Electrified (40 page)

Both of Lila’s parents turned to glare at Carson, apparently understanding for the first time that the PI they’d hired meant something to Lila.

His arms wrapped tightly around their daughter was probably a pretty good clue, he mused. Let them try to say something to him; they would be sorry real quick.

Lila didn’t give them a chance to speak with Carson, nor did she even respond to them. She turned and began to climb back in the car when her brothers ran out of the house. It was clear they had been watching the reunion from inside the house, and no doubt knew what their parents’ message was.

“Lila!” they all shouted. The three men circled Lila and pulled in her for a tight hug. None of them had a dry eye and they kept repeating, “Lila, we were so worried. Love you, Lila.”

Carson knew that this type of touching, even between siblings, was unusual in their religion, but so were the circumstances. He stepped back to let Lila have her moment, and could see how torn she was. She obviously wanted to stay and revel in her brothers’ warm kindness, but she needed to get away from her parents, and fast.

With quick promises to spend some time with her brothers over the next few days, Lila excused herself to go back to the hotel. He knew she needed to clean up and rest, but she probably also needed some time to herself to figure out what she was going to do now that her true identity was revealed. And he hoped she’d decide to make a go of it with him.

There was nothing left for her at that brownstone. He wanted to make the whole memory disappear for her. Carson would be Lila’s home now, if she would have him.

As they settled into the town car and prepared to pull away, a police cruiser pulled up. Carson watched the officers load Elon’s parents into the backseat, then drive off with blue and red lights flashing.

Lila turned her head into his shoulder, blocking her own view.

L
ILA DESPERATELY
needed some time to herself when she finally made it to the hotel, time to digest all that had occurred in the last two days. Her entire life—past, present, and future—had collided in a way she never would have believed. Like a multiple-car pileup, all the facets of her life were crashing into one another, shattering into tiny bits and shards, leaving everything she ever knew in a state of disarray.

Anything she had ever subscribed to, believed in, or told herself had been crushed in three short days, and there was no simple way to reconcile that, let alone push on without misgivings. Lila needed to put the pieces of her short life back together, and figure out what she wanted moving forward. Neither would happen overnight, so she decided to give herself a break and mourn for the irrefutable loss of her parents, and the Sienna persona she had carefully constructed to be her suit of armor.

No matter what happened, she wasn’t going to be the same Sienna she’d been for the last several years, nor would she be the Lila of her past. Neither identity existed anymore, now that all she was and had ever been was laid out on the table for everyone to see.

Carson had said he wanted her. Wanted what from her? She wasn’t even sure who or what she was anymore.

Was she a good girl? A dirty stripper? Or just a nonbeliever?

As they approached their hotel, Carson instructed their driver to use a back entrance in order to avoid the media camped out in the lobby. For this alone, Lila would be eternally grateful. Forget how she looked, she wasn’t in the mood to reveal to the press how devastated she was as Lila, Sienna, or whomever they believed her to be.

She wasn’t even sure at the moment, so how could they know who she was?

Lila never wanted any kind of press coverage or notoriety, which was why she ran in the dark hours of the night. Sienna wouldn’t have wanted this type of information leaked to the press. Sienna heavily guarded anything other than the glitzy side of stripping, the perfectionism she brought to the industry, and her image at the Tunnel.

Lila and Sienna were two totally different women, one crafted to secure the safety of the other. They were light years apart when it came to their life experiences and expectations. Except when it came to Carson. He claimed to be able to see through Sienna, catching quick glimpses of the girl underneath.

It was true, at the core of each persona was Lila, the real Lila. Who that was at the moment, was anyone’s best guess.

With Lila being safe and all of her secrets exposed to those who mattered, where did Sienna fit? Could she go back to her life as Sienna Flower with the people who loved her more than the family she had been born into?

And if she went back to Vegas as Sienna, what would happen to Lila, the woman deep inside her soul?

Lila clung to Carson as the car came to a stop, afraid of the decisions she would need to make soon after she left the vehicle. She needed to understand who she was now that her past was behind her; frankly, something she never considered to be a possibility. Was she Sienna or Lila? Sienna had built a good life for herself over the last few years with decent people in it, and now she had Carson, so he said.

Carson. He fell for Sienna. He said he loved her whether her name was Lila or Sienna, but how could he know that? He had only just learned who she really was, where she came from, and why she ran away from it all. Escaped to a life she once would have called morally degrading.

Would Carson still love her now that her true colors were revealed?

Could she be Lila in real life with Carson and Sienna onstage to her fans? Would he accept that?

The woman winding through the hotel hallway, walking to her room at the moment would never say stripping or working in a place like the Tunnel was degrading. No, the Tunnel and the people that came with the club took care of and protected her when they didn’t even know what they were guarding her against. Those same individuals were on their way to see her at this very moment, to simply be with her, love her, and make it all better.

She could never give up Sienna totally. Sienna had given her what she was about to receive. A new family.

Her Las Vegas family thought she was beautiful inside and out, thought she was sweet and funny. They loved spending time with her. They didn’t yell or hit, only supported her unconditionally.

She would never desert them or what they grew together. Carson would have to understand. She needed these people to survive.

Her parents obviously didn’t get the ugliness she ran from and wanted to tear her away from the beauty she made instead. Lila knew she’d never reunite with them as long as she lived. It used to hurt when she thought about them over the years, but now she realized she’d believed what she wanted to about them. They weren’t the caring individuals Lila thought them to be from when she was a young girl. Her parents had an agenda to move up in their narrow world, and Lila was a pawn in their plan.

Lila had too much making up for lost time to do to burden herself with trying to figure it all out.

Her new family—Asher, Mike, Penelope, Petal, and Sydney—were on a private plane to New York to be with her, whether she was Lila or Sienna. Even Petey, who she heard stayed behind to watch the club, was closer to her than her mom and dad. She knew her new family loved her, and wanted to do whatever necessary while she healed from the kidnapping and attack. She didn’t need Carson to tell her that, but he did.

Their affection and Carson’s reassurance was more than her own parents offered her. Ever.

Carson hadn’t left her side. She wanted to let herself believe what he said in the car. He loved her. It wasn’t a fairy tale, but it was more than she ever expected.

Was it true? Could she allow herself to have it? To take the sweetness in front of her?

A
FTER SHOWERING
and resting for a couple of hours, Lila woke to find her friends waiting in the hotel suite. They ordered a late dinner to be delivered up to the suite, and while they ate, she told them the entire story about what happened to her before coming to Vegas, revealing details she’d never told anyone. They cried right alongside Lila over how she was battered and bruised, yet brave enough to climb through that window, get on a bus, and find them.

It was because of this family that Lila began the healing process she never quite started years before.

She needed to stop thinking about the what-ifs and should’ves, and start believing in a good life, Asher told her over and over again while tucking her into his side on the couch, stealing her away from Carson.

They were a motley group, all with their own skeletons in the closet, but together they were surviving, and that was what Lila needed. As a whole, the group decided to call her Lila in private. It was such a pretty name, a survivor’s name. But when she finally made it back to Vegas—and she was going to get back there, they weren’t taking no for an answer—she’d always be Sienna at the Tunnel.

She could be Lila with those who really knew her, and Sienna for her fans. Carson, despite being her biggest fan, was also the one who knew her best. To him, she became “Li” all the time.

During those first days in New York after her rescue, Carson held her, promised her everything would work out, and waited patiently for her to make sense of her future and what felt right. He didn’t push for her to say she loved him, but he made sure she knew he loved her without any reservation.

She went to sleep each night wrapped in Carson’s warmth. They didn’t make love. She wasn’t ready after what she’d been subjected to in the warehouse, and she wanted to get her mind in the right place so she could be completely attentive to Carson. He told her he understood and allowed her to keep control, but she relished in holding and kissing him without any secrets between them.

Lila made peace with her brothers. All three of them came to see her at the hotel and visited. Carson remained in the background, just in case Lila changed her mind or became uncomfortable. They all blamed themselves for not seeing any warning signs or stepping in when Lila needed them most, or when her parents chose the Finders over her. Her oldest brother, Daniel, seemed especially burdened by guilt over their part.

But Lila wouldn’t allow them to take on any of the burden. They were good men, and never doubted her parents would want anything but the best for Lila. Unfortunately, they had been wrong.

After all the emotions and reunions had run their course, Lila had to help the Bureau tie up loose ends surrounding the case.

Carson sat by her side the whole time she was debriefed by the FBI. He didn’t patronize or coddle her, but let her reveal the nasty truth about her life seven years ago, the details of her escape back then, and everything else all the way up to her abduction. She knew none of it was easy for Carson to hear, but she needed to control the information and make sure this time everyone knew the truth.

Carson had been right; Elon faced serious charges and lengthy prison time. It wasn’t hard to press him to divorce her. Filing the paperwork to dissolve her miserable marriage was the last thing Lila did before leaving New York.

W
ITH HER
real identification in hand, thanks to the Bureau, Lila left for Philadelphia to see where Carson lived. It was the first trip she had taken as Lila.

Carson had made plans for her to go back to Philadelphia with him while she spent time with her thoughts in the suite in New York City. He wanted to show her his condo before taking her on vacation, to the Bahamas.

Lila was apprehensive. She felt obligated to get back to the club and dance, to help ensure her friends were successful, and she’d never taken a vacation other than an overnight here and there in Red Rock with Asher. Not once had she gone a multicity adventure, let alone out of the country.

One call from Asher, and she was left with no more fears or excuses. He insisted she go, promised he’d take a long trip when she returned, and made her believe she deserved it. It amused her to think how he and Carson had obviously become fast friends.

Carson rented a car, a fast one, to drive them back to Philadelphia. Lila enjoyed the drive, taking in the passing scenery. She’d never been outside New York before she ran away, and when she did leave last time, it was on a bus and dark outside. Her most recent car trip back east was also less than pleasant, plus she’d been heavily drugged during the entire journey.