Ever: The Ever Trilogy, Book One (Volume 1) (23 page)

The girl from the library stood next to Toby and laced her fingers in his, prompting my stomach to do a somersault. I’d only had half a soda, but I felt like that little bit would be making a comeback soon. I dropped Scott’s hand, unable to inflict the same pain in Toby as this girl inflicted in me. Whether he cared for me or not, I could be the bigger person. Toby pulled his hand away then shoved it in his pocket.

The girl stuck out her now-free hand. I tore my eyes away from Toby’s and found myself staring at her long, red-tipped fingers as if they were attached to an alien.
Which they very well could be.
I shuddered. I was suddenly very aware of the chipped black polish on my nails as I reluctantly returned her handshake.

“Hi! I’m Ariadne. Are you guys friends of Tobias’?” She addressed all of us, but her eyes never left mine.

Tobias.
She said his name like they’d known each other forever. I’d only overheard his dad call him Tobias. I felt that ball of jealousy churn a little more in my gut, growing ever larger and harder to ignore as I looked at her standing in front of me, holding Toby’s hand. The hand I should be holding.

Used to hold, Ever. Past tense. The hand I
used
to hold.

With her hair down, I saw it mirrored mine in length and color. But that’s where the similarities stopped. It was beautiful and lustrous, that perfect blue-black shining like it had just been polished. It hung elegantly over one shoulder, every hair in place—with not a single flyaway or broken piece that I could see. I felt my hand reach up to smooth my hair, my self-conscious habit popping up at the most inopportune time. She had perfect skin so pale it reminded me of a porcelain doll. It was so beautiful next to her dark hair and yellow eyes.

I hate her.

Her lips were big and full, which I hadn’t noticed at the library—probably because I’d had no need to analyze her then, not knowing she was
with
Toby.
Ugh.
Tonight she had on a dark, glossy red lipstick that gave her mouth a look of pouting, but not in a bratty toddler way. Oh no, this was a very sexual pout.

I
really
hate her.

I found myself comparing the two of us. It’s only natural. Looking back at Toby, I wondered what he ever saw in me.

Jessie’s elbow connected with my side, reminding me that the girl had been speaking to me. I tore my gaze away from Toby and looked back at her, trying to recall what she’d said. She was looking at me with a glint of curiosity in her eyes, her amusement apparent.
What had she asked me? Friends of Tobias.
Her voice floated through my mind.
Oh yeah.
Friends.

“Well, no, I guess not. We
used
to be, um,
friends
. Not anymore.” I snuck a sideways glance at Toby when I said it but didn’t linger on his face for long. Looking at him was too painful.

She had a good five years on me, I could tell—a good five inches, too. She stood with pride, as if she knew everything there was to know about life—and about Toby too, I imagined. Her confidence, much like Jessie’s, was almost palpable.

I am so out of my league.

“Um, anyway, hi. I’m Ever.”

“Oh! Is this
the
Ever!? I’ve heard so much about you! It’s such a pleasure to finally meet you!”

The words were pleasant enough—if not completely confusing—and her voice was sweet as she spoke them, but there was something unmistakable in her eyes, an anger lurking just beyond the surface.
She must know I’m his ex, then.
I wondered if it was any coincidence I’d run into her at the library earlier, but I wasn’t going to be the one to mention it. She’d probably been checking me out to see if I was competition. Seeing her now, all done up for her date with Toby, I highly doubted she had anything to worry about.

“Um, well it’s nice to meet you, too, Ariad—”

“
Air-ee-add-knee
,” she said, pronouncing each syllable as if I was some kind of idiot.

“Yeah, I got it. You’re named after a Greek goddess or something, right?”

Of course she is. How terribly fitting.

“Oh great! Most people have
no
idea how to pronounce my name. It’s so frustrating! I’d rather have a simple, easy name like yours. Is it short for something?” She paused, waiting for a response, but I gave her none. “Well, anyway, you can just call me Ari. That’s what Tobias calls me, and since you’re a friend of his … .” She trailed off then, looking at him and nuzzling her nose against his neck.

His jaw twitched slightly, and my stomach churned.

“You look so familiar, Ever. Have we met somewhere before?”

She was toying with me now, the glint in her eyes daring me to talk about our chance meeting at the library. What I didn’t know was
why.

I stood there like an idiot, not knowing what to say. I was getting really good at that.

“So, did you guys like the band? I’ve known the drummer for ages.”

Ah. So that’s why they’re here.
Just my luck that I’d go to a high school party with a bunch of high school kids I didn’t know, and Toby—who was definitely not in high school—would just happen to be there with his hot new girlfriend because she would just happen to be friends with the band. Of course.

PS. Your friend’s band sucks.

I watched her reclaim Toby’s hand in hers as she nuzzled closer to him. The muscles in his jaw tensed again as she did so, and I figured he was at least a
little
uncomfortable in front of me.

Good.
Asshole.

As angry as I was trying to be, that ball of pain and jealous energy was grinding away at my insides, and I felt myself start to waver just a bit, my knees growing weak. I couldn’t take my eyes away from his eyes boring into mine and threatening to swallow me up into those beautiful sapphire pools. Jessie must have sensed it because she grabbed my hand and pulled me back the way we’d come. As we walked away, she turned back to Ariadne.

“Well, it was just
fantastic
to meet you,
AU-ree-ANNA
. But we were just leaving, so we will just
have
to get together some other time. Enjoy the party!” Purposely mispronouncing her name, Jessie left her with the most deliciously evil smile I’d
ever
seen her turn on anyone. Moments like this were why I adored my best friend.

She pulled me through the crowd, stopping only once—to watch with wide eyes as a side of me she’d never seen before pushed its way to the surface … I grabbed a freshly poured beer out of the hand of one of the partygoers and chugged it until it was gone.

Yuck.
I don’t know what I was thinking.

I don’t even know what happened to Scott after that—I didn’t look back the whole time. Heck, I was barely even looking forward. I let Jessie lead me to the car, Greg’s hand resting supportively on my back the entire way.

Once we were inside Greg’s yellow beast, Jessie let all her anger out in a rush.

“Oh. My. God! Some people! It’s only been
four weeks
since you guys broke up!
Four weeks
! What a
dirtbag!
And he hasn’t even called you! Oh my god! I am
so
pissed right now! What a
dick
. And I can’t believe he would show up to a high school party! I mean, gross, how old is he? And how old is
she
? Like
thirty-five
or something? Who cares if you know the band! Ugh! Did you even see what she was wearing? I mean, my gosh, have some class—”

“Jessie,
stop
. I’m sure Ever would like to ride home in peace, babe.”

Ah, thank you, Greg.

I
did
want to ride home in peace. I appreciated Jessie’s anger, but sometimes … sometimes you just don’t want to hear it. Sometimes you just want to … wallow in your misery. Quietly.

Alone.

And for the record, I
had
seen what she was wearing, which only fueled my insecurities about my curves. She was tall and thin with legs for days like Jessie, and if I thought her outfit at the library screamed high-fashion magazine, the purple dress she’d worn tonight showed off her insanely long legs and screamed
Victoria’s Secret Catalogue
. Or maybe
Frederick’s
. I imagined Toby running his hand up one of those legs … and then I imagined them wrapped around him …
Ugh.
Thanks to my vivid imagination, and the whole cup of beer, I was definitely going to be sick soon.

I didn’t say a word the rest of the ride home, and thankfully, neither did Jessie or Greg. They also spared me from their usually frequent displays of affection.

Thank God for small favors.

W
hen we pulled up in front of my house, there was a car in the driveway that didn’t belong.

Ugh.

Seeing the car when I did, and coming to the same conclusion as I was, Jessie turned around to face me in the back seat.

“Hey, Ev, do you want to come out with Greg and me for a while instead? Maybe get some late-night pie at Denny’s or something? Or, we could just go to my house, just you and me? Have a sleepover?”

Though I appreciated my best friend’s attempts, I wanted nothing more than to be alone. Why oh why did my mom decide
this
was the night to suddenly wake up from her depression and have friends over? I hoped that Frankie wasn’t hiding out in
my
room while my mom’s visitors were there. I didn’t really want to see him.

I just shook my head in response to Jessie and got out of the car. Jessie rolled down the window before they drove away and shouted, “Call me later, Ev. Seriously,
any
time, okay? I’ll come back if you want me to.”

“So will I,” Greg shouted from behind the wheel.

I waved my hand behind me as I walked toward the house, too drained to respond with words. A glance to the side showed me that Toby’s driveway was still empty and his house was dark.
Maybe he’s never been out of town after all. Maybe he’s been here all along and I just haven’t seen him coming and going. Maybe he’s been staying somewhere else, with Ariadne.
That thought made my stomach turn over again, and I stopped to take a deep breath, tears silently cascading down my cheeks once more.

When I looked inside the front window of my house, I saw Bonnie and Sharon—our neighbors, and my mom’s two closest friends. Mom was crying, and both women had matching looks of concern and pity on their faces as they rubbed her shoulders and drank their tea. I figured they were trying to pull her out of her funk, and I was happy about that. Well, as happy as I could be when my own funk was all I could think of.

I decided that the last thing I wanted to deal with was my mom and her friends questioning me about my tears. They would probably assume it was because of my dad’s death, which would then lead to trying to console me, which would then lead to making me even more upset. And probably also annoyed.

Even if I
could
somehow make it through the house undetected by my mom and her friends, if Frankie saw me … saw my face like this … and my tears … .

No, I definitely had to avoid seeing any of them tonight.

So, I headed for the side yard and hoped I could sneak into my window undetected. I’d seen Toby pull off the screen and figured it couldn’t be
too
difficult.

Once I was adequately frustrated by the near-impossible task of replacing the screen from the inside, I finally gave up, sliding the glass part of the window closed. Sure there was some trick to it but too irritated to care, I sat down on my bed, pulled my knees up to my face, and cried.

All this time I’d been hoping Toby would come back, that he’d apologize and everything would be okay, that he’d tell me he loved me and we’d go back to the way we were before the accident. I’d talked myself out of my anger—well most of it anyway—and I just wanted a boyfriend again.

And all this time, he’d been with someone else.

How could I be so stupid?

She was so much older than me and so pretty—so confident. It was really no wonder. To make matters worse, they had obviously talked about me.

“
Oh, is this
the
Ever?”

So what had he said about me? Was his relationship with me just a big joke that they liked to laugh about?

“Oh Ari, remember that little girl I dated before you? She was such a loser!”

“Hahahahaa, Tobias! How could you even stand it?”

I was heartbroken. And embarrassed. And confused.

And Toby was at my window.

I heard the light rapping on my window at the same moment I saw his face looking in.
God he’s gorgeous.
Even in my anger, my stupid heart skipped a beat at the sight of him. I wiped my tears on the sleeve of my hoodie and walked over to open my window. I didn’t know what to say, so again, I just stood there like an idiot.