Eternal War Rising to the South: The Beynok Vampire Series (5 page)

His yearning to kiss me consumed me, and I couldn’t resist him. I was no longer in control of my actions. I placed my lips on his. Everything inside of me fell silent, and shock took over. Was he feeling shock or was I? What was I doing? I thought,
I can’t possibly be rational. He’s my enemy.

I started to feel embarrassed and ashamed of my actions. Then I felt his hand wrap around my neck and slowly move to the back of my head to tangle into my hair. His other hand wound itself around my waist. His arms squeezed tighter around my body. And wham. The desire was back and stronger than before. He kissed me almost too hard, a kiss full of desperation. “I'm sorry. It’s been so long for me,” he said. His breath enraptured my body. He moved his lips slowly over mine. He wound more of my hair in his hand, and his grip tightened. A joyous pain shot through me, and I liked it. I was willing, almost too much. I couldn’t help it. I caressed his cheek, heard him sigh, and moved my hand down his firm neck and then to his chest. I stopped over his heart and pushed my hand in harder, trying to pick up a heartbeat, but I couldn’t feel one. Then the realization I was kissing a vampire hit me hard.

I quickly pushed out of his arms and stood up, and Sorin rose to his feet slowly before me. I yelled, “I’m trained to kill your kind. I’m not supposed to have feelings for you. Your feelings invaded me and took over my better judgment. That will never happen again.” I was pacing in front of him. “You know that, don’t you, never again?”

“Yes, I know what you are, along with everything else about you and your kind.” His voice carried an accent, but it wasn’t thick enough to place. “I need to start a fire. The night is getting cold, too cold for you. The night will make it hard for you to make it back to your home, so you need to stay here until morning.”

I stood there while he collected wood for a fire. I had no desire or energy to help. My mind was tired as I watched the moonlight reflect off the current of the creek as it moved downstream. I wished this was a large fast rolling river instead of a slow trickling creek. I could jump in and let it pull me along, taking me wherever it wanted, away from all this confusion. I came out here to get away from Vladimir and my life, to have time to myself to better understand how and what I am feeling, but I seemed to have found another dead-end filled with questions and riddles and definitely something unpredictable.

I had to stay. I knew if I tried to run he’d stop me. Besides, I thought if I stayed, maybe I could find out a little bit more about this vampire and what he wanted from me.

I heard a crackling sound and turned to see Sorin sitting by the fire. It looked warm, and I suddenly realized I was cold. I guessed it was time for me to pretend to be nice and figure out why I was dreaming about him. To try to kill him was an objective as well.

“It’s the best option for me to stay here tonight…with you,” I said hatefully, trying to push the sound of regret out my voice. “Who knows what else is out there in the woods between here and my house? I guess I’m safer with you than with what could be out there. If you were going to kill me, you would have done so already, unless you like to play with your food before you eat.” He looked up and smiled big enough that I could see the full indentions of his perfectly placed dimples, both of them this time. I thought,
I have to stop thinking about him this way. He’s a damn vampire.

“Glad you see it that way. Why don’t you sit down next to me and warm up by the fire?” He motioned to the ground next to him, but I sat on the opposite side of the fire, trying to stay as far away from him as I could … as I should. The light from the fire confirmed that his dark hair was almost exactly the same color as mine and that his eyes were amethyst-colored, which was so unusual for a vampire. Most vampires have black eyes all of the time. His had been black earlier during his fang show when he was upset with me. The light also helped me figure out how old he looked, visually of course. He looked to be in his mid-twenties, but since he was a vampire, who could tell?

He peered over the fire at me and cautiously said, “I’m not going to answer the questions I know you have. It’s best that you remember on your own if you choose to let yourself.” He paused as if he were thinking of how to say what he wanted to say next. “Being here with me has already unlocked your memories. It’s your choice from this point.” I thought,
How dare he act as though he knows what I’m thinking?
There is that word again, choice. I do have many questions but I will figure them out on my own.

“I don’t have any questions for you,” I said hatefully, “but I wish you’d leave if you aren’t going to kill me.” I sure hoped he didn’t want to kill me, but why wouldn’t he want to kill me? Vampires usually had no remorse for others. I wanted to seem as if I had no interest in him at all, even though I wanted to know how he knew me, why was he sitting there with me rather than sucking the life out of my throat, and most importantly, why he looked at me as he did. It seemed as if he thought I might disappear and he wanted to study every inch of me before I did.

“Anya, you look tired. Why don’t you let me help you get comfortable so you can fall asleep?” I was barely able to make out the blur as he quickly made his way towards me.

“No, I’m good, really.” I sounded like a wimp. What was wrong with me? He was already on the ground next to me, positioning his legs around me. “Really, I have slept on the ground before in colder weather than this. I’m from Russia; I’m sure you know that, too.” I tried to push his body away from mine.

“Anya, stop fighting me. You know where that gets you. It’ll be more comfortable for you this way. Your eyes are turning extremely yellow, so I know you are tired.” I was tired … tired of this night getting weirder and weirder.

I felt him pull me against him, scoop my legs over one of his, and bend his other knee to support my back. He cradled me between his chest and legs and pulled me in tighter. He even gently pulled my hair out from under me to make me more comfortable. I couldn’t help but wonder,
How does he know my body so well?

I squirmed for a second, acting as if I were uncomfortable, but leaning against him was far better than what the ground had to offer. He placed his long leather jacket over me. I thought,
I might as well die comfortably. Killing him or getting information from him is going to have to wait until another day—if I have another day. Information first, kill him second.

I nestled against his chest to get situated. I couldn’t help it. The feel of his body and his lavender smell was calming and all too familiar. I felt his hand stroking my arm, and I didn’t shrug it off. Then I felt him place his lips on my temple. He left them there for a long while. When he finally lifted his lips from me, he pulled me even closer into him placing my head in the crevice of his neck and wrapping his arms securely around me. What was I doing? This went against my upbringing and everything I believed in. I opened up just a little to feel his emotions. He was somber and filled with love. Love was the only word I could use to describe it.

Vladimir and Sorin had caused me to question myself and my place in life. Words like “choose,” “memories,” and “love” filled my brain. Then the most shocking thing of all flashed in my head. It was the dream I’d had of his shadowed silhouette saying, “I’ll find you in your next rise, no matter how long it takes.” There was no way I had ever been or ever would be involved with a vampire. There had to be more pieces to this puzzle and Sorin was the key to putting it all together.

All the questions were running through my head, and my body started to tense up. Sorin pulled me in and squeezed my body and said, “Relax, there’s always tomorrow for you to get your answers.” He was right about tomorrow, I hoped. I couldn’t help but fall asleep in comfort in the arms of a vampire; a vampire that would protect me tonight and return to being my enemy I hunt tomorrow.

I woke feeling sore from the cold and hard ground beneath me. It was dawn and the fire was dead. A quick chill ran through my body as I shivered a little. I pulled myself up, brushing the dirt and grass off my body and face. Opening my senses and looking around, I quickly realized I was alone.
Good,
I thought,
I’m glad last night is over.
Had I wanted Sorin to leave? For a second, I told myself no, but then I shook it off. Of course, I did. We were enemies, and that was how it should stay. I made a vow to myself to fight Sorin to the death if our paths ever crossed again. He needed to be stricken from this earth for making me question myself the way he did. I stood by the creek, deciding whether to go home or to cross and keep going.

I had no idea what I would find if I kept going. I had no idea if I would find who I wanted to be if I kept going. Would my path cross more deceptive creatures like Sorin? I was sure. Would I befriend them? I hoped not. Would my morals and values change as my surroundings became more dynamic? I would like to think not. Would I lose the Beynok ways to fit in with the outside world? No. I needed to go home to my family. I needed to face Vladimir. I needed to face the many choices I could feel coming rather than trying to escape them. I had a feeling they were coming no matter where I ran. I needed my family.

I had enjoyed myself so much during my run the day before that I ran again, but in the direction of my family, instead of away from them. Vladimir, Sorin, Ambrose, Misha’s team, and the werewolves were all I could think about as I ran. Leaving had been selfish. My family needed me, and I needed them. I decided to forget all about my taboo night with the vampire and never speak of it to anyone.

The two guards from Russia should be arriving today, and I really didn’t want to make a bad impression on them for Vladimir’s sake. If my disappearance got back to Russia, it would not make Vladimir look good. I realized it was Sunday and that I had almost lost track of what day it was. It felt that I had been gone much longer than a day. I had learned so much, yet I was more confused than ever. I desperately tried to block everything out and enjoy the rest of my run back home. I knew I was going to be in trouble for leaving, so I needed to enjoy this time while I could.

When the sun was high above my head, I knew I was just about home. I came to a slow walk when I reached the edge of the tree line that led out toward the back of the house. If I closed my eyes and listened, I could make out the sounds of the ocean, but there was no time for enjoyment. In a few minutes, I would be face-to-face with my family and with Vladimir.

I walked up the back porch stairs and hesitated for a second before I pushed the sliding glass door open. What was I going to say? I should have thought about that before now. When I walked in, I only saw Yuri sitting on the couch. He didn’t have to turn for me to know it was him. His wavy, short, chocolate hair and his favorite flannel gave him away. Nothing was on downstairs, not one light or even the TV. He stood up and looked at me with surprise written all over his face.

“Are you okay? We’ve been worried. I’ve been waiting for you to return.” He started to sniff the air as he walked in my direction. “I smell the same strange scent on you that was in the field the night we fought the werewolves.” He hesitated, “I can’t figure out what it is. Why is it on you, Anya?” Yuri stood in front of me and lifted my arm to his nose. He is in his third rise to the east, so by now he had mastered his gift of smell and there was no reason to argue.

What was I going to tell him? I was with a vampire last night? Of course not, no one could know that. I would have to deny it if he accused me. But why didn’t he know already? He knew what vampires smelled like. He should have known without asking. He should have known in the field the night we fought the werewolves. I played it cool, just to see how far I could play this one out.

“Yuri, I’m fine. I just needed to get out of the house yesterday. I’m sorry if I upset everyone. I didn’t mean to.” I wanted him to know how important he is to me, “It was selfish of me to leave as I did. I guess I was a little overwhelmed with everything. You know you’re my closest friend, and if I needed to talk to someone, it would be you. Please don’t worry about me.”

“Anya, you almost look like you’ve been fighting. Have you? And what in the hell is that smell on you? I can’t place it. What is it?”

What could I say? Yuri and I had always had a close friendship. He’d know if I lied. I had to get away from him. “Yuri, I can’t tell you exactly what the smell is. I slept in the woods last night. Please drop it and don’t worry about me. Will you do me this favor?”

Yuri didn’t have time to answer because Vladimir and someone I didn’t recognize walked into the room from the basement. I just looked at Yuri with pleading eyes. I should have been more worried about who the stranger was.

Vladimir’s eyes widened with surprise and quickly recovered. “Anya, you’re back from your morning run. You were gone for an unusual long time today. I guess you were enjoying the beautiful, brisk day.” The command in his voice told me he was pissed.

I quickly replied,” Yes, the day is beautiful and kept me out longer than intended. I’m sorry if I worried you.”

Vladimir brushed over my comment and said, “This is Boris, one of the Russian guards sent here to help. Irena is with the others down in the basement. You’ll meet her shortly. Boris, this is our field leader, Anya.” I had to force myself to act natural to help Vladimir save face, and me, too, for that matter. I held out my hand with a slight nervous smile.

Boris stood as tall as he was stocky. His hair was dark brown and long enough it curled over at the ends in every direction. He had a coarse face with dark circles under his eyes. He might have been good looking, but the scars on his cheeks made him almost unapproachable. The grooves and shape of the scars mirrored werewolf claws. He must have had a narrow escape. Most of the time our bodies will heal themselves, but for him, the damage was too deep.

“Nice to meet you too, Boris. Thank you for traveling such a long distance on such short notice. My family and I appreciate it.” He smiled back at me and shook my hand firmly while saying hello in Russian.

“Sorry, I forget to use English while over in the states. It has been a long time since I left Russia.” It is a Beynok rule to speak the language of the land we are in, so we fit in the best we can. Our kind studies many different languages, and we master as many as we can.

Vladimir looked eager as he said, “Yuri, take Boris down to the sparring room with the others. I have something to discuss with Anya.” Yuri nodded and led Boris out of the room. As Yuri passed through the door, he turned and looked at me with complete curiosity. I couldn’t tell if he was going to talk to Vladimir later or not. He probably hadn’t decided himself.

Vladimir and I stared at each other, waiting for one to say something to the other. It was not my place to talk first. He was the elder. After a second of confusion, I sensed we were no longer elder and student, not after what had happened in my bedroom. He was as unsure as I was. There were still rules, and I was sure going to try to follow some kind of structure in my life, so I waited for him to talk first. Finally, thank God, he opened his mouth. “Anya, I’m sorry about yesterday. I didn’t mean to be so forceful. There are things going on you don’t understand. I’m trying to do what’s best for you and for our kind. Where did you go?”

Finally, a simple question I could answer without having to lie. Lying is something I don’t do. I might kill, but I don’t lie. “I ran, and then I ran some more until I didn’t want to run anymore. I ran until I felt I was far enough away from here … from you.” Well, that was honest enough.

Vladimir looked down as he walked over to me. He reached for my hands and looked into my eyes. I tried to pull my hands away, but his grip was iron strong. We had to make sure not to cause a scene. We had guests, and our family didn’t need to know of our quarrel. I thought,
Is this a lover’s quarrel? Hell, no.
“You don’t have to run from me. You belong with me, by my side forever. Don’t ever leave like that again. We were all worried about you. The others are wondering why you left.” He paused to take a breath. He seemed so overwhelmed, having me back safely and so close. “I told them you must be extremely upset about Misha and his team and Ambrose, and you didn’t want them to see you that way, so you left. I knew you would be back. If I’d known how long you’d be gone, I would have sent Yuri and Nadia looking for you.”

“Well, I’m back. I’m sorry I left the way I did. I don’t know what you want me to say. I’ve never looked at you the way you’re looking at me now. You’re my elder, my leader. I’m not supposed to have feelings for you. I can’t say I have ever had feelings for anyone like that … love.” Sorin’s face flashed in my head.
No, I can’t love a damn vampire, either. I don’t know anything about him. Except for the fact he might be stalking me, and he has the most gorgeous eyes I’ve ever seen. Stop thinking thoughts like that.
I looked away in confusion.

“Anya, what are you thinking about?” Vladimir tried to pull me in, but I resisted.

“Vladimir, I’m going to need time. For now, we need to remain elder and student.” I was sounding like the elder, and he was looking at me like a student.
What the hell? Why is everything the opposite of what it should be?
“I need a shower, and I’ll meet everyone down in the sparring room, if that’s okay with you.”

“That’s fine. Everyone’s eager to see you, and they’re all going along with our story about your disappearance.” Vladimir was still holding my hands, and his eyes were focusing hard on mine. “Anya, we’re supposed to be together. It’s the way the script is written. The sooner you realize this, the sooner we can get on with our lives, and I promise you’ll be happy. You’ll be happier with me than if you choose the other path that is in front of you. Choose the right path, Anya.”

I pulled my hands away abruptly and said, “How do you know what paths are before me? If someone would be straightforward instead of cryptic, it might be easier. I’ll do my best, as I always do.” I walked upstairs to clean up and wondered,
Why is everyone talking in riddles? Why can’t anyone just say what needs to be said? Vladimir says words like choices, love, and scripts, while Sorin asks me to remember. Remember what?
To be honest, I didn’t like giving the vampire a name, but it made it easier to stomach when I talked it over in my head. What did I have to remember? I got in the shower, took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and let the hot water run over my sore body. I know you stand in showers, but today, I wanted to sit and let the shower be like a hot sauna, so I sat. A fast shower was just not an option.

What if I had a partner in my first rise? Beynoks don’t talk about their past. We live for the future. I’ve been told when we pass and rise again, we rise knowing if we did or didn’t find our partner during our past rise. Looking at it now, I wasn’t sure if I had. I’d always been certain I’d had no love, and I was sure the connection I had with Vladimir was not the connection I’d have with my partner. Don’t ask me how I know, I just do. There was something there, though, but I couldn’t put my finger on it, and of course, he was gorgeous, which didn’t help. It wasn’t possible for Vladimir to be my partner, anyway. He was full-spirited and had a partner once. Why was Vladimir insisting I love him? The feelings I’d had with Sorin were unbelievably strong, and I’d blamed him for his emotions erupting in me, causing all this confusion. Besides, it was wrong for me to feel that way about a vampire. I figured, once everything calmed down, I should set out to kill him just to prove he meant nothing to me.

My feet and fingers became wrinkled from sitting in the shower so long. I needed to hurry to get downstairs. I had no idea how much time had passed, and I didn’t want to bring any more attention to myself than I had already. I dried off and applied some lotion to my body. Sleeping outside had dried my skin out. I put on some stretch pants, a clean workout bra, and a T-shirt. I brushed my hair and teeth, put on socks and sneakers, and walked downstairs.

When I walked into the sparring room, Nickolai and Yuri were finally having their match. Nickolai had challenged Yuri earlier but was interrupted by the werewolf hunt. Yuri had Nickolai down by his throat, which was unusual considering Nickolai’s strength. He is the strongest of us all on the field team. For a second, my team’s eyes were on me, but then they quickly went back to the match since I was not supposed to be a shock to them. As far as the newly arrived guards knew, my run was an everyday event, which is true, but they surely didn’t need to know it had turned into an overnight stay.

The glance Yuri gave me gave Nickolai the upper hand. Nickolai threw Yuri off him and kicked him in midair. When Yuri landed hard on the mat, the breath was knocked out of him. Nickolai held Yuri down on the mat with as much force as he could. Nickolai didn’t release Yuri’s body until he hit the mat twice, indicating the match was over. I was disappointed for Yuri. It would have been nice if Nickolai had been put in his place.

Everyone clapped for Nickolai. They had to; it was polite. “Anya, come here. I would like you to meet Irena,” Vladimir said. “Anya, this is Irena … Irena, this is our field leader, Anya.” I shook her hand. She was very tall and extremely thin with short, red, spiky hair, dyed, of course. Beynoks usually have brown to black hair, and Russian guards are usually more conservative looking. Not only did she have red, spiky hair, her clothes screamed whore. She wore tight pants and a tight shirt, showing way too much cleavage. What a combo. I hoped my face didn’t show how shocked I was.