Eternity's End (65 page)

We are disconnecting from hard-dock now,
came the voice of Glenswarg.
Riggers, you may begin your flight
. As he spoke, the tethers were released and the ships were gently pushed apart by the forcefield bumpers. The two nets separated, and the connection between Legroeder's augments and Freem'n Deutsch's switched to a flux-com link.

Prepare to descend,
Legroeder called.
All riggers, begin to still your thoughts. Let's start with a standard meditation
. He drew a breath and let it out slowly, and allowed his vision to go to soft focus. Drawing on exercises from his earliest rigger training, he began to allow conscious thought to drain from his mind. Around him, the others were doing the same.

Through the connection Legroeder became aware of the
Impris
riggers jittering around.
Relax, everyone,
he called softly.

They began to form images, underwater at first. Legroeder exhaled, watching his breath bubble away. Reduce buoyancy... sink...
This okay with everyone?
As soon as the words were out, he realized that the
Impris
riggers were struggling.

I can't swim!
Jamal cried.

Startled, Legroeder let the image dissolve.
Is this better?
He spun forth an old standby for meditations: a hillside sprinkled with wildflowers. He reclined in the grass and gazed up into a deep cerulean sky.
Fill it in however seems best to you
.

That seemed to work better for Jamal and Poppy. Sighing, Legroeder closed his eyes halfway. He too was having trouble calming down.

// Would you like assistance? An alpha-field?//

(No, let me take it the same way as Jamal and Poppy. I need to know how they're feeling.)

// Understood.//

He tried to let his thoughts go. Banks of pastel mist floated overhead, became clouds drifting in a cyan summer sky.
What color sky do you see, everyone?

Ah, deep purple,
said Palagren.

Blue, shading off to green
. Deutsch.

Blue. Pale blue
. That was Poppy.

I feel,
said Ker'sell,
as if I am back home, waiting for the rain to fall and bring the brinies up to the surface
.

You are indeed relaxed,
Palagren murmured,
if you can think of eating at a time like this
.

Legroeder let a small chuckle escape. He was beginning, just beginning, to let go of his anxieties. He glanced over at
Impris
, a ghostly silver presence on the hillside...

The other ship winked out.

// Loss of signal.//

He cursed.
(Time fluctuation?)

// Most likely.//

Palagren seemed not to have noticed. Legroeder called to him and the Narseil looked around in puzzlement.
What do you mean? Impris is right there. They're starting to look a little transparent, though
.

Legroeder stared, where the ghostly shape of the other ship had just been.
All right,
he said softly.
If you see it, I'm going to count on you to keep track. As far as I can tell, it's gone
. He drew a breath and let it out slowly, thinking: It'll come back again. Just believe that.

He had lost all semblance now of a meditative state.
(Maybe you'd better give me that shot of alpha-wave, after all,)
he muttered to the implants. An instant later, he felt himself calming down. He relaxed his grip on the stern tiller, allowing the ship to drift wherever the Flux wanted to take them.

There was only the slightest movement of cloud in the sky. He focused on his breath. Just be. Feel. He began to enter a deeper state of relaxation, and to let go of some of his deeper anxieties.

After what seemed a very long while, he realized that the ship was
sinking
.

It felt like a softening in the hillside, as if he were sinking into the earth, easing his way down into some subterranean kingdom where hidden thoughts and possibilities lurked, and invisible currents ran. He noted that his rigger-mates were in similar attitudes of meditation. As one, they appeared to be sinking into the image of the hillside; and now, beside them again was the ghostly presence of
Impris
. Overhead, the clouds were starting to move, to drift upward and across.

Movement
.

Legroeder drew a slow breath. It's working. Don't stop now; just keep doing what you're doing. The clouds were scudding overhead now. They were leaving the area of doldrums. But going where? Did they know what they were doing? Could they control their fears?

Just the thought was enough to distract him. The calm was starting to slip away again; feelings and memories were bubbling up unbidden...

A memory of his old riggermate, Janofer—more beautiful than ever. Not now, of all times! Despite himself, he was becoming aroused at the memory, the memory of desire. He'd always been half in love with her...

Legroeder,
the ghostly Janofer whispered, brushing back her long hair, brushing her lips on his neck. No, he thought, this isn't right...

It's very right,
she whispered back to him, turning into Morgan Mahoney.

The sudden change left him breathless. Morgan... Morgan, how are... where are... have you found Maris yet?

Morgan turned to Maris, with a little smile that seemed to say, We hardly even knew each other. But if we'd had the time...

As Legroeder struggled to follow, he seemed to hear his mother's voice echoing the familiar refrain:
If you would take the opportunities life puts in front of you
... from a woman who had taken perhaps one too many opportunities in the form of Legroeder's father, who hadn't stayed around to meet his son. Legroeder felt his old protest rising in his throat. But his mother was long gone; there was no one here to talk to now.

// Warning: this train of thought... //

Was not good. Letting his thoughts get away from him...

But Tracy-Ace/Alfa was here now, as he had somehow known she would be, as if her spirit had always been present, moving through the terrain of his subconscious. She was beckoning to him... her head cocked to one side, augments twinkling, watching him from a position in space, just out of reach.
Hurry and come back,
she said softly.
We have a lot to talk about
.

Yes. Yes! But first they had to get back...

In the net of
Impris
, Deutsch had been laboring to match his efforts with those of his crewmates over on
Phoenix
. He was leading Poppy and Jamal in a maneuver that ran counter to everything they had been trained to do. He wanted them to suppress their inputs; let themselves flow; allow the ship to drift like a cork into a whirlpool. He wanted them to float helpless toward a terror hidden deep in the Flux. So far, he'd been keeping their input to a minimum—for all practical purposes flying the ship himself.

For Deutsch, it was old hat to drift in the Flux; he'd done it as a Kyber raider countless times, like a predatory sea creature camouflaged as seaweed. But to Poppy and Jamal, it was unthinkable. They didn't trust him
or
this plan of falling toward their worst nightmare. They hadn't yet refused an instruction, but they were like two kettles about to blow their lids.

Gentlemen, if we're to stay with Phoenix, we need to follow her precisely. Which means—

We're clear on what it means,
said Jamal, in a mutinous tone.

If we go limp the way you want us to,
Poppy said stiffly,
how are we going to keep from falling right in?

Deutsch drew the net more firmly about himself, thinking, we sure won't fall in if we stay stuck here in the underflux.
Phoenix
had already flickered away for a couple of minutes; now that it was back, he didn't want to lose it again. But when things got more energetic, he wouldn't be able to manage
Impris
alone.

He was not going to win this by arguing. He spoke to his augments.
(Bring up some alpha-wave; amplify and broadcast it into the net.)
On further reflection, he decided to add music, and chose a selection from his augment archives, something soothing.

What's
that
—hospital music?
Poppy asked, with thinly disguised annoyance.

Well, damn, Deutsch thought. It had always worked on the riggers in the raider ships. Maybe musical tastes had changed more than he thought. He riffled through his play list and tried something different, with a little more bass beat and movement, and some horn. It wasn't as soothing to his ears, but he could manage.
Better?

First Poppy, then Jamal shrugged. Deutsch kept an eye on them, and after a few minutes they began to relax. Now, if they just unwound enough for the alpha-waves to start having an effect...

The silvery shape of
Phoenix
shimmered; it began to sink into the hill of mist it was resting on. Deutsch nudged the alpha-field up a little more.

As the net of
Impris
grew calmer, Deutsch thought he felt the tug of the lower underflux, pulling them downward also.

Have to get back.

Heaven and sky
. Legroeder had gotten so absorbed in the vision of all these women, like a testosterone dream, that he'd nearly forgotten what he was doing. He was in the net of a starship, trying to fly out of an impossible situation.

Gazing through the fading image of Tracy-Ace, he saw myriad stars. The ship was falling through space like a stone now. Around him, the Narseil riggers were deep in meditation; only Cantha seemed alert, and Cantha wasn't actively influencing the net. He looked scared, actually.
Everything okay?
Legroeder murmured.

Cantha's neck-sail was quivering; his eyes were darting downward, and back up again.
Thank heaven you're conscious,
he said.
Look down there
.

Legroeder looked—and for a moment, had trouble drawing a breath. Below them, through the faint glitter of the net, he saw the starry darkness change to just plain darkness... and far down, embedded in the deepest part of the darkness, was a writhing thread of fire.

The quantum flaw?
he whispered.

They were falling toward it like a body tumbling from a cliff.

I think we've left the dead zone behind,
said Cantha. He looked at his fellow Narseil.
Should we disturb them?

Yes! Wake them! Do whatever you have to
. Legroeder wheeled around.
Where is Impris?

Far off to the port side, he saw the other ship, tumbling and twinkling. They should bring the two ships back together while they still could. He needed help.
Palagren!
he shouted.
Snap out of it!

The Narseil rigger was slowly turning his head. His neck-sail was glowing a delicate yellowish green along its outer rim; the glow faded as his eyes focused.
By the deeps,
he sighed,
that took me farther than I expected. Were we in entirely separate meditations?

I think so,
Legroeder murmured.
But never mind that. Impris is over there—
he pointed to the tiny, distant ship
—and we're falling fast, toward that
. He pointed down, toward the malevolent light of the quantum flaw. It had grown in the last minute.

Palagren gasped.
We've succeeded!

I think so,
Legroeder said.
But what the hell do we do now?
He felt Deutsch connecting with his implants, asking the same question.

Cantha turned from rousing Ker'sell.
I've been searching for Flux currents leading away from the flaw
.

And?
said Palagren.

What have you found?
Legroeder demanded.

Cantha had links set up to the bridge sensors, and now they flashed a rippling series of lines across the darkness of the Flux below. The lines spiraled and spiked as different measurements were highlighted; it was difficult to discern an overall pattern. But one thing Legroeder did
not
see was anything like a path emerging from the vicinity of the flaw, a path that would take them away from it.

This isn't working the way we'd hoped, is it?
Palagren asked softly.

Legroeder squinted downward.
Do we have any idea what lies
inside
that thing?

I imagine,
said Cantha, almost casually,
that it bears some resemblance to a singularity
.

Legroeder felt his heart stop. He swallowed and peered across at
Impris
, still twinkling at a distance. They were both still falling, the thread of light growing beneath them. Palagren, having roused Ker'sell from his trance, was stretching his arms into the invisible streams like a high-diver.

I really had hoped it would all become clearer once we approached the quantum flaw,
Cantha muttered, adjusting the sensor-displays.

Legroeder tried to keep the desperation out of his voice.
Do you have
any
more data? Anything at all?

I'm trying, but I—wait, let me do something
.

Legroeder waited, for an endless couple of heartbeats.

Cantha made another adjustment, causing a sudden change as all the space around them suddenly filled with what looked like a blue Cherenkov glow.
Can you see it better now?

Unfortunately, Legroeder could. The space around them had suddenly taken on a discernible shape and form. Now he could see all the streams of movement in the region. They were all flowing, twisting, spiraling... all in one direction.

Toward the quantum flaw.

Into
the quantum flaw.

Chapter 32

Sailing the Quantum Flaw

What the bleeding hell are we doing?
Poppy screamed shrilly, deafening Deutsch.
You aren't taking us into that thing!

No choice, Poppy. That's where we're headed
.

No-o-o-o!

Deutsch cut off the music and jacked up the alpha-field.
It's the only way. You've got to forget the dreams. Those are your fears speaking
.