Escaping: A Mafia Romance (The O'Keefe Family Collection #2) (14 page)

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Exhaling
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Book Three in The O’Keefe Family Collection

One.

The Silence of Sadness

Fallyn stared up at the ceiling, not sure how she’d found herself in Declan’s house. She didn’t recall who’d driven her there or if she’d answered their many questions that had been shouted at her. She couldn’t feel anything, couldn’t speak, couldn’t move. She simply stared at the white ceiling and pictured the angels she’d made love underneath in Italy.

Made love to her half-brother.

Fallyn went back to the land of no words and no thoughts. She ignored Declan, who held her hand and whispered his apology over and over again. She ignored Killian, who could barely lift his head to look at her as he sat at the foot of the bed. She ignored Danny, Finn and Seamus, who asked her key questions she knew she should be answering. The only thing she did that showed any life at all was when Carrigan brought her a shot of whiskey, and she launched it across the room, not blinking as the glass shattered all over Declan’s wall and hardwood floor.

She loved Vince beyond words, beyond reason. She’d chosen him, and still it hadn’t been enough. Patrick O’Keefe wasn’t her father, which was the thing he’d been trying to tell her all along. She’d thought he was being forgetful, but he was trying to warn her in his own broken way. Papa D had been her father, which explained why Papa D had never hesitated to treat her like a daughter.

The sun went down, and Fallyn only moved from the bed to throw up and use the restroom. She only allowed Killian to touch her, trusting him to be silent and not look on her face as he led her back to the bed. She drank only when he brought her water, but ignored the others. It wasn’t out of spite. It was that when they spoke, she couldn’t understand a word of what they said to her. It was all white noise. Even Killian couldn’t be understood, but she was so lost, she knew she needed at least one beacon to hold to as her world crashed down around her.

Learning that her mother had an affair before she was born was traumatic enough. The story had been that her parents had split up for half a year for untold reasons, with Mama leaving with Killian when she found out she was pregnant. She came back with a baby, and the boys being boys didn’t stop to count the months, or that Fallyn was the only blue-eyed one among them. Patrick O’Keefe had known his wife stepped out on him with his best friend, but when he’d seen Fallyn, the girl he’d always wanted in a sea of boys, all was forgotten. Fallyn had been raised as his daughter, though the patriarch of the D’Amatos – their family’s rival – had been the last one to sleep with Mrs. O’Keefe before she left the home.

Fallyn hadn’t known when it was exactly that she’d fallen hard for the cold and distant Vince D’Amato. No one had an inkling about the affair except for Declan, who had wanted to warn his sister privately, but hadn’t known she would elope so quickly.

Now Fallyn was awash in pain and depression, secretly suspecting she might be pregnant, and unwilling to talk or eat. She simply stared at the ceiling, ignoring the world as it bustled around her, prodding her to wakefulness she simply could not accept.

Days passed, but Fallyn didn’t care. She drank water only when her eldest brother Killian propped her up in his arms and fed her little sips, but he was unable to look at her, so deep was the shame she’d dove headfirst into.

So Killian held his little sister, the fifteen years between their births feeling like a minute between twins. He felt her pain but wouldn’t ease it, keeping his lips shut out of respect for her breakdown. He delegated the upkeep of her business to Danny, who took Fallyn’s phone and ignored all of Vince’s desperate calls.

Though Fallyn and Carrigan had no closure to their months-long fight, Carrigan pushed all the animosity and disappointment aside by day two. After his shift serving his community with his police badge, he drove straight to Declan’s house to give Killian and Declan a break. His sister had been his best friend, and no matter what broken state that friendship had devolved to, Carrigan couldn’t bear her suffering alone. “I’m here, Fally.”

She didn’t acknowledge he’d spoken, or that Killian had left the room for the first time in hours. She blinked up at the ceiling, unshowered and unaware. Even as her body shifted when Carrigan slid into Declan’s bed beside her, she paid him no mind. She was lost in her agony.

Carrigan wrapped his arms around her, his eyes shut tight as he held his sister in her utter defeat. “I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I shouldn’t have beaten Vince so bad that day I found out. There are a million other ways I could’ve handled that. I don’t want to hurt you; I only wanted to hurt him. But I saw only after the fact that when I beat on him, it only broke you away from me. I don’t want that. I don’t want you going through all this crap without me.” He kissed her forehead. “So I’m here. I’m here until you feel like talking about it.”

Carrigan recalled their many long silent walks together after their mother had died. They kept close to each other – the only two who didn’t want to discuss the horrors they felt. In that silence, they helped each other heal. None of the others understood it. They all wanted to talk and reminisce, which only made Fallyn and Carrigan withdraw further into their shells of depression. They’d saved each other through their quiet companionship, and Carrigan was determined not to abandon his sister to her silence this time.

“When you were a little girl, you used to get so afraid of thunderstorms. Mom and Dad would send you back to your bed, but you used to sneak in with Killian or me instead.” He brushed her auburn tangles away from her face. “I remember holding you while you freaked out, and singing you songs until you fell asleep.” He rolled on his side to cradle her in his arms. “Would that help now?”

Fallyn shook her head slowly, which was the first communicating she’d managed since she’d shut down.

“Okay. I’ll just stay with you, then – storm or not.” So Carrigan held his sister, kissing her cheek and clutching her like a teddy bear until they both fell asleep.

A hush fell over the O’Keefes as the days stretched on. Declan’s house became the place they flowed in and out of, having family meetings without Fallyn being cognizant of anything around her, save for Carrigan when he came home from work every evening to hold her. Carrigan rubbed feeling into her arms and tried to press life into her heart, but she remained in her silent depression. Eventually her arms allowed themselves to cling to Carrigan when he was there, but she drifted back to oblivion when he was not.

It was a week later before Killian moved her. “I’ve got you. Don’t you worry. We’re just going on a little drive.” He lifted his sister who felt too thin and frail. He worried that he’d not been strict enough and forced her somehow to eat something. Killian slowly carried her through the dark of night to his car and buckled her in. “You have to see Vince and set him straight,” Killian explained, taking each turn from Declan’s house to his father’s with care. “He’s lost it, Fal. I think we all thought he was using you to bait us, but he’s a man possessed.” He wiped his nose on his sleeve. “It’s out of hand now. When Danny went to help Jen with the inventory at your bakery, Vince and Tony jumped him. He’s demanding we give you up to get Danny back.” When this garnered no reaction, Killian continued without looking at Fallyn. “Don’t worry. We won’t give you up, but if he just sees you and lets us explain things to him, then we can get Danny back and Vince will probably leave you with us.” He glanced over to see the same glazed eyes that had not registered emotion in over a week. “Nothing? You’re still gone? Come on, Fal. Vince kidnapped your brother! Say something!”

Fallyn couldn’t find words. She hadn’t bathed or changed her clothes or eaten in too many days. All she wanted to do was sleep, but the restlessness kept her from even that kindness. She simply stared ahead of her, lost to the world.

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Exhaling

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Tuesday Embers

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Tuesday Embers also writes fantasy fiction under the name
Mary E. Twomey

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