Eternally North (28 page)

Goddamnit Tash, you
couldn’t lie if your life depended on it.
Well, here we go,
time to forge ahead.

“I need to know why
you fought us for so long. Why did you try to push me away? Why
didn’t you want to be with me?” I said in a rush before I
chickened out from asking what I needed to know.

He sighed and glanced
away. “I didn't think I was right for you, Tash. I still don't, you
are too good for me. I thought if I pushed you away, then you could
never want me like I wanted you and the attraction would be mine to
deal with, and mine alone. But when I upset you at the pond, it
nearly killed me. I freaked. Believe me when I say that you were
never the problem, it was my issues that made me act like a fool. I
can't even think back to what I said to you, how I made you feel. I
knew I’d cave in the end, I wanted you too damn much. You can only
fight so long before your heart ultimately defeats your best
intentions.”

“What issues made you
act a fool, Tude?” I pushed.

He hesitated. “I-I…
I can’t say. It’s not another woman, or that I'm embarrassed of
you, I don’t want you to ever think that. It’s complicated, and I
can’t talk about it, but believe me when I say that I’ll protect
you from it. Damn it, I want to tell you but I just... can't,” he
slumped forward in defeat.

I rolled my head back
in exasperation. What was his friggin’ problem? Why did he have to
hide so much?

He read my expression
and gripped my hand. “Tash, this won’t be forever. Hopefully it
will be resolved soon, and I promise you’ll know everything. I just
can’t tell you now, I can't risk it getting out into the public,
and before you say it, I know you wouldn't tell anyone, but there's
legal shit to deal with and... I just can't risk it. I just don’t
want you to give up on me.” He leaned forward and put his head in
his hands.

“Is this secret the
reason you’re in Calgary?”

He nodded in his hands.

“Is it why you live
so close to your family? Why you fought our attraction?”

He nodded once more.

I breathed in the fresh
mountain air.
Okay, I get it.
I was not exactly thrilled, but
I had to trust him. He was somehow protecting his family. That was
something I understood – family first.

“Okay, Tudor. I just
want you to know that I’m here for you if and when you need to
talk. It’s early doors for us; we will just take every day as it
comes.”

He sat back, staring at
the reflected trees on the calm surface of the pond, and whispered,
“Thank you.”

I could see it meant a
lot for someone to say that they would accept him, would trust him;
the tension immediately left his tight shoulders. He glanced at me,
kissed my hand and smiled.

I patted his knee
preemptively. The inquisition wasn’t over that easily. I had one
other question. "You’ve mentioned before that you lived in LA
and you were a bit wild, and the TV report said you had a
‘drink-fuelled year’ – what the hell happened?”

He wrapped an arm
around my shoulders, pulling me in close. "What happened? Fame,
money, fans, you name it. The whole nine yards. I remember moving
there and thinking that I would never be one of
those
actors,
the ones you see falling out of bars, off their face on drugs or
drink.

“I was in LA when I
received some bad news from back home, the same news I can't tell you
about, the same issue that won’t fucking die. I went out that night
and just drank. I woke up the next day in a strange bed with a girl I
didn't know, and that became the pattern. I drank, I fucked, I
forgot. It changed when I got a phone call from my mother telling me
she’d seen me on TV, completely blitzed, and that she was worried
about me and couldn't deal with anything else to cause her stress. I
decided that night to leave LA and move back to Vancouver with my
family, and as soon as the decision was made, the darkness I had been
fighting lifted some, and I've never looked back.

“Raquel happened
during that time and capitalised on the fling, she practically
prostitutes herself out to other actors to increase her own profile,
and I, the drunken sucker that I was, fell straight into her
malicious trap. I actually have no memory of that night. I just woke
up the next morning in her bed, both of us naked. It makes me sick
even thinking about it.

“I'm no longer that
lost guy, Tash. But I do have certain troubles following me, but I’m
working on them. Some I can control, others I can’t. But you will
never be harmed, not if I can help it."

I leaned in and kissed
him passionately, reassuring him. "Thank you for telling me
that."

He shrugged. "Anything
to keep you. I feel like you're always one revelation from slipping
away, that one day I'll wake up and you'll be done with me, with us,
that you will get sick of this life and sick of what being with me
entails, and I'm not only talking about the fame shit, at the moment
that’s the easy part.

“When we were just
friends, the thought of not seeing you again gave me chills, but now
that you’re finally mine…" he turned his head away from my
view.

I nudged his arm
playfully and pulled him in for a hug. "You're stuck with me,
babes, just deal with it! Plus, my va-jay-jay was pissed at me for my
self-imposed celibacy over the past ten months and I’ll tell you
now, she ain’t gonna be too happy if I withdraw the
extremely-bankable Tudor-deposits she’s received of late. I think
she might actually shut down if I do, so you’re good for a little
while longer while my foof gets her fill.”

His mouth dropped open,
for a few seconds before barking out in hysterics, causing a deep
rumbling echo around the ridge.

“Now, let’s go.
I’ll race you back down the hill, emo-boy,” and I took off,
running to the footpath, squealing as I heard Tudor chasing behind
me.

He caught me at the
bottom and spun me around, making me dizzy. He was laughing so hard.
When I shouted “Mercy”, he placed me down in front of him and
kissed me slowly, his hands braced on my head.

He broke the kiss and
walked in front of me, then bent down slightly and looked back. “Hop
on.”

Well, he didn’t have
to ask me twice! I took a run, and jumped onto his back and he
hoisted me up into a piggy-back. I wrapped my arms around his neck
and laid a loud smack of a kiss on his cheek.

I loved this playful
side of Tudor. He began running, making me bounce around and nearly
caused me to fall off his back. We were laughing so much that we
didn’t notice the group of teenage girls just in front of us, eyes
glued to our little game. Tudor held on to my legs firmly and edged
around the girls, heading in the direction of the Jeep. We heard some
gasps and giggling, but Tudor kept his stride fast and never looked
back. I did sneak a glance however, and noticed several iPhones being
played with, but none pointing were in our direction, so I assumed
we’d got by unrecognised.

We made it back to the
car as the sun began to set over the hazy mountains, and Tudor opened
the door for me to slip inside. He jumped in the driver’s seat and
leaned over to peck my cheek, seeming somewhat lighter than a few
hours before. The engine roared to life, and we pulled away from the
parking lot at lightning speed.

As we were driving out
of the exit I saw him smirking. “What are you so smiley about?”

He cast a smarmy look
my way. “The day is almost done. I gave you the day to recover.”

I felt the butterflies
in my stomach and squirmed on the heated seat. Seeing this, he placed
a hand on my upper thigh, teasing me further. I sighed in
frustration. “Tudor?”

“Mmm-hmm?” He
pretended to be unaffected.

“Drive faster!”

“Yes, Ma'am!”

The elevator ride was a
blur, and I have no recollection of actually parking the jeep or
opening the condo door. I do, however, remember Tudor shredding my
outerwear at a ridiculously fast pace, pushing me against the wall
and yanking down my jeans and underwear.

“Tudor, what–?”

“Here, now. The
bedroom can wait,” he demanded.

His jeans and boxers
joined my discarded clothing on the floor, and I pictured in my head
what we must look like: our top halves partially clothed, bottom
halves naked, Tudor’s bare arse on display and my thighs wrapped
tightly around his waist, guiding him straight towards me.

Before I could argue,
Tudor took me against the hard wall, my shoulder blades burning from
the friction. He showed his strength by lifting me over and over
while kissing me roughly, causing me to moan loudly.

I zoned out, lost in
the crazy wall-sex, and didn’t notice the front door opposite fling
open. “Honey I’m hom-!
Arghhhhh!!! What the hell!!!
”

I opened my eyes and
looked straight at a shell-shocked Tink.

Shit!

I frantically tapped
Tudor’s shoulder. “Tudor, stop,
stop
!”

He hadn’t heard the
squealing fairy and carried on regardless, his jerky hip movements
tilting with perfect aim, making me groan and roll my eyes back in
pleasure, determined to make me scream.

“My eyes, my eyes! I
can’t see! I’m blind, blind, I tell you, blind!” wailed Tink as
he ran past us and into the living area.

Tudor heard that one
and stilled, meeting my horrified eyes. “Tash? Shit! Is that Tink?”

I nodded quickly. I
wriggled loose from Tudor’s hold and bent to grab my jeans,
throwing them on as quickly as I could, trying to ignore the
persistent howling coming from the sofa. Tudor did the same, blushing
profusely in embarrassment at being caught.

In the living room, I
stood before the dramatic Geordie queen thrashing about on a mound of
pink silk cushions.

“Oh, my Gods of
glitter! My eyes are ruined by that hetero-horror scene! How will I
ever remove the images? I’m going to have nightmares for months. I
need therapy! Get me a doctor!” He raised his head from the throw
cushion and saw me standing there, arms folded, tapping my foot. “And
he’s paying for it.” Tink continued, pointing exaggeratedly
towards Tudor.

“My delicate eyes
can’t handle what I’ve just seen. Get the eye drops; I need to
wash away the straight!
Arghhh!
How can I go on…?" He
sat up abruptly, looking around the room at a frantic pace, and
started retching. "Quick somebody show me a picture of Channing
Tatum, check I’m still gay!”

“Okay, enough!” I
shouted.

Tink stood and stomped
past me to the kitchen, knocking my shoulder with his as he passed.
He withdrew the industrial-sized bottle of anti-bacterial spray from
the cupboard and practically sprinted towards the recently abused
wall, spraying frantically at the paintwork.

Tudor stealthily moved
to stand next to me, pulling my back to his chest and laid his chin
on my shoulder, watching the show. Tink turned, one hand on his hip,
and marched toward us.

Staring me straight in
the face, he stopped, raised his perfectly-waxed HD eyebrow and
proceeded to spray my crotch with Dettol, until I knocked the bottle
out of his hands.

“What are you
doing?!!!” I screeched, trying to shake off the excess liquid from
my nether regions.

His arms flailed in the
air. “Me??? I’m trying to sanitise this rancid sex pit! Now get
to the shower, missy. I have a bumper pack of douches waiting on
you!”

He began pulling at my
arm to get me out of Tudor’s grip.

“Hey!” Tudor
reached back out and tugged me back towards him.

Tink jerked at my other
arm more vigorously. “Back off you big anabolic steroid, she needs
fumigating due to the salty invasion of your Herman Von
Long-schlong!”

Tudor snatched me back,
putting himself in front of my chest. “Are you being serious?” He
swerved back to me. “Is he being serious?”

I sighed.
“Unfortunately, yes.”

I walked around to
Tudor's side, just in time to see Tink reach behind him for the
remote control and fall back into a fencing position, challenging my
new lover: remote arm out, left arm in the air. “Come on, you bulky
bull, I’ll take you.
En garde!
”

Tink began shuffling
his feet forward and Tudor just stood lock still, absolutely
dumbfounded at Tink’s standard over-the-top-antics.

The fencing fairy
lunged forward and began stabbing relentlessly at Tudor’s hard
stomach with the end of the remote, his only accomplishment being to
turn the TV on and off at an alarming speed.

Tudor was watching Tink
in amazement as he made ‘
Hi-yah!
' sounds and twisted his
wrists to vary his shots and angles. I walked behind the prancing
idiot, picked him up by the waist and spun with him in my arms,
dumping him on the couch.

“
Wil
, you
bitch!” Tink shrilled, jumping up and storming off to his room, but
not before stabbing me in the thigh with the remote.

“Owww, witch! What
the hell?” I seethed.

He put on a cocky smile
from his doorway. “Not sorry, porky!" he yelled, and flipped
me his middle finger, before slamming the door shut with gusto.

I groaned and dropped
down onto the couch, joined seconds later by Tudor. “What the hell
just happened?” he asked in disbelief.

I looked straight ahead
and shrugged. “Tink's pissed; he finds straight sex offensive to
his delicate disposition.”

“Wow,” whispered
Tudor.

I nodded silently. We
sat there for about five minutes before either of us spoke.

“What do we do now?”
Tudor asked, stroking my cheek.

I patted his thigh.
“Oh, just sit tight, His Majesty will be making a second appearance
soon enough. This is far from over. He likes to keep us waiting to
make his finale all the more dramatic.”

He moved closer and
laid his head on my lap. “Well, I’m settling in for the night
then.”