years old, had returned was because it helped to lessen his sadness.

Jack’s dad, dressed like how a doctor dressed when they came home from work, entered the backyard. Jack’s dad slowly walked over to the swing set and sat on the swing next to Jack.

“Bad day, kiddo?” Jack’s dad asked.

Jack didn’t want to talk so he just nodded his head yes.

“You know, when I have a bad day, I always talk to your mom about it. And when your mom has a bad day, she always talks to me about it. We always feel better once we do. Do you want to talk to me about your day? I promise you’ll feel better afterwards.”

“Billy and Sandy called me gay,” Jack said, very upset.

“Well that wasn’t very nice of your friends. But you know, it isn’t a bad thing to be gay.”

“But I’m not gay,” Jack said loudly.

“Ok.” Jack’s father looked back at the house. “When I was a kid, the kids in my school used to call me soft. Even back then I knew that there was nothing wrong with being soft. A lot of people prefer to be soft. In fact, now I actually prefer to work with people who are soft.”

“Is it because you are soft, dad?”

“Ummm, maybe.” Jack’s father said, looking over at his son, a bit surprised. “My point is, what’s so great about being hard? Nothing. And what’s so bad about being soft? Nothing.

But the thing wasn’t so much about the words that they used, as much as it was about how they said it. When they called me soft, I knew that they said it to try and hurt me. And because I knew that they were trying to hurt me, it did hurt me. So for your friends to call you gay for no reason, even if there’s nothing wrong with being gay, must make you feel bad.”

“Yeah,” Jack said, not feeling any better.

Jack and his father were quiet for a while as they both rocked themselves back and forth on the swing.

“But what if they weren’t saying it in a mean way?” Jack asked his dad.

“What, do you mean they weren’t yelling when they said it?”

“Yeah,” Jack quietly said back.

“Just because someone doesn’t yell something, doesn’t mean that it wasn’t meant to hurt you. And you can always tell if someone is saying something to hurt you, no matter how nicely they seem to say it.”

“Yeah, but what if they had a reason to say it?” Jack asked, looking at the ground in front of him.

“What reason could they possibly have for calling you gay?” Jack’s dad asked, confused.

“I don’t know.”

“Well, there’s nothing wrong with being gay. But if someone is saying something about you that isn’t true, it’s not right, no matter what it is.”

“Yeah,” Jack said, with less energy than usual. “But, what if they had a reason to call me that?”

“Why, did something happen?” Jack’s dad asked again.

“No,” Jack said before looking away.

Both sat on the swing quietly for another second.

 “Have you ever heard of the game, Truth or Dare?” Jack asked, breaking the silence.

“Sure, why? What happened?”

“Umm,” Jack looked at his dad, trying to find the courage. “Can we go somewhere else to talk about this?”

“Why don’t we head inside?” Jack’s dad suggested.

“No.”

“Ok, then how about we take a trip to the mini-golf course and you can try and beat me at a round of mini-golf?”

Jack’s eyes lit up. He liked miniature golf. It was something that he considered himself to be very good at. He had always been able to beat Billy and Sandy at it. The only person that he hadn’t yet beaten was his dad. But even though the results were always the same when playing his dad, he still loved the challenge.

“Yeah, let’s do it.”

*****

2

Jack entered his bedroom, excitedly looking for his lucky mini-golf outfit. Just after he found it and was about to put it on, his bedroom door swung open.

“Mom, Cindy came into my room without knocking again!” Jack yelled past Cindy.

“Cindy, please knock before going into your brother’s room. And Jack, please lock the door if you’re changing. We put a lock on the door for a reason,” Jack’s mom yelled back.

“Are you going somewhere?” Jack’s little sister asked him.

“I’m gonna play mini-golf with dad, not that it’s any of your business.”

“I want to go,” Cindy said in a high pitched whine.

“You can’t come,” Jack replied sharply. “Now get out.”

“It’s not up to you anyway.” Cindy walked out of the room and yelled to their dad. “Daddy, can I come to play mini-golf?”

Jack closed the door behind Cindy and locked it.

“Please, can I come?” Cindy said in a very loud voice.

Jack changed into his lucky mini-golf outfit and went looking for his putter. As he did he heard a quick jiggle of the door knob, followed by a bang. Those would be the exact sounds of a little sister walking into a locked bedroom door and then falling to the ground.

“Mom, Jack locked his bedroom door and I can’t get in,” Jack heard his little sister yell.

As Jack looked through his closet he could hear his little sister knocking on the door.

“Jack, can I please come with you?”

“No,” Jack replied back without stopping his search.

“Pleeeease.”

“No, now go away,” Jack said without looking back.

After finding the putter Jack unlocked his door to find that Cindy was gone. He then went into the living room and waited for his dad.

“Ok, ready?” Jack’s dad asked as he entered the living room.

“Yep.”