Dr. Zinetti's Snowkissed Bride (16 page)

‘Fiona—my girlfriend…'

‘We'll get her down in a minute. You're the priority. Can you move?' Descending half a metre, Meg moved across the rock face and climbed up to the ledge that she knew was under the layers of snow. With her gloved hand she formed a snow shelf. Dino's voice came through the radio and she talked to him briefly, updating him, telling him about the bleeding. Then she carefully helped the injured climber onto the shelf. ‘OK, let's see what we're dealing with. Can you undo your trousers? They're an expensive brand—I don't really want to cut them off.'

Nick gave a weak laugh. ‘That sounds like an indecent suggestion.'

‘Nick, it's minus five.' Meg ripped open a sterile pad and then helped him slide his trousers down to expose the wound. ‘Sex isn't exactly the foremost thing on my mind right now. I—' Blood spurted into the air and she slammed the pad down hard on the wound, pressing with her hand ‘Right, that's quite a cut you've got there. You must have caught an artery.'

‘I gashed it on the rock—it spurted.'

‘Still spurting.' The pad was soaked within seconds. Meg increased the pressure.

Nick leaned his head against the rock. ‘I tried a tourniquet. Kept releasing it and tightening it but it wasn't easy. Just leave me. Get Fiona.'

‘I'm not leaving you.' Her fingers were slippery with the blood. Using her free hand, Meg spoke into her radio. Her own pulse was racing because this wasn't the place to be dealing with a major injury. She had no room to manoeuvre.
‘Dino, I'm dealing with a bleeding femoral artery.' She was going to have to apply another tourniquet, up here on a ledge in freezing conditions. What equipment did she have? What could she use? She had another rope in her backpack. Maybe she could cut that—

‘Meg.' Dino's voice came over the radio. ‘I'm sending down a sleeping bag and Celox. Use Celox to stop the bleeding. Pour it into the wound. Apply pressure for three minutes.'

‘Celox. Damn.' Meg blinked. ‘I'd forgotten about Celox.'

Nick's eyes opened. ‘What's Celox?'

‘It stops bleeding by bonding with red blood cells. It gels and produces a clot. It's amazing stuff. Originally developed for battlefield injuries, I think, but now we're using it. Had our first training session last month.' Careful with her balance, Meg took the pack that Dino lowered. Trying to remember what she'd been taught in the last training session, she ripped open the packet and tipped the Celox into the wound. Then she tore open a fresh pad and applied pressure. ‘Let's just hope it's as good as they say it is. Apparently it takes less than thirty seconds to clot. It even works in freezing temperatures, which is just as well because that's what we're dealing with here. See?' Relief poured through her as the bleeding ceased. ‘It's magic. Otherwise known as a powerful haemostatic agent. You're going to be fine, Nick. We're going to get you out of here and— Nick? Oh, no, don't do this to me—not here…'

‘It's all right, Meg, he's still breathing.' Dino spoke from right beside her and she turned with relief, realising that she hadn't even heard his descent.

‘What are you doing here? The rock is crumbling and you must have come down far too fast.' Her voice was croaky. ‘If I admit that I'm pleased to see you, are you ever going to let me forget it?'

‘Probably not.' His hands were over hers, reassuring and strong. ‘How's the bleeding?'

‘It's stopped. That stuff is like a miracle.'

‘You're the miracle,
tesoro
.' Dino took over. He checked Nick and then signalled to the winchman, who was slowly lowered with the stretcher. ‘I'm going to get some morphine into him and then we're going to get him onto the stretcher and into the helicopter. It's only a five-minute flight from here.'

The transfer to the helicopter went smoothly. Having discharged his responsibility towards Nick, Dino abseiled down to help Fiona, who was still clinging to the rock face, frozen with fear.

It took him another twenty minutes to calm her sufficiently to be able to help her down the rock face. Finally, when she was safely secured to him, Dino carefully helped her down to the valley floor. Back in the mountain rescue vehicle, they wrapped her in layers to warm her.

‘Will Nick be all right?' Her teeth chattering, Fiona huddled deeper inside the coat. ‘When he fell, I thought—I thought…'

‘He's going to be fine.' Meg cleaned herself up as discreetly as possible, sloshing water over her hands. ‘We're taking you to the hospital now, so you can check that out for yourself.'

Ellie met them as they walked into the department. Her eyes sparkled knowingly as she saw Meg and Dino together. ‘Enjoying your Sunday?' Without saying anything else, she smiled and slid her arm around Fiona, escorting her to where Nick was being assessed.

‘Not subtle, are they?' Meg gritted her teeth. ‘I should have got you to drop me off.'

Dino sent her a speculative look. ‘I don't see a reason to hide our relationship. Do you?'

Meg shrugged awkwardly. ‘Well, we're colleagues. I suppose it's just I don't want everyone knowing. I don't want them all taking bets on how long it is before you go off with some long-legged blonde.'

‘You're a long-legged blonde,
amore
.' Dino slid his arm round her waist and pulled her against him. ‘And I'm with you.'

Conscious of their surroundings, Meg tried to ignore the sizzle of awareness in her body. ‘We're at work.'

‘No, we're not. It's our day off.' His mouth was close to hers. ‘Stop thinking like that, Meg. Stop thinking this relationship is doomed before it starts.'

‘Right. Yes. I'm going to stop.' Meg tried not to think about Hayden. Instead, she found herself thinking about her replacement, the gorgeous Georgina, waiting in the car, her hair smooth and sleek and her mouth a glossy red.
Damn the woman.
‘I'm just going to nip to the staffroom and clean up. Then we can go and pick up Jamie and get your car.'

‘Come back to my house for the evening.' Dino stroked her face with his fingers. ‘I'll cook some pasta. We can open a bottle of wine.'

‘I have Jamie.'

‘He can eat my pasta. And I've bought a selection of DVDs for him.'

‘You're kidding.' Meg started to laugh. ‘You bought
Ice Age
?'

‘I bought every animated film that has been produced in the last ten years, just to be on the safe side. And a mountain of popcorn.'

‘Be careful. If you make it too comfortable, we'll move in.'

Something flickered in Dino's eyes and Meg took a step backwards, seriously shaken up by her own thought process. Why had she said that? What was she thinking? ‘I—I need to go and clean up. I'll meet you in the car park.' Without giving him time to answer, she shot into the staffroom and into the shower room.

She turned on the hot water and scrubbed her hands,
soaping them to remove all traces of the dramatic rescue. Moving in? Since when had sex turned into moving in? Get a grip, Meg. It was all too fast.

She closed her eyes tightly, trying to wipe out the picture of the three of them curled up on one of Dino's huge, deep sofas, watching a movie.

He liked her, yes. And he liked Jamie. Otherwise why would he have bought an entire collection of movies he was never likely to watch on his own? And he genuinely seemed to find her attractive, even when she was dressed in her walking gear.

So why was she just waiting for it to fall apart?

Reminding herself that Dino wasn't anything like Hayden, Meg dried her hands and opened the door of the shower room. A couple of nurses from the department were making tea and Melissa, the nurse from the observation unit, was in the middle of telling a story about some unfortunate girl whose trousers had split.

‘It would help if she ate less chocolate,' she said bitchily, and then broke off as Meg appeared. ‘Oh—hi, Meg. Gosh, what have you been doing with your Sunday? You look a total wreck.'

A total wreck.

Angry, Meg pushed her hair away from her face. ‘I rescued a man from certain death from a cliff face,' she said coldly. ‘What have you been doing with your Sunday, Melissa? Painting your nails?'

Flirting with doctors?

‘Apart from working, I've been planning what to wear for Dino Zinetti's Christmas party.' Melissa made herself a herbal tea and declined the offer of a biscuit from one of the other nurses. ‘No, thanks. My dress is so-o-o tight there's barely room for me, certainly no room for a biscuit. I want to look like a woman, but not that much of a woman.'

Meg felt sick. Dino had invited Melissa to his party? A few friends, he'd said. Friends from work and members of the mountain rescue team. Since when had Melissa been a friend? He knew it was seeing Melissa that had upset her on the night of the ball.

Nina, one of the other nurses, helped herself to two biscuits. ‘So what are you wearing, Meg?'

Meg looked at her blankly. What was she wearing? What sort of a question was that? The party was two days away. Who started thinking about what to wear two days before an event? Dino had told her it was informal. She'd planned to tug open her wardrobe half an hour before she left the house and pick something.

‘Meg will wear jeans.' Melissa fished her tea bag out of her mug. ‘Meg always wears jeans. And I don't blame you.' She smiled at Meg. ‘Jeans are always safe, aren't they? And your legs are quite muscular.'

Muscular?

Meg had an overwhelming temptation to kick one of her muscular legs straight into Melissa's glossy smile.

She wanted to say something witty that would wipe the smirk off the other girl's face, but her mind was completely blank. No words came. Later, she knew, she'd think of something cutting. Later, when it was far too late to say anything, and then she'd spend weeks cursing herself for not thinking of the right thing to say at the right time. But for now there was nothing. So she simply muttered something non-specific and left the room, hating herself for letting them get to her.

Meg will wear jeans. Meg always wears jeans.

What was wrong with that?

What was so clever about pouring yourself into a tight dress that left nothing to the imagination? Any idiot could plaster themselves with make-up and pout, couldn't they?

Angry and hurt, she stomped towards the back entrance
of the department. She'd actually been looking forward to Dino's party, but now she didn't want to go. It was going to be another one of those social events that felt like a competition.
I love your shoes. Oh, that dress is so gorgeous.
A room full of gorgeous Georginas all staring at her and judging.

Meg always wears jeans.

Maybe she'd just tell Dino she wasn't well. But then Jamie would be horribly disappointed and she'd earn herself another lecture from her mother.

Pushing open the doors of the emergency department, Meg paused as the cold air rushed forward to meet her. In the distance she saw the jagged outline of the mountains, topped with snow and sparkling under the winter sun. Just looking at them made her feel instantly better.

Really, she had to get over this. It was just a party. One party. Not a big deal. Nothing worth getting herself into a stew over. She was being pathetic.

Meg breathed in the fresh mountain air and suddenly felt stronger.

Two girls dressed as elves hobbled past her into the building, chatting together. A mother with a pushchair loaded with Christmas shopping negotiated the icy pavement on her way home. Life, Meg thought. A mixture of good and bad. Easy and difficult.

The door swung closed behind her and she saw Dino waiting for her, the collar of his jacket turned up against the cold, his phone in his hand as he scrolled through his messages.

She could ask him why he'd invited Melissa. She could tell him she wasn't coming. Or she could play this another way.

Meg gave a slow smile.

And have some fun.

D
INO
checked on the caterers and adjusted the volume of the music. People had been arriving for the past hour but there was still no sign of Meg and Jamie.

A tinkle of female laughter scraped against his nerve endings and he clenched his jaw and glanced over his shoulder at Melissa. She stood with her back to the fire, the shimmering light turning her skin-tight black dress transparent. He wondered if she knew her underwear was on display and decided that she did. Melissa did nothing by accident. He knew her type well. Her dress was a message.
I'm yours.

Except that he didn't want her.

He hadn't invited her, but she'd arrived as part of the group of nurses from the emergency department. Given that the purpose of the party was goodwill, he'd decided to overlook it. But now he was remembering that Melissa had been the reason Meg had run out on him the night of the ball. Had she found out that Melissa intended to show up? Was that why she wasn't here?

If she didn't know, she was going to find out soon enough. And she was going to take one look at Melissa's ultra-short dress and shiny red mouth and turn and run. Again.

Dino felt tension ripple across his shoulders. He'd told her it was casual, hadn't he? He'd set this whole thing up as somewhere comfortable and safe where she could socialise
without worrying about what everyone was wearing. He hadn't factored in that it was Christmas and most of the women were looking for an excuse to dress up and flutter their feathers.

Meg was going to arrive in her jeans and feel out of place.

He wondered whether he should call her mobile and warn her. But if he did that, she would definitely freak out and not show.

‘Hi, Dino, great party.' One of the consultant radiologists shook his hand firmly and introduced his wife, who was heavily pregnant. ‘This is a fantastic place you have here.'

Looking at the throng of people filling his house, Dino gave a humourless smile. Interesting, he thought, how a house could be full of people and yet still feel empty just because of the absence of one person.

Extracting himself from small talk, Dino glanced through the expanse of glass, watching for headlights. People were arriving in a continuous stream, but there was still no sign of Meg.

He was just exchanging a few words with an equipment officer from the mountain rescue team when the room suddenly fell silent. The steady buzz of conversation faded to near silence. Exploring the cause, Dino turned his head and saw Meg standing in the doorway. She was wearing a sparkling blue dress that made Melissa's choice of semi-transparent black look positively dowdy.

Scanning her from the tumble of golden curls to the long, graceful length of her legs, Dino tried to remember how to breathe. What had possessed him to invite all these people when there was only one person who interested him? Why hadn't he just invited her and made it a private party for two? She looked stunning.

And sophisticated.

A pair of killer heels made her legs look impossibly long
and the shimmering dress skimmed her athletic physique in a way that suggested rather than shrieked.

‘Dino!' Jamie flew across the room, dressed as a superhero, his cape flying behind him. ‘Sorry we're late. We were on a mission.'

Dino scooped the boy into his arms, his eyes still on Meg. For a moment she didn't move. She just looked at him. Then she smiled and walked across the room, head held high.

‘Dino.'

He'd expected to see insecurity in her eyes but instead he saw fire and fight and felt the tension pulsing from her. Picking up on it, his eyes narrowed in silent question.

Something, or someone, had upset her and she'd come out fighting.

And you didn't have to be a genius to guess who. ‘I was beginning to think you weren't coming.'

‘Why wouldn't I come?' Her tone was slightly brittle and she helped herself to a glass of orange juice from one of the waiters who were circulating with drinks and canapés. ‘This is fantastic. I thought you said it would be just a few friends. Informal.'

‘It started out that way but it escalated, and I don't have time to prepare food for this number of people so I thought it was easier to get caterers in. This isn't how I planned it.'

She relaxed slightly and stayed by his side. They chatted about the day and then a couple of members of the mountain rescue team joined them and they all started talking about their latest rescue.

Halfway through the evening ‘Santa' appeared with a sack of presents for the children.

As Jamie and the other children leaped around with excitement, Dino watched Meg. Finally she'd relaxed. Drink in hand, she was laughing as Jamie ripped the paper off his present to reveal a large plastic Batman figure.

Dino threw a questioning glance at Meg. ‘I know he already has one…'

‘It's great. Really thoughtful.' She smiled up at him. ‘You can never have too many. I'm trying to work out who is concealed under that Santa suit. It looks like Rob Hamilton from Orthopaedics but he isn't quite that portly. Unless he's hit the mince pies big time.'

‘We added some padding to his costume. He has the deepest voice. Not to mention the fact he was one of the few who was prepared to do it. Come on—' He held out his hand. ‘Let's dance.'

She hesitated, her cheeks pink. Then she slowly put her glass down on the table and gave a hesitant smile. ‘All right, but I ought to warn you I—'

‘Dino!' Melissa bounced over to them, her breasts in danger of making a guest appearance. Grabbing his other hand, she pulled. ‘This is my favourite track. Dance with me.'

‘I don't think so.' Frowning, Dino extracted his hand but Meg was already backing away, her smile frozen to her face.

‘You go ahead. I'm useless at dancing anyway. And I need to see Jamie.'

‘Meg—'

‘Honestly, dance.' She waved her hand towards the centre of the room. ‘I'll catch up with you later.'

Dino reached out to grab her but she melted into the crowd, vanishing in the sea of shimmering dresses that closed in front of him, blocking his path.

 

She was a complete fool.

Meg stood in the bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror. It was always going to be like this. What had she expected? That she could turn herself into some supermodel overnight?
That putting on a pair of high heels and a sparkling dress would make her feel any different inside?

‘Meg?' Dino's voice came through the door. ‘Are you in there?'

She froze. ‘Give me a minute.'

‘I need to talk to you.'

Tugging open the bathroom door, she pinned a smile on her face. ‘Hi. Everything all right? The kids haven't discovered the champagne, have they?'

‘Why do you do that? You just walked away.' His eyes were very dark and very angry. ‘You always walk away when things get tough. You should have stood your ground and fought her.'

‘I didn't want to make things awkward for you.'

‘Awkward? You think I care about awkward?
Maledezione
, Meg, what do you think is going on here?'

‘I think all the women in the room are interested in you—as usual. I think they all spent most of the last week planning what they were going to wear to catch your attention.'

‘There is only one woman in the room who interests me. And, no, you're not leaving until we've had this out.' He rested his arm against the wall, trapping her, his eyes stormy. ‘If you'd hung around you would have heard me telling Melissa that I'm not interested. That she's wasting her time.'

‘It isn't just Melissa.' Meg found that her hands were shaking. ‘There will always be another Melissa. That's the sort of man you are.'

His features hardened. ‘What's that supposed to mean?'

‘You can't help it, Dino. You're super good looking, sexy, rich—basically gorgeous. You only have to smile and women want to rip their clothes off.' Meg gave a hysterical laugh. ‘There will always be some woman who wants you. Always some woman trying to knock me down to get to you. Maybe you don't notice Melissa, but sooner or later one of them is
going to attract your attention if they try hard enough. And then it's going to be Georgina all over again.'

There was a long silence. ‘That was her name?' His voice was harsh. ‘The woman he dumped you for?'

Meg shrugged. ‘That doesn't matter. What does matter is that the world is full of Georginas. I can't compete. And, actually, I don't want to. I don't want to live my life on a knife edge, wondering whether this is going to be the day you find someone prettier.'

‘Have you any idea how insulting that is?' He pulled away from her, his expression black. ‘You're implying that I have no control over my own emotions or behaviour, that I'll tangle the sheets with every pretty girl who crosses my path. Is that what you think of me? Is that who you think I am?'

‘You're human. You're a man, for God's sake.'

‘Yes, I'm a man. A grown man, not some teenage boy who hasn't learned control. Damn it, Meg, I can forgive you for thinking I'm ruled by my libido because that's how it seems whenever I'm with you, but I find it hard to forgive you for thinking I'm so shallow that I'd chase after any woman who throws herself at me. I need more than mindless sex in a relationship. Until you came into my life, I had no trouble at all with the word no. Believe it or not, I'm adult enough to make my own choices. And if a woman comes on to me, it's still my choice, even if her dress is up round her bottom and her boobs are thrust in my face. For your information, Melissa is the type of woman I avoid. I know her type too well.'

‘But—'

‘No, there are no “buts” on this one Meg.' His tone was hard. ‘Maybe you've spent too much time alone with Jamie. You're treating me like a child, assuming that every shiny new toy I see in the store I'm going to want to buy.'

Her heart pounded. ‘I'm not treating you like a child.'

‘Then trust me, Meg. Trust me to make my own decisions
and exercise control. That's what being an adult is all about. I know what I want out of life. And it isn't quick sex with any woman who will put it out there.' A muscle worked in his jaw. ‘I wait until I see something good, something special, and when I do I'm not afraid to go for it. Unlike you.'

‘I'm not afraid.'

‘Yes, you are. You're terrified of being hurt again the way Hayden hurt you, and I understand that. But we can't have a proper relationship if I'm having to look over my shoulder all the time, checking there are no pretty girls in the vicinity in case you're about to go into meltdown. I can't live like that. There has to be trust, Meg.'

He didn't understand. He had absolutely no idea. Meg felt tears prick her eyes. ‘I can't live like that either. I can't live my life wondering whether today is going to be the day you tell me I'm not the woman you want to be with. Wondering whether this is going to be the day you walk out and go off with the more glamorous model waiting in the wings. I sometimes wonder if you even realise how sexy you are. You walk into a room and there isn't a woman who doesn't look at you! And I don't think I can stand by and watch a never-ending string of glamorous woman dress up and try and attract you away from me. And maybe that's defeatist, but it's the way it is. I don't want to live my life with a knot of anxiety in my stomach. It isn't fair on me and it isn't fair on Jamie. And it isn't fair on you because I don't think I can change. And I know this is just me being stupid. I know that. But I can't change the way I think.' Her breathing was shallow.

‘You're right that I'm afraid. I admit it, I'm terrified! Terrified that I'll put Jamie through what I went through. Terrified that I'll have to answer another load of questions about why another man left him. I just don't want to risk that. I can't.' She waited for him to give a sympathetic nod or
acknowledge in some way that he understood what she was feeling.

Instead, he pulled away from her, his eyes cold. ‘If you think I'd hurt your son, you don't know me at all.'

‘It isn't about not knowing you. It's about reality.' She struggled to make him understand. ‘Relationships break up every single day.'

‘Not all of them. Have you thought about that, Meg? Some relationships actually work out. The good ones.'

‘But how do you know?' Her voice was a whisper. ‘If I get this wrong, Jamie gets hurt. I can't do that to him.' And she couldn't do it to herself.

‘So you'll trust me with your life on the end of a rope, but you won't trust me with your heart.' His tone was raw. ‘Is that right?'

Meg stared at him.

She wanted to tell him that she trusted him. But the words couldn't break free from the cold ball of terror inside her.

Dino watched her for a long moment. Waited. And then turned and walked away, leaving her standing alone, drowning in a sea of her own fears.

 

Meg drove home, Jamie asleep in the back of the car.

Twice she had to stop because she was crying so hard and she couldn't see the road. She'd blown it. She'd totally blown it. Ruined everything.

As she drove through the town on the way to her house, she saw crowds of people pouring out of restaurants and bars after Christmas parties. They wore silly hats and tinsel and clutched presents. They were all laughing and chatting and they seemed so
normal
. Whereas she—she was so messed up she didn't have a clue how to fix herself.

Why couldn't she just have said she trusted him? Even if it all went wrong, could it honestly feel any worse than this?

She could have carried on, couldn't she, hoping that he kept looking at her and no one else?

But she was exhausted with being on her guard and watching for competition. Wiping the smile off Melissa's face should have been fun, but she'd felt nothing except a bone-deep tiredness.