Dying to Date (19 page)

Chapter Nineteen

Seconds ticked past as her mind whirled with her options. Turning and walking the other way seemed a good choice, but that would be the coward’s way out. She could ignore him and simply enter her apartment but that also seemed rather childish. The adult thing to do would be to smile and make small talk, pretend his presence didn’t make her bleed. However, seeing him there, looking every inch as gorgeous as she remembered, she didn’t know if she could pull off “unaffected”.

“Tarian,” she greeted him, lifting her chin. “I was not expecting you. If you require an appointment to discuss council business you can make one with my secretary and meet me at my office between the hours of ten and three.”

A tiny smile twisted his lips. “This isn’t about the council, and you know it.”

“Then we have nothing to discuss.” She strode to her door and unlocked it, trying to ignore the prickling awareness on the back of her neck, which had never been there before. She didn’t want to fear him, but her instincts screamed to get away from the necromancer as soon as possible.

“Going to invite me in?” he asked, leaning against her doorjamb.

“You didn’t need an invite last time.”

“That was different.”

She glanced at the door, not wanting to look into those eyes she’d fallen in love with. “I don’t have anything to say to you.”

“I know,” he breathed. “But I have things to say to you. Please, Melissa. Let me in.”

She wavered. Despite the logic telling her anyone with his abilities should be avoided at all costs, her heart still clenched at the sight of him. Maybe this would help. She’d hear him out and then they’d have closure. They could meet as polite strangers next time.

“Fine,” she said, stalking into her apartment. “You have five minutes.”

She kicked off her heels as Tarian closed the door behind them. Ignoring him, she went to the kitchen and pulled out a bag of blood.

He waited in silence as she poured the red liquid into a novelty mug Chloe had given her that read “got blood?” on the side and popped it into the microwave.

“Your time is ticking,” she reminded him, watching her mug rotate on the glass plate.

“Look at me.”

The microwave beeped, and she pulled out her drink.

“I don’t need to,” she said as she turned, blowing on her mug. “I know what you look like.” She tried to stalk past him but he caught her arm.

Taking the cup from her fingers, he set it on her floating island before tipping her chin up.

The blue of his gaze filled her view. For a brief instant, all she wanted to do was wrap her arms around him and block out the rest of the world. When he held her, all their problems fell away. They could go back to being the partners they’d been on the road. The ones learning to trust, too naive to believe the other would ever break their word.

He drew his knuckles gently over her skin. “God, I’ve missed you,” he whispered.

She closed her eyes and tried her hardest not to melt beneath his touch. “This isn’t helping either of us,” she said. “You should leave.”

“I will if you answer one question.”

She looked back up at him. “What?”

“Do you love me?”

Her already battered heart shattered. They were not going to do this. She would not stand here and rehash everything that had gone wrong. She couldn’t bear it. To hell with closure, she wanted him gone before she revealed even more pitiable secrets.

“Leave,” she said, her voice flat.

“You know how to get rid of me,” he replied, one thumb brushing against her lower lip. “Tell me you don’t love me, and I’ll never bother you again.”

“Did you forget what led to this lovely moment we’re having?”

He shook his head. “I don’t deny there are complications with our union, but I believe the benefits far outweigh any potential risks.”

“Going to woo me with finance speak?” she taunted.

“I’m trying to tell you every day I spend away from you is hell.”

She looked down. It should be comforting to know she wasn’t suffering alone, but instead it just made her sad that he was living the same pain she was.

“We can’t change what we are,” she whispered. “It makes no difference if I love you or not.”

“It does,” he replied. “I’ve waited centuries to find the one woman I’d spend eternity with, and I knew the first moment I saw you, Melissa. You were the one for me.”

She dragged her gaze back to his. “You said I wasn’t your mate.”

“I lied.”

The vise on her heart tightened even more. “I can’t be with someone who thinks I’m weak and in need of protection.”

“You are, without a doubt, a dangerous adversary, sweetheart,” he replied. “You fought me, remember? Every movement was elegant, lethal, and anything but weak.”

“You sent me away like a child.”

“Know why?”

She rolled her eyes. “For my own good.”

“No,” Tarian shook his head. “For mine. The thought of a world without you in it destroys me.” He stared down at her, every line of his face etched with sincerity. “I was trying to protect you because my world stops if you get hurt. It wasn’t a comment on your skills. If anything, it shone a spotlight on my weakness, not yours.”

She snorted. “You have a weakness?”

His hands cupped her face. “When it comes to you I do. I will always try to protect you, Melissa. It’s not an instinct I can shut off. That’s what happens when you find your mate.”

Ripping herself away from the comfort of his touch, she paced over to her living room. She looked out the tall patio windows as she wrapped her arms around herself.

“It’s not just that you didn’t trust me to fight,” she said.

“I know.” The words were soft from behind her.

She saw his reflection in the glass as he stood behind her right shoulder. “I can’t be with someone I can’t trust. Your powers are just too strong, Tarian.”

Hands skimmed over her shoulders in a light touch. “I could vow to you I’d never make this mistake again, but to be honest, I don’t know if that’s a promise I can keep. If I ever saw you in danger again, my instincts would be to save you any way I could.”

Pain slashed through her. Part of her had actually hoped for promises, false or not. Then she would have had an opening, a way of thinking seriously about their future. She could have fooled herself into believing it had only been one slip. That it would never happen again, and she could love him the way that she craved.

But instead he gave her honesty. She should appreciate the gesture instead of damning his integrity.

“Then there is no solution,” she said.

A tiny tinkling reached her ear, and she saw something shine in the window reflection.

Turning, she saw the rield bracelet dangling from Tarian’s fingertips.

“I thought you couldn’t make another,” she breathed, staring at the answer to all their prayers.

“I can’t,” he agreed. “But I was able to secure this one from Dominic before he was tossed into prison.” He wound the silver strand around his fingers. “You know how powerful these pieces are. He wasn’t about to throw it away.”

She reached for it, but he pulled his hand back. “No,” he said. “I’ll not give it away so easily twice.”

Melissa frowned, wondering what new game they were playing.

“The first time I gave you this bracelet I was filled with noble intentions. I thought myself to be an upstanding, moral man who would never stoop to manipulating a lover, no matter how dire the circumstances. I gave you this rield as a way to convince you I could be trusted, not because I thought it would ever matter that you wore it.”

“And now?”

He studied the silver twining around his fingers. “Now I know giving this bracelet away restricts my options. I might have to watch you get hurt one day. Hell, I might have to watch you die, knowing that if I hadn’t given you this rield, I could have saved you.”

“Every couple fears losing each other,” she whispered.

“You took a few decades off my life when Dominic had you under his power,” Tarian said. “I never want to feel that way again.”

“I can protect myself,” she replied. “And what’s more, you can be around to be my backup.”

He inclined his head, playing with the rield. “There’s another piece to consider. You nearly killed me when we fought. Without my magic I’ll be at your mercy.”

She bit back the smile that threatened. “I might be stronger,” she pointed out. “But you also weren’t really fighting me. Dominic might have been pulling the strings but I still remember every moment of that night. You only defended yourself, Tarian. You did everything in your power to avoid hurting me.”

“Always,” he breathed, taking a step closer.

“What if I promise to be gentle with you?” She rose to her tiptoes. One hand pressed against his chest to steady herself as her lips nearly brushed his.

“Trust,” he whispered against her lips. “This all comes down to trust.”

Melissa drew back slightly, meeting his gaze. Trust. She had to trust him not to abuse his powers, and he had to trust her not to take advantage of her immunity with the rield. It was a risk for them both.

Cool metal touched her wrist and she looked down to see Tarian clasping the bracelet over her hand.

“I love you,” he said.

A shudder ran through her. As often as she’d prayed to hear those words, nothing could compare to the reality.

“Be my mate,” Tarian whispered in her ear as he pressed a kiss to the sensitive skin. “Mine for all eternity.”

Tipping her head back, she closed her eyes. His lips trailed down her throat in a gossamer caress.

A startled cry escaped her when he caught her around the waist and twirled her backward toward her high-backed beige couch.

“I don’t care if you won’t give me the words,” he said, pressing her down onto the sofa as he watched her with burning eyes. “I don’t care if it takes me centuries to pry them from you. I know you love me.”

“Centuries, hmm?” She traced her fingers along his jaw.

He caught her fingers and pressed them to his mouth. “Though I do hope it won’t take quite that long.”

She smiled. “Are you so sure I love you, Tarian?”

“Yes.”

“Tell me why.”

He pressed another kiss to her fingertips before drawing her up into a sitting position. “Do you know when Abbey told me you were missing, I experienced a panic I haven’t felt since I was a young man?”

She arched a brow. “What does that have to do with me loving you?”

“Nothing. But it has everything to do with me loving you,” he replied. “I knew then you were important to me. And on the road when you could have run but came back to see if a child needed help, that’s when I knew I wouldn’t be able to forget you.” He turned her palm over and pressed his lips to the tender skin. “But it was when you stood up to your father in order to fight beside me that I knew I’d love you until the end of my days.” Tarian cupped her face between his palms. “How could I travel on this adventure with you, Melissa, and fall for you so completely, without you feeling anything in return?”

“Surely the universe isn’t so cruel,” she teased softly.

A smile curved his lips. “You love me. Whether you admit it or not.”

She reached out to press her hand above his heart. The sturdy thump beneath her fingers steadied her.

“I wanted to hate you when you showed up at Dominic’s ranch,” she said. “And then you insisted I stay with you, and all I wanted to do was escape.”

“I know.” He leaned closer, his lips brushing against her cheek.

“Then you changed everything,” she whispered. “I was never supposed to care for you, but I couldn’t help myself.”

“I understand completely.” His lips brushed against hers.

“You’re the last man I should love.”

“I’m not arguing.”

“So then why can’t I stop?”

He drew back to meet her gaze. “Because we’re meant to be.”

“I love you.” The words burst from her, no longer able to be contained.

Pleasure lit his face. “Again,” he demanded.

“I love you.” The second time was easier than the first. Wrapping her arms around his shoulders, she cast a leg astride his thigh and shifted into his lap. “I loved you even when I didn’t want to.”

“At least we’re caught together.” His hands rose to her hips to stabilize her.

“This won’t be easy,” she said. “With your position, and my father…”

“Don’t you see, sweetheart? None of that matters. Not anymore. No one can separate mates.”

“Promise?”

“Forever.”

His lips claimed hers as she gave herself up to the pleasure of his touch. Everything was different now. He was hers. For eternity. Her mate.

She smiled against his mouth, unable to contain her joy.

“I’m going to have to apologize to Vivian,” she breathed, tilting her head back when he scraped his teeth against her neck.

“No doubt she’ll put us on posters as one of her success stories.”

“Fated Match. Find your mate anytime, anywhere,” she quoted.

“Even the most unsuitable ones.”

“In the most unusual circumstances.” She drove her fingers into his hair. “I don’t know what I would have done had you not walked into that agency.”

“Somehow we would have found each other.” Conviction burned bright in his gaze. “One way or another, you were always my destiny.”

He tumbled her back down onto the couch, not that she had any complaints.

Gazing up at her mate, she knew he was exactly right. No matter how many times the universe had screwed her in the past, bringing Tarian into her life more than made up for it.

“I love you,” she said, pulling him down to her. “Forever.”

He smiled as he kissed her, his touch promising what she already knew. After all her wrong turns, her luck had finally changed. Fate had given her the man of her dreams, and she didn’t intend on ever letting him go.