Eluding Nirvana (The Dark Evoke Series Book 2) (37 page)

With my head on the
pillow, Walker slipped between the sheets with his tank top still on. Rough hands caressed the length of my body, my thighs falling open the lower his touch went, until finally, the tip of his finger swept across the tip of my clit. Electricity and vibrations shocked my nerves into surrendering to the delicious sensations he was prompting, while my hips bucked, forcing his finger to slide down my core and into the wetness of my very depths.

Hearing him gasp was one thing, but seeing
his expression as he eyes fluttered closed, blatantly savoring that moment, when his finger slipped inside of me had a groan ripped from my throat. Inner muscles clenched and throbbed as they wrapped around his fingers, drawing him deeper inside of me as he continued to work on my frenzied body.

The springs of the bed s
queaked again as he rolled over and shielded my body. Fingers circling, he left his mark on my inner walls as he readied me for his length. Ever so slowly, he eased himself inside of me, stretching me, filling me, owning me as he pushed in further until he was buried to the root. Each decadent inch in both length and girth had my head thrown back and keening as I licked my lips.

Burying his face in the crook of my neck, my head rolled back, my e
yes closed as I allowed the wave of sensation to wash over my body, and set my nerves on fire as I adjusted to his invasion––his blissful, satisfying invasion.

He stilled
when I was fully impaled. When he lifted his head, I saw his lower lip trembling and I
felt
his entire body trembling above me as he held himself. “Fuck, Kady,” he gasped, “Jesus Christ,” was the last words he breathed before he began to move rhythmically, gliding in and out of my body like we were made for each other, hitting that delicious pinnacle inside my core that repeatedly tore moan after pleasurable moan from my voice box.

When his tongue dipped back into my mouth, swallowing my cries, my body was already joining his in its trembling
fervor. Hips grinding upward, I was meeting him thrust for thrust when my gaze landed on the mirrored ceiling. I watched the sheets pooling and shifting as the space between my parted thighs was filled by his muscular physique, pulling his hips back and gradually rocking back into me.

Seeing him working his body against mine, feeling the tingles and pleasure as he worked with me, and hearing the evidence of such pleasure with moans and labored breaths, along with the sounds of
the deed itself, the fluidity as he pushed through my slickness and the protesting groaning of the wrought iron bed as we moved in unison, was sensation overload.

The prominence o
f his shoulder blades shifted as he bore his weight through his arms at either side of my head, dragging himself back before gently lunging again.

A
familiar, long sought-after tightening in my pelvis radiated through my lower back, and tingles shot down my hips and legs, making my toes curl as he drove into me at some glorious angle that had his shaft gliding down the smoothness of my core, sweeping over my highly sensitized clit, before burying himself to the root in my depths once more.

Walker cried out as my muscles constricted around him, his eyes screwed shut as heavy, jagged breaths were pasted against the others face.

“God, Walker, fuck, fuck…” I whimpered and I swear tears were threatening. Under the sheets, my back bowed, my hands glided down his back before settling on each of his ass cheeks, feeling the muscles tense beneath them as his gentle rocking turned into powerful, feverish drives.

“Jesus, Kady,” he called while sheer greed and desperation spawned and my hands pressed into his behind further, drawing him into me, filling my already filled body as much as he could.

With a yell and a rapid gasp, he stilled, his body shuddering above me as I convulsed beneath him, my walls squeezing around him as we worked our lust-fueled possessed selves down from release.

I felt his fingertips gliding across my hairline, but all I could do was concentrate on having my heart rate return to normal while he braced his heavy body atop of me.

When he rolled over, I was taken in his arms, a kiss planted on my head. I snuggled against his chest, hearing his heart drumming against my ear and breathing in his manly scent.

Everything els
e faded away as slumber took me prisoner.

It was
the invasion of a soft golden glow, eradicating the shadows behind closed lids, which caused my eyes to flutter open. My body felt like I had been hit by a ten-ton truck. Stretching my limbs and cracking my back, a not so foreign sound of metal and protesting springs stirred and sounded beneath my body.

Fuck…

As soon as I came face to face with my naked body reflected in the ceiling, and the snowy white sheet pooled and creased around me, I forced myself into a seated position like it was going to halt the guilty conscience which I could feel manifesting in my bones.

“She’s awake,” the thick,
seductive voice sounded from the bedroom doorway just beyond my feet. “I brought you coffee.”

I’
d already gathered the sheet around my body, holding it knotted in the center of my chest with my left hand. I was frantically searching for my clothing when he began prowling into the room, his black sweatpants resting low on his hips, his broad shoulders and defined lines framed by his white tank top.

Assembling my scattered
attire, I hastily shoved my legs into my panties and jeans and quickly set to work, making myself presentable. “I can’t stay, Walker. I have to go.”

“Go where?”

Pulling my hair free of the collar of my blouse and with a frown marring my brow I breathed, “Home.”

“
Home? Kady––”

“No, Walker…” I held my hand up in a bid to halt his words, but it was a fruitless indication. Instead, he
curved around my body, rested the mug of steaming liquid on the bedside and placed me under his undivided attention.

Two oceans met and melded into one as c
alloused hands freed my face of stray tendrils, before cradling both my cheeks. “He doesn’t deserve you, Kady. You heard yourself what he’s been doing.”

“Walker––” I
objected.

“I don’t have much, darlin’, but I have a little saved. I can clear it this weekend,
we can leave Sunday night. I have a friend in Chicago who owes me a favor. We can be there before early hours Tuesday morning, and we don’t have to look back. A new life, for
us
.”

When I failed to
interrupt his statement, the hopeful smile spanning his face caused an intense warmth in my heart.

“What do you say, darlin’?” he asked, his eyes hunting mine with such
urgency, that all I could do was hang my head with guilt.

I didn’t know what I wanted. I didn’t know anything. The last twelve hours I had discovered that over a year of my life has been centered on nothing but total lies. To make matters worse, they were lies told by two people I had trusted for years.

Walker muttering the word, “Please,” had me lifting my gaze. His face grew closer to my own, and soon after, the tip of his nose was grazing down the length of mine, his forehead pressed against me. My lips were sought by his, and instinctively, my treacherous body began to reciprocate.

I couldn’t do this…

Pooling every ounce of strength, I finally dragged myself away from his lips and his clutch. “I can’t Walker. I’m sorry,” were the last words I battled to free as I skirted his body and with hurried strides, left the apartment.

As I de
scended the second flight of stairs of the Pavilion like a bat out of Hell, I heard his strangled bid to stop me. When I refused to stop, I knew that his lingering words were ones I had to keep reminding myself of when I got home. “You know the truth, Kady. You’re stronger than him. He can only hurt you if you give him the ammunition. Stay strong. Stay angry.”

I was on autopilot as I drove home.
I couldn’t remember getting from point A to point B, through the amassing of erratic thoughts in my head, colliding against my skull like they were in some pinball machine.

I felt as though I had lost myself. Liam may have remolded me into something he desired, and that therefore
caused me to lose aspects of myself. But the one moral that always remained, the one belief I had always upheld was my ability to be faithful. I wasn’t a cheater. Only now, unfortunately I was. I had lost myself entirely.

After pulling into the driveway alongside my home, the home where each wall should be painted black with the sinister memories that lay inside each of them, I noticed that Liam’s car was also parked in the driveway, yet each room of the house was shrouded by darkness.

When I stepped over the threshold, I closed the door firmly behind me, unzipped my boots and left them at the bottom of the stairs by the sideboard, and through the darkness, I treaded up the stairway.

Into the master bedroom I went and flicked the light switch to my right
, eliminating the shadows which dwell in their corners. I gasped and my hand lurched to my chest when, through the golden glow, I encountered Liam sitting on the bench seat in the bay window on the opposite side of the room. His legs were spread, his arms folded across his chest while his jaw was firmly set.

“Where’ve you been?” his tone was even and baleful. It sent a shiver up my spine when I re
alized which direction this confrontation was headed.

“Out.”

“She was out,” he mocked. Rearing himself up slowly and menacingly from the seat he took a deep breath, and watched me like a hawk as I strode to my side of the bed and placed my purse down on the mattress. “Was it good, Kady?” he probed. His hands now nestled in his pockets, his stance radiating hostility.

“Was what good, Liam? Finding out my boyfriend has been having an affair for over a year with someone who was supposed to be my best friend? Or finding out he’s been
hand feeding me medication which I don’t need and causing me to question my own fucking sanity?” Although my voice was full of resolve, internally, I was shaking and cowering away like an abused child.

Liam hung his head for a fleeting moment on a derisive snigger. When he looked back at me, his eyes
displayed a look both indestructible and tormenting. He began to prowl around the foot of the bed toward me. “I meant being the Irishman’s whore? I can smell him all over you,” he snarled.

Deep breath, Kady…deep breath…

“Well, at least I’m not denying it like some people.”

He scoffed
before his voice altered into a hard and authoritative timbre. “How dare you talk to me that way; you are my girlfriend––”

Walker’s words revolved around my head like a guiding light.
You’re stronger than him. He can only hurt you if you give him the ammunition. Stay strong. Stay angry
.

“No, Liam. This,”––I drew an invisible line between our gradually nearing bodies––“hasn’t been a relationship for a long time. It’s time for me to wake up and admit what
it truly is. This is nothing but an abusive relationship: emotionally, mentally, and physically. I am not your lapdog. Not anymore, I refuse to be because I am worth
more.
Now, if you’ll excuse me…” My legs were barely capable of sustaining my weight for much longer. My entire body from head to toe was vibrating.

I
avoided his body and began to make my way to the en-suite, when I felt his hand in the back of my hair. His nails scraped across my scalp leaving a burning sensation in their wake, which quickly subsided when my face was ruthlessly rammed into the wall. Instant pain shot through my head, my vision was drowning as tears sprang. Yanking my head back after impact, he brutally shouted through clenched teeth, “How dare you disrespect me!”

M
y eardrums rang, the volume of his voice enhanced the pain radiating in my head as my vision shook. My face was driven back into the solid barrier before I was tossed to the end of the bed, landing in a dazed, crumbled heap on the floor. Blood seeped from the gash on my forehead and trailed down the side of my face like warm velvet.

As he pointed
a scornful finger at me, I watched the demon break free. “You’re nothing without me,” he derided.

I had to fight back. I had to fight back. Keep
hold of that anger, Kady, I told myself. He abused you…

“No!
” I eventually roared, “You’re nothing without me, do you know why, Liam? Because you’re an abuser, and an abuser feeds on their victims weaknesses. No more, Liam. No fucking more!”

The deranged grin on his face and that look in his eye broke through my resolve.
On the floor at the foot of the bed, I was a quivering wreck. “No? Really?” he sneered, and before I could make for my escape, he was already pulling his arm back. The blow of his brutal fist across my jaw, followed by another directly upon my mouth had my lip split. My instant reaction was to trail my tongue across my teeth, just to make sure he hadn’t knocked any out.

As my forehead and my lip wept warm crimson liquid, I forbid the salty tears to weep from my eyes.
He’d enjoy that too much.