Esra (2 page)

            They told her enough details to keep her from thirst, but not, she regarded, enough to fully quench it.  Whether they thought that it would be too painful for Esra to hear more, or it was too hard for them to tell, she did not know.  They seemed to be comfortable describing the looks and characteristics of each, but not the deeper facets of their personalities or what they really believed in.  Now that she was twenty, Esra had learned to accept her parents’ fate and appreciate being raised by such wonderful grandparents, even if they decided to withhold some information regarding her past. 

            “What really amazes me is how I could’ve grown up surrounded by such order and yet become so chaotic.  No matter how much grandmother pins and twists my hair, it will come undone before reaching the bottom of the stairs.  Shoelaces triple knotted in the morning won’t make it past breakfast.  And how I can manage to get an orange stain on my dress when the only thing around fer miles is blankets of soft white Snow, is a complete and utter mystery.  No wonder grandfather calls me ‘his little vagabond’.”

Esra was also unusually tall and towered two hands’ breadth above the average woman in town, even surpassing some of the men.  Her extreme growth spurts seemed to contribute to her stumbling, though she never quite grew out of her clumsiness.

            It did not help that her best friend was one of the most graceful and lovely creatures around.  A Great Wolf, she had long, dark grey fur that shimmered in the Sun, reflecting a black sheen that gave her a sleek, polished look.  A thin line of pure white ran from the tip of her snout and curled behind both ears like an ancient helm. She was tall and solid, the contour of her body reaching Esra’s midsection.  She had paws that were the size of Esra’s palm, and a strong tail that stung like a whip when it joyfully thumped back and forth.  When anyone showed an overly-energetic interest in scratching her, Meshok would defy her usual elegant composure to flop over heavily and squirm from side to side until the designated party would give her the brisk belly rubbing she was owed.

            Leaning back from the Water’s edge, Esra reclined back into the Grass as Meshok shuffled over to lay her head on her lap.  The Great Wolf stared up into her friend’s eyes with a pleading gaze.

            “Ye’d like to hear a story, would ye?”  Meshok sighed in agreement and closed her eyes, breath rasping noisily from her flared nostrils.  “The one about how we met, eh?  Well, I suppose I don’t get tired of telling that one.  After all, ye know I’ve always been the independent sort, preferring to wander the countryside in solitude.  I never found it necessary to have companionship throughout most of the day, although I make friends easily with the townsfolk when I mean to.  It was only after becoming dreadfully lost while daydreaming that I had a stroke of luck to give me a dear friend. 

            I found ye in the forest two springs ago, whimpering by yerself next to a mother dead and cold.  The other pups must have wandered off or fallen prey to some other Animal.  Ye were small, about the size of a fat field Rabbit, and yer coat was a much lighter grey.  I hadn’t the faintest clue that the plump bundle of fur before me was a Great Wolf, only hearing tell of such beasts in old stories and such.  I tread lightly towards ye, so as not to cause a fright.  I could hardly believe it when my clumsy feet brought me within two strides of yer mother.  Ye were just as stunned by my silent and steady arrival as I was.  Seconds after bending down to scoop yer little furry self up, ye let out a growl like a Bear and bit down on my forearm like a full grown Vernok.”

            Meshok groaned happily in recognition of the offense, perhaps pleased with her ferociousness.

            “Ye think that’s funny, do ye?  Well, if ye remember, after I  screamed to Mother Oak in glorious pain, I pulled back my arm and lifted yer little pup-ness entirely off the ground.  Ye were dangling there like a Rabbit ready fer the pot.  But the skin on my forearm where yer small, sharp teeth had clamped down tore something awful and I shook my arm free.  Yer fat little body thudded heavily on yer back and ye were kicking yer legs like a newborn baby Lamb until ye finally rolled over.  Ha!

“Anyway, the jolt of pain seemed to invigorate me, and I ripped a piece of my underskirt off and wound it around my bloody arm, more determined than ever to take ye home.  We sat there, staring at each other intently, neither moving.  After a long moment ye walked towards me with a deliberate and pompous stride, snapping yer teeth in a display of daring.  I admired yer audacity, as ye seemed to think ye were a much larger Animal.  And I can relate to wanting to take on something people think is too big fer ye, I do it often.  So I took the opportunity to swiftly pluck ye off the ground with my good arm and quickly wrapped ye in the folds of my skirt.  From that moment on, we were an inseparable pair.”

            Meshok stretched contentedly before gazing up at Esra, willing her to continue on to her favorite part. 

            “As ye know, I didn’t know at first that ye were a Great Wolf, as they were believed to be a dead race.  No one had seen one since the age of King Rїvan.  But it became very apparent within a few short weeks that ye were no ordinary Hound.  The size of yer paws were unlike anything I had ever seen.  My grandparents warned me against speaking about ye in town, as someone may think themselves clever and try to capture ye.  Or do worse, since the hide of a Great Wolf would be worth an indiscriminate amount of coin to a hunter or trapper.  But ye did yer part by showing yerself to very few people, as if ye understood this danger.  Besides, I always said ye were less a pet than ye were an independent, headstrong friend.  I learned after a few short Moons never to worry over a dinner not eaten, as my new companion would come and go as she pleased, hunting and wandering, sometimes staying away fer a night.  The rest of the time ye spent curled up at the foot of my bed, snoring loudly, or basking by the Fire after eating three portions of Lamb.  Grandfather and grandmother took a quick liking to ye, even though ye were an inconsistent creature.  Although it wouldn’t have mattered since by this time I was fully and deeply devoted to my new friend.”

Pausing for a moment to let the memory wash over them, Esra could see the fiery little creature in her mind as if it were yesterday.  Smiling, she slowly stretched and lifted Meshok’s head from her lap so she could stand. Steadying the bucket with her free hand, they began the slow walk back to the house.  Esra always had to concentrate when she fetched Water, a seemingly simple task.  Her lack of grace usually meant that at least a third of the Water would slosh over the rim of the bucket on her return, making it necessary for her to make two trips to the cool edge of the stream.

            Her grandmother, who always seemed to sense when Esra was near the house, was standing with the thick wooden door propped behind her.  “Looks like we’ll be gettin’ some rain.  Better hope yer grandfather gets home in time to avoid the brunt of it.”

            He had left an hour earlier to make a trip into town for some spices.  They had spent the day yesterday drying and wrapping Herbs to trade at the general store.  Esra looked outside the window at the clear blue skies and tried to understand how her grandmother could always make such unfounded yet accurate predictions.  She had no doubt that there would be a storm and that her grandfather would be back before it started.  Nothing, not even an act of nature, could catch her grandparents off guard.

            After making the required second journey for more Water, she took her place at her grandmother’s side to help with the Vegetables.

            “How go yer studies with Cane?”

            “Oh, good,” Esra nodded.  “We’re currently studying Elvish history, which I must admit is very interesting.  But I daresay I shouldn’t get too involved, fer Cane never does like to stay on any one topic fer too long.”

            Her grandmother nodded silently in agreement as she poured the second bucket deftly into the cooking pot on the Fire.  Despite her small, frail frame, she still had the strength and endurance to continue her self-sufficient way of life.  She was a woman of structure and habit, finding comfort in completing her daily tasks through repetitive, ritualized movements.  Every morning she swept up her long white hair into a tight bun and washed her face with Lavender Water, patting it dry three times.  She took the folded apron from the chair next to her bed and tied the familiar knot at the small of her back before sliding on her boots, left one first.  The only hint of deviation from this order and tradition was when her face crinkled into joyous chaos when she smiled. 

In spite of all this tenacity, Esra worried how much longer her grandmother’s strength would last and each season expected to see the decline begin.  She looked at her grandmother, now stirring the pot in steady, circular motions and decided it was as good a time as any to bring up a delicate topic.

            “Grandmother, I know that we have discussed this before, but I have been thinking more on the subject, and I wish to make a proposal.”

            She gave Esra a tired smile, sensing what was coming. “Ye do, eh?”

            “Yes,” Esra stated, gathering courage. “Ye and grandfather are getting older, and although I enjoy my studies with Cane, it pains me to think that I am not here more to help ye with the chores and the farming.  Some of the work that grandfather does in the fields would be difficult fer one half his age and twice his size.  However, I realize that my studies are important to the both of ye, although what future it would bring me, I don’t know.  There is no need fer a teacher in the village and I have no intention of leaving here to pursue knowledge in a larger city.  Nor do I have the urge to become assistant to a merchant or tutor fer the wealthy.  So instead I will offer ye both a compromise.  Why not let me cut my time with Cane in half?  I could go there fer three afternoons a week instead of six.  I will still be able to have my lessons but I can be here more to help.

            “I am not in any way suggesting that ye are unable to do things fer yerself,“ she added quickly, “but I would like to be able to feel that I pull my weight in this family.  And as wonderful as it is to be studying new things all the time, it seems fairly useless.”

            Esra paused to gauge her grandmother’s reaction, who had continued to stir the soup pot in a slow, rhythmic motion.

            “And how long have ye been preparing to say that?” Her grandmother chuckled.

            “Aye, a few nights,” Esra flushed red.  “I’ve been practicing my delivery to Meshok.  She’s a fair audience but doesn’t give much in the way of advice.”

            Meshok lifted her head from the rug where she was sleeping at the sound of her name and yawned largely to show her disinterest in Esra’s sarcasm.

            “My dear child,” her grandmother said, leaning the spoon against the side of the pot and coming to place her hand on Esra’s shoulder. “Ye really needn’t worry so much.  I am still very capable, as is yer grandfather.  Yer studies are very important to us, and they will someday prove to be very useful, whether ye know it or not.  Yer right about some of the field work being too hard, but it is also too much fer ye.  We have already talked to Baelin, and he will be coming by now once or twice a week to handle some of the heavier work.  We offered to pay him, but instead he asked that we allow him the use of our Fariel, since he has no Horse of his own.  So yer worries are unnecessary and although I applaud yer sensitivity, we are managing just fine.  Nothing would make yer grandfather and I more proud than if ye continue yer learning with Cane as planned.”

            It was hard to argue with her grandmother, especially when she spoke so plainly.  But Esra was not ready to concede defeat just yet. 

            “Then I must ask, at least, what is the purpose of my studies?  I am not willing to leave Sorley.  Ye and grandfather are all I know.  And while my learning…” she tried to think of the best way to describe her feeling, “fulfills me, it is not, as I said, very useful here.”

            “Well, I regret that ye feel that way,” her grandmother dissented with a frown. “But Esra, ye must understand that someday, maybe after we are gone, ye may want to leave this place.  And even if ye do not, it is not fair to say that this knowledge is ‘useless’.  Training of the mind is just as important as training of the body.  They may not produce the same visible effect.  Sow a crop in a field and ye will have a harvest to show fer it.  But the results of wisdom are much harder to see, harder to measure. Ye must trust that yer grandfather and I are doing what’s best fer ye.  We want ye to have this opportunity, and despite what ye think, ye were born fer such things.”

            Her grandmother took her hand from Esra’s shoulder and returned to the soup pot, indicating that the conversation was officially over.  Had Esra been more inclined towards stubbornness, she would have argued further.  But she was generally open-minded and adaptable, perhaps recompense for a childhood without any parents or siblings, or due to her studies with Cane which forced one to see things from multiple perspectives.  There were still many times she wished she could be more obstinate, especially in situations like this, but she had an appreciation for knowing when acceptance would serve her better. 

She also recognized that what her grandmother had said was true, especially about her talent for learning.  Aside from appearing like a wandering vagrant, Esra maintained a rare grace of mind.  She was clever, insightful, and soaked up knowledge without abandon or prejudice.  Even though Esra had few friends her own age, all the townsfolk respected her cleverness and foresight.  She was especially regarded for her skill in preventing heated arguments between wives and their drunken husbands with a well-timed piece of wit.

            But Esra also had a habit of daydreaming mercilessly, her head constantly full of imaginations from books and her own making.  This greatly added to her distracted and accident prone state, and it was not unusual for her to be unable to identify a certain Tree she passed twice a day or the color of the general store she visited once a week.  And the amount of times she had gotten lost on their own property was astounding.