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Authors: Vanessa Buckingham

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Jack explained to me that at one point vampires
had lived in the sewers among London’s poor and would feed off of them. No one
would notice a poor man missing. A poor man or woman generally had no family or
they had been orphaned. Many were dying from hunger or sickness by the time a
vampire decided to turn them into food. Jack explained that to live in the
sewers as a poor man was to blend in. Since we don’t burn in the sun, the only
way to identify a true vampire is by the aura we emit and the paleness of our
skin. Many were killed and burned at the stake accused of being vampires. Since
we are indestructible we are not easily killed by mere mortals. We are actually
not very easily caught.

8. HERE WITHOUT YOU

A

FTER WE UNPACKED, JACK
WANTED to go back to his hunting ground for old time’s sake and I joined him
for a “tour of the city,” you could say. We walked around the dark streets of London
for what seemed like an eternity. Jack basically had a history lesson for each
landmark we passed. I was just too eager to go exploring. I know being a
vampire you have plenty of time to learn patience; however, this is so new to
me that patience isn’t exactly a virtue right now. I inhale the cool brisk
London air and enjoy it. For some odd reason it felt great to be somewhere new.

The London streets were crowded with pedestrians
making their way to some unknown destination. I could smell a pungent odor
heavy with perfumes and colognes. This was something new, something I
understood was cultural. No different than the streets of New Orleans.

We walked towards Hackney, one the Ghettos of East
London. I was certainly not expecting what I encountered. The ghetto were
modern apartments in which cultures remained separate. It reminded me of the
Jewish Ghettos of World War II only this was modern day London and there were
Muslims, Asians, Indians, black, and white. Each contained to their own part of
the ghetto. It was nothing the way I imagined it would be. I was certainly experiencing
cultural shock at this point. I stared up at them in sadness. A world united,
yet separated at the same time.

All the while we had walked, unsure what Jack was
looking for, I was lost in my own thoughts. Without realizing where I was going
we reached an unlit alley way in which Jack said he could remember when nothing
stood here but the filth of London, there was a slight disdain to his voice. We
walked to the sewer entrance and with the greatest of ease, he lifted the sewer
cover.

“Shall we?” he asked

We proceeded to jump in and landed softly without
a sound.

“What do you smell Salome?” Jack asked.

“Filth, rotten sewage,” I responded.

 “Nothing else? Look around you,” he gently
ordered.

I did. I was shocked by what I saw. London’s old
sewer.

“We’ll go right this way,” he directed.

I followed him for what felt like miles and soon
we heard laughter, saw a fire in a metal barrel. Some of London’s poor still
live in the sewers. They turned to us when we approached them. An odd
expression in their eyes. Their thoughts incoherent. Drunk, I guess, since I
smelled the aroma of stale beer. We kept going. We walked for hours in the
labyrinth of London’s Sewers. It was quite easy to distinguish the newer parts
of the sewer from the older part. The older parts contained brown smooth
stones, some falling away with age.  

I still was not sure what we were doing here, but from
watching Jacks movements ever so subtle so delicate, it looked as though Jack
was reliving the memories of his past. Suddenly I saw a soft, warm glow of
light.

“Torches,” I said aloud.

Jack turned to me with a finger to his lips to
silence me. I suddenly saw them in the chamber. Jack called out for them in a
language long since gone; slowly, soundlessly they approached us. They appeared
weary of us. I realized this was a nest and the way they were dressed made me think
they did not go out much. Jack spoke with one in a language I did not
understand and the old one smiled. He led us to another chamber.

As I followed him, I looked around me and I saw
the writings on the wall. I meant that literally. It dawned on me it was a
detailed history of London from the time of the Great Fire to now. I was awed
by what I saw. In another chamber there was more writing. A history of the
nest. I looked at them and back at the wall. Many of the nest were lost except these
few were all that remained, forced into the sewers in the late 18
th
century during the witch hunts.

I realized quickly, my first impression of them was
accurate they never left the sewers. They fed off of the wraiths who found
themselves lost down here, rats and lost pets. They continued to fear the
outside world for some reason. I looked to Jack for an answer. It dawned on me.
The answer was in history and I pitied them.

We continued with them for a bit longer. Jack
stood up and led us out. It’s time for them to hunt, he stated. We continued
through the sewers and I noticed the further we walked the older the sewers
were. Parts of the sewer had crumbled; some were lined with a smooth stone. It
reminded me of pathways. We finally made our way out of the sewer and found
ourselves near Big Ben. Interesting. I asked Jack what the purpose of our
little tour was. It was just in case I slipped and we needed a quick escape. 
The River Thames is just a few blocks down from our exit.

“Jack,” I began, “I already know the answer, but I
still want to hear it. Why have they never left the sewer?” I questioned.

“The safety of the sewer was supposed to be
temporary, but as time went on and era’s changed when they emerged, it was to a
world unbeknownst to them. They no longer recognized the London of their time.
It was this fear of the new world that kept them there. Yes, they would be able
to adapt fairly quickly as most of us have chosen to, but let me ask you, if
you had continued to be human and were relocated to an area with no
electricity, no running water, and food was hard to come by how do you think
you would fair?” He explained.

“So what you are saying is that in a sense they
suffered from cultural shock and decided to remain where they felt most at
home,” I replied glad to know I was on the right track.

“Exactly,” he exclaimed.

I noticed the hour and realized the pubs would be
closing soon. We start walking back toward “civilization,” and little by little
the crowds began to thicken on the sidewalks. I noticed many could barely stand
victims of their heavy drink. It is time to go. Humans are not supposed to stay
out all night without sleep. It would seem strange if we stayed out all night.
I honestly did not care, I wanted to go out and continue exploring this new
world.

We hail a taxi and make the journey back to the
hotel, feigning sleep and exhaustion. Actually another perk if you would call
it that, is that we don’t sleep, no snack breaks, unless you count feeding
every once in a while, and no bathroom breaks. With all the time that I have at
my disposal, I tend to get creative. Jack enjoys the fact that I stay busy. Being
busy keeps me from having too much time to think about other things. I could
not stop from thinking, wishing that Axel and my children could be here with
me. Instead I am here without them. I push the thought aside before I give into
to that emotion.  

Our stay in London was
short lived by my standards. But I made good use of what little time we spent
here. Unbeknownst to Jack I began to make frequent runs to the sewers. I was
curious of the old ones and fascinated by them at the same time. Sometimes I
would lose track of time before I would realize the sun was rising outside. My
time with the old ones is one that I would cherish.  

I am not exactly sure what
it was that Jack did these days. I know he would go out and return before the
sun rose. I asked him one day and he just told me he was working on business. I
was not sure what kind of business he had to attend to. I imagine being alive
this long his business ventures were many. So I spent a lot of time alone these
days. Being alone is something I am not used to. I tend to get bored easily
which is how I began to find myself in the London sewers just about every day.
The old ones came to trust me. I was amazed by them and it appeared that they
too enjoyed my company. Every so often I would come across someone with evil
intentions and I would carry them away to the old ones. I would give them a
proper meal, a sort of break from the rats that overwhelmed the sewers. They
appeared to enjoy this kindness.

Although they never left
the sewers, they did their hunting in the underground labyrinth of the sewers. Their
diet consisted primarily of giant sewer rats that even I found deplorable. As
much as I detested the taste of human blood, I hated rats even more. On one of
my visits they offered me one the size of a house cat and out of respect to the
old one’s I drank it. I hid the disgust from showing on my face. The more time
I spent in London’s sewers the easier it became for me. Having some type of
companionship was something I craved. I loved hearing the histories of the old
ones.

There was Pullo, an old
Roman Gladiator, was turned by a vampire masquerading as a Roman noblewoman.
She had risked her own life to save his in the arena and in so doing revealed
her true self. She fled with him to Britannica, else the Roman Emperor should
himself seek her out to destroy her.

Then there was Lucius, he
was one of the Roman Senators and one of Caesar’s conspirators. Lucius
basically sold his sold in exchange for immortality. You can guess what his job
was. I was enchanted with Lucius’ tale of revenge and murder. To meet someone
who had helped to facilitate the murder of one of Rome’s greatest men was
beyond belief.

Leta, was a young woman,
a Viking by her short golden hair. Her heavy accent made it difficult to
understand her story, partly because her tongue was cut out of her in battle.
Leta preferred to dress in a manly fashion and so it was she found herself near
death in the arms of Viktor her creator. Leta’s story is similar to mine. She
dressed as a man to join battle and was injured severely. In trying to help her
the men found out a woman had joined their ranks and each had a turn with her.
As punishment she was left for dead and her tongue removed. To prevent her from
telling tales in the afterlife. There were many more vampires down here and
each eager to tell me their stories. So it was that I came to visit them every
day. Learning more about them and the different things they could do. With
Leta, I felt. bonded. We were women whom the world had done a great injustice.

When I look back and
reflect, being in London is something I had always dreamed of back when I was
mortal. It was sad that I would be here without the ones I loved. Being here,
living a different life, being a different person.

9.
PARADISE LOST

P

ERCEPTIONS OF LIFE AND OF
ALL things vary. Everyone experiences life differently, as is the case with me.
According to Jack, I took to immortal life with ease and finesse. I also took
on a new hunger for life, for knowledge. I learned a long time ago that the way
people process reality is different in so many ways and that no one version is
ever the truth. When I was human I experienced life as a passing blur, now that
I was no longer human it was not a passing blur, sadly I had forgotten how to
live life and enjoy it. I regret the things I should have done or said. The
only thing I can do is look forward and hope that I do not break because that
is the direction I was going, I wanted to mourn all I had lost but I could not
bring myself to do so. To do so would mean my very own destruction.

If I could sleep I would
dream of them here with me. My children running around on the soft damp earth.
I continue to hang on to the ever fading memories and hope that one day I could
hear the soft pitter patter of little feet and the excited voices as they find
the joy in life. This is my new reality, a reality without the ones I loved.
For this moment, I push the idea aside and continue on with life.

After a few weeks in
London, I finally found out what Jack had been doing. He had surprised me with
a cottage outside of Bodmin, England. It was beautiful almost like a fairytale,
with beautiful gardens, fountains and a pond with Koi fish. The cottage was so
cozy and it was perfect in every way. I was excited by such a gesture from Jack
and if my heart could still beat, it would have been warmed by the thought. I
realized for the first time in a long time I was happy. I knew it would take
time to ease the pain of my loss, but my family would always be with me. If
only things had happened differently, then we could have been here, together as
a family to experience the beauty that this world had to offer. Maybe one day
they would get the chance to explore it.

I looked into Jack’s
mind, he did not block me this time, and his thoughts were pure. He felt that
not only would the humans be safer with me in the county (yes he actually
thought it and I was grateful for the thought), but that I would enjoy the
scenery. I must confess it takes my breath away. For me to be here, in such a
beautiful country was overwhelming. I inhaled deeply and I could smell the
salty aroma that only the sea could give. I had never seen cliffs before, I
would have to explore it in full when I get the opportunity to do so.

Even though Jack and I
had relocated to the countryside, I still continued my nightly ritual of
running to London to meet with the old ones. For some time, Jack did not notice
my absence, that is until the day he went to seek me out. He walked through the
cottage room by room and he walked the gardens and the beach He searched for me
inside and out until he came upon my scent in the Cardinham Woods. By the
strength of my scent it was less than an hour old, so he followed it.

I can only imagine he was
hoping with all hope that I had not taken to hunting in Bodmin. As he
approached the village the scent continued on past Exeter, past Salisbury and
on towards London. He feared what a new vampire loose in England was capable of
and was hoping I was not out hunting without him. He felt on edge because of my
absence and the possibilities, but he also gave me the benefit of the doubt. I
had made him second guess me on more than one occasion. If he had been mortal,
he would have had a heart attack by such a scare. Fortunately for him he was
immortal and incapable of such behavior.

I smiled at his thoughts.
I was amazed that through such a great distance I was still able to hear them.
I informed the old ones of Jacks approach. I gave them a play by play of
everything going on in his mind. They found his internal fear humorous and even
I joined in the ruckus.

At the entrance of the
sewer, Jack was met by Avitus, an ancient vampire. He was kind hearted and very
grandfatherly. Avitus’ pale skin looked so papery and fragile. I guess living
in isolation and rarely feeding has this effect on us. I don’t think I was interested
in trying an alternative life style. The old one looked to him in passing and
told him I spent my nights with the old ones learning their histories. He also
told him he needed to trust a little. Jack smiled at him.  

Jack and Avitus proceeded
down the winding maze of the sewers and with my hearing focused I could hear
him approaching us. His thoughts closer to mine. The old ones continue their
stories, for a brief moment reliving the past. At last he reached us and tried
to keep his presence secret from me. I struggled with this because I felt
compelled to draw him near me, but I was lost in the enchanting stories of the
old ones that did not want to lose that focus. I felt something in Jack I had
not felt before, it was a new emotion in him. I hear his unspoken thoughts.

He was captivated by me.
He saw my compassion and patience for the old ones. Not many of our kind could
treat them as I could. He was surprised when he saw the old ones bow to me with
reverence. I felt honored by this action.

The histories continued
on, each one just as fascinating as the last. I did not realize how lost I was
in my visions of times long gone. It was not until I saw an armed gladiator
charging towards me and Jack falling back, that I realized he was seeing what I
was seeing. I did not know how I was able to project the images of the
histories so vividly to him. It was as though I had traveled to another time
taking him with me. This was a new talent I had somehow discovered,

I reached out to Jack and
he came up to me and sat beside me. His breath caught as he inhaled. The look
he gave me was one of curiosity.  I took his hand in mine and suddenly, the old
one’s voice began, it had that far away, dreaming voice, he began the story of
our creation:

“In the beginning,
Genesis tells us that God created the heavens and earth; animals and man. Then
one-day God realized that every animal had a mate except for Adam, so it was
that with this realization God created woman and named her Lilith. In this the
story of our creation is born. Lilith questioned her place in a world ruled by
God and Adam. She questioned her duty to submit to Adam and this so angered God
and he cast her out of the Garden of Eden damning her to a life of eternity.

“In this damnation Lilith
was changed and was soon unable to walk in the sun. Lilith became a follower of
the night. For only in the light of the moon was she safe. She found she could
no longer eat the food provided by the Earth, as it no longer appealed to her. Lilith
was so lost in her hunger through her wanders of the lands and near starvation
when she came upon a village sacrificing a bull. The blood spilled from the
bull drove her to near frenzy and she made herself known to the human race.
These early humans believed a Goddess had come from the heavens and they fell
to their knees in worship.

“In this realization,
Lilith learned she could only drink blood, the life’s source of mortality. The
humans built a temple to Lilith where she lived and they worshipped her. Once a
month a young maiden was brought to her as sacrifice. This would appease her
thirst for short periods of time, but it would not completely satiate it. Soon
she realized Adam was no longer in the Garden of Eden and she began to search
the world for him.

“Years passed and she
found no trace of Adam in the world. The world began to change people began to
live in communities, villages and farms. The world now has kings and queens and
the land was divided. There was war, famine, and other natural disasters. The
world was slowly changing and humans were slowly destroying it. The world
became full of hungry, greedy, murderous humans, so much so that God cast them
out and destroyed the world by raining fire and brimstone over it.

“One day during her
travels, Lilith came upon a familiar scent a scent similar to that of Adam. A
musky almost earthy scent. A scent so warm and spicy she could recognize it
from anywhere. After years of being Adam’s wife it was a scent she knew all too
well. So she followed it. At the end of her trail in an open field she found a
farmer who looked like Adam. A young Adam. An Adam of youth. Her throat burned
from thirst and her body yearned for him. As she approached him, she knew this
was not Adam. This man was the son of Adam. In a jealous rage she pounced upon
him and from him she drank his life source. Before taking his life she found
the strength to control her hunger and feed the son of Adam her own blood.
Lilith had been alone for centuries and had never created another creature such
as her. She was unsure if this would work or if the man would die.

“Lilith took flight with
Caine in her arms. For three days she held him and witnessed his change. For
three days she waited and her plan began to grow. Her hatred for Adam and for
God so filled her with rage that it consumed her thoughts. In her state she
could taste the vengeance on her lips. On the third day Lilith unleashed Caine
on Adam and his mother Eve.

“It came to be that
Lilith’s plan worked beautifully for Caine so hated his brother Abel. Abel, who
had the love of his father and the love of God. Caine’s unknown hunger and hate
combined and he could not help himself. He killed his own brother by drinking
his life’s source. Unknown to Caine his father and mother came to seek out Abel
for they had not heard from Caine. Adam and Eve screamed in their horror and in
their anguish fell to their knees and beckoned God to seek vengeance against
their son. God heard the cries of Adam and Eve and so cursed Caine to forever
mourn his brother. After several years Caine became King Consort to Lilith, and
Adam and Eve soon passed and were no more. In their grief God allowed Adam and
Eve to become one with the Earth and suffer the death of Abel no more.”

I read the old one’s mind
and I could see the images his mind created, and these images I projected to
Jack. So lost was I in the tale that when I finally did blink I noticed Jack
was staring at me and so were the others. I saw Jack smile, really smile for
the first time and I finally understood, in his human life he had loved and
lost as well. I remembered in my past that I was loved by everyone and I loved
them too. Maybe I was special and I just did not realize how special. It was
this moment that I knew I could love him more than just as my maker. He stirred
in me a feeling I thought I would never feel again and apparently I did the
same to him.

This new emotion
terrified me. I never thought I could love another. I still mourned the family
I left behind and this is a cross I will always bear. I was unsure if I was
willing to share that cross just yet. I was not yet prepared to let Jack know
how I felt and I knew he too was not ready to love. We were together, yet we
were so alone. We craved each other’s company, but I feared giving into this
one emotion. It would either damn me to hell or absolve me, either way I could
not have the best of both worlds. I wanted Jack and I wanted my family. I could
never have both. 

I was lost in my own
thoughts that I did not hear Jack or the others speaking to me. My eyes were
glazed over in thought. I was a child lost and afraid in a new world. My eyes
blinked for a minute when Jack’s voice broke through my concentration.

“That was interesting,
Salome,” he began. The way he said my name was like a soft caress.

“Salome, are you with
me?” he asked, concern written on his face.

“Oh! I’m sorry. I just
get lost in my thoughts sometimes,” I explained,

“This night proved to be
an interesting revelation for us both,” he stated.

I was unsure what he was
asking me and looked to him for clarification. He shut me out of his thoughts.
I respected this and gave him the privacy he needed. I guess it is safe to say
his thoughts were on me. I just was not sure I was ready to know. 

“I mean the way I can see
the images that your mind creats. I don’t know anyone else that could create
such vivid imagery. The old ones here are unsure what to make of it either?” he
clarified. They find you fascinating and enchanting. I have never seen them
open up to such a young one like yourself. I am sorry I ever doubted you,
Salome. In my experience with new vampires they have always been blood crazy,
mad with the hunger, but you. You baffle me. You have never been mad with
hunger. You have a craving for knowledge. I believe being a mother in your
human life allowed you to overcome the insanity. You see humans as more than
just food. You detest human blood and even when you feed on the evil doers I
can tell it pains you. When you feed off of animals it pains you just as much.
You suffer with the hunger for your own reasons,” he explained.

“Salome, I envy you,” he
began again ever so softly. “You had a world that was perfect for you and only
now you are realizing how precious it was to you. I wish I could take the pain
away from you. I wish that life would have been kinder to you, fairer. Alas, it
was not so.”

While Jack spoke, I sat
there beside him stunned by his words. They meant so much to me. I felt a
silent tear escape my eye. Again I ran through my thoughts and remembered that
as a human I had a deep love for reading and had read several books in which in
my mind I was so lost in the story that I felt I as though I had been sucked
into the story itself. I could picture everything vividly, from the imagery to
the aromas described. It was a though the words came alive in my mind. I did
not know how to explain this to Jack but in the end I tried and succeeded. It
took reading a book for several chapters before he was able to comprehend what
I was telling him.

“I can only make the
assumption that since we are bonded by the blood and as maker and creation that
our connection is strong. Stronger that some of the coupled vampires who have
been together for centuries,” he explained.

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