Ever Enough (11 page)

“As if you’d let me get away with anything else!” I hollered as I made my way back towards Finley, who was watching me intently. Was this really happening?

Grabbing my bag, Finn reached out and took it off my shoulder. “I’ve got this”, he said with a smile.

We walked silently to his dark blue mustang. He threw my bag in the back seat and we both climbed in. Starting the ignition, Linkin Park started blasting through the speakers. He looked a little embarrassed and turned it down. “Sorry.”

“No, don’t be. I love Linkin Park.”

Looking at me he smiled and said, “She’s cute AND she’s got good taste in music.” He shook his head and started making his way out of the school parking lot. I sat there stunned. I wasn’t sure I’d heard him right. Finley Morgan couldn’t possibly find me cute. I was just an average girl that tried to blend in.

I gave him directions to my house, and only five minutes later we were pulling into my driveway. Damn, I wished I lived further so I could stay in the car with him longer. We hadn’t talked much other than what kind of music we both liked, and now there wasn’t time for anything else to come up.

Not wanting this to feel awkward, I unbuckled my seatbelt and was about to reach for my bag when Finn leaned over the seat and grabbed it before I could. He must’ve been ready for me to get out so he could go home or wherever else it is he went after school. “Thanks for the ride Finn. I’m sure I’ll see you around school.”

Before I was able to push my door open Finn spoke up. “Hold on my Tiny Girl.” He paused and I turned and looked at his face. He seemed to want to say something else. “So I just get the ‘see you around’ brush off?” What more did he want? He couldn’t possibly want me to hang around so we could talk music some more. Not that I would mind. I didn’t even think he knew I existed, let alone having things in common.

“Well…yeah?” I made it sound like a question since I wasn’t sure where he was going with this. “Don’t you have other things you could be doing besides driving me around?”

“I’m sure there ARE other things I could be doing but I’m with you right now. And if you’re okay with it, I’d like to spend some more time with you.” My heart kicked into overdrive. “I was going to see what you were doing on Friday night. I thought maybe you’d like to come over to my place. I’m having a little get together with some friends and it would be nice if you were there.”

“Ummm…” It wasn’t that I was unsure—okay well maybe a little unsure—but this sort of thing just didn’t happen to me. Finn was part of the popular crowd. I truly didn’t get why he was asking ME to come over. “Well, I’ve never been to any of the parties before and I’m not sure I’d fit in… and if I go, Harper will be with me…” He interrupted me by putting his hand out and placing it on mine. It was so rough, probably from playing football. I felt like all the oxygen had been sucked out of the car, and I began silently freaking out.

“Relax Tiny, of course Harper is invited too.” He gave me a cocky smile. “Besides, I think Kyler may have a little thing for her.” Harper was going to crap her pants when I tell her! “Just come relax and have a good time. I promise you’ll have fun, and I really want you there.”

Deciding to just go with it, I gave him a definite ‘okay’. We smiled at each other and I got out of the car. Finn didn’t leave my driveway until I walked inside my house and shut the front door.

I woke up when I felt something bump into my arm. As I struggled to get my bearings, I noticed it had been the drinks cart coming through; my arm must have been sticking out into the aisle. I asked the flight attendant for a glass of water and sat there in a daze. It had been a long time since I’d dreamed about Finn. I know seeing him and sharing that kiss had opened the flood gates, and my memories began pouring through my mind. I felt so confused! I should have never let that kiss happen. I think deep down I knew that something
would happen if
I was left alone with Finn—whether was just a talk or something more—I just didn’t know if I’d actually
wanted
it to happen.

I sighed. I was a horrible person. I cheated on my husband and confessed to my high school sweetheart that I wasn’t happy with my marriage. I wasn’t sure how I would move past this, and how—or if—I was going to tell Weston what happened. I just knew that getting away from Finley, and leaving that town with all those memories, was the only way to gain some perspective.

Another hour passed while my mind reeled, and before I knew it we were making our approach into Chicago. I decided not to tell West what happened. We were struggling enough as it was, and I didn’t want to add to our problems. I would continue on like nothing happened and that kiss was just a mere accident. Problem solved.

Yeah right.

If I thought that I could forget about that kiss and how it had made me feel, I was extremely delusional!

I must have been in some sort of daze because I couldn’t remember the journey from the airport to my driveway. All I knew was that I felt exhausted. It was still dark and I sat in my car, trying not to fall asleep before I made it into the house. I got out of the car, grabbed my bags and made my way inside. West was probably asleep so I tried to be as quiet as I could. I just wanted a good night’s rest and then I could go about life as if the reunion never happened. My cell had been going off with texts from the moment I turned it on at the airport. Most were from Harper, one was from my parents—probably checking to make sure I made it okay—and two were from a number I didn’t recognize. I wasn’t in the mood to read them. I let out a long sigh and shut off my phone, placing it on the entry way table. Everyone could wait until the morning when I felt better.

As I walked down the hall I heard a noise coming from my bedroom. I stopped and listened, but all I heard was silence. Just as I was about to take a step forward I heard it again. My heart began to beat a little faster. Oh my god, was that a woman? What was a woman doing in my bedroom at two in the morning? I stood motionless, convincing myself I was hearing things in my tired state. No sooner had the thought crossed my mind, a female giggle came from behind the closed door.

I crept towards my bedroom door and listened. That’s when I heard West’s voice; he was speaking to someone. They were words that a husband definitely shouldn’t be saying to a woman who wasn’t his wife. I didn’t want to see what was behind the door but I knew my eyes would confirm what I’d heard. Slowly turning the handle I cracked the door open a little at first, then pushed it the rest of the way. I didn’t know what to make of the scene before me. There in my bed was a very naked West with Julia, our interior designer. She was half lying on the bed, her elbows on the mattress and ass in the air. West was behind her, fucking her like the bitch that she was. I couldn’t move. This was not something that I could process. Neither one of them had noticed me yet. West’s hand came down hard on Julia’s ass, and she giggled again like some neurotic school girl. The slap startled me. She looked over her shoulder at him, “You like it real dirty, don’t you Weston? I’m not your fucking wife, so fuck me like you mean it!” She practically purred at him.

Seeing red I turned on the lights and both stopped mid-motion. “What the fuck is going on here?” I bit out. Neither of them said a word, but at least West had the decency to move away from Julia, pulling a sheet around his waist as he did. The silence was doing nothing but pissing me off even more. “I said, what the
fuck
is going on here… IN MY BED!?” I screamed.

West started to walk towards me but I held my hands up to let him know he better stay where he was. If he so much as touched me, I couldn’t guarantee I wouldn’t murder him there on the spot. I had no idea what to do, or say. I felt bile come up my throat and I knew I was close to throwing up. I willed it to stay down when West finally spoke.

“Emilyn, what are you doing home?” I was still standing in the doorway with the back of my hand over my mouth. I looked at him when he asked the question but couldn’t answer. Without waiting for me to respond, he continued. “Listen, this was just a one time thing. I called Julia to ask her about possibly redesigning the wine cellar and she told me that she could stop by this evening. I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

Wasn’t that what all cheating men said? ‘I didn’t mean for it to happen’ what a load of shit! Julia scoffed. I glanced over to see she was still lying in
my
bed. “West you might as well tell her everything. There’s no need for us to keep it quiet anymore. She’s seen us and we can finally be together.” She looked right at me while she spoke the words that I knew deep down were the truth. Somehow I knew that there was no way this was the first time they’d been together. West had been pulling away from me for quite a while. He’d spent a lot of late nights at his office and every time I would stop by to surprise him with lunch or just to see him, she was always there. I’d asked him about it and he always said she was redesigning another room in the office. I shouldn’t have been so naive. There were only so many rooms this woman could redecorate.

Her cold stare shook me from my silence. “You’ve been sleeping with her for at least two years now, haven’t you?” Shaking my head I turned away from her and looked at him, but he just stared at me. “You son of a bitch, we’ve been married for eight years West. How could you do this to me? To
us
?”

“Okay you know what? Fine!” he said throwing his hands up in the air. “I’m not happy Emilyn. I haven’t been happy for most of our marriage. I knew I needed a wife so the law firm here in Chicago would take me seriously. I needed them to see me as a family man that was dedicated and you fit the bill.” I stood there listening to him continue on, his words like ice numbing my soul. “You always seemed to just do whatever I wanted and it worked out perfectly for me. But give me a break Emilyn, you live in this multi-million dollar house, you can spend whatever you want, so don’t act like you’re unhappy.”

I watched his face closely. He couldn’t possibly be serious. “You think I’ve been
happy
? Do you even know me at all Weston? Your money means
nothing
to me?” My voice rose slightly with every word spoken. My body started to shake. I really felt like I was in some sort of alternate universe. This couldn’t be happening to me. “You’re standing there telling me that the entire eight years I’ve devoted to you, it has all been for show?” I didn’t give him time to answer before I asked the question that I knew would break me. “Did you ever love me West?”

Looking me right in the eye, he stated simply, “I suppose, for a short time. Or at least I thought I did.”

“Bastard.” The word was a whisper; barely audible. My life was crumbling around me and his stupid whore was
still
lying in
my
fucking bed! That was it for me. I turned and started to leave the bedroom. He followed after me as I walked into the living room and grabbed my rolling suitcase.

“Where are you going Emilyn? We need to talk about this.”

I gave a short mocking laugh, “No West,
we
don’t need to talk about anything. You seem to have made all the decisions in this marriage, and it’s apparent that that was all a big lie.” That’s when it occurred to me. I stopped in my tracks but kept my back to him. I had to ask him this final question, all the while knowing it was the blow that I would never recover from. “What about kids West? You said you wanted kids in the beginning and yet you kept pushing the idea away since we moved here to Chicago. Did you lie about that too?”

I heard him take a deep breath before he answered. “I want kids.” He thought about what he was about to say next. “I just don’t want them with you.” I leaned over and grasped the wall for support. “Emilyn, I think I’ve fallen in love with Julia. You had to have known at some point that this marriage wasn’t going to last. You were just a means to an end. I need a woman that can stand up for herself; someone with a backbone.”