Elysium (21 page)

I smiled. “I really can’t dance.” I had to practically shout to be heard over the music, but of course Nik didn’t seem to have any trouble hearing me. He leaned in so close that I could smell the lime sorbet on his breath.

“You can stand on my feet, and I’ll do all the work.” He winked down at me, and I felt myself crumbling. He was a charming and convincing guy, what could I say. I placed my hand in his, and he pulled me up, weaving a path through the crowd and stopping, as he turned towards me. The song meshed together with a new one, this one slower, but certainly not something I could dance to. He started moving, keeping hold of my hands, as he moved my body with his. Soon I was getting into the music, laughing as one song blended into the next and we still kept dancing.

“Can I cut in?”

As the song wound down, Shawndra seemed to wiggle her way between us just as a slow song started. Nik looked over at me, and I smiled and waved, giving him the universal sign I was thirsty. I knew he would have pushed her away, if I gave the word, but I was a little tired and knew Shawndra would put up a fight.

“Can I have this dance?”

I was almost to my table when a deep voice had me stopping in my tracks. I turned around, my heart skipping a beat—Cadeon looked down at me. He wore a black tux, which I might add looked incredibly good on him. I stared into his Caribbean-colored eyes, getting lost in those blue-green depths, as he held his hand out to me, beckoning me to take it.

I let my hand slip into his, his palm warm and smooth against mine and sending tingles to travel through me. He pulled me close, so his palm rested against my lower back and our chests touched. I swallowed, holding his gaze. The song was slow and romantic, and I looked around at all the students pressed together, the girls resting their heads on the guys’ chests, the guys’ hands slipping dangerously low on their partners’ backs.

I wanted to rest my head against Cadeon’s chest. The urge to just let myself feel his body against mine, and listen to his heart beating, was almost too strong to deny. I didn’t do it though, not because I was embarrassed, but because I was afraid of opening up my emotions, to experience them full on. The song ended, but a beautiful classical piece started to play, a string of simplistic notes, coupled with the smooth sound of the violin, created a piece which would have moved even a rock. Most of the people on the dance floor sat down, none of them able to truly appreciate the beauty of those uncomplicated and lustrous chords.

I let Cadeon lead, let him move our bodies, as I finally gave into my urges and rested my head against his chest. I closed my eyes and let the sound of the rhythmic beating of his heart soothe me. I didn’t miss how his hand tightened on my back, or the soft words he spoke against my hair.

“You played so beautifully, it took my breath away.

I looked up and into his eyes, realizing we were no longer in the center of the dance floor, but pressed more against the corner, those liquid streams of silk hanging all around us and shrouding us from prying eyes. “Thank you.” It was just a whisper, but I knew he heard me. He stared down at me for the longest time, and then he trailed his finger down my cheek and over my lips. I wanted him to kiss me. I wanted to have another memory to accompany the greenhouse memory. I wanted to be able to remember him.

“You are so very beautiful. I find it hard to think when you’re around.”

My breath caught at his words, and I pressed closer to him, urging him to fill in that small gap between us and press his lips against mine. “Why do you have to think at all?” I felt drunk around him, lightheaded and dizzy. I wasn’t even surprised with myself for what I had just said. I didn’t even care. I knew what I wanted—Cadeon’s mouth against mine.

Drifting away until there was just the two of us in our own ethereal world, he took a step towards me, and I pressed myself against the satiny wall, placing my hands flat against the smooth texture, as he looked down at me. I could hear my heart beating wildly, could feel my heart slam against my ribs over and over again.

“I shouldn’t.”

“You should.” I had no idea where this courage was coming from, but if it resulted in Cadeon kissing me, then I didn’t want it to end. I heard him swallow, as his head slowly dipped towards mine. My breath was coming shallower the closer he came. His hand cupped my cheek, and I leaned into it, bringing my hands up and resting them on his chest. When he was just a hair’s breadth away, I closed my eyes, lifting my mouth towards his. His lips pressed against mine, and I held my breath, the sparks flowing between us exploding to encompass me. This kiss was so much different than the greenhouse kiss. As his mouth moved against mine, it was as if an animal had been released from him.

The kiss ended too quickly, and I was breathing heavily, as he stepped away from me, the chill from the air blowing between us, and I shivered. We stared at each other, and I touched my lips with my fingertips, still able to feel the electricity going through them.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.” He looked down at the ground, not meeting my eyes for several long seconds, just enough time for me to catch my bearings.

“I’m not sorry.” He looked up at me then, his face stoic. The moment was now awkward, and I was so upset over the fact. I didn’t feel like what I felt for him was wrong, but somehow I had a feeling Cadeon did.

“This isn’t wrong.” I needed to tell him, to let him know what was happening between us was right, on every level. His eyes traveled along my face, and I thought he would say something, but I was terribly disappointed, when he just let his hand fall away and shook his head.

“Are you going to the party after the dance?”

I just stared at him, confused as to how he could have just switched gears like that, when my mind and body were remembering his kiss. My mouth opened and closed but nothing came out. I turned and looked out at the dance floor, the silky sheer shrouding us and making the bodies on the other side seem like mist in the air. I drew my attention back to Cadeon, my brain functioning on a more normal level, as I watched him watch me.

“I don’t understand you, Cadeon.” I hadn’t meant to say anything, but I was so confused by my feelings, as well as how he acted, I was ready for answers. I wanted him to admit he had feelings for me, as well. Kissing me was one thing, and I knew he must feel something towards me or he wouldn’t have done it, but I
needed
to hear him say it. “You kiss me, but then you grow cold and distant. I just don’t understand.” He didn’t say anything. He watched me with that ever-present stoic expression. He exhaled and took a step towards me.

“It doesn’t matter if I care for you in a romantic way. Believe me, I would like nothing more than to hold you, to just smell your hair, as you rest your head against my chest, but it isn’t that simple.”

“Why isn’t it? It can be.” I took a step towards him. I noticed how his gaze flickered to my exposed neck, and I shivered, never once even thinking about what he was—what
I
was.

“There are just too many obstacles in the way, Meadow.” He lifted his hand and cupped my cheek, as he brushed his thumb back and forth over my skin. “You are so young and new to all of this. I would be taking advantage of you, if I let my needs outweigh what was right.”

I felt my anger and embarrassment increase. “You’re only twenty-one, Cadeon, only a few years older than me.”

He gave a humorless laugh. “You forget to factor in the hundred and some odd years which are tacked on to that.”

I stepped back, and his hand fell to his side. “Then why kiss me at all?” He shook his head and a look of defeat crossed his features. It infuriated me.

“I shouldn’t have done it. I can admit when it comes to you, I feel my strength and resolve crumble.”

Some of my anger dissipated with his endearing words, but I was still angry and frustrated. “Okay, that’s fine, Cadeon, but for both of our sake’s, maybe you can refrain from kissing me, because these mixed signals frustrate me.” I whipped the silk aside and stormed back to my table. He didn’t come after me, but I knew he wouldn’t. It sucked, big time, and maybe I was acting selfish and childish, but my heart hurt.

When I reached my table, I pulled my chair out with a little more force than was necessary. Nik and Violet were on the dance floor, and despite my anger at my own love life, I couldn’t help the smile I got, when I watched Violet dance with Xander. She looked so happy, and I was glad for her, because if anyone deserved a happily ever after, it was her.

The night waned on, and I didn’t move from my seat. There had been several guys who asked me to dance, some I knew and some I didn’t, but I had politely declined, and I had to keep telling myself it had nothing to do with Cadeon. I sneaked a glance behind me and saw Cadeon standing in the corner, stoic as he scanned the students. He never once looked at me, and my heart broke a little more. Maybe it was for the best. Although I told myself that over and over again, I couldn’t help my feelings or the fact I wished things could be different. I had begun to enjoy my new life even though I hadn’t “unlocked” my hidden talents. I slouched in my seat more, crossing my arms and feeling sorry for myself.

“Hey there, Miss Sunshine, why the long face?”

Violet’s bubbly voice tinkled through the air as she smiled and sat down, Xander trailing behind. I studied Arcane Manor’s star Lacrosse player, taking in how he was probably one of the bigger boys at the school. I studied him, as he sat across from me, taking note he never took his eyes off Violet, and how he wore an awestruck expression on his face. I wondered what he
was
, and tried to use my other senses that came with being a vampire to try to decipher what he was. At first, I didn’t feel anything, but then I felt a buzzing feeling at the base of my skull. It wasn’t extreme, but it was noticeable enough to make me wonder whether my powers were coming forth, but the feeling ended almost as soon as I felt it. I made a mental note to ask Violet about Xander at the party tonight.

The rest of the evening dragged, and I danced a few more dances with Nik. I felt like a lousy date, but I wasn’t in the best of moods since the whole Cadeon thing.

“You don’t look like you’re having the best time,” Nik said.

I looked over at Nik, who was busy refolding his napkin for the hundredth time.  “I’m sorry, I’m a crappy date. I’m ready for the party, that’s all.”

He nodded, his handsome face lighting up. “Me too, it’ll be a blast.”

I really hoped so, because I knew I didn’t want to dwell over what Cadeon and I could have had for the rest of my time at Arcane Manor.

Violet and I parted as we went to change out of our gowns and into more appropriate “party” wear. I ended up putting on a pair of jeans and a sweater and slipping on a pair of sneakers. I undid my chignon and put my hair in a ponytail, grabbing my red pea coat and a pair of thick wool gloves. Although it was cold outside, it was warmer than usual, but the weather can change quickly in Colorado, so I made sure to prepare.

I met Violet and Nik at the bottom of the stairs, worried the whole time a teacher would catch us. My fear must have shown, because Violet started teasing me as soon as I reached the bottom of the steps.

“They won’t catch us, at least not for several hours. This is one of the nights when the teachers and Headmaster are more laid back. They assume the Winter Solstice wore the students out. Little do they know, this after-party has been going on for years.”

We didn’t go out the front door, and then I felt like a fool for thinking we would. Instead I followed them down several long corridors I had never used. I knew if I tried to find my way back, I would get lost. We stopped at one of the kitchens. The Manor had three kitchens they used simultaneously, because of the student population, but because of the dance, the largest one was the only one used, and the other two were as barren as a desert.

The only lights were the track lighting illuminating the appliances. We went out one of the side doors and walked into what appeared to be a small supply room. Brooms, several sinks, and other paraphernalia used to clean the kitchen lay against the walls. Violet walked up to the backdoor, looking at a silver keypad above the doorknob for a second, and started entering in numbers. I saw a red light flash when she was done with the sequence and heard her swear softly. She tried several more times and finally, on the fourth try, it turned green.

She pushed the door open, and a gust of chilly air blew in. I buttoned the rest of my coat and followed them out, our shoes crunching on the snow. “How did you know the code?”

Violet kept walking and answered my question. “We had a big parent’s day thing here a while ago. I was volunteered by the Headmaster to help prepare the pastries, since my parents weren’t able to be here.” There was a little bit of resentment in her words. “The kitchen crew would go in and out of the backdoor all the time, and I watched them enter the code.”

“You weren’t afraid of them changing it?”

“No. Nothing ever really changes around here, but I did check it in case I needed to find another way out. The number sequence slips my mind more times than not though.”

We trudged down a hill, and I turned around, seeing the massive Arcane Manor looming behind us. I half expected to see someone in the windows, but most of the lights were off on this side of the building. I turned back around just in time to sidestep a tree. I heard Nik and Violet talking softly in front of me, as the tree line approached. We wove our way through the
aspens and blue spruces, moving deeper and deeper into the bowels of the forest. Although the moonlight speared through the heavy foliage, I didn’t have night vision like Violet and Nik, and I stumbled. Most likely sensing how uncoordinated I was, Nik slowed and gripped my elbow, helping me through the trees.