Authors: Jennifer Jakes
She melted against his hard body.
Oh, God, she wanted him, wanted to stay right here in his heat for just a minute or a month. She wanted to feel safe, warm. Wanted, wanted so much.
She lifted her head.
His lips were full and so close. His breath brushed across her cheek, warm, sweet from his sugared coffee. His palm slid up her ribs, his fingers achingly close to her breast, closer, closer, so close the breath froze in her lungs. The look he gave her was unguarded, exposed, raw, a look that stirred a spark inside her, sparked embers she'd buried long ago. A spark she thought to keep extinguished forever, but now it scorched her inside out.
And
God help her, she liked it.
Dangerous, dangerous, dangerous.
She couldn’t do this.
“
I—I'm sorry.” She jumped back, out of his arms, breaking the spell. She couldn’t let herself be burned up again. Alexander had nearly destroyed her, and she couldn’t take that risk again. She just couldn’t. “I um, I just wanted to ask you to wait and let me make sure she's decent.”
The m
ajor exhaled slowly, as if gathering control. His gaze raked her, hot and inviting, before he shuttered his eyes and cleared his throat. “Go ahead in and let the young lady know I need to talk to her. I'll wait here.”
Eden nodded, then slipped inside the
dark room, releasing a long sigh of relief, or was it disappointment? Both maybe, but it didn’t matter. This had to stop. She had too much responsibility to let herself become involved with a man.
“Mary Rose?” She lit the lantern. “Do you feel like talking?” Sitting the lamp beside the bed, she touched Mary's cool, pale face.
And screamed.
Panic exploded inside her. Panic and pain. Mary Rose lay across the bed, an empty
bottle of Laudanum in her hand.
He
burst through the door, pistol in hand. “What is it?” His eyes were wide, his gaze darting around the room.
“
We have to get her to the doctor. Now!”
“
Shit.” He holstered his gun and rushed to the bed.
Fear fisted Eden's stomach.
Why, why, why?
Damnit, Mary had seemed better this morning. She'd even smiled a little when Eden had brushed her hair. How long had she been lying here? Minutes? Hours? She was so chilled, so pale.
“
Where’s your doctor?”
“
A few streets over.”
The m
ajor lifted Mary Rose, blankets and all. “Show me which way.” He shouldered through the door. Eden followed down the hall, then hurried around him to open the door.
Alice ran into the kitchen.
“What's happened? I heard more screamin'. Oh, Saints, no.”
“
We're going to Doc's.” Eden yelled the last word as she bolted out the back door. “Come on, Major. Hurry!”
She ran
into the alley, cursing her slowed pace as her bad leg seized with each step. The major's footsteps thundered behind her. They ran across the street and down three blocks to Doc Brown's office. A single lantern glowed through the window. He had to be here. Had to.
“
Doc?” Eden pounded on the door. She glanced back at Mary Rose, limp in Sinclair's arms. “Doctor Brown!” Horrifying memories threatened to drown her. Running, crying, knocking on doors, begging for help.
“Help me, please.”
Tears streamed down
her face.
Her legs trembled and her hands shook.
Gripping pain squeezed her chest until she couldn't breathe.
Where
was the doctor? She had to get help. Had to save Mary Rose. She couldn't die. It couldn't happen again. Not again. Please God.
“
Doctor,” Eden screamed. “Doctor, where are you?”
“
For pity's sake, Eden.” Doctor Brown rounded the corner of the boardwalk, his wife on his arm. “What's happened?” He hurried to unlock his door.
“
It's Mary Rose. She's drank a whole bottle of Laudanum.”
“
Oh, Christ.” The doctor ushered them inside and to the back where he examined his patients. “Place her onto the table.” He grabbed his stethoscope, pulled open the blankets. “Soldier, take Eden out to the waiting area.”
She couldn't leave her.
“No, I—”
Sinclair took her arm.
“Come with me. Let the doc do his job.”
“
No.” Eden tugged against Sinclair's hold. “No, you don't understand. I have to help her. She can't die. She can't.”
“
Eden!” He gave her a shake. “Come in the other room and wait with me. Now.”
A sob tore through her and her knees buckled
. Sinclair's arm steadied her as he led her into the adjoining room.
“
It—it's my fault. I—I shouldn't have left the Laudanum where she could reach it. I should have known. I should have walked with her that night, stopped the man. Protected her.”
“
Shhh.” Sinclair tried to gather her in his arms, but she broke free.
She didn't want comfort. Didn't deserve it. No matter how hard she tried, destiny would punish her for being what
she was. A coward. A whore. A—
“
Eden.” Doctor Brown's voice broke through her thoughts. He stood with his head bowed. “Eden, there’s nothing I can do. She's been gone too long already.”
“
Noooooooo.” The room started spinning and the years melted away. Horrible memories filled her mind, the same shattering words echoing in her ears.
There's nothing we can do. Your mama is gone. You have to dry those tears and be strong.
The old nightmares rolled through her until her head roared with the past.
Ripping open the door she ran.
She didn't want to be strong. She was nine years old and her mother was dead!
“
Eden!” Sinclair's shout echoed down the street.
No, no, no. She kept running. Tears blinded her. Her chest ach
ed as if her heart might explode. Her bad leg started cramping. Could she just keep running? Never stop? Run far enough to forget the past?
“
Eden, damn it, stop.” Sinclair scooped her up mid-step and held her back tightly against his chest. His breath came in pants against her shoulder, his heart thundering against her spine. “Stop. You can't out-run what's happened.”
“
No. Please let me go.” She kicked and squirmed to be free.
“
It's not safe for you to be out here alone.”
“I don't care.” She'd do what she must to survive. Just as she'd always done.
G
irls who are alone have to spread their legs for rich old men if they want to have food and a place to live. Now that your mother is gone, you'll have to provide for yourself and your sister.
“
Eden?” His voice pushed the nightmare from her mind. “Let's go back to the saloon. We need to tell Alice what's happened. I'm sure she's worried. The rest of the ladies too. They deserve to hear the news from you. I'll stay while you tell them.” The soothing sounds of his words wrapped around her like a warm blanket. “All right?”
His breath brushed her neck, his hands stro
king her waist. Strong. Warm. God, she just wanted to be warm and safe. Protected. Just once. Just for a little while.
“
We’ll go back and have a drink. It’ll help you calm down.”
“
I don't drink.” Her self-control slipped away like the mist if she drank. And she had to hang onto her control.
Slowly he set
her on her feet, and turned her to face him. He tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear, his fingers trailing down her cheek, his gaze searching hers, silently asked questions she couldn’t answer. If she started talking she might never stop. Too many memories, too much pain burned in her tonight. One word would lead to one explanation, which would lead to her pouring out her entire life for the major to examine and judge. She couldn't bear to see disgust on his face. Not tonight.
She squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head.
“All right. No whiskey. How about coffee then?”
Eden nodded,
no fight left in her.
The safest thing to do would be to send him away. But coffee could be safe
too. And tomorrow would be soon enough to be strong. Tonight hurt too much.
S
inclair took off his coat and draped it over her bare shoulders. “Here, you're shaking.”
She was. Shaking
, and her teeth were rattling near out of her head. She just wanted to stop feeling for awhile. Stop feeling pain. There was too much twisting her heart – to the point she couldn’t breathe.
He pulled her close to his side, sharing his heat.
“It’ll be all right. I’m here.” The words fanned the hair at her temple, his lips warm as he spoke. “I’m here.”
Numb, she let him lead her back to Devil's Gate
, his large hand holding hers. God forgive her for being weak, but she needed his strength right now.
In silence
they walked back to the saloon, around to the back door. Alice waited in the kitchen, her eyes red-rimmed and puffy. Eden shook her head, unable to say the words.
“
Oh, saints preserve us!” Alice ran from the room and up the stairs, her sobs drifting down as she told the other girls what had happened. Wails filled the brothel upstairs, the sound—the pain— so much like the night Mama died, tremors rolled through Eden. Maybe a drink wasn't such a bad idea. Just one shot to help her sleep, to chase away the nightmares.
“
I do need a whiskey.” She tugged free of the major’s hand and marched through the swinging door into the bar room. A few men still lingered, drinking, waiting…
Silence fe
ll over the room as they all stared at her.
She couldn't pretend to be nice to these men when one of them could be the rapist.
“What are you all lookin' at? Get out. We're closed for the night.”
Chairs screeched
across the floor and men scattered. All but one.
“
Well, I ain't done eatin'.” Len nodded to his steak. “And I ain't leavin' till I'm done.”
“
Get out, Len. Take your damned plate with you, but get out.”
He sneered.
“Go to hell. Ain't no woman – no
whore
– gonna tell me what to do.”
Anger boiled through her. Len was a hateful bas
tard. Mean. Just like Alexander.
“
I said leave.”
“
No.” He narrowed his eyes. “And when I'm done eating, I'm going to come behind that bar and give you what you're just begging for, a good screwin'. I'm sick and tired of a damned whore actin’ so pious.” Throwing his napkin onto the muddy floor he stood and stomped toward her. “In fact, to hell with eatin'. I'm going to give it to you now.”
Her heart jumped into he
r throat. The look on his face, the same look Alexander had the night he’d nearly killed her.
She grabbed the shotgun from beneath the
bar and pointed it at Len. “Get away from me.”
Len sneered.
“You ain't gonna do nothing, nothing but squeal and holler just like the others. Takin' on you don't like it, but you will. You all always do.”
He stomped toward her, big, brutal. Threatening.
Blood rushed through her ears. Her vision swam.
He was the ma
n who raped and killed Mama.
The man who raped Mary Rose.
Alexander.
Blam
.
The blast rocked her back on her h
eels. Len's eyes widened, his hands immediately on his chest, his gut, feeling, searching for blood.
Screams filled the upstairs and f
ive female heads poked over the stair rail.
The kitchen door
slammed open. “What the hell—?” Sinclair stopped short, his pistol aimed at Len, his gaze fixed on the slug hole in the far wall.
Eden cocked the second hammer.
“Get out, Len. The next one will go through you.” Her hands shook, anger pulsing through her. Sweet, righteous anger. And power. God, the heady power of defending herself spiraled through her like sunshine, a split second of drunken freedom before the old fear returned and her hands started shaking.
Len pointed at the m
ajor. “You gonna let this bitch shoot at people? She's crazy. Ain't you got someplace to lock her up? She tried to kill me!”
Sinclair holstered his pistol.
“If she intended to kill you, you'd be dead about now.” He wrenched the gun from Eden's hands. “Now, get out.”
Len spit and started backing toward the door.
“When she hurts someone, it's on your head. You hear? And don't think I won't be waiting to report this to your superiors so you will get full blame.”