Embers (The Wings of War Book 1) (42 page)

“So it’s not like we’re going to be married?” Ember asked again, her voice steadier.

“No, no, my dear, there will be no physical obligations whatsoever, unless you both agree to that later, which is no concern of mine.  I have explained what happens in the ceremony in some detail to Sawyer, and he has agreed to become your guardian.  He will be tied to you forever or until one of you dies.  You will feel his mind always and he will feel yours.  If you two are apart, you’ll know how to find each other.  Much of this I can explain after the ceremony, all the little nuances about guardianship, but you do need to be ready to experience all of Sawyer’s past experiences.  They will run through your mind quickly, but you’ll understand much of it, as terrible as his memories will be, they will become a part of you.”

Ember sat wide-eyed, as if she was a deer caught in headlights.  I started doubting that she’d do it.  Even if she was feeling guilty about her actions, she wouldn’t be pushed into such an act.  It was a big deal becoming tied to someone for the rest of your life, especially if you’d only known him for such a short time. 

But Ila was right, Ember needed a guardian. 

It was a moment before Ember spoke, and her words surprised me.

“I’ll do it.  I’ll accept Sawyer as my guardian, if you think I should.” She paused, and turned to me, narrowing her sky blue gaze before she added, “But don’t you go thinking that this makes us a couple, Sawyer, because it doesn’t.”

Matthew 13:49

So it will be at the end of the age.  The angels will come forth, separate the wicked from among the just, and cast them into the furnace of fire.

Ember ~ Forty-One

W
hat had I just agreed to?  Was I insane, or caught up in some fantastical dream that I’d soon wake from, maybe even back in my bed in Ohio? 

I’d just given the okay to having my mind permanently bound to a Demon.   

I shivered at the craziness of it.  But the priest had been told by the angel Eae that the apocalypse was approaching.  If it really was true then I needed to be ready.

Trust Fate, Ember. 

In the end, that’s what had decided it for me.  How could I ignore an angel’s instructions? 

It’s not like I was one of those girls who’d go to college and meet a normal guy.  No, marriage and kids weren’t in the cards for me anyway.  So getting tied-for-life to a soul-eater wasn’t such a bad thing, I tried to convince myself.

Still, could Sawyer really be trusted?    

Ila lit fragrant candles and placed them on the table and window sills.  The smells of cinnamon and ginger filled the room. I couldn’t stop myself from taking a deep breath.  The only light was the glow of the candles, giving the cabin an eerie feel. 

I sat on a pillow across from Sawyer, who began joking that the whole thing was shaping up to be a séance, until Ila gave him a withering glance that promptly shut him up.  

Ivan was snoring lightly in the bedroom, and I smiled at the speed in which he’d fallen asleep.  Who would ever have thought that I’d have a wolf kid for a sleepover? 

Could life get any stranger?  I immediately stopped that line of thinking.  Yes, it probably could.

Ila went into the storeroom to mix up a special drink for us.  Sawyer whispered that this was all just an elaborate scheme to poison him.  I had to laugh at that one.

He seemed nervous, glancing this way and that, lost in his own thoughts most of the time while we waited for Ila to rejoin us.  I took the opportunity to study his seraphic looking face while he stared at the flame that flickered between us.  Some of his dark hair tumbled down over his one eye, and his lips were pressed tightly together. 

When he raised his head, I didn’t look away. I couldn’t believe the rush of emotion pulsing through me.  Illuminated by the candle light, was the face of my dreams—a pensive and sorrow filled boy.  It dawned on me in that instant that although he was volunteering to be my guardian, he actually needed me as much as I needed him.  He was a lost soul, searching for a place of sanctuary in his black and terrifying world. 

Any lingering doubt vanished.  Sawyer was a necessary part of my story, an element that I couldn’t live without.  I smiled at the Demon, feeling as if a heavy weight had been lifted from my shoulders. 

His eyebrows raised and a grin spread his mouth wide.  The sadness left his eyes to be replaced with a soft look of desire.  The look made me blush. Then I was the one staring at the flame, too embarrassed to meet the gaze that I knew was still locked on me. 

A blink later, he was sitting beside me, his arm around my shoulder.  He touched my forehead, pushing my head back against him.  The muscles of his chest pressing into my back made me forget everything else for a moment.  I wondered how I’d lived life for so long without even knowing that he even existed.   

When his hair brushed the side of my face, I stiffened.  He bent his face to mine, and bushed his lips slowly along my jaw.  I trembled. 

Ila clearing her throat loudly had me up and away from Sawyer in a heartbeat.  When I got settled on the pillow that he’d previously occupied, I peeked up at him under heavy lashes.  He grinned wickedly, and I couldn’t help but smile back.   

Ila wasted no more time.  She handed each of us a mug with steam floating around its brim.  She then sat on the cushion next to me in a very spry movement for someone her age.  The way Sawyer’s eyebrow arched when he’d watched her position herself on the pillow said he was also surprised. 

“Drink the tea,” Ila ordered. 

Sawyer made a mock toast before downing the entire contents in two gulps.  I, on the other hand, sipped it more cautiously.  I was disappointed with its bitter taste.  Ila nudged me, and I drank faster, until the mug was finally empty.

I was slightly alarmed when Ila pulled out a small knife with an ornate handle.  As I gazed at the knife, fear was replaced with curiosity when I saw the designs of wolves on the blade.  It looked extremely old, and I wondered if Montery had given it to her.  Before I had the chance to question her, she took my hand.  I forgot what I was even going to ask when she poised the knife near my fingertip.                             

“Sawyer, do you have good self-control when it comes to blood?” Ila asked him in a straight-forward fashion.

“I’m better than most,” he said slowly.

The way he answered made me worry all the more, especially when Ila explained what she was about to do.

“The two of you need to ingest just a drop of the other’s blood to begin the ceremony.  There are many ways to do this, and I’d say the Demon here knows a few I haven’t thought of.  What I suggest for you love birds is for me to prick one of your fingers, and then you will each take the other’s hand, touching the blood to your tongue.  It takes hardly any blood at all, and that’s what worries me with you, Sawyer—will you be able to handle just a drop?”

“I should be fine, as long as Ember doesn’t get all sexy with me.”  He wasn’t kidding, he sounded perfectly serious.

“Don’t worry about me.  This is the grossest thing I’ve ever done.  I won’t make it last any longer than necessary,” I informed him with a grimace.

“This isn’t the time for banter.” Ila sighed.  “After you’ve both shared blood, we will all join hands.  Do not let go of each other’s hands or mine.  We must maintain the circle at all times. Do you understand, Ember?”

I wondered why she had singled me out. I could be stronger than Sawyer. “Yes, I understand,” I answered tartly.

“Let us begin then.”  Ila took Sawyer’s ring finger and made a small cut.  Then it was my turn. I squeezed my eyes shut.  I didn’t even like getting shots.  Ila did it so quickly; it only stung for an instant. I put the finger near my face to see a drop of blood pooling at the tip of it.  Ila motioned for us to do the blood exchange part. I felt corny.  It was as if we were doing an after school blood pact sort of thing, but I held out my finger to Sawyer anyway, and he did the same. 

Sawyer stared intensely at my finger, and it tied my stomach in a knot. He was the first to bring my finger to his lips, and Ila poked me to do the same.  When his lips touched my finger, he took half of it into his mouth.  I tried to pull it back, but he held it firmly and sucked gently—and probably longer than he should have. When he released my hand, his tongue slide over his lower lip, and he closed his eyes.  His expression was unfathomable.

Again, Ila poked me. I held up his finger, wrinkled my nose, and quickly touched

it with my tongue.  I looked over at Ila and she shook her head.

I blew out in disgust and tried again.  This time I actually got some blood in my mouth, and was surprised that not only did his blood smell the same as regular blood, it tasted normal too. I’d sucked on enough cut fingers during my childhood years to know what blood tasted like, even though the injuries themselves had mysteriously disappeared.  And his blood tasted the same as mine. 

I met Sawyer’s gaze, and his eyes were open and bright, boring into me. 

Ila took my hand and Sawyer’s, while he reached across to me.  I slipped my hand into his larger, calloused one.  We were all connected now.

“Ember, this part is just for you.  Reach out with your mind and enter his as if you are going to use his sight.” I must have scowled.  She added sternly, “Now don’t argue with me, Ember.  It will work, trust me.” She turned to Sawyer, “When Ember touches your mind, let her in.  Drop your barriers, and allow her entrance.”

He nodded, never taking his eyes off me. I shivered expectantly.   

“When you begin, I will be saying words you do not know or understand.  Just relax and get your minds together.  Once you are there, Ember, everything will change, and it will commence.  There is no stopping it.  The ceremony will run its course, not ending until it is finished.”

Ila breathed deeply, and glanced between us. “Are you both ready?”

I closed my eyes and left my body.  I’d touched Sawyer’s mind before, but this was different.  To actually enter another sentient being’s head would be difficult.  I pushed and found the wall, but it allowed me through, even easier than the crow. I opened my eyes to see Sawyer wearing a pleased smile. 

The rain was still falling outside, and the
tap, tap, tap
, on the tin roof were making me drowsy. Ila began chanting some words that didn’t sound like any language I’d ever heard.  But I tried to listen closely, fascinated by the sounds she was making.

They were natural sounds, a stick breaking or the wind rustling the leaves.  I started to think I might know this strange language, somewhere in the far reaches of my mind, I knew it, but I didn’t have any more time to try to figure it out.

Suddenly I was looking into the face of an attractive, dark haired lady. I felt total adoration for this woman.  She held me against her soft face, and I knew by the resemblance that it was Sawyer’s mother. 

The visions sped through childhood and the teenage years. There were carts, buggies and horses everywhere.  Friends, family gatherings, school days, a crush on a well-endowed red headed girl, pitching hay onto a wagon, casting a fishing line, and walking alone down a dusty road.

Faster the scenes went; soldiers, battles, cannons, killing, pain, courage, death, stink, and terror.  The visions sped into a blur.  Loneliness, frustration, weakness, pain, sorrow,
hunger, hunger, hunger, hunger
, surprise, beauty, desire, need, want, fear, fire,…
love.

Then it was over.

How long it actually lasted I don’t know, but my legs were cramped and tingling from lack of proper circulation. I kept my eyes squeezed shut, not wanting to face Sawyer.  Actually, I might just keep my eyes closed forever.

“You can let go now, Ember. There, there you did fine,” Ila said rubbing my back.  I dropped my head between my crossed legs. Tears broke free as the remnants of his feelings slowly dispersed into me.  The magnitude of his emotions frightened me.  How could anyone walk around feeling so intense about everything? 

His childhood was normal, at least for a boy in the middle eighteen hundreds.  The civil war was horrific, the demonic changing was impossible to think about even now, and the soul feeding was appalling. 

The most surprising part of all was when I came into the picture.  I never dreamed he had such ardent feelings for me.
  He really loves me. 
How could I ever look at him again, knowing his feelings were so pure and true, and mine were so screwed up? 

              I stayed with my eyes closed, and my head resting on my knees, for a long time while Ila rubbed my back and whispered soothing words.  What finally got me moving, was the realization that if I was so uncomfortably stiff, Ila must be in agony.

I sat up slowly, taking a peek at Sawyer. 

He was staring at me with a tight frown.  He knows about Marshall.