Dunaway's Crossing (22 page)

Chin tucked into her chest, she quickly dropped the cloth into his hand, then re-crossed her arms against her front. Her heart pounded like a scared rabbit’s. When he stepped away, she turned her head to see him open a cupboard and pull out a glass bottle. He blotted some of its contents on the rag before saying, “This is going to sting a bit."

The tonic roused the wound with a sharp sting, making Bea Dot gasp and draw her hand to her mouth. Biting her lip, she struggled not to voice her pain. The wound throbbed as the medicine did its work. Will tossed the rag on the table and put his warm hands back on Bea Dot’s arms.

“I’m sorry that hurt you,” he murmured. “Are you all right?”

She nodded and exhaled slowly, realizing she’d tensed herself unnecessarily. Will was not Ben.

Will lay a soft kiss just above the offending wound. “It’ll feel much better in a few minutes.”

Bea Dot breathed in deeply, this time not from the pain, but from the exhilaration of feeling his lips against her bare skin. He kissed her softly on the back of her neck, then on its side, then just behind her ear. “Is this all right?” he asked.

She relaxed more, her heart swelling at being asked permission, but her nerves pulsating with exhilaration.  When he nibbled at her earlobe, he reached around her torso and cupped her breast. An interior guardedness recommenced within her, but only momentarily.  Desire for Will subdued her hesitation, and she turned to face him. He put her face in his hands and bent to kiss her deeply, urgently, as if he’d never have the chance to do so again.

He pressed her against him, accidentally brushing his hand against the wound he’d so carefully tended. To Bea Dot’s surprise, instead of smarting, the claw mark felt numb from the medication. With relief, Bea Dot ran her fingers through Will’s hair and held the back of his head as she caressed his lips with her own.

At a grumble from the next room, Will pulled away from her, just far enough that she could look into his eyes. Their depths revealed a wildness, a hunger, she’d never before seen.

“What’s that?” he whispered.

“Netta,” she explained. “We might wake her.”

In one swift motion, Will lifted Bea Dot in his arms. “Take the light,” he told her, and she grasped the handle of the kerosene lamp with one hand while she wrapped her other arm around his neck. As Will carried her into his storage room, the sleeves of her nightgown dangled beneath her. The room smelled of gunpowder, pepper, and leather. Burying her face under his jaw, she took in his earthy scent.

Will first carried Bea Dot to the far wall, where she hung the lantern on a hook. After crossing to his pallet, he knelt and laid her there. The lamplight flickered over her pale skin.

“Are you cold?” he asked.

Bea Dot nodded, her nerves rendering her speechless. Both eager to and afraid of lying with a man, she wondered what she should do. Until now, sex was something done to her. Would it be the same when done with her?

Will must have noticed her tension because he stroked her cheek with his forefinger. “Your skin is like silk,” he whispered. He nuzzled her neck, and she relaxed at the sound of his inhalation. Straightening, he put his finger under her chin and lifted her gaze to his. “Don’t worry.” He must have read her mind. “I won’t hurt you. If you want me to stop, just say the word.”

She nodded, still cautious, but grateful for his sensitivity. But in spite of her trepidation, stopping was the last thing Bea Dot wanted.

He pulled her nightgown over her hips and legs and tossed it behind them as he gazed at her body. “My stars, you are so beautiful.”

Bea Dot’s mouth twitched into a weak smile. No one had ever spoken to her that way before. She began to shiver, partly from cold, but mostly from nerves. She stiffened at this intimate stage fright.

He unbuttoned his shirt, then lay next to her. Though she loved the sensation of his skin against hers, she felt lost. What should she do now? Her lips found his, and to her relief, he grasped her hand and pulled her arm around his bare waist as he maneuvered over her. Fear and uncertainty combined with her pent up affection for him, and a new sensation—an urgency of sorts—swelled within her.

Will raised himself on his elbows and looked down into her eyes. She knew the intensity in them mirrored her own. “I can’t believe I’m finally lying here with you,” he whispered to her. “All the while I was in Pineview, I couldn’t get you out of my mind.”

Bea Dot’s heart soared at his words, his feelings alleviating her fear. She smiled and combed her fingers through the hair on his chest. “I’ve missed you too,” she whispered. After a pause, she added, “I think I want to do this. You’ll think I’m silly, but I don’t really know…”

How could she articulate her trepidation?

“We’ll go slow,” he said. Then he rolled to his side and unfastened his belt and pants. Bea Dot helped tug them over his legs, which fascinated her with their lean muscles.

For the next few minutes he lay next to her, holding her, caressing her, until her skittishness subsided.

“Do you want to keep going?” he asked.

She nodded, and he rolled on top of her, easing himself into her.  The pleasure of the erotic experience blended perfectly with her adoration for him. Finally, she understood the joy of making love.

Afterward, she lay tucked in the crook of his arm, her head on his chest, tracing the lines of his muscles with her index finger. His lean body intrigued her. She’d had no idea a man’s physique could be so alluring. As her hand surveyed his rib cage, it found a long dimple in the skin. She examined it manually until she realized she’d found a scar. Will’s hand covered hers and squeezed it gently.

“Did I hurt you?” she asked.

He shook his head silently, but she knew the sensitivity she’d found ran deeper than flesh.

“The war?”

Will nodded, then uttered a quiet “yes.”

Bea Dot didn’t pry, fully understanding the need to lock some memories away to move beyond them. Instead, she kissed him sweetly on the lips and said, “I’m glad you’re home and here with me.”

Will turned to face her. He lifted her hand to his face and kissed her palm, still punctured from briars. “Then be with me always.”

Her insides flipped. She hadn’t expected a proposal. She bit her lip as she stroked his tussled hair, wanting nothing more than to stay with him in this moment. But a pang of reluctance held her back as she remembered all the questions she’d mulled over earlier. Did they have to make this decision now? Unsure how to reply, she reached her face toward his and kissed him, breathing in the scent of him, trying to commit it to memory.

He returned the kiss at first, but then pulled away and regarded her solemnly. “Is that how you’re going to answer me? With a kiss?”

Bea Dot tried to make light of the question, raising her eyebrows as she spoke. “Don’t you like it?”

“Very much. I hope to get more, but I don’t know if a kiss means yes or no.”

Now Bea Dot pressed her lips in ambivalence. As she grasped for the right words to reply, Will continued.

“Do you love me, Bea Dot? Or do you just want me?”

“How could you ask that?” Her eyes widened in surprise. If he only knew what a huge leap of trust she’d just taken, he wouldn’t question her feelings.

“Because you haven’t said one way or the other. I love you. I’m sure of it. But if you don’t feel the same way, it’s best you tell me now.”

“Of course I love you, Will. I wish I could marry you tomorrow, but I’m already someone else’s wife.” And that was only part of the problem.

“I know,” he replied, still holding her hand, stroking her fingers with his thumb. “But you don’t have children, so maybe your husband would agree to a divorce.”

“I wish it were that easy.” Bea Dot sighed and sat up, drawing her knees to her chest. She shivered in the chilly darkness. “But it’s more complicated than that. There’s…there’s so much you don’t know.” What if he found out about her past? Would he still feel the same way? Would she be able to keep the truth from him for the rest of her life?

Will draped a blanket over her back, then rubbed his palm over the scratchy fabric. “The day you came to Pineview…” he began. After a pause, he added, “He’d hurt you, hadn’t he?”

Was she that transparent? Her face burned with shame. She wrapped her arms around her knees and placed her forehead on her kneecaps.

Will kept his head close to hers as he spoke. “Netta constantly asks about Ralph. You’ve never uttered a word about your husband. It’s not hard to put two and two together.”

Face still to her knees, she held her palm up, tacitly asking Will to drop the subject. Instead, he took her hand in his and kissed it.

“All I’m saying is that if you’ve come this far from him, we might as well make that final step.”

“That’s easy for you to say,” Bea Dot replied, finally looking at Will. “You just don’t know—” How could she tell him without saying too much?

“Is it money? I can’t give you the big house and fine clothes he does, but we wouldn’t have to live here at the crossing. We could have a nice house in town.”

“Of course not,” she replied sharply. “I’d rather be here than there. It’s just that I’m afraid.”

“Of what?”

“Of everything. Who knows what he’ll do if I ask for a divorce?” Ben’s violence was one thing. But his scheming temper was another. Surely during divorce proceedings, Ben would paint her as a promiscuous woman. If Will learned of her illegitimate child, she could lose him. And then she’d have nowhere to go.

“I just jumped in between you and a bobcat,” he smiled teasingly. “If I can take that, what’s to be afraid of?”

She pulled in the corner of her lip and gave him a sober stare, not in the mood for jokes.

“Listen,” he continued more earnestly, “I’m by your side. Whatever happens, I’ll go through it with you.”

She nodded, still uncertain. Will’s proposal sent her mind whirling. In the past few hours, she’d fought off a wild animal, fallen in love, and enjoyed the greatest sensual pleasure of her life. Now she was contemplating a venture into the lion’s den. The day had been too much for her. All of a sudden she needed to be alone. She fumbled around in the dim light until she found her nightgown, which she slipped over her head. As she stood, Will propped himself on his elbows and gazed at her sadly.

“Are you leaving?”

“I don’t want Netta to know I’ve been with you. Not yet, anyway.”

“You still haven’t answered my question.”

She knelt beside him and pressed her face into his neck. “I know. Give me some time?”

Will sighed. “I have no choice, do I?”

She shook her head and kissed him. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

Will yawned and stretched on his lumpy pallet. For the first time since returning from France, he’d slept soundly all night. Just one more way Bea Dot was good for him. Although he understood her hesitation, he hoped to convince her to ask her husband for a divorce.

He rose and rinsed his face, the chilly water in the wash basin shocking him awake. After brushing his teeth and combing his hair, he dressed and took his coat off the nail before going into the kitchen.

He found Netta sitting at the table, a half-eaten biscuit on a plate in front of her. She looked up at him with eyes underscored with dark circles. Pregnancy had rounded her face so that even her nose looked swollen. Though he would never say so aloud, it was probably better that Ralph couldn’t see her.

“Good morning,” he said. He hung his coat on the back of a chair.

“Good morning,” she replied quietly. “Would you like breakfast?”

“I’ll make it, but thank you,” he replied. He opened the pie safe and pulled out a biscuit and the honey. Then he dipped out a cup of water from the bucket. “Would you like me to brew some coffee?”

“No, thank you, Will,” she replied, concentrating on her biscuit.

“It’s no trouble.”

“Truly, I’m fine.” Netta waved her hand in refusal.

“Maybe Bea Dot would like some,” he said, picking up the coffee pot.

“She’s not up yet,” Netta said.

“Oh? She’s still asleep?”

“She was up late last night,” Netta said. After a pause, she added, “As you know.”

As he put the coffee pot down,  his face and neck burned with embarrassment, then irritation. What gave Netta Coolidge the right to comment on what he did in his own house? Still, he bit his tongue as he sat at the table and spooned honey on his biscuit. The two sat in silence a few moments before Netta continued.

“Will, I know you’re fond of Bea Dot, but she’s a married woman.”

Will forced himself not to roll his eyes. “Yes, I know that.”

“What are your intentions, then?”

“Isn’t that something her father should ask?”

“Perhaps, but I’m the closest thing to that,” Netta said bluntly, “so you get to deal with me.”

“I’ve asked her to marry me,” Will said, looking straight into Netta’s eyes.

“Oh.” She raised her eyebrows. “Then do you want her to divorce her husband?”

“We discussed it.”