Dr. Campbell's Secret Son (18 page)

‘Would you like some coffee before bed?’ he said instead.

‘Not coffee. I’ve had too much as it is. But a hot chocolate would be lovely.’

By the time Jamie returned with the hot drink Sarah had fallen asleep on the sofa, her long legs curled up and tucked under her. Just as well, Jamie thought as he fetched a blanket from the spare room to put over her. He didn’t know if he really did have the strength to resist her.

When Sarah woke up the next morning she felt a little disoriented. The last she remembered was sitting in front of the fire while she waited for Jamie to bring her the hot chocolate she had requested. But here she was in her own bed. Her cheeks flamed as she realised that Jamie must have carried her. She hadn’t been wearing anything under her bathrobe and now she was completely naked under the covers.

She followed the smell of coffee into the kitchen, where Jamie was feeding a laughing Calum his breakfast. He was only wearing a pair of jeans low on his hips and his muscular chest was bare. His hair was still damp from his shower and he smelt of soap and shaving cream. He had nicked himself while shaving and she suppressed the impulse to reach out and touch his face. She averted her eyes hoping that by doing so she could banish the effect his half-naked body was having on her.

‘After yesterday I thought it would be a good idea to have my shower before this little fellow woke up. Unfortunately I didn’t have time to finish getting dressed when I heard him stirring.’

‘Good grief. What time is it?’ She glanced at her watch and was horrified to find it was almost nine. ‘I should have been at work half an hour ago. Why didn’t you wake me?’ she accused Jamie, stopping just long enough to grab the coffee-cup out of his hand and to plant several kisses on Calum’s upturned face, before heading back to the bedroom.

‘Hey, no need to rush,’ Jamie called after her. ‘You needed to sleep. I phoned the department an hour ago, and everything’s under control. You can take your time.’

Sarah didn’t know whether to be grateful to Jamie or furious with him. He had to realise that he couldn’t make decisions for her. Even though he was trying to help, it wasn’t up to him to decide when she should go into work. But, she admitted to herself, perhaps the real reason for her feelings of discomfort was caused by having Jamie in such close proximity. She was glad he was spending time with Calum, but having him so near, sharing the flat, was doing her own resolve to keep him at a distance no good at all. Thank goodness her mother was returning that evening and Jamie would be going back to his own place. She didn’t know if she could keep her hormones under control for very much longer.

When Sarah arrived back that evening she found a completely different scenario to the one of the day before. The flat was spotless and Calum was dressed in his nightwear. The fire had been lit and delicious smells of a lamb curry were floating from the kitchen. Jamie was stirring a pot as he balanced Calum in his spare arm. Both males were looking into the pot with great interest. Calum was babbling away as if discussing the ingredients with his father.

What on earth happened here? Sarah thought immediately suspicious, shrugging off her coat. Had her mother returned early and been drafted in to help? That would be cheating. Jamie had to learn to cope on his own.

‘Is my mother back?’ she asked.

‘Jean? Yes, she returned a short while ago. Popped in to say hello and that she’ll come to see you later,’ Jamie replied, handing Calum over to Sarah. ‘Here, you take Calum while I take your coat and fix you a drink. You
are
finished for the evening?’

‘Yes, Dr Holden has taken over. A small white wine would be lovely. If there is any?’

‘There’s white and red actually.’

‘Have you been shopping as well as all this?’ Sarah couldn’t believe what she was seeing. ‘Has my mother been helping?’

‘Of course not.’ Jamie hesitated for a moment. ‘Actually, I phoned up an agency and arranged for someone to come over for a couple of hours to do some housework and shopping,’ he admitted. ‘Cost me an arm and a leg, what with it being Sunday and short notice, but I just don’t see how it would have been possible otherwise.’

Sarah had to laugh. ‘I do think that’s cheating, Jamie, but what the heck—it’s your money.’

‘I’m sure I’ll get better with practice,’ he said, handing her a chilled glass of Chablis, ‘but at the moment I’ll take all the help I can get. Your mother did suggest she take Calum over to her for the night. She says she’s missed him and would really like some time with him on her own. Do you mind?’

Sarah didn’t know if she minded or not. On the one hand she hadn’t seen her son for the best part of the day, on the other an occasional night off wouldn’t do either of them any harm.

‘Is she coming for supper?’ Sarah asked. ‘What is it anyway? Did you cook that yourself or has it been sent over from a deli that does outside catering?’

‘I’m not completely hopeless!’ Jamie protested. ‘I was hoping that this needn’t be for tonight, but could go in the freezer for another time. Actually, I have also taken the liberty of booking us a table at a restaurant in town.’ He named a place that Sarah had heard about and had been dying to try. ‘Unless you’re too tired to go out?’

Making her mind up, Sarah smiled up at Jamie. ‘I’d love to go out for something to eat.’ She didn’t tell him that she didn’t know whether she could trust herself alone with him in the flat. Not without the limiting presence of Calum. Besides since the night of the wedding she hadn’t left the house, apart from trips to the supermarket and the hospital. A change of scenery was needed, and time with Jamie on neutral ground would be safest.

Sarah’s mother arrived a little later and, after bringing Sarah up to date with the news of her weekend, took a sleepy Calum back with her to her flat.

Jamie returned to his hospital digs to have a shave and change, while Sarah had a quick shower and applied some make-up. She knew the restaurant was quite formal and had slipped on a simple black knee-length dress that she thought would be sufficiently formal without going overboard. She twisted her hair into a French plait that emphasised the fine features of her face, and added her favourite green earrings and high heels. When the doorbell rang, signalling Jamie’s return, she opened the door to his admiring wolf whistle.

Sarah resisted the impulse to wolf whistle back. He looked jaw-droppingly gorgeous, she thought. He was wearing a dark, well-tailored suit, which emphasised his lean frame, with a shirt in the palest pink and a navy tie. He looked incredibly handsome and suave. Sarah felt her heart turn over.

‘You look amazing,’ he said softly, his eyes gleaming. ‘Are you sure you still want to go out?’

Sarah chose to ignore the meaning in his words and the look in his eyes. ‘Let’s go,’ she said quickly.

Jamie opened the door of his sports car and Sarah sank into the soft leather seats. The car smelt of the leather and the faint tang of aftershave. Like Jamie, it was very masculine.

Jamie drove quickly and expertly and it was barely twenty minutes before they were being seated by the maître d’. Sarah took in the plush surroundings. The floor-to-ceiling windows looked over the city, its lights a diamanté bracelet of twinkling colour. The tables were laid with crisp white tablecloths and silver knives and forks. Candles cast a soft light. The restaurant was filled to capacity and the soft murmur of the other diners filled the air. Delicious smells drifted in from the kitchen. Suddenly Sarah was starving.

Jamie was an attentive and amusing dinner companion. They kept to neutral subjects, mainly about the work they shared. Jamie spoke about his work in Africa and as he spoke about the hospital, telling Sarah about the types of cases they dealt with, how children still died from malnutrition and mothers in childbirth, Sarah began to appreciate the depth of his passion for his work. He told her about Sibongele, the orphan who’d had been in the children’s ward for several months. He spoke again of how the boy had developed a strong attachment to him.

‘And I’ve grown fond of him, too. He’s very bright and the mission school has offered him a scholarship. One day, with luck and hard work, he’ll be working at the hospital as a doctor. All he needs right now is a little stability in his life.’

‘You miss it all, don’t you?’ said Sarah

‘Yes.’ For a moment there was a far-away look in Jamie’s eyes. ‘It’s such a beautiful country—and the people. They really appreciate the smallest thing you can do for them. It’s just frustrating not to be able to do more.’

‘You must be keen to get back,’ Sarah prompted

‘Yes, I am, although I’ll miss you and Calum. Still, it won’t be for ever. Anyway, let’s talk about something more cheerful.’

The rest of the evening passed quickly. Jamie told her more about the places he had visited in Africa and some stories that had her laughing out loud. She couldn’t remember the last time she had enjoyed herself so much. She was so busy listening to Jamie she was unaware of the waiter topping up her glass. It wasn’t until they stood up that she realised the wine she had drunk had made her head swim. It had been so long since she had drunk more than a glass of wine that the extra glass or two was having the strangest effect on her. Jamie, on the other hand, had kept to mineral water as he was driving.

She was still feeling a little light-headed by the time they pulled up outside her flat. She chose to believe it was the extra alcohol that was giving her the warm glow rather than Jamie’s company.

‘Would you like to come up for a coffee?’ she asked Jamie, not wanting the evening to come to an end just yet.

Jamie looked at her speculatively. ‘Just for a moment. Just to make sure you get in OK.’

Sarah felt herself bristle. He was doing it again. Treating her as if she were some helpless female who needed looking after.

‘I am perfectly able to see myself in,’ she replied tartly

‘Nevertheless, I’ll come up for a moment.’ As Sarah eased herself out of the low-slung sports car, she stumbled slightly in her high heels.

‘Bloody shoes.’ She grimaced, hoping she hadn’t twisted her ankle.

‘Come on.’ Jamie laughed, getting out of the car and going to her side. ‘I could always carry you up the stairs.’

‘You put a hand on me, Jamie Campbell, and I’ll…’

But before she could finish her threat, Jamie was advancing towards her, a wicked glint in his eyes. ‘You know I never could resist a challenge,’ he said, picking her up and throwing her over his shoulder in a fireman’s lift. Ignoring Sarah’s beating fists, he carried her up the short flight of steps to the front door. He took the key that Sarah had given him in case of emergencies from his pocket and opened the door. Still ignoring her cries and threats, he deposited her gently on the sofa.

Sarah looked at him, eyes blazing, ‘You, you Neanderthal, you!’ she spat finally.

‘I was only trying to help a damsel in distress!’ Jamie replied, grinning broadly.

‘I’m more distressed now! You could have picked me up in a more elegant fashion!’ Sarah retorted, before seeing the funny side and beginning to laugh. ‘Not exactly a bride being carried over the threshold, was it?’ As soon as the words were out, she could have bitten her tongue.

‘I mean,’ she added hastily ‘not really romantic.’ Oh, dear, she thought, this was going from bad to worse.

‘If it’s romance you want…’ Jamie said, pulling her up gently by her arms before finding her lips. He held her in his arms while he dropped kisses light as raindrops on her hair. Sarah took a deep breath. She knew she should pull away, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to remove herself from the comfort of his arms. Just a few more minutes, she thought. He’s going to be away for a while.

Jamie groaned before finding her mouth. His kisses sent sparks of desire through her body. She knew if she didn’t stop him soon, she would never be able to stop. And this wasn’t what she needed.

With an almost unbearable effort she pulled herself out of his embrace and stepped back. She couldn’t think coherently when she was in his arms. She needed space.

‘No, Jamie,’ she said, her voice tinged with regret. ‘I am not going to sleep with you again—however much I want to,’ she admitted. ‘Good sex—OK, fantastic sex,’ she conceded when he cocked his eyebrow at her, ‘just isn’t enough for me.’

Jamie dropped his hands to his sides. He looked at her, his brown eyes serious.

‘Do you think that’s all I want from you? Sex? Good God, woman, don’t you know me better than that?’

‘What is it you want from me, Jamie?’

‘I want to be with you. Share your life. Go to sleep with you. Wake up in the morning with you. I want us to bring up our son together. Don’t you know that I love you?’ The last words were ground out as if ripped from his body. ‘I never thought I’d ever say that to a woman. But I’m saying it now.’

For a long moment Sarah let his words sing through her body. How long had she waited to hear him say those words? But now it was too late. She still couldn’t bring herself to trust him. He wanted Calum. There was no doubt in her mind about that. But she couldn’t shake the thought that he would tell her he loved her, marry her even, do and say anything to achieve his own ends—to have Calum in Africa with him. She didn’t doubt that he found her attractive, wanted her sexually, enough to marry her and have her with him, but lust and a need to be with his son wasn’t enough for her.

‘I wish I could believe you, Jamie,’ she said sadly. ‘But you’ve hurt me too much. I just can’t trust you to be honest with me. You left me once. I couldn’t bear for that to happen again.’

‘God dammit, SJ. I’ve promised to come back. What else can I do to prove that I love you?’

‘You’re still leaving me now.’

‘But only for a short while. You know I have to go back right now. But I’ve told you I am prepared to give it all up for you and Calum as soon as I have honoured my responsibilities. Isn’t that enough?’

‘And how will I know that you won’t eventually resent me for that? That eventually you’ll feel trapped. Come to hate me. And leave again. It’s not just me. I have to think about my son.’