Emotionally Compromised (Emotionally Compromised Series) (22 page)

"Yes. I'm fine. You're fine. We are fine," he confirms. He kisses me
, and his anxiety channels through my lips. A carnal need takes over, and my abdomen clenches as his tongue invades my mouth, twisting around mine. His body is seeking release, but not here, not now.

I pull away. "Jeremy, I need you." I mean it. I need him in
so many ways. He makes me human.

"And I need you; I'd be dead without you."

His statement rings painfully true. I still want to cry, and my brain is having a hard time fathoming the reasons why. I'm just trying to keep my body from shaking.

He rubs his thumb under my eye, wiping the lingering tear away. "No, no, don't cry, baby. Everything is
fine," he whispers as he places kisses on my reddening cheeks.

I absorb his touch for a moment, and then force myself to say, "Jeremy, we need to move."

He releases my face and nods. I grab his hand, and we leave the condo, no questions asked.

As we
rush down the hall, I realize the gun is digging into my back, but I don't care. I don't want to let go of his hand. I keep running my thumb rhythmically over his knuckles as we wait for the elevator, and my eyes are shooting every direction for anything. A second attack? Second assassin? Who knows?

The elevator doors open
, and we step inside. I lean over to press the G button. Once the doors shut and the danger seems paused, he leans down and nuzzles my hair, taking in my scent. "I'm all right, babe. I really am fine."

How does he know that I am still internally panicking? His words are soothing to my ears. "You're not
OK until I get you somewhere safe, Jeremy."

"I think
, at this point, as long as I am with you, I'm safe." He runs his nose against my ear. How can he be so damn calm?

I turn to face him, and kiss him on the lips. "You make me feel safe."

"Oh, I will try to keep you as safe as I possibly can, but just like in everything else, you have to one-up me."

For the first time in what feels like an eternity, I grin. I lean into his face, and realize how much I adore this man
. "Looks like I'll have to teach you how to use a gun now, huh?" As I press my lips into his, he hums in sarcastic understanding and enjoyment.

"Unfortunately, you might be right."

The door beeps open, and I am yanked back to reality. This time a smile plays on both our lips as we briskly walk into the underground garage. I'm on full alert, eyes darting to all the exits, scanning for people or a waiting car. It's clear and too quiet for my liking. Our pace is quick, and we make it to my car.

"Get in
," I snap.

I unlock the doors to my sleek black Shelby GT 500
, and notice Jeremy eyeing it with wide-eyed appreciation. For obvious reasons, he doesn't dare ask to drive, even though I know he is tempted and taking mental notes for later. It makes me smug; girls can like muscle cars too.

I toss my bag in the back as we slip inside. I pull the gun from my jeans, and place it in the center console before starting the engine. I can see him wearily eyeing the weapon.
Don't make me remind you that that thing just saved your life.

We drive in silence until we are out of the confines of the garage and on the road, the loud rumbling engine the only soundtrack to our scattered thoughts. As the sun
peeks through the tall buildings, I finally exhale.
How long had I been holding my breath?

My eyes keep darting to my rearview mirror
, checking for any following vehicles. Boston's hustle and bustle makes it difficult to identify a follower amid the cluster of vehicles. Jeremy places his hand on my knee and squeezes, causing goose bumps to rise all over my body.

"Where are we going?" he asks.

"Safe house. My house."

"Your house?" he asks, confused. "I've never been to your place."

I smirk. "Because as agents, we aren't supposed to reveal our personal residences. You never asked, so I never told. It stands as a backup safe house. It's equipped with security and some special equipment."

He nods as if it all makes sense, but I can tell from the look on his face that he is still overwhelmed, possibly
still confused. "How long will we be there?"

I zoom around a corner
. "At least twenty-four hours. It's protocol. Just in case there's danger, or someone within the system. We go offline for a full day to prevent being followed. We can call if we run into trouble, but other than that, it's silence. The agency will call with orders once we are in the clear."

"Oh."

I know it's a lot to take in, Jeremy.
I place my hand over his, and he entwines his fingers around mine as we continue to drive.

"What about that guy? Is someone going to go get him?" He's curious, and he has every right to be, but I don't know how to approach this.

"Yes." My tone is more clipped than I intend. "A team will go and collect him, and clean up the situation."

"He isn't dead?"

He thinks he saw me kill someone. The thought puts a lump in my throat.

"No. Just passed out. We need him for questioning."

There's a pause as he thinks for a moment, and then he asks, "Could you have killed him if you wanted to?" His tone is adorable, like a kid asking about an R-rated film.

I don't look at him. "Yes
."

"But you chose not to?"

"Yes."

"Hmm."

What are you thinking
,
Jeremy?
I'm a killing machine
;
I've told you this. We've been lovey-dovey for days, but this is who I am
.
If I wanted to put the bullet in his head instead of his shoulder I would have
.

"You are so calm. It shocks me. Actually, it scares me." I keep my eyes on the road.

"Alex, what are you scared of? I'm calm because I'm thankful. I'm thankful to be alive. I am thankful for you. I am only calm because I have you. The least I can do is be there for you right now. You've already done so much for me. This is all I have."

I smile. "Jeremy, you are so much more."

"But right now, this is all I have. From what I can tell, you need me as much as I need you. Just breathe for me, babe."

How can someone I barely know say all the right things? How does he know
I've ached to hear those words so many times?

We pull into a parking
lot and climb out of the car. I grab his hand and pull him toward a five-story building. Sitting on the bay, overlooking the shipping docks, are other looming buildings ranging in height, but most look abandoned. This building, more of a warehouse, has an old, classic vibe. It's a storage facility for a local furniture store—unmarked and inconspicuous.

We approach a large, metal door that seems misplaced
amid the red brick. I flip open a discreet looking brick panel to reveal a keypad. I type in my eight-digit code, and the door
pings
, giving us the clear. We walk into a narrow hallway with sterile, white walls that contrast the dark, dirty brick outside, and climb the five flights of stairs in silence. I let go of his hand when we reach another stainless steel door, and run my hands along the edge of the doorframe, looking for another hidden panel. I find it, revealing a shiny blue screen rather than a keypad. I press my index finger against it, and hold for fifteen seconds. The blue pad turns green, silently confirming my identity, and the door clicks open.

I pull Jeremy inside, locking the door behind me. A different buzzing sound confirms that the security system is in full effect. I let out a long sigh
, and for the first time, let everything in my body relax. I drop my bag on the floor and pull Jeremy against me. I grab his face, kissing him hard. He returns my kiss with equal fervor. I need him. I'm starving for his touch.

"Jeremy
, I was so scared. I am sorry you had to see that."

He pushes me away gently. "Huh? Are you embarrassed or something?"

The question seems odd, but is he right? "I don't know. I just ... I feel like a monster. I don't want you to see me like that."

"Doing your job? Protecting me? Those all things you are doing right."

"So you don't want to run away? Run for the hills?"

"Not going to lie. Initially
, I wanted to run away and hide because you scared me. You are one deadly woman. You wield so much power at a moment's notice. I've never seen anyone act so precisely, so quickly, with so much determination. Seeing you with the gun, and when it looked like it was aimed right at my face, that was scary. It's not something I am used to. But I got over my fear and realized you had just saved my life. I realized how special you are. I mean, you saved my life! Then I saw this look in your eye. This
lost girl
look. And I realized it was because of me."

I nuzzle my face into his chest. He smells like a crisp ocean breeze and something I can only define as Jeremy Hunt
. It's intoxicating and calming at the same time, and I take one more deep breath. "Only because I've never been so afraid to lose something. I've done so many bad things, Jeremy, with such ease, and it pains me to say that aloud, but you have to know that. I love my job, the power, and the skill. It gives me all the abilities to do what I need to do. And that is to keep you safe. The truth is, you keep me safe all the time. Safe from myself. I am a shell of person. I've never wanted someone to hold me before. Touching was something I avoided, but was starved for. You take me away from it all. I don't want to be an agent all the time. You are the first person I've met who grounds me. You make me feel like a mere mortal, rather than a violent hand of the federal government. It sounds silly, but you balance me. Being confronted with the immediate threat of losing you was something I had hoped to never encounter. But you have to know: this is what I was warning you about. Getting involved with me, this whole thing. Your life is threatened."

"Babe, if you hadn't been there, where would I be?" Tears pool in my eyes
. He leans in and kisses me. "I don't want to talk any more. I want to love you. Please let me love you."

There's that word. Love.
Is this what this is? Surely not. He wants to love me. Can I let him? Is this moment different from any other for him to find the need to use that word?

Well, there was an attempted murder on your boyfriend
. Calling it different might be an understatement.

I pull away from him and lead him
farther into my loft. My body is sore now from the rush. My joints ache, and my gut won't unknot.

House tour can come later.

Jeremy follows close behind me. I release his hand as we walk up the stairs to my bedroom. I pause, examining my bed with its white, plush down comforter, and white pillows. I feel like I haven't seen it in such a long time. An old friend—we can always pick up where we left off.

Suddenly
, Jeremy presses his body into mine, and his arms come around me, his front to my back. Encased in his tight embrace, I let my shoulders relax, and my arms fall to my side.

Jeremy
places sweet, silent kisses on my hair, and I lean back into his chest, cherishing his hold around me. He brushes my hair off my neck, giving him easier access to my skin. He places more kisses at my ear and under my jaw. I close my eyes, savoring his touch. His heavy arms drag roughly over my body; they linger at my breasts, and I push them into his firm, possessive grasp. The rough touch feels delectable. My body tingles and comes alive. The adrenaline still steady in my veins only amplifies with the brush of his skin against mine, be it his lips or his fingertips.

As he nips and kisses my neck
, his hands move to my hips, to the waistband of my jeans. He unbuttons the top button, and he slips his hand into my panties, cupping my sex. The sensation is overwhelming, and his ragged breathing teases my skin as he circles the sweet spot between my legs. He presses himself harder against me from behind. I can feel his growing erection, and it flames my blood as desire pools deep in my core. It feels bizarre that we can move from a near-death experience to this soft, sensual one.

"Jeremy
." It's a wispy attempt to get a hold of myself. He feels too good.

"
Shhh," he whispers in my ear, "I got you."

I want him now. I shift my body and turn to face him. His glare is practically feral as he devours me with his eyes.
He leans down and kisses me a few times, and I am mesmerized by his stare as he licks my bottom lip. My veins are on fire with a combination of adrenaline, lust, and something else I can't place. I need him.

I lean closer to him and allow my lips to ravage his
. Our tongues wrap around each other as his hands tangle in my hair, anchoring me to him.

I unbutton his jeans, pull down his zipper, and slide my hand inside his briefs, taking hold of his impressive length. I revel in the fact that Jeremy wants me. And I want him.
I stroke him appreciatively, squeezing gently.