Espino, Stacey - Midlife Ménage [Ride 'em Hard 5] (Siren Publishing Ménage Amour) (13 page)

“Where you going?” Wendy spilled out onto the porch from the house, bracing the railing in both hands.

He just shook his head, taking a drag so she could see. Why should he care anymore? He no longer cared about his health and didn't have to worry about the risk of setting Wendy's crop ablaze. Soon he’d be nothing more than a memory. He boarded the truck, slamming the door shut behind him. When he started up the engine, she ran across the lot toward him.

“Don’t go!” she called out.

If he stopped now, he’d never leave, and she deserved better. He didn’t look her in the eyes as he hit the gas, leaving the one place he thought he could finally call home.

Chapter Eleven

Wendy felt part of herself slipping away as Jackson’s truck left in a cloud of dust. She never expected she’d feel so strongly for a younger man, any man. But she now realized, even more than last night, that she needed him. She had no telephone number, no address, no way to find him again. Desperation crept into her heart. She couldn’t even follow him because her girls took the truck.

She stormed around back. Wendy may not have told Wade she had feelings for Jackson, but that didn’t give him the right to scare him off. That was the only explanation. A few minutes ago Jackson was ready give her the world, and now he was gone.

“What have you done? Jackson just tore out of here like a bat out of hell,” she shouted when she spotted Wade leaning against the barn, chewing nonchalantly on a piece of straw.

“It’s not my doing. The boy probably just saw the light, realized he wasn’t ready to provide for a new family.”

“And where’d he get that idea? You no doubt.”

He pushed off from the wooden barn wall and moved toward her. His eyes were transfixed on hers. Even with her yelling, he wasn’t affected in the least. He was tall, commanding, all male. “Darlin’, think about what you want here. I’m not saying money is everything, but I can give you things Jackson never can.”

“I don’t care about
things.”

“What are you saying? Are you choosing him over me?” For the briefest moment she saw a little boy in his eyes.

She massaged her temples. “God help me, but I want both of you.”

There was a long span of silence. “
Really…
”

“I’m sorry. I can’t help how I feel. I never thought I could move on from the past, but for a brief glimpse I saw hope. God brought both of you into my life for a reason. I couldn’t give up on Jackson, even if I said yes to you.” She wanted to crawl into a hole, maybe rewind the past couple months and start over. It was easier when she felt nothing compared to all this regret and longing.

“You’re right, you can’t.” He pulled her into a tight embrace when she expected him to push her away. Wade had just scared off Jackson, so she couldn’t imagine he’d enjoy hearing what she had to say. “And if I claim to love you half as much as that cowboy, I need to do whatever it takes to keep you happy.”

* * * *

He had one chance to make amends and put everything right with Wendy, Jackson, and himself. While Wendy assumed Jackson would be long gone, on the road to the next rodeo, he knew better. There were places riders socialized, and he had a good feeling the cowboy would be drowning his sorrows about now. Wade felt like a royal asshole, but he knew the key to salvation rested in his next moves.

The country-and-western bar was filled to capacity. With the rodeo packing up, the riders and fans were getting in their last bit of fun before moving on. He scanned the room, looking over most of the heads to try and spot Jackson. There were a couple other places he could check before giving up, but this bar was the most promising.

He recognized some faces, but most were strangers to him.

“Laweson, that you?” A young blond who often did seasonal work on his ranch came up to greet him.

“How’re you doing, Carter?”

“Good.” He smiled, patting Wade on the shoulder. He smelled of alcohol. “Will you be needed help with the fall branding?”

Normally he’d say yes. It was a massive undertaking for a herd the size of his, but he wasn’t sure if he’d need all the extra help yet. Everything in his life was on hold, balancing on his next actions. “Not sure yet, but I have your number.”

They separated, and Wade pushed through the throngs of cowboys, the twang of country music drowning out the multitude of conversations. Then he spotted him in a far corner. Jackson leaned over his arms at a dimly lit table, a bottle in front of him.

“They’re not supposed to give you the whole bottle,” he said, standing across from him. Jackson looked up, not bothering to lift his head all the way.

“What do you want?”

“Wendy’s upset with me that you left.”

He shrugged. “Ain’t my problem. You said your piece, and I listened. It’s over now. You won.”

Wade pulled up a chair and dragged it so they were sitting a breath apart. “Listen, I’ve made a mistake.” He took a cleansing breath, hoping the truth would set things right. “I talked to you about money and providing everything Wendy needs, but the God’s honest truth is that I’d give it all up for her. You may not have the financial means that I do, but you love her. You have passion and youth, things I’ve lost long ago.” Wade sat straighter, feeling uncomfortable, but at least Jackson was paying attention now. “I was scared, assuming she’d choose the better man—you.”

Jackson chuckled, twirling the amber liquid around his glass, and watching it with morbid fascination. “I left because you were the better man. You can offer her money, security, and a home. I have nothing to give.”

“If I could trade places with you, I would. I’d give up my wealth to get back twenty years of my youth. It’s no wonder Wendy looks at you with a hunger in her eyes.”

“She looks at you like a woman in love. I’d rather that. I’m the young joke of a cowboy, good for only one thing.”

They ended up talking for hours. Wade joined him in drinking, and reminiscing on childhoods past, farming, the rodeo, and of course, the elusive Mrs. McCay. By the time he paused to find out the time, it was past dinner hour. Wendy would wonder where on earth he’d disappeared to.

“If I go back alone, she’ll skin me alive.”

“You really expect she wants both of us? Surely she’ll have to choose eventually.”

“The woman knows what she wants,” said Wade. “She made it plain that she needs both of us. Are you willing to disappoint her?”

Jackson ran a hand through his hair. “Sharing?” he said reflectively.

“It’s not the worst outcome. I still wonder if that woman is capable of love, but at least she’s not turning us away.”

“I know I love her. If she needs two men to dote over her, then I’ll deal with it.”

Wade was surprised Jackson easily agreed to a ménage relationship. Most men had insecurities or issues with control. It appeared the young cowboy was confident enough in himself to jump in, no questions asked. As for Wade, he’d mellowed over the years. He was only interested in peace and the love of a country woman at this point in his life. He’d be turning fifty soon, so his time for recklessness was behind him.

* * * *

Wendy had paced the shine off her old wooden floors as she waited for a phone call or visit from either Jackson or Wade. She was worried sick. Worried she may never see the young cowboy again, and worried she’d estranged herself from her neighbor. She’d admitted to wanting both men, so the worst of it was in the open. It was such a lewd thing to say aloud. But it’s what she wanted. Even with all the worry, she fantasized about taking Jackson and Wade at the same time , having their lips, hands, and cocks all over her body.

She paced some more. How would she ever sleep tonight if she didn’t hear back? As the daylight hours slipped into evening, the red-and-orange sunset fading to black, she had more than enough time to think and reflect. Wendy wasn’t accustomed to dating or schooled in how to treat a man. She’d been so set on survival and mothering mode, that she forgot all about love, sex, and the delicate bond between a man and woman. Now that she’d been awakened, she had to remind herself of the many changes she needed to undertake. She had to soften around the edges, give as much as she took. If those two cowboys ever showed up on her doorstep again, she’d demonstrate her love for them.

After a quick glance out the window, she walked to the hall mirror. She messed with her hair, arranging it to be the most flattering. Wendy had never given much thought to her appearance, but now she felt the need to be appealing in Wade’s and Jackson’s eyes. She never wore makeup, and jeans were the staple of her wardrobe. Her mind wandered, and then she recalled the summer dress she once wore to her cousin’s wedding. Men appreciated femininity in a woman.

Another half hour later and the bobbing light from a truck pulling up flooded the front window of the house. Her heart leapt. Then the one thought she hadn’t contemplated flashed in her head. What if only one of them came back?

The door knocking sent her pulse racing. “Who is it?” she called out from the other side.

“It’s me, Wade.” She sighed in relief, but also assumed he couldn’t find Jackson. Although her anger for Wade had diminished as she waited, her sadness had increased.

She opened the door and found both her men standing there in the shadows of her porch.
Her men?
It sounded odd, but also right. They were hers. As soon as she’d emotionally committed to them, she considered Wade and Jackson to be a necessary part of her life.

“He found me,” said Jackson. He looked tired, defeated, and she blamed herself for it.

“Thank God for that.” She stood aside, allowing them entry. Tonight she’d have the house to herself again, and the possibilities had her folds moistening. The men brought the freshness of the night air inside, along with their subtle cologne and hint of alcohol.

Wade stopped dead in front of her after she closed the door. With his cowboy boots on, and her in her bare feet, Wade appeared like a giant looking down on her. His size and rugged masculinity aroused her already hyperaware body. “I’ve never seen you in a dress. You look mighty beautiful.”

“Blue’s your color, darlin’. It brings out your eyes,” said Jackson.

They both assessed her, their gazes roaming up and down the fitted robin’s-egg blue dress. It had spaghetti straps and a plunging neckline. She felt foolish wearing it at her age. It had been wrapped in plastic in the back of her closet for almost ten years. But the way the two men stared, their eyes hooded, lips parted, made her feel like a princess. A young, attractive, desired princess made for two knights.

“I put it on with the two of you in mind. I’m glad you like it.” She clenched down hard to keep the thin stream of fluid from escaping her pussy. Wendy wanted to see those broad shoulders and hard chest without the layer of plaid. She wanted to see both their mighty cocks, hard and aroused for her. As soon as she had the thought, she instinctively glanced down at Wade’s crotch. His cock was bulging against the denim, as if the material had been shrink-wrapped over his erection. She swallowed hard. Both men were blessed with endowment.

They moved in on her, like spirits possessed their bodies. She walked back until she hit the open brick wall beside the airtight fireplace. It was cool and rough on her bare shoulder blades. Jackson reached out and felt her arm as if she might be made of silk. He then trailed his fingers down the length of her arm, sending tingles through her body. When he reached her hand and directed it toward him, she thought he’d kiss her knuckles like a gentleman. Instead, he brought it to his groin, placing her palm over his cock. It was a hard, impressive package, begging to be let loose. The young stud was ready to go again after fucking her in the morning. She imagined he’d get hard on command, anytime she needed satisfaction. Like now.

“That’s what you do to me, Wendy. I don’t care about your age or the fact you keep pushing me away. There’s nothing that will sour my love for you.”

Wade stroked her hair, petting her, in his own world of fascination. Both men appeared equally smitten and neither fought for exclusivity. They were already sharing her, arousing her. She felt surrounded by so much cowboy heat that she was becoming drunk on desire. How far would they go? How far did she dare to push them?

“I don’t want to drive you away. Either of you. I don’t want to be alone anymore. I’m tired of fighting, tired of not really living.” They made her feel loved, special, beautiful, and cared for. It was a refreshing change to her usual existence. If Jackson ran off again, or Wade turned his back on her, she wouldn’t be able to cope with the loss. Not after having a sample of what she was missing.