Echoes (10 page)

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Justin said in his best radio announcer voice. Turning to the rest of the team he said, “Thank you.” And then to the other team, “Thank you. I couldn’t fully concentrate until she had given me a straight answer. You know how it is with women. They like to keep you guessing.”

T
he week sped by, and Lauren felt young and free-spirited, looking forward to her date Friday with Justin. Garry had eventually disappeared at the picnic, and Lauren and Justin’s team had won the volleyball tournament. More than once Justin had praised her game skills. She loved volleyball. It was the only sport she had played much.

Justin had stopped by her teller window every day that week since the picnic. Tuesday he cashed a check for twenty dollars. Wednesday he asked for a roll of quarters, saying it was time he did some laundry. Thursday he stopped by her window to give her a candy bar, stating that the machine down in the lunchroom had flipped out and given him two Snickers for the price of one.

Now it was Friday afternoon, and Lauren’s stomach curled into a knot. She hadn’t seen Justin all day. Her window faced the main entrance and the elevator, and she had kept glancing over in that direction, expecting to catch a glimpse of him at
any time. She replayed the way he had flirted with her at the picnic and how he had been unashamed to let everyone in the volleyball pit know that he had asked her out. It seemed like high school all over again, and Lauren couldn’t help but wonder if she weren’t regressing by being so caught up with the excitement of going out with Justin. Dating Jeff had been so much more staid and “mature.”

At lunch that afternoon Mindy had asked her what she was going to wear, and Lauren had confessed she had five different outfits laid out on her bed waiting for her to get home and decide.

“This is a big deal to you, isn’t it?” Mindy had said.

“I suppose.” The lunchroom was crowded, and Lauren didn’t want anyone to hear what she was saying, especially someone like Justin, who had just as much access to this lunchroom as anyone else who worked in the building. “It’s my first date since Jeff,” Lauren said softly.

“The way you’ve been moony-faced all week, I’d think it was your first date ever.” Mindy leaned closer. “Don’t get me wrong. I like Justin. I don’t much like the idea of this being such a huge event in your life. It gives him the potential of breaking your heart.”

“That’s already been done,” Lauren said.

“All the more reason for you to approach bachelor number two with caution. Do you get what I mean?”

“You’re suggesting I might be on the rebound?”

“Bingo!” Mindy said.

“It’s been more than two months. I’m over Jeff. He’s ancient history. Do you see me crying over him any more?”

“I didn’t see you ever cry over him.” Mindy made one of her puckered faces, which meant “you don’t get it yet.”

“Don’t look at me like that,” Lauren said. “I’m telling you,
I’m over Jeff. Have I even once mentioned him to you in the past three or four weeks?”

“That’s what makes me nervous. You were in love an awfully long time to be out of love so easily.”

“You know what, Mindy?” Now Lauren leaned closer. “I’m not even sure Jeff and I were actually in love.”

“You were.”

“I don’t know.”

“I know,” Mindy said firmly. “Love comes in all shapes, sizes, and styles. Yours may not have turned into an ever-after love, but it was love, all right.”

“I don’t think it was love at all.”

“See? This is why you worry me. You stuff those feelings in any deeper, and you’re going to need to buy a bigger size of jeans. You’re not over Jeff. Not completely. You bounced back way too fast.”

“Oh, yes, I am over him,” Lauren said, standing up, ready to go back to work. “And tonight I’ll prove it. Call me tomorrow if you want the full report.”

“You know I do. What time should I call?” Mindy rose and they headed for the bathroom.

“Anytime.”

Just as they turned the corner to enter the women’s restroom, Justin came hustling out of the men’s restroom. It was an awkward moment.

“Hey, I was about to come find you,” Justin said. “Is 6:30 still okay?”

“Sure, that’s fine,” Lauren said. Mindy lingered by her side.

“How’s it going, Mindy?” Before Mindy could answer, Justin snapped his fingers. “I know what I was meaning to ask you, Lauren. What’s your apartment number? I didn’t see it on the map you drew me.”

“F-52. It’s toward the back.”

“Great,” he said, breaking into his earnest grin. “See you at 6:30 then.”

Lauren lifted her hand to wave good-bye. He was already on his way up the stairs. She glanced at Mindy, who had a questioning look on her face.

“What?” Lauren asked.

“Do you have any idea what a fine looking man he is?”

“Yes, I do, and may that be a lesson to you.”

“A lesson to me?”

“Yes. Stop being so negative about my first date with him. Everything is going to be great.”

Lauren was still telling herself that at 6:25 as she tore around her apartment trying to find her other earring. She had bought a pair of dangling earrings with blue beads at a flea market in July, and now one seemed to be missing. She had decided on jeans and a simple white T-shirt. It was basic and could be easily dressed up, like with the dangling earrings. Now where was that other one?

While on her hands and knees looking under the sofa, Lauren remembered taking an earring off a few days ago as she talked on the phone. Scanning the kitchen counter, her eyes caught on a tiny blue bead inside the box of Kleenex tissue next to the phone. She grabbed the earring and slipped it on just as an energetic knock sounded at the front door.

“Hi, Justin. Come on in.”

“Hey, nice place you have here,” Justin said. He wore jeans, cowboy boots, and a Hard Rock Cafe T-shirt. His sun-bleached hair was slicked back, and he smelled like lemons and wood smoke mixed together. Fresh and woodsy at the same time.

“It’s kind of a mess,” Lauren said. “I couldn’t find this earring, and I nearly tore the place apart looking for it.”

“Looks like you found it,” he said, checking her ears and
then admiring her in a full scan. “You look real nice.”

“Thanks. Let me grab a jacket, and I’ll be ready to go.”

“It’s still hot as blazes out there. I don’t think you’ll need one.”

“You think so?” She couldn’t think straight. Her linen blazer was part of her ensemble. It made her look much more put together than the simple white T-shirt. “Maybe I’ll grab it just in case.”

“Fine with me,” Justin said as she disappeared into the bedroom. “What on-line service are you with?” he called after her.

Lauren returned with the blazer on, sleeves pushed up, and a thin strapped little leather purse slung over her shoulder. “What did you ask?”

“I asked about your computer. Are you on-line?”

“I am, but I have to admit I don’t know any of the technical terms. My brother is the computer geek, or brain, whichever you prefer. He brought me the computer and hooked me up so we could keep in contact with each other. It’s worked out nicely. We e-mail each other a couple of times a week. The computer has been great, too, for homework. Did I tell you I’m going to school?”

“No. Why don’t you tell me all about it on the way. I made reservations for 6:45.”

After checking to make sure her front door was locked, Lauren followed Justin down the stairs. A bright red sports car waited for them in the first uncovered spot.

“That’s yours?”

“Yes, ma’am. I do hope you don’t mind a little wind in your hair.”

“How fun,” Lauren said, hopping in. “This is adorable! How long have you had it?”

“ ‘Adorable,’ ” Justin repeated. “Mabel here has been called a
lot of names. You’re the first one to call her adorable. I’m sure she’ll be your friend for life because of it. I got her from my grandpappy in Kentucky. He bought her thirty years ago and hardly ever took her out. My granny said Mabel here was his mid-life crisis. As long as she was in the barn, Granny didn’t have to worry about his taking off with other women.”

Justin revved up the engine. “My grandpappy passed away three years ago, and he left me good ol’ Mabel. This little sweetheart has cost me more than two cars twice her size would have.” He patted the dashboard and said in a smooth voice, “Don’t take any of that personally, girl.”

Lauren could feel herself beginning to relax. By the time they arrived at Clementine’s, which was a bustling restaurant, she felt the thrill of being with Justin starting all over again, as it had at the volleyball game at the Labor Day picnic. Several people at the restaurant greeted Justin by name. He waved and smiled a big, friendly greeting to all of them as he and Lauren wove through the loud bar area into the restaurant.

She had never been to Clementine’s. It looked like a fun, earthy sort of place from the outside with its wooden flower boxes and green shutters. Inside it was equally charming. The tables were all different sizes and shapes, made from a wide variety of woods. Bunches of wild flowers hung from pegs on the wall. At the end of each table a live, potted plant was embedded in the wood. Some of the plants grew a full three to four feet above the table, creating a cozy camouflage from the rest of the tables. The room was light and airy like a mountain cabin. Lauren liked it.

“I always wanted to try this place,” Lauren said as they sat down and picked up the menus in front of them. “I even suggested it to Jeff a few times, but he never wanted to try anything new.” The minute the words were out, she stopped herself. What was she doing talking about Jeff?

“Was Jeff your last boyfriend?” Justin asked. If he felt threatened by her mentioning Jeff, he didn’t sound like it.

Lauren wished she hadn’t brought him up. “Actually, we were engaged.”

“Really?” Justin appeared interested. “How long ago did you break up?”

“June.”

“Is he still in town?”

“No. He went to New York. Listen, Justin,” she laid down her menu, “we don’t have to talk about Jeff. I’d much rather talk about you.”

Justin held up a hand to silence her. “Hey, doesn’t bother me a bit. The guy had his chance. He obviously blew it, and you’re fair game.”

“I don’t know if I’d call myself ‘fair game.’ ”

“Sorry. Old country-boy talk. What I’m trying to say is, I don’t mind your talking about whatever you want to talk about. Might help you to get some of your feelings out in the open.”

“I don’t know,” Lauren said, pulling back from the tender subject. She shifted her focus to the menu and asked, “So what do you recommend?”

“All their salads are great,” Justin said.

Lauren decided on the Sunshine Salad with romaine lettuce, mandarin oranges, grated carrots, and sunflower seeds. As the waiter placed a basket of warm, twelve-grain rolls before them with a dish of butter, Lauren attempted to launch into another topic of conversation with Justin. “It’s my turn to host the newcomers luncheon this Sunday. Do you want to come? I think only two other people have signed up.”

“Sure.” He leaned across the table and said, “If you don’t mind my asking, why did you and—what was his name, Jeff?”

“Yes.”

“Why did you and Jeff break up? If I’m getting too personal, you can slap me, and I’ll hush up.”

Lauren smiled and said, “No, that’s okay.” She didn’t really feel it was okay, but she didn’t know how to gracefully slip out of the question. “We broke up because Jeff was offered a position in New York, and, well, he pretty much made the decision to accept it with or without me. I guess he assumed I’d follow him.”

“And you’re not a follower,” Justin suggested.

“I have been. I followed Jeff here to Nashville.”

“Well, I’m glad you stayed,” Justin said, letting a Wiley Coyote grin take over his face. “I’m not much of a New York person, either.”

“I’ve only been there a few times,” Lauren said as their salads arrived. “But I don’t think I could have lived in New York. Not for very long, at least. I prefer small towns. Jeff said he would like to live in the country, but he didn’t really mean it, I don’t think.”

Justin nodded and silently encouraged her to continue.

And continue she did. During their entire meal Lauren talked about Jeff: How different he was from her; how blind she had been to the imbalances of their relationship; how she now realized Jeff had held her in a sort of emotional bondage.

By the time they finished their meal, Lauren felt yucky. All this pouring out of her heart and evaluating their relationship had made her feel foolish and blind to have ever gone with Jeff in the first place. Justin didn’t say anything that made her feel that way; she drew her own conclusions while listening to herself talk. A deep, sinking feeling clung to her as they left the restaurant.

Justin suggested they drive around town with the top down. Even with the wind in their hair and the cool of the evening to blow away the depressing thoughts, Lauren still felt
burdened, weighed down with the uncomfortableness of her own words and the direction the evening had taken.

“You know what, Justin?” she said as he pulled up in front of her apartment. “I really enjoyed having dinner with you, but I feel as if I put a gloomy shadow over the whole time with all my talk about Jeff. This isn’t how I wanted the evening to go.”