Dreams: Part One (23 page)

“You’re not supposed to count the days when you’re on a vacation, honey.“ Colby walked up behind her and put his arms around her. He deftly removed the calendar from her fingers. “Or is something more important going on here?“

“More important?“ She was nervous, she realized. Far more nervous than she would be if she were interviewing for a new position.

“Am I about to overlook your birthday?“ He smiled wickedly and nuzzled her neck. “Don’t worry, I can come up with a terrific gift on very short notice.“

“My birthday isn’t until November.“

“That’s all right, my present can be unzipped early.“

“You’re supposed to be writing this morning.“

He nibbled her ear. “I have already written great things this morning. I could use a break. Then I promise I will go back and write some more great things.“

“Colby,“ Diana said very seriously. “Do you realize I don’t even know when
your
birthday is?“

He stopped nibbling. “September second. Is that a problem?“

“No, of course not. It’s just that it only goes to show there are a lot of things we still don’t know about each other.“

“We’re both fast learners.“ He resumed munching her earlobe.

Diana took a deep breath. It was time to make her decision. “Colby, let’s pack a lunch and go eat it on top of Chained Lady Falls.“

“You talked me into it. A man can write great things any time. I’ll make the sandwiches and pack the other essentials we always seem to need when we go to Chained Lady Falls.“ He gave her a quick, anticipatory leer and headed for the stairs that led to the bedroom.

Diana watched him go with a feeling of chagrin. She wondered if Colby even remembered the one time they had forgotten those essentials. He still hadn’t mentioned what had happened that night they spent in the cave.

What if he denied his part in the whole thing? What if he honestly did not remember making love to her without taking precautions? What if he remembered but didn’t want to believe she could have been so unlucky as to get pregnant the one and only time they had been careless?

What if he didn’t want to share the responsibility with her?

The
what ifs
had been going through her mind for days now. They had intensified after Brandon had left to return to Portland. Diana had become increasingly tense as the reality of her pregnancy had begun to establish itself.

She knew Colby had noticed her preoccupation and the anxiety she had tried so hard to quell. Once or twice he had asked her if something was wrong but he’d stopped asking after she’d denied it.

“Don’t forget we have Gil and his wife coming over for dinner tonight,“ Colby said as he came back downstairs.

“We’ll have to pick up some things in town after the picnic. I think you’ll like Gil. He’s a tough old character. Says what he thinks. Evelyn is his second wife. I don’t know her very well, but she seems nice enough…“ Colby broke off.

“You okay, honey?“

Diana nodded quickly and turned toward the kitchen. “I’m fine. Let’s get the sandwiches made.“

Forty minutes later they reached the top of the falls. Diana immediately gave Specter a handful of his favorite dog biscuits, which he promptly wolfed down. Then he went off to check out the nearby woods while Colby spread the blanket on the ground.

“If you’re going to make a habit of seducing me out here in the open, we may have to invest in an air mattress,“ he remarked as he finally settled the blanket on a patch of grass between two large boulders. “Either that, or you’ll have to promise to always be on the bottom. At forty, a man starts to notice the rocks digging into his back.“

“I’m crushed.“ Diana managed a smile as she unpacked the sandwiches. “Where’s your sense of romance?“

“Where it always is. Right inside my jeans.“ He lowered himself into a sitting position beside her and reached for a sandwich. “I take it you want to eat first?“

Her fingers clenched around her sandwich. “To tell you the truth, I’d like to talk to you first.“

“You’re going to leave dents in that sandwich if you don’t relax,“ Colby said with astonishing gentleness. He reached over and removed the sandwich from her hand. His gaze was intent and watchful. The teasing mood was gone. “So talk, lady. I’m listening.“

She looked at him for a long moment and then she looked away, staring unseeingly at the landscape below.

Unconsciously she wrapped her arms around her drawn-up knees.

“Colby, we’ve got a problem.“

“We?“

She went cold and closed her eyes. “Maybe it would be more accurate under the circumstances to say I’ve got a problem. I’m pregnant.“

“So that’s it.“ He took a large bite out of his sandwich and chewed with enthusiasm. “I was wondering why you’ve been acting as if you were walking around in a mine field.“

Diana heard the unconcerned tone in his voice and thought she would lose control and burst into tears right there in front of him. He didn’t care because he didn’t consider her pregnancy his problem.

She had made a huge mistake. She had been wrong, all wrong, to tell him. She should have kept it to herself. She should have handled her problems alone, just as she always did. In the end, a woman could only rely on herself. She’d always known that. Why had she allowed Colby Savagar to make her think there might be a few exceptions to that rule?

“It was that night in the cave, wasn’t it?“ Colby asked around a mouthful of sandwich.

“Yes. I thought you didn’t remember. You never said anything.“ Diana didn’t look at him. She could barely keep her voice steady. A sense of panic was setting in. She wanted to run, but she couldn’t seem to move. Her stomach was in a knot. Her palms were damp. She certainly couldn’t eat a single bite of her lunch now.

“I never said anything because you never mentioned it. I wasn’t sure
you
remembered. I figured you’d bring it up if you wanted to discuss the situation. We were careless that night.“

“Yes.“ At least he was noble enough to admit the fault had been mutual.

“You almost didn’t tell me about the baby,“ Colby remarked musingly as he polished off the last of his sandwich.

“You’ve been keeping all your fears and concerns to yourself, as usual. Tell me something, Diana. What made you decide to break the news today?“

“There was no point waiting any longer. I’m as sure as I can be without a test. I have to start making some decisions. Before I do that I need to know how you, uh, feel about the situation.“

“Nice of you to include me in on the decision-making process, Madam Executive.“

The edge that had appeared in his voice jolted her. Diana glanced at him nervously, unable to determine his mood.

Colby’s gaze was cool and direct. He was staring into her soul. “I’m sorry,“ she said a little helplessly.

“Yeah, so am I. Sorry it took you this long to tell me. Sorry you tried to shoulder the whole burden alone in your usual Diana-the-Amazon style. Sorry I didn’t pin you down and wring the truth out of you earlier. I knew something was wrong. I shouldn’t have let things go on this long. Ah, well. Live and learn. And I obviously still have a lot of things to learn about you, Diana.“

Anger began to burn within her. Diana was grateful for it. It drove out some of the cold chill that had been creeping through her. “I’m sorry if I didn’t handle this in exactly the way you think I should have handled it, but the fact is, I haven’t had any experience along this line. I’ve been going crazy trying to figure out what to do.“

His brows rose. “What’s so damned hard about figuring out that the first thing you should have done was tell me?“

“Damn you, Colby.“ Diana brushed her wind-tousled hair back out of her eyes and looked at him with despair and rage. “I wasn’t sure you’d want to know. We’re involved in an affair that’s only scheduled to last for the summer, remember?“

“Oh, Christ. Not that again. You’re the one who always talks about our relationship as if it was scheduled only for the summer. I’ve told you a dozen times there’s no need to put a time limit on it.“

“Colby, this may come as a shock to you, but I have to make plans. I can’t do that when everything’s open-ended and casual. I need to know a few basic facts so I can organize my life.
I
don’t know the first thing about having a
baby.“

“Lucky for you, I do.“

She stared at him. Some of the warmth began to return to her midsection. “What’s that supposed to mean?“

“Just what it sounds like.“ He fished around inside the picnic basket for another sandwich. “I’m an expert on kids, remember? You want cheese or egg salad?“

“Neither. Colby, stop fooling around with the sandwiches and tell me exactly what you mean.“

He looked at her. “Just what I said. Trust me, I know what I’m doing.“

“I
wish I did.“

“Relax, honey. We’ll take this one step at a time.“

Diana searched his face. “What’s the first step?“

“Simple. We get married.“

Diana couldn’t move for an instant. “I knew,“ she finally whispered. “Deep down inside, I knew you were different.

I knew you would never run from something like this. Thank you, Colby. Your offer means more to me than I can possibly say.“ She dashed the back of her hand across her eyes to wipe away the moisture. Then she sniffed. “But I can’t marry you.“

“The hell you can’t.“

She threw herself into his arms, her eyes damp with more unshed tears. “Don’t you understand? It wouldn’t be right. Listen to me, Colby, I’ve thought about this a lot.“

“Knowing you, honey, you’ve thought about it too much. You have a tendency to overanalyze things.“ His arms tightened roughly around her. “This is not a complicated situation, Diana. Don’t try to make it complicated.“

Her fingers clenched into the fabric of his shirt as she buried her face against his chest. “I can’t put you through the same situation you were forced into twenty years ago. You’ve made it clear that once was enough.

I won’t let history repeat itself for you. It’s not fair.
It’s just not fair.“

“My sweet stubborn little amazon,“ Colby said into her hair. “History has nothing to do with this. And neither does fairness. We’re talking about you and me. We’re going to have a baby. That means we get married.“

At sunset the last of the sun’s rays turned the waterfall first to gold and then to scarlet. Colby privately decided he’d never seen the veil of Chained Lady Falls look more like blood than it did that evening. A curious sense of lightness flowed through him.

For the first time since he had returned to Fulbrook Corners, he had the feeling that he was finally going to complete the unfinished business he sensed had brought him here.

Being an expectant father was playing tricks on his mind, he thought, amused. He had the oddest feeling that he was somehow holding both past and future in his hands, and that the link between the two was Diana.