Entwine (13 page)

Once her underwear was off, she didn’t let him kiss her. She leant back, arching her back up to hold her hips at a better angle for him.

“Fuck, Sarah,” he moaned and leaned forward, kissing down her stomach to settle, finally, between her legs.

His tongue was warm yet cool against her. She was on fire and aching. He licked in circles and then dribbled on her to lick that around, and mix it in with her own wetness. The sight of him doing it made her buck, but he grabbed her hips and said, “Hold still.”

His erect penis, dangling with no attention, made her wild, and she struggled to turn her thoughts into coherent words. “Need it,” she gasped, bucking around his tongue. “I want to, Malik.”

“Fuck. I’m so hard for you,” he said.

She felt wetter instantly, and found herself saying something she never thought she would. “Show me how hard. Fuck me.”

He slapped the side of her ass, and she squealed. It stung her everywhere, including between her legs, and the sensation was so great she needed it again. “Do it … again.”

He stuck one finger in her, and glided it in and out with little effort. He stuck two fingers in with the same result, and before Sarah wondered if three could fit, she felt the tip of his shaft enter her and she screamed out in pleasure as he thrust in her for the first time.

Sarah’s eyes rolled; she couldn’t contain her feelings. It was as if they were too great for her body, and it hurt. She needed more everything; more pleasure, pain, and heat. She wanted to climax higher, longer, harder.

He started pumping in her and she arched her back again, screaming. He slapped her ass. She noticed the pattern and screamed out again. He slapped her.

She felt the edge of a climax starting.

Sarah worked him. She told him he was so good, and he thrust harder. She bucked her hips, held her body up with her fists to angle better, and he thrust even deeper. She said it still wasn’t deep enough, so he clutched her hips and played her like a puppet, pulling her over his length, groaning harder each time.

Sarah began to tighten. Tingles had swept deep within her and the pleasurable pain bursting inside her begged for release.

“Can I come?” she asked.

“Not yet, just before me.”

She clenched her thighs around him greedily, not caring because she couldn’t wait. He noticed and slipped out.

The feeling of his length withdrawing almost made her come, but he was gone, and now she couldn’t finish.

“I said,” and he cocked his head, “not yet.” He looked at her, between her legs, and travelled up to her eyes when he tutted, and added the words, “Impatient girl.”

“Wait,” she said.

He stilled, his erection standing out at her as she sat up and slipped her feet to the ground. She turned away from him and bent down over the bench top, holding on the far edge. She wiggled into a comfortable position and then said, “Okay?”

Despite being submissive, power built and made her tremble with delight at the thought of being able to give him even more pleasure.

“Fuck.” She thought she heard him mumble. Then, she had the strangest sensation. His tongue? It licked a streak up her leg, and up her inner thighs until he licked to her clit. Then his cock was in her again, and she let him know how shaken she was, how affected she was by him. Her voice quavered and it took two tries to say, “Is it okay like this?”

He grunted louder than the rest.

“Harder, Malik. I need you. So bad.”

He pumped into her harder and faster until she couldn’t wait, and she cried, “I’m coming.”

She felt him build and build until he groaned, “Fuck, I’m coming too.”

He held her hips tightly as she rode the end of her climax, and he made it grow longer as his thrusts went faster. She was still shaking when he eventually stilled, then pulled out of her.

When she looked at him, she was worried to see what his expression would look like. She loved every moment of their being together, but she didn’t have the confidence to ask how he felt. She was only just twenty-two and he was thirty-four, an ex-husband, father, and a well-to-do lawyer. She had a moment of doubt, wondering if he wanted her simply because she was young. Maybe he just missed the days when he didn’t have these big, messed up issues.

But then he took her hand from beside her leg, and led her to the bathroom where he spent the next twenty minutes lathering her, massaging her neck, shoulders and back and making her come twice more, and she realised he was doing this purely for her benefit because it gave him so much pleasure—and that was all he wanted to experience.

• • •

NOW

Malik left the bathroom as Sarah changed back into her clothes. Despite the intimacy of Malik touching her in the most private of ways, she needed to be alone, to have her own space, afterwards.

She looked in the mirror at her soaking wet hair. Dead straight when it was wet, it hung just below her breasts, and she found herself wondering what length Malik would like it. She grabbed the ends and folded them up, so they touched her shoulders. She looked cute but about nineteen now, so she let go of her hair and tied it back in a low twist so the water wouldn’t drip. Her pale face, sans make-up, made her too fresh and young looking, especially with her hair pulled back neatly. Sarah reached out to touch her reflection in the mirror, but stopped short of contact with the screen.

She looked away, hoping her young age wouldn’t drive Malik away.

“How’d you go? All okay in there?” His tone cut away some of Sarah’s worries.

“All good.”

She came out and linked her fingers in his. That moment had changed them, unlocked an intimacy between them she knew she’d never let go of. It was strange that being with Malik made her past clear to her, now. She’d liked her previous relationships. The best ones, like Nicholas, were amazing, but she’d never found someone to match her. Someone to match the intensity in her eyes, or stare at her face and be able to read what she thought or felt. And she’d definitely not had a man who overwhelmed her emotions and fired up a heat inside of her, like Malik had, when he was intimate with her.

Sarah found herself wondering how long she’d been lost in their own world, careless of the one going on around them. She looked at her mobile. It was just past nine. Not too late, luckily. She didn’t want to give away too many clues to her mum as to where she’d been tonight. It was early enough to say she went past K-mart on the way home, or caught up with a friend for coffee.

“What are you thinking?” Malik said, bringing her fingers up to kiss them while they were still mingled with his.

Warmth spread through her when he did that. Little things would flare up a passion or joy or laughter in her. He didn’t have to do much, and she worried that this felt a lot like falling for him. It had only been four days! Sarah took more than three months to say those three little words to Nicholas.

“Maybe tomorrow when it’s a more respectable hour you could come past my house after work?” She didn’t dare look at him. She felt, inside, that it was too early for that. But he’d say yes anyway to please her. “Actually,” she rushed out, after thinking, “don’t worry. I don’t know why I said that. So stupid.”

She shook her head, cursing herself, and slipped her fingers from Malik’s. Her bag was near the kitchen bench so she bent to retrieve it, and made sure everything was inside.

“You never let me answer.”

“I put you on the spot. In the
wrong
spot,” she replied, clarifying.

“Sarah, Sarah, Sarah …” His steps seemed to take forever to join her at the kitchen bench. He sat on a stool under the overhanging marble top and crossed his arms on the surface. “I’m a grown man. I’d also like to think that, with what we’ve got, I’m yours in some way, and can be a part of your life.”

“Really?”

She shifted to face him directly. Her elbows rested on the bench, and she sat her chin on the heels of her hands. There, she gazed into his warm eyes, and wondered how they could be so similar to everyone else’s yet be so infinitely more. They had more capacity to put her in a dream-like place. More depth. There was so much more of a story in those eyes.

“Don’t you think it’s better to do this right; truthful? I went through hell trying to figure out my life and who I was after what was revealed. I don’t want to be the cause this time of it happening to your mother. I can sense what you’re like inside—the  goodness in you. I don’t want this to come between you two. If you want, I’d rather be honest. Even if this isn’t ideal, there’s no point running because we’d just hurt ourselves and others, and then be alone.”

Malik reached out across the table to take her hands, and she straightened, resting on her forearms as she clutched him back. She allowed herself to nod, fearing she’d say the wrong thing, or he’d take back what he’d said.

“And,” he said, “I’d rather like to meet your mum. You’re important to me. I want you to meet Lucy one day, too. I want to know everything about you that you want to share.”

“Me too.” Sarah licked her lips, preparing to express herself. But she looked down first and saw the way he stroked her hands, never keeping still but squeezing and massaging his fingers with hers, how he handled her so delicately, and though it was only the beginning, all the little things he did to her felt more and more right.

“My mum,” Sarah said, “she’s so worried about me. The affair changed everything for us. Knowing Dad and Alyssa are an item again makes me nervous. I don’t want to hold back from her, and she could easily feel like I’ve sided against her, or pull away from me if she feels uncomfortable because of what she assumes. And, if you plan on sticking with me, you’ll see her lots in your future.”

“Our future,” Malik said. “You’re already mine, right?”

Sarah leant over, and he bent forward to peck her lips. “Right, you’re already mine, yeah?”

He gestured her over to his side with a flick of his eyes. She came around and he settled her between his legs. They were about the same height now. He rested his lips in the crook of her neck and she did the same.

“Truthfully …” His voice rumbled deep below her skin, while she thought up all the things he was about to say. “I worry.”

“Why?”

But Sarah already felt what he would say. Her skin felt heavy as if it would collapse on her insides, and her brain stiffened, so that she couldn’t feel or think anything more than the dread weighing her down. She didn’t know the words, but could feel the conflicting feelings of wanting him, and knowing she should stay away.

“What we have seems wrong. I’m some old single father, and your father is dating my ex.”

Sarah stroked his face, her other hand holding the back of his head close to her. She sighed against him. “We’re adults. And it’s not like I turned eighteen yesterday. I worry that
I
am not good enough. You have nothing to worry about when it comes to my feelings.”

“I know, but it feels like I’m taking advantage of you when I think about us. You’re so beautiful and smart, and I love how understanding and pure you are. You’re full of goodness. I hope you don’t think I’m using you or anything. Far out, man.” Malik shook his head. “I’m fucking this up.”

He leant back to hold her face and gaze into her eyes. Sarah could swear that look of his warmed her from her chest, spreading everywhere else. How could he think that? Maybe if she tried to put herself in his position it made some sense, but she could tell from his tone and hesitancy he didn’t believe, truly inside, what he said. She understood that he was sharing his fears about their “image”, not what he felt about them personally.

“I get it.” She smiled, and nodded, which made his shoulders relax marginally. “I do. But we need to just worry about us. If Dad and Alyssa never did what they did, and are doing now, we wouldn’t have to worry. Why ruin
our
happiness for people who didn’t care about
us
?”

He had one side of his lips crooked as he leant his forehead against Sarah’s. His height and the strength she felt from him were like a hot water bottle cradled against her.

“See? You’re incredibly wise and gorgeous. All of you.”

“Then you’ll have to listen. We’ll make it through this.”

“Deal.”  

She said goodbye and drove home.

Before she got out of her car, she pulled out her mobile and texted her father.

Would have been nice to hear about you and Alyssa Fawnheart again. Anyway, wish you luck with your future.

She knew he’d need it. Her dad was indecisive, and she figured Alyssa might not always be there. Raising a child without full support of a man had to be hard. Finding a guy, or the time to meet one who’d take her, child and all, could be harder still.

Sarah’s mobile beeped with a new message before she fell asleep, but half gone anyway, she fell deeper still until she was completely under.

DISCUSSIONS

NOW

That night after work, Sarah went straight to the bathroom after dinner. She’d spent her fifth day on the job loving every moment of being handed manuscripts and being in the inside world she’d always wanted to join, but it was about ten times more hectic than she’d anticipated. She’d proofread one hundred and fifty pages, organised a publication schedule for another book and had two meetings.

The sight of the shower made her sigh. She needed one, and she planned to scrub and lather up twice as hard as she normally would. Malik was coming over tonight, and she wanted it to be perfect between her mum, him and her. It was bad enough they’d probably hated the idea of each other for several years beforehand.

Sarah lined up her body wash liquids and decided on vanilla. She pictured Malik and knew strawberry-scented would have been a worse choice. He didn’t seem like he needed a cutesy, sweet girl.

After she showered, she tucked her towel around her and dug through her closet. She passed the jeans. If she got cold, she’d just turn the heater up. After pulling out two outfits and changing her mind, she settled on a patterned dress. It had spaghetti straps, a sweetheart neckline—perfect to accentuate a small bust like hers—and tightened under her bust, the material free flowing to mid-thigh.