Drifting into Darkness (11 page)

“Good mornin’, dear. Lisa is already in the bean house so go on down there after you’ve signed in,” she smiled.

“Okay, thanks.”

After signing in, I told Nan I’d see her later, and then made my way to the bean house. They already had beans on the conveyer and Marco was already working on the bags.

“Hola, Seniorita,” Marco beamed.

“Hola, Marco,” I smiled. His happy mood was infectious even though I wasn’t fully awake yet.

Lisa looked up with a smile when she heard Marco. “Hey, there you are.” I walked up to the conveyer and took my place beside Lisa, wiping at the sweat that had already formed. “How ya feelin’ today?”

I turned my head slowly and looked at her dismayed. “I feel like someone ran me over with a Mack truck.”

This caused her to giggle as she picked at the beans. I raised an eyebrow at her in question. “Girl, you’re preachin’ to the choir over here. I know exactly what ya mean.” I scanned the beans and picked out the bad ones, tossing them in the bucket at my feet as she continued. “Back when I first started, it was hard for me to get out of bed. Especially at fifteen, dawn was an unheard of time. But you’ll get used to it. It’ll take your body a week or so.”

“I’m hoping sooner than that. I feel like an old woman. I bet Nan got ready faster this morning than I did,” I joked.

Lisa shook her head and laughed. “So, today’s Friday. It’s goin’ to be a little different than other days of the week. Fridays are Derek and Landon’s days off. They live on the farm so it’s inevitable that they work on the weekends too. So on Fridays they do the things they need to do that they can’t do on the weekend.”

“Who takes care of the horses then?” I knew that this was one of the main things Landon did around the farm. I wanted to know if I’d be dealing with anyone else in his absence.

“Well, he already let the horses out to the pasture this mornin’, but he won’t be back out there until later this afternoon to bring ’em in. Marco will help with the corn bags this morning and you’ll be on your own at the stables.” She turned to look at me. “You okay with bein’ on your own?”

I knew she was asking me because I told her about my shovel breaking the day before, but kept the confrontation to myself. She had laughed and said she’d told Landon to buy a new shovel for months or use the ones in the shed, but he’d never gotten around to it or took the time to get the other ones. “Yeah, I should be fine.”

“Just for future reference, there’s a phone in the office in the stable. The number to the front office is listed on it. So if you ever need anythin’ and no one’s there, just call it.”

I nodded in understanding and we continued picking the beans for another forty minutes, until it was time to bag the corn again. Lisa said that it was pretty much the same routine every day. The only time things changed was when the weather changed. Mr. Johnson always made a final call at the end of the work day as to whether or not we’d work if a storm was supposed to come the following day. Usually, he’d give you notice, but there were some instances where a thunderstorm developed in the middle of the day and he’d send the workers home.

We went to lunch at ten thirty and I again drooled over Mrs. Johnson’s food. She made a sandwich called a mufalotta. It had all of my favorite meats and some kind of olive relish. I’d never had anything like it before and hoped she’d make it again soon.

Joe also ate lunch with us, but said he wasn’t staying to swim. “I help out with all of Derek’s jobs since he’s not here, so I work through my lunches usually,” he said with a mouthful of food. “Which is fine with me since I get off early anyway.” He had a point. I’d work through lunch too if it allowed me to get off early. “So,” he said after taking a bite of his sandwich, “are you coming to the race tonight?”

I shook my head and wiped my mouth with a napkin. “Nah. I was extremely tired last night. I’m sure I will be again today. I’d probably fall asleep.”

He laughed. “There is no way you’d fall asleep. There’s too much going on. Plus there’s no way you’d sleep through all that noise.”

I shrugged my shoulders. “I’ll think about it,” I said to appease him.

A smile spread across his face. “If you do come, you are more than welcome to sit with me,” he winked as he got up from the table. “See y’all later.” He waved as he walked off.

Lisa had a grin on her face. “Don’t mind him. He’s just a big flirt and you’re fresh meat.”

“Fresh meat?”

“Yeah, ya know, someone new and shiny all the cool kids want to play with. Plus you’re not drooling all over Landon. He probably thinks he has a shot.”

“Great,” I sighed. “But there’s nothing here I’ll be letting any of the cool kids play with,” I replied.

We finished our lunch and went swimming. Actually, I wouldn’t even call it swimming. We were only in there long enough to make it feel like a tease, and then we had to get out. It was more like a quick bath in chemical water to wash off a half-day’s worth of sweat.

When our time was up, we hopped onto the four-wheeler and went to the office to sign back in. Lisa headed off to the bean house and I got back on the four-wheeler and headed for the stables.

It was a cloudy day so the heat wasn’t as bad as it could have been and I was grateful. After being so tired the day before, I forgot to stop and get some sunblock on the way home. I made a mental note to remember to do that after work. Even though I had an olive completion and I tanned very easily, I could also burn if I got too much at one time.

I arrived at the stables and walked straight into the office to get a bottle of Gatorade. I knew I’d need it with as much sweating as I did the day before. I stopped and looked at the desk and noticed some stuff had been moved around from Landon being there, but some car magazines joined the clutter.

Leaving the office, I opened up my Gatorade, taking a few gulps before I walked into the first stall. The same stall I started out in the day before. I stopped in my tracks as I noticed the brand new shovel and rake up against the wall. I looked behind me and around the stables as if someone was going to pop out of nowhere. Landon must have gone and got it last night or this morning, not being able to put it off any longer. Although, with the way he was behaving toward me, I was surprised he even bothered. Maybe Mom was right. Maybe he was just having a bad day.

Setting my drink down, I grabbed the rake and went about cleaning up the stall. I’d have to start bringing my iPod for this part of the day. If I had to clean up poop for two hours, at least I could do it while listening to some good music.

~*~

It didn’t take me nearly as long to clean the stalls this time around, with a shovel that actually worked. I was able to make it back to the corn house to help Lisa get more bags done before we left for the day.

I parted ways with Lisa and told her I’d text her if I did decide to go to the race or after party. I didn’t really know anyone and that was my biggest motivation in saying no, but I’d never meet anyone if I didn’t go. The situation reminded me of what my mom said to me when I was little about making new friends. ‘How do you expect to make any friends if you never talk to anyone?’ Erin was the first girl I talked to on my second day of kindergarten and we became instant best friends.

After stopping at CVS on the way home to get sunblock, I made it home in forty minutes. I walked up my stairs and into my place, throwing my purse on the table next to the door, and went straight to the bathroom for a shower.

I knew I’d call Erin as soon as I got out so I stayed in there longer than I was going to. I didn’t know what to say. She hadn’t tried to call or text after that first night. I knew she was giving me space. She knew me and how I’d react. We’d had fights and arguments before, but this was different. I felt like she betrayed me, but then again, I knew she was just being a friend. I just needed to call her and tell her that this all needed to be put behind us. If I wanted to get over what the asshole did, then I needed to let it go. Holding grudges never fixed anything and I didn’t want to lose her over him.

I dried off after getting out of the shower and got dressed in a pair of yoga pants and a V-neck tee. I was going to make the phone call in my room while I lay on my bed, but thought better of it. I’d probably fall asleep in the middle of our conversation, so I went to the living room and sat on the couch instead.

I dialed her number and waited.

“Hey,” she answered.

“Hey,” I replied.  She didn’t say anything so I continued. “I wanted to talk to you about the other day.”

“Yeah,” she snapped. I knew this was coming. She was in her defense mode.

“Just listen to everything I say before you start talking, okay?” Silence. “I know you’re pissed that I basically accused you of being a bad friend, but you have to see it from my point of view. I was hurt and you are the last person I ever thought could hurt me like that. I understand what you were trying to do, though. And honestly, I just want to forget it all. I’m so sick of all of it. I’m ready to move on and I can’t do it if we’re still fighting because he’s the cause of that too. I love you and I’m sorry for being such a bitch.” The line was silent again and I waited a few seconds to see if she would say anything. When she didn’t, I got worried. “Erin, are you there?”

“Yeah,” she said in a cracked voice before clearing her throat. “I’m so sorry too, and I agree, I want to move past it too. I was so worried when I didn’t hear from you, Sadie. You’re so far away now, so I didn’t know what to think. You’re my best friend and I would never do something to hurt you intentionally.”

I let out a sigh. I felt bad that she was so upset over all of it. “I know you wouldn’t. So let’s just forget about it and move on. Okay? I have so many other things we could be talking about right now.”

“Oh, really,” she sniffed, “like what?”

“I got a job.”

“Oh, where at?”

I waited a minute before I replied knowing what her reaction would be. “…a farm.”

She let out an obnoxiously loud laugh. “Are you shitting me? A farm? For real? Are you turning all southern on me already? Oh, Oh, Oh, have you met any hot cowboys?”

Moving one of my pillows to the side of the couch, I laid down and got comfortable, knowing we’d be on the phone for a while. “Yes a farm. I met this girl, Lisa, at registration, which went fine by the way, and she told me about this farm where she works. I had told her about needing to find a job around here and she made a good point that in a college town during the summer all the good jobs would be taken. So anyway, I went there the next day and checked it out.”

“What do you do? Do you have to like…milk cows and stuff?”

I laughed. “No. It’s a crop farm. I help bag green beans and corn. They do have cows though, but they aren’t there for milking.” I knew she’d know what I was talking about.

“Oh, well, that sucks.”

“Yeah. They also have horses and I have the honor of cleaning up the horse shit every day.”

This caused her to move the phone away from her ear to laugh. “Oh, my God, you aren’t serious?” I knew she’d crack up. Working on a farm is the last place she’d ever think I’d get a job, let alone, clean up horse crap.

I chuckled. “Unfortunately, yes I am, but it’s really not that bad. I actually like working there except for the heat. It’s freaking brutal. I’ll have a suntan in no time at all.”

“Any hot young guys work there?” I knew she’d go back to that one.

I rested my arm above my head and started playing with my hair. “Yes, actually, there are.”

“Ooh, you should sneak some pictures and show me,” she requested.

I laughed. “You are out of your mind. No way am I doing that.”

“You are such a spoilsport,” she laughed. “At least you have something nice to look at while you are at work.”

“Yeah, I guess,” I reckoned.

“Why do you say it like that?”

I proceeded to tell her all about Landon and his crappy rudeness. “Oh, come on Sadie, you know that saying that guys mess with the girls they like.”

I rolled my eyes. “Erin, we aren’t in middle school. This guy is a real douche, a hot douche, but a douche nonetheless.”

“Okay, well, it’s Friday. What are you doing tonight? I’m betting you haven’t been out since you moved. You should call up that girl and see if she wants to go out. She could introduce you to some guys or maybe you could meet some new people. You need to get out of the house.”

I turned and laid on my side holding the phone to my ear. “I told myself the other night that I’m not looking for a guy right now. I feel like I need a break from all of it. I don’t even think I could trust another guy again.” It was sad how much faith and trust I had put into that relationship. Like he had control over everything. I would never let that happen again.

I heard her sigh. “I know what you are saying, Sadie, but we all need a little bit of love in our life. You’re young and pretty and shouldn’t stop living your life just because of one asshole. With everything going on with Jason and now your mom and dad, you could use a little distraction.”

She was right; I did. There was no reason I should just turn off my life because I was sad and felt like crap. “There is this party going on over at the farm tonight that I was invited to. I haven’t made up my mind if I wanted to go or not.”

“You should totally go,” she shrieked. “Get out of the house and go have fun. But you have to tell me all about it tomorrow. And if there are lots of hot cowboys you have to tell me. I might come visit you a lot sooner,” she laughed loudly.

“You are such a dork,” I yawned. “All right, I’m going to let you go for now. I’m so tired. I’ll have to take a nap if I want to do anything tonight. Getting up so early is going to kick my ass this summer.”

“Yeah, good luck with that one.”

“I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“You better. Have a good night. Talk to you soon.”

“Bye.”

“Bye.” I stretched my arm out and set my phone on the coffee table contemplating if I’d really go or not. There was nothing else for me to do except sit there and watch reality TV, read, or I could bear a night hanging out with my parents. And that’s exactly what I’d been doing for the past three weeks since we moved here. I was pathetic. There was no reason for me
not
to go to the party tonight. Even if I went for just a little bit, at least it would get me out of the house.