Ever Tempted (16 page)

“What would she have said?” Allie’s voice was soft.

“A whole lot of motherly stuff, but mainly that girls need words instead of actions. I didn’t give Grace the truth soon enough to get her off my back when I was a boy. Maybe telling her how I really felt sooner, instead of trying to prove my feelings or lack thereof, would have saved us a lifetime of trouble. You’re right. After all these years, I should have learned something. Mama would have said, ‘Sometimes girls need words.’”

Allie looked puzzled.

“Believe me, I had the same reaction to some of her insights myself. She meant I don’t communicate my feelings or insecurities enough. I’m always scared of the reaction I might get. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to control what will happen after I speak the truth. With you, I’m even more terrified of that than I ever was. I told her once you were like a tornado meeting a hurricane. A force of nature I didn’t know what to do with if I remember correctly.” I sat down near Allie, but not too close. “She said she thought you were amazing. She was a great judge of character.”

“Well, the tables have certainly turned. When I first met you, you intimidated the hell out of me. I didn’t think you could ever love me. You were so intense.” Allie stared at another family photo made here on the plantation not too long before I’d met my demise. “Is this you or your father?”

I took the photo. “It’s me. Right before I died. Inside, I haven’t changed much. I still tend to keep secrets to protect you.”

Allie looked to me her eye dark with pain. “I wish you would trust me.”

“I wish you wouldn’t fly off the handle and try to handle things yourself.”

“I wouldn’t try if you’d let me fight with you. In this case, you gave up on us. It’s always her. She always gets the guy. I don’t even know her that well, but I take it—she always got what she wanted.”

“She never had me.” With my forefinger, I tipped Allie’s chin.

Her expression softened. She leaned in to me.

Just before our lips met, she pulled back and turned away. “I can’t. I still see you and her in a bed.”

Frustrated, I fell back on the wall and propped my arms on my knees. They didn’t hurt. The joints in them should have ached out of control at the thought of touching Allie, but nothing. Still.

Allie straightened photos that didn’t need straightening. “The twins took Eliza’s journals and the books with all of her spells. I never believed in any of this stuff until I came here. Ghosts, no. Witches, never. Spells, not in a million years. But here we are.”

It would probably make her madder, but I spoke, anyway. “Since Grace is under some sort of sleeping spell, it seems the shifting part of the curse is asleep too. I’d have no trouble making love to my wife, but she’s too sickened to touch me.”

“Grace wins again.” Allie stood. “This will be the last time that’s true.”

Allie took a book with her out of the room and left me sitting in the middle of my past. It was all I had to hold on to. My future was so uncertain.

And how would I ever gain Allie’s trust or show her how much I truly loved her if all she could see when she looked at me was her sister’s deceitful face?

* * * *

At the bottom of the stairs, Allie, Kaitlyn, and Shelby stood. The spoke in hushed tones until they looked up and caught me staring at them from the top of the stairs on the second floor.

“Hey,” Shelby said.

“I’m telling him.” Kaitlyn faced me. “Come on down.”

“First let me say something.” I met them at the bottom.

All three of them stood in a half circle, regarding me with curiosity.

“Don’t say anything you’ll regret and don’t try to stop us at every turn. If you want Allie’s trust, you have to be a part of what we do next. We work better as a team.”
Kaitlyn’s wise thoughts caught me before I spoke.

“I just wanted to apologize. It’s going to take some time to learn to trust others with the thing most important to me.” I faced Allie. “It may seem exactly the opposite, but you are the most important person in my life. I just want you happy and safe. I tend to take matters into my own hands more than I should, but it’s only with your best interest at heart.”

Allie arched a brow. She was still silent and had a hard time looking at me very long.

“That said, I’m interested to hear what you have come up with.”

“We’re going to do some research to see if we could find ancestors of Eliza. If we have someone in her bloodline, maybe we can do more to stop the curse. I was getting to that last night, but I wanted to talk with Allie before I disclosed our exact plans,” Shelby said.

Everyone was quiet mentally and physically as they waited for my response.

“I won’t be much help while Grace is asleep. While she’s under this spell you girls conjured up, my shifting abilities are on hold too. I can’t protect any of you the way I am normally able, so please don’t do anything too awfully dangerous while she’s out.”

“Can you still hear our thoughts?” Shelby’s face twisted with worry.

“Yes. I’m not sure why that was left to me, but at least we still have that advantage. I’ll be able to hear you when you need to keep our words private.” I sat on the stairs and regarded the girls.

Shelby had small bags under her eyes and looked as though she was spent. “I’m hoping I’m strong enough to keep her unconscious for the rest of the week.”

“If you can’t, I’m afraid of what she might do.” I peered at Allie, but just long enough for her to know my words were meant for her. “It’s weird, but when you’re mad, I can’t hear you. That’s been a blessing until now, but I need to be able to communicate with you. I need you to find a way to keep your anger with me to a minimum. I know it’s asking a lot after all I’ve done to you, but I can’t be much help if I can’t hear you.”

Allie sighed. “I can’t promise anything.”

“You guys need some time to sort through things while we continue to work.” Kaitlyn squeezed Allie’s hand.

“This is a crappy honeymoon.” Allie turned, but not before I saw tears welling in her eyes.

I searched for anything but her to train my focus on. The large mirror at the bottom of the stairs where I’d stood when she came down that night so long ago in her wedding dress held my gaze. Why couldn’t we just be happy like we were then?

“I think Allie’s had enough of me today. Given my weakened state, I’m just going to go to the cottage and rest. I didn’t sleep very well last night.” Using the handrail, I stood and stalked to the back of the house.

All the other people in my life were either dead or hated me, so I wanted to be close to someone who wasn’t angry with me. Mama. The only way I could was to be in the cottage where she’d last rested her head in prayer on the side of her bed.

* * * *

All my things were still there. No one had tried to change the small two-bedroom house I’d grown up in. It was the perfect temperature inside, not too hot, not too cold. Just right. The way it always was. I pulled the screen door behind me but left the heavy wooden door standing open for a breeze.

In 1879, my mother would have been sitting on the long sofa, crocheting or dashing around the kitchen readying the table for dinner. I saw the old me sneak up behind her and plop a kiss right on her cheek. She’d jump and chide me for scaring the life right out of her.

As always, I’d chuckle and jump to help her with the final touches of the evening meal.

Pop’s heavy footfalls would thump from the front door to the table. Weary, he’d slide a chair out and rest for a few minutes.

Mama would send him out back to wash up before we ate.

He’d grumble but always did as she asked.

Those days had been so simple.

In the hallway, I turned to my room and lay down on the bed. I’d planned to stare at the ceiling for a while but fell asleep.

When I woke, it was dark.

I was alone.

I shouldn’t have been. I should have been with the woman I’d loved for over a century.

I stood and went to the other bedroom. Mama and Pop’s.

I stood very still and closed my eyes as the pain of their memories filtered through me. I could almost hear Mama reciting her evening prayer, asking our Heavenly Father to watch over Pop and me. Begging for our health and a long, happy life.

I’d gotten the long part, but happy was so far away it seemed impossible.

With bent knees, I rested my head on the bed where my mother and father had rested peacefully night after night so many years ago. “Mama, I know you’re not here, but I wish I could see you one more time. You always knew just what to say and do when I messed things up. And I’ve messed up bad. I never purposely get myself into these sticky situations, but they have a way of finding me.”

I sank my forehead into the bed.

For a second, I felt her hand on my arm. In a whisper, her words found me. “Be true. Be the man I raised you to be.”

I lifted my head, sure that she’d spoken to me. I didn’t have to see her.

She’d always be in my heart and my soul.

Pop’s strength and her gentle hand had made me who I was today. I had to continue to make them proud.

“Cole, are you in here?” I heard from the front door. The living room lights came on.

I didn’t move. “In the bedroom.”

Allie walked in behind me and gasped. She flipped the light switch on. “Are you all right?”

“I’m fine. Just meditating.”

Silently, she came to my side and knelt down beside me.

“Mama spent a lot of time here. When she was troubled, especially.”

Her voice was soft. “Is that why you’re here?”

“Mostly.” I leaned back against the wall.

Allie put her back against the bed. She regarded me with intensity I wasn’t used to.

I didn’t know what to say or not say, so I stayed quiet. That gave me time to notice she’d made the walk to the cottage in a night gown and a flimsy robe.

My gaze slid down her neck, but I stopped and looked at the bedspread. I couldn’t think about what I missed so much.

She wrapped her arms around her. “I didn’t actually expect to find you at two in the morning. I figured you’d be out in the woods. I forgot the shift was temporarily halted.”

I dared to look at her. I wanted say I missed her so bad that I couldn’t sleep, but I kept it to myself. “I was asleep until not too long ago.”

“Me too. I had another of my famous bad dreams. I might be angry, but I wouldn’t want anything awful to happen to you. I had to come check.”

Lightning flickered outside the window.

“I’ll walk you back to the house, and we’ll talk more in the morning. I know you must be exhausted.” Wind roared against the cottage’s walls. “We’d better hurry. It sounds like a storm blowing in.”

Allie followed me through the house.

The wind rattled the shutters. Just as I reached the door, it slammed by itself.

I tried it, but it wouldn’t budge.

Lightning shattered the black sky, and thunder rumbled the old windows.

The room went dark around us.

I jiggled the doorknob harder. “I have an idea that’s no natural storm.”

A few of the windows at the house remained filled with a faint glow, and the lampposts surrounding the Rose Maze were left unaffected.

Allie covered her arms and looked around the room. “We could try the back door.”

At least the twins hadn’t wanted to see me miserable. They must not have realized that being alone with someone who really didn’t want to be with me was more misery than I could stand.

After another flash of lightning, Allie’s profile was the only thing I could make out in the dark.

“I hate storms.” Allie’s voice was tight.

“I’ll check the back door.” I slipped around her and tripped on the tea table.

Allie caught my arm. “If they’re anything, they’re thorough. If they’ve manipulated the weather to keep us down here alone, I’m sure they’ve secured every exit. Don’t bother.”

A splash of cold washed over me as Allie rubbed her arms.

“Does it feel colder to you?” I asked.

For the first time, Allie laughed. “Like I said. Thorough.”

“I’ll get you an extra blanket. You can sleep in my room. I’ll take Mama and Pop’s.” I started for the linen closet.

Allie was silent as she followed me.

Lightning illuminated the old windows as I turned it down for her and spread another blanket across the bed.

Thunder rattled the old shutters.

Allie jumped.

“Go ahead.” I held the covers up for her.

With a worried expression, she glanced toward the window, then slipped between the sheets. As I pulled the blanket up, she grabbed me.

Our gazes locked.

“Don’t go.”

I was ablaze.

Her fingertips slid up my arm. “Please. I don’t want to be alone.”

My muscles drew tight. I couldn’t be in the same room with my wife and not want her. There was no way I could sleep in the same bed and not have her more pissed at me than she already was.

I was only human. Mostly.

Allie pulled a pin out of her hair. It fell in long waves on her shoulders.

I took in a shaky sigh.

Lightning flashed again, but no thunder followed other than the sound of my heart in my ears.

“Please.” Her voice was silk, and her eyes begged in another flash of silent lightning.

I crawled in beside her and pulled the covers up. With my arms above my head, I lay as still as I could, wondering what in the hell I’d gotten myself into.

Staring at the ceiling with me, she lay on the pillow so close I could hear her heartbeat.

Heavy rain pelted the roof.

Thunder clapped.

Allie jumped against my arm and hesitantly laid her head on my shoulder.

My temperature skyrocketed and my heart hammered.

Allie’s chest rose and fell rapidly. Her lips touched my chest. “I miss you.”

I slipped my arm around her and exhaled with relief.

“But I’m still mad,” she whispered in a velvet voice. It was sexy as hell, though I was sure that wasn’t her intention.

“I know.” I trembled at her touch, but not as a result of the animal. I was so damned nervous she had to notice the bed vibrating. “I can’t stop being a dick these days.”