Drive Me Crazy (25 page)

“She’s just trying to make everyone happy.” He walked to the bar and poured himself two fingers of bourbon. He needed to be able to sleep without dreaming about her, a feat he hadn’t managed since he set eyes on her.

“Even you? I was shocked every time Alli would tell me where you were. You must have talked pretty fast to get her to agree.”

“Well, I was driving. I got to point the car where I wanted to go.” Except when she drove, and got a ticket, and they wound up in a motel and everything changed.

“She must have been pretty mellow. Usually Jaime is a force to be reckoned with. But then, maybe she just doesn’t like me.”

“She loves you. I think she was nice to me because I’m your friend.”

Trent cleared his throat. “Why did you take her all those places anyway? Every day, Alli had a different story about Mt. Rushmore and those haunted places
–
she even tried to explain that you went to the Stonehenge of cars. What was all that about?”

“I don’t know what you mean.” He drained his glass with a wince.

“It was like you were taking a tour of America. What’s going on with you?”

“Nothing. Just a vacation.”

“You usually vacation at resorts. This was different.”

“Because you decided to get married. I’ve told you how tedious flying is now. Every time a plane makes a stop they have to check your passport. Driving was easier.”

“There is something you’re not saying. I’m your best friend. I know these things. What’s going on?”

“Nothing. There were just things I wanted to see, that’s all.” He sunk into the chair opposite Trent. “Are you ready for tomorrow?”

“I’m relieved it’s finally here. I’m telling you, man, if you ever get married, elope. Weddings are a bitch.” His voice went up two octaves. “What kind of cake do you want? Can you book the band? No, not that kind of band. You’re wearing what? What do you think of this tablescape?” He groaned, his voice coming back to normal. “Do you even know what a tablescape is?”

“Don’t need to. You sold me on elopement.”

“I’m glad. Don’t get me wrong, if it makes Alli happy I‘m all for it, but I’m more than ready for it to be over.”

He leaned forward and planted his hands on his knees. “Trent? Does it feel different with Alli or are you just ready to be married?”

“You think I’d be celibate for two years just because I wanted to get married?” Trent sat up straight. “You’re one stupid schmuck.”

“
Baise toi.
” He smiled, wondering if Trent would recall how to swear in French.

“
Va te faire foutre.
Who do you think you’re in love with?”

“I don’t.” He scrubbed his face with his hands, the day’s worth of beard growth scratching his palms. It made him wonder if he’d scratched Jaime’s face last night.

He didn’t want to think of Jaime anymore.

“You’ve fallen in love with someone.”

“That’s as stupid as putting a handbrake in a canoe.”

“Why? Because of your mother?”

Everything in the room froze, even the air. “Don’t talk about my mother.”

“Listen, Xav, I understand
–
”

“You understand nothing.” He pushed out of the chair and walked to the window. He did not want to talk about it. It was almost a year later, and the wound of losing his mother still felt raw.

“Okay. I get that you still don’t want to talk about it.”

“There is nothing to talk about. My mother was ill, she died and life goes on. There is no point in dissecting and rehashing.”

“All I’m saying is you’ve been different since the funeral. When my mom died
–
”

“
Zut!
I said stop. Why do you turn into a woman when you drink?” He turned, expecting Trent to continue. Instead he found the man shaking his head and holding up his hands in surrender.

“Look, if you ever want to talk, fine. If not, you stew in it. I just know that for me, it was hard to even think about losing someone I loved again. I thought if I didn’t let anyone in, then I wouldn’t ever hurt that way again. But no matter how hard you try, you can’t stay numb forever.”

Trent rose from the couch and walked to one of the bedrooms of the suite, slamming the door behind him. Xavier shook his head and turned back to the window.

What did Trent know anyway? A drunk driver had killed his mother instantly. He didn’t have to watch her be eaten alive from the inside out, watch her body dissolve into nothing. He didn’t have to sit at a bedside and realize life had moved by so fast he barely knew the woman he had to mourn.

Since his mother died, Xavier hadn’t let his mind wander here. His sister had cried enough for the entire family, and he’d held her while she did, a hollow feeling growing inside. He’d hoped taking the trip to see all the things his mother had wanted to show him would fill up that space, and he’d succeeded. He hadn’t found his mother on the trip, but he’d found something that made his soul overflow with joy.

Unfortunately, neither he nor Jaime were in a position to do anything about it. He couldn’t stay a minute longer than he planned. Marie-Chloe employed hundreds of people who depended on him to be there, not to mention his father and sister who relied on him as well. He had to leave, and Jaime wasn’t willing to go.

He’d done the unthinkable. He still had a gaping hole in his heart from losing his mother, and as soon as he left he’d rip open another one at losing Jaime.

Chapter Nineteen

Jaime adjusted the long lace veil draped over Allison’s head. Between the two layers of silk and the lace, it was impossible to know Allison was beneath the veil.

“Okay, you’re ready. I’m going to let them in now.” Jaime moved to leave, but Allison gripped her hand.

“Trent first. Promise me.”

With a grin, Jaime kissed her sister’s hand. She’d been like this since she woke up this morning, her mind set only on making sure Trent saw her before anyone else. “I promised.”

Leaving her sister in the upholstered chair, Jaime smiled at her mother as she moved to the double doors. She peeked into the crowded foyer, nodding at their youngest brother who was standing guard. From his pocket, he pulled a note card and cleared his throat.

“Our family would like to invite the groom to veil his bride for the final step in these preparations for the wedding today. We perform this ritual because of a lesson learned by our forefather Jacob, who did not unveil his bride until after the ceremony, and then learned he had not wed his intended. We invite you to witness this bedeckening, but ask that you remain in the foyer to give Allison and Trent their privacy at this special moment.”

Tears stung Jaime’s eyes as she pushed open the doors, wondering just when her brother had turned into a man. Probably the same time her baby sister had become old enough to get married.

With the doors open people crushed forward, but respectfully stayed outside the threshold of the room. Jaime stepped aside, her eyes welling up as Trent lifted the layers of silk with a trembling hand. She looked away so as not to cry, but her gaze snagged on Xavier, standing tall and proud at the entrance to the room. A vision flashed in her mind of a veil being lifted from her face and Xavier coming into view.

She blinked out the image, unwilling to feel sorry for herself on the happiest day of her sister’s life. Turning back to the room, she watched as Trent set aside the veils, pressed two fingers to his lips and then to Allison’s.

The guests were encouraged to take their seats and the rabbi reviewed the ceremony in a blur of words Jaime barely heard. Instead she fixated on how she was going to handle touching Xavier. They had to walk down the aisle to the
chuppah
together. Last night she’d worn long sleeves and hurried through the motions so as not to have to deal with her feelings. But today her emotions ran high, and her skin was bare thanks to the sleeveless gown.

“J’aime?” The dulcet tone of Xavier’s voice rolled through her. “You need this.”

She turned to see him standing before her holding a gold ring in his outstretched hand. For a split second she imagined he was presenting her with the ring, but then her mind kicked in and realized it was the gold band Allison would give to Trent. She took the ring carefully from his fingers, noting the inscription.

“I am my beloved’s, and my beloved is mine.” She nearly choked as her voice thickened with every word. How was it possible the world could be so cruel as to allow her to love someone, to belong to someone, and not have those feelings returned?

“It’s a lovely sentiment.” Xavier offered her his arm, nodding in the direction of the rabbi they were to follow. He took her hand, her skin tingling as he slid the ring onto her thumb. A smaller version caught the light and shone on his pinky.

When he kissed her hand she nearly swooned. Life should really not be allowed to be this tempting. With a shake of her head, Jaime collected the bouquets from a side table and moved to bring one to Allison.

As she slipped the lilies into her sister’s hand, she leaned close to her ear. “You deserve every moment of this. Enjoy it. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Allie’s arms around her neck warmed her. The hug from her mother that followed gave her the strength to return to Xavier. Today was about Allison and the perfect wedding.

Nothing else mattered.

Sheer torture. Xavier had never been so uncomfortable in all his life. It was as if his soul was trying to claw out of his skin to get to Jaime. Even having to step away from her once they reached the
chuppah
, draped with the same silk and lace he’d noticed Allison used for her veil, was painful.

Seeing Trent walk down the aisle with only his father twisted Xavier’s gut. Even as beautiful as all this was, he’d rather never marry than walk to the bridal canopy without his mother.

Allison and her parents followed. Once they reached the
chuppah
, the bride walked around her groom seven times, and then stepped forward to join hands with him. Then they reached out, the parents joining hands for an unbroken circle, the families forever joined.

He glanced to Jaime, noting the pained look on her face. He wondered if she was thinking of her sister, or of him? Wishful thinking on his part, yet as the
ketubah
was read and explained to the guests to be a binding contract for the marriage, he wondered just what he’d have to do for more time with her.

Every word the rabbi said seemed to resonate, sending his mind wandering to what it would be like to make these kinds of promises. Of course, Trent and Allison were grinning like fools, the perfect picture of matrimonial bliss. But then, they’d had two years to work out the kinks.

By the time the rings were exchanged and Trent had insured a long marriage by stomping a wine glass to bits, Xavier knew he had to make another proposition to Jaime. But for the life of him he didn’t know what that would be.

“Are you wearing a watch?” Jaime leaned back against the double doors, wishing she were anywhere but standing next to the one man she needed to avoid today. Tomorrow he’d wing his way home and it would be far easier to be lonely alone.

“I think they’ve earned their time.” He pushed up the sleeve of his tux, overhead lights glinting off his golden cufflinks. For goodness sakes, she even found the sparse hairs on his wrist sexy as he looked at his watch. “Five more minutes, in case they are doing something other than eating.”

“Allison hasn’t eaten since dinner last night, and that girl never misses a meal.” Jaime smoothed the soft silk of her gown, hoping her palms weren’t sweaty. “This is the most brilliant of all the Jewish wedding traditions.”

“You think?”

One scandalous glance from Xavier spun a million images in her mind of things they’d done, and more she’d dreamed of doing. Jaime braced herself with a hand against the door, taking a soothing breath before trying to act nonchalant.

“
Yichud
is inspired. How many weddings have you been to where the couple runs through the day without a single minute alone? Giving them a quiet moment after the ceremony to absorb everything? It’s brilliant.”

“It makes me think twice about agreeing to sign anyone’s
ketubah
though. I’d forgotten about this part, having to guard the door like a Victorian chaperone.”

“Better to be here than holding off the hungry in the reception hall.”

“True, and it does give us a moment to talk.” He gave her the smile of an accomplished seducer, tempting her with the mystery that lay in wait behind his emerald eyes.

The wood-paneled wall on the opposite side of the hall was a much safer choice than chancing falling for the charms embedded in Xavier Moreau. “We don’t have much to talk about. We’re going in different directions, towards different goals. If we were in the same place, physically and emotionally, maybe things would be different. But we’re not, and drawing out the inevitable doesn’t do anyone any good.”

“How many times did you practice that?” From the corner of her eye she caught his half-grin.

“It makes sense.”

“You’re not much of a gambler, are you, Jaime?”

“What does that have to do with anything?” She clenched her jaw as he took a sideways step, their bodies touching.