Drowning in Deception (29 page)

This animal did not glow the beautiful
blue that Rye had, and she bet that a human would not either. That was the
difference. Blue was Carnae. Red was prey.

She held her breath, watching the
creature for a while. But the look of its warm blood became too much for her.
She could feel saliva drip from her fangs and run down her chin. She pounced, a
claw catching the throat of the little being and quickly digging deep. There
was a startled yelp and she made quick work of the kill. She wanted to taste.

Her teeth ripped through the burly fur,
tearing off chunks of skin to find the good stuff. Ah, the blood was warm and
satisfying. And beyond that was the meat, so tender and chewy. Never before had
she experienced something so delicious and satisfying. She gorged heartily and,
when she was done, she lay back on the ground, completely gratified, and burped
before dozing off, completing sated.

Clover’s eyes opened to the sight of
moonlight glowing behind a tall pine tree. She remembered what had happened,
but at some point she’d lost track of Rye. Had they shared her kill? She had been
so into what she’d been doing that she hadn’t noticed if he’d been right beside
her the whole time or not. And she had no clue how long she’d been asleep.

As she remembered in vivid detail what
she had done, it surprised her that she felt no remorse. There was no guilt at
having hunted, killed, and devoured a fellow creature. It felt like the most
natural thing she’d ever done. She almost wished for remorse, but felt none.
She only felt satisfied.

She raised a hand in the dim light and
saw her regular fingernails, which showed the last remnants of pinkish purple
polish. Apparently she’d been aware enough to find a dry patch of ground under
thick trees to lie down on, but the biting cold air started nipping her,
causing her to shiver.

She lifted her head when there was a
stirring on the ground beside her. It was Rye. He’d been asleep right beside
her. She snuggled in close to him, greedily soaking up his warmth.

“How do you feel?” he asked.

She smiled. “I feel great.” She tilted
her chin to gaze into his eyes. “I never would have believed it, but I feel
great.”

His response was a light kiss to her
lips.

“So, is it common for the Carnae…for us,”
she corrected, “to hunt together?”

“It’s rare, but it does happen.” He
turned his head to gaze up at the moon, so she did the same. “But we never
share a kill.”

“Oh. So you just sat and watched me?”

“No,” he laughed. “I went after a buck a
few yards away.”

She grabbed his hand and continued gazing
up at the moon. “Can I ask some questions?”

“Sure.”

“Why did it take so long for me to
change? I mean, I’ve been off the milk and the drugs for quite a while now.
I’ve been really, really mad a lot of times. Why did it take until now for me
to transition?”

He considered the question for a moment.
“I’m not really sure. I think it probably took a while for the drugs to
completely leave your system. You’d been on them your whole life. And then,
well I guess, you’re so used to being composed and controlling yourself that it
took something big to really make you feel full blown out-of-control emotions.”

“Hmm…makes sense. Your insides glowed blue.
Is that how you tell the difference between us and regular humans?”

“Yes.”

She had an abundance of questions
filling her up. She loved the freeing feeling that curiosity gave her, so she
continued to ask whatever popped into her head. “How often does the transition
happen for most?”

“Well, it’s different for everyone. Some
people are just naturally more emotional than others, so there’s really no way
to predict it. And most of us have gotten pretty good at relaxing ourselves in
times of stress so that we won’t get shot when the gods come.”

She stared at the moon with the tip of
the tree gently swaying in front of it. The next question was awkward. How
should she phrase it?

She took a deep breath. “How do the
Carnae…procreate?”

A booming laugh shot from his mouth. “You
mean how do we have sex?”

“Uh-huh.” She was glad for the dark the
shadows of the trees provided because she was certain her cheeks were deep red.

“The same way other people do. Do you
need a lesson?” He chuckled, which caused her face to burn hotter.

“That’s not what I mean. I mean…how do
you make it that far if you change every time things get…you know…hot and
heavy?”

“Oh. I see what you’re saying.” He
chuckled again. “Well, we don’t change every time things get…hot and heavy. I
guess it just depends on the situation and your current emotions at the time… You
know…how intense they are. Sometimes it’s the moment of sexual climax that
starts the transition. And I have heard of people doing it right after they
change. Although I’m not sure how they manage that since the instinct to run
and hunt is so strong. But I guess it’s possible for some.”

He turned on his side to face her with a
smirk. “We’ll have to try it some time.”

She hit his arm.

He sat up. “C’mon. It’s freezing out. You
should get back now.”

She sat up and shivered. “I’m not ready
to go. I want to stay with you tonight.”

***

They spent the night in Rye’s little
wooden one-room house. Clover slept sounder than she could ever remember.

In the morning he wanted to go and check
on Delila, wanted to go and visit his mother, Arma, and Abilee. He also wanted
to introduce Clover to everyone. But she wasn’t ready for that yet. It was too
soon for the world to know that she was Carnae, when she’d barely accepted it
herself.

“C’mon,” he urged. “You already know
Arma and Abilee.”

She shook her head.

“Please, Clove. I’m in love with you. I
want the world to know it, and I want to show you off.”

“No. I’m just not…in the mood for
socializing today.”

He narrowed his eyes at her. She could
easily read in them his accusation of her shame for being a Carnae. Maybe he
was right. She didn’t know what to say.

They had a quick lunch of biscuits and
cheese. Rye’s face was solid anger the whole time. He said very little, and
Clover, feeling awkward around him for the first time in a long time, was very
quiet herself.

His words were gruff when he told her
that he had work to get caught up on, that the supplies wouldn’t get to the
helichopper platform by themselves. So he walked her to the door in the Wall and
quickly apologized that he didn’t have time to take her to the boundary line.

They lingered at the door for a moment.
Clover was unsure what to say. He was being so aloof. And after everything
she’d experienced the night before, what she really needed was his
understanding, his compassion.

He gave her a quick peck on the
forehead. “Okay. I have to go.”

When she said nothing, he turned to
leave. “Rye…”

He looked back.

“Are you mad at me?”

His face was pained. “No, Clove. I’m not
mad.”

They stared at each other for a long
minute. Finally he stepped toward her, but he didn’t touch her. “I think you
should stay away tonight. You need time to… I don’t know. Sort things through?
Come to terms with who and what you are, and figure out what you want to do
about it.”

“What I want to do about it? What’s that
supposed to mean? Do I really have a choice?”

He grunted. “Yeah, you do.”

She looked at him, unsure of what he was
getting at.

He shook his head, frustrated. “You can
either embrace what you are and live as one of us. If that’s what you choose,
I’m here for you. I love you, and I’ll be with you every step of the way.”

“Or?”

“Or you can start drinking milk again
and follow in your father’s footsteps.”

She shot him a nasty glare. This was all
so confusing for her. How could he be so cold about it?

“Sorry, Clove. I gotta go. Stay away
tonight, okay? Give yourself some time. I’ll be here waiting for you tomorrow
night. No matter what you decide, please come. Don’t leave me wondering. I need
to know where I…where we stand.”

She stood and watched him walk away. Why
did everything have to be so complicated? Until that moment she hadn’t given
much thought to her choices. It seemed to her that she no longer fit into
either of the worlds that the Wall divided. But of one thing she was certain.
She loved Rye.

***

It was mid-afternoon when Clover
returned to the little home that now housed Zander, Sera, Smith, Luas, Joseph,
Darna, and herself. To top off the coziness, Gart seemed to be there whenever
he was not working at the Watch Tower. All she wanted was to be alone for a
while, to do as Rye had said and think things through, but that was not to be.

The second she opened the door, Zander
grabbed her and pulled her into a hug. “Clover. Where have you been? When you
didn’t come back I was sure you were dead. Sera said things got really ugly at
the platform last night and…”

“Give the girl some room to breathe.”
Sera grabbed Zander and pulled him off Clover. “We were just getting started
here. Come. Sit.”

Clover looked over to the living room
where all the usual people were gathered, with one new addition. Gart’s sister,
Gardenia, was seated next to him. She gave Clover a little smile and wave.

Clover looked at Gart. He shrugged.

Apparently alone time was not going to
happen, so Clover perched herself on the arm of the couch and asked, “What’s
up?”

“Well,” said Gart. “A couple of us spent
the morning walking around the city. We were people-watching.”

“It’s working,” said Sera with a wide
grin. “A lot of people have stopped drinking milk. You can tell. Some look
angry, some are crying. And the eyes - their eyes look clearer, focussed.”

“Well, that’s good. And what about the
newspaper story about how we steal from the people of Quell?”

Gart spoke up. “Well, from what we can
tell by listening in on conversations, it seems like the majority of people are
pissed over the fact that the Watch Tower has known about the ‘poison’ but done
nothing about it. But there are a handful of people who are upset to know that
we survive by stealing from others. But they’re not sure if they should believe
it or not. Of course they didn’t even know there were people living on the
other side of the Wall.”

“It’s hard to say for sure how things
will go at the Watch Tower meeting tomorrow,” Sera added. “But at the very
least we have a lot more people that are willing to stand up against the ways
of the Watch Tower.”

“Well, that’s good news.”

There was a knock at the door, so Zander
went to answer it.

“Clover, it’s for you.”

She got up and went to the door to find
Mella standing on the front step. Mascara stained her reddened cheeks.

“What’s wrong?”

“Can we talk in private?” She sniffled.

“Sure.” Clover took her jacket from a
hook by the door and stepped outside, closing the door behind her. “What is it?”

“I’ve missed you,” she said.

“I’ve missed you too.” There was
something noticeably different about Mella. Her eyes were steady, not dreamy
like Clover was used to.

“So, have you heard about the milk poison
thing?”

Clover nodded, unsure how much
information she should offer Mella just yet.

“Well, my mother panicked when she read
about it being poisoned. She dumped out all the milk. She didn’t want to take
any chances. The headache is starting to get better today.”

Clover waited for her to go on.

“Well, I feel different. Everything
seems different, but just subtly, you know?”

Clover nodded again. She knew exactly
what Mella meant.

“I went to see Chantille. Her parents
told her that it was somebody’s idea of a joke and that they shouldn’t stop
drinking milk, so she didn’t. She’s so…weird. Just stood there smiling like
everything was okay. But it’s not okay. I’m so confused. I didn’t know where
else to go. Your mom gave me this address. I hoped you weren’t weird like Chantille.
You’re the only friend I have left.” She burst into tears.

Clover wrapped an arm around her
friend’s shoulder. “No. I’m not weird. And I completely understand how you
feel. I stopped drinking milk quite a while ago, so I know what you’re going
through.”

“And what about that other stuff in the
second article? My mom is just up in arms about it. Going on about how just
because the monsters are dangerous doesn’t give us the right to be cruel to
them. Is any of it true?”