Down the Hidden Path (23 page)

“Gray! Gray, wake up!”

She shook the sleep from her as the panic in David’s voice settled in. He’d pushed her bedroom door open with such force, it slammed against the wall. The noise helped rouse her. She sprung from the bed, trying to assimilate her surroundings. “David, what’s wrong?”

“I—I can’t find Jeremiah.”

Her eyes leveled on the clock by her bed, but the numbers were blurry. Finally, she saw it was seven in the morning.

“Daylight. He wanted to leave at daylight. But he didn’t wake me up.” He stood in her doorway, fishing clothes already on and she realized he must have slept in them.

She grabbed her robe, a sinking feeling souring her stomach.

Downstairs, they found no sign of the McKinley men. The house was deathly quiet and empty. David turned to her, such a sad, confused look on his face, it broke her heart.

“Did he have to go to the bait store this morning?” David asked. Hope, so much hope in his tone.

She pulled a breath. No. He didn’t. He’d been to the bait store the day before. She moved away from David so she could look into the backyard where the dock had anchored the boat last night. She said silent prayers as she moved in an effort to unblock the view. But when she stopped at the window, it confirmed every fear she had.

The boat was gone.

David stepped beside her, searching the east end of the lake, then the west. His breath made an oblong fog mark on the window. It was a long time before he spoke. “They went without me?”

Her heart shattered. How could Miah have done this?

Innocent, golden eyes looked to hers for answers. “Jeremiah went without me?”

She opened her mouth, but had no words.

David dropped his head and mumbled, “I’ve been practicing with Stacey. I wanted to surprise him.”

A dart of pain settled in Gray’s chest. She shook her head. “I don’t know what happened, David. I don’t think he would do that, intentionally leave you behind.”

Stiffness entered his muscles. “But he did.”

David tried to turn and walk away, but Gray wouldn’t let him. Gripping his shoulders, she drew him in. And for a good half hour, she held him while he cried.

CHAPTER 13

Six hours after they’d left, the McKinley men returned. Gray knew the moment the boat pulled in. She steeled herself for whatever excuse Miah could hope to give about leaving his son behind. She’d tried to call his cell phone as soon as she realized they were gone. It rang inside the house and that’s when she knew she’d have to wait until he returned to get an explanation.

The others were still outside when Miah came in the house calling Gray and David’s names. She waited in the kitchen at the sink. “Hey, where’s David? I want to show him what we caught.”

She spun, gripping the butcher knife in her hand more tightly. “Why didn’t you take your cell phone?”

But his focus was on the weapon. “Whoa.” He raised his hands in surrender. “No reception on the lake. Uh, everything okay?”

“Is it okay?” No. Nothing was okay and she’d been fooling herself to think it would be. Miah was Miah and all through high school, he’d picked other girls over her. Now, he was picking his brothers over his son and though she knew he likely had some reason for leaving David out, the fact remained that David’s heart was broken. “You tell me. I spent the morning consoling a twelve-year-old.”

Concern for David caused him to step forward. “Why? What happened to him?”

As he moved closer, she realized she’d been holding the knife like a weapon. She discarded it on the counter. “You, Jeremiah. You’re what happened to him.” She so knew that feeling. The feeling of being overlooked. She didn’t want to bring it up, didn’t even want to admit it still cut her heart like a dull blade, but it did. All these years later, it did.

He shook his head to clear it. “I don’t know what’s going on.”

She pointed at the back door. “You didn’t take him. Had you planned on him staying home alone all day?”

“Well, yeah. When you said you weren’t staying the night, I thought it must be fine for him to be alone for a few hours. Is that what this is about?”

She leaned forward. “You went without him, Miah. You ditched him for your brothers. He was heartbroken.”

She watched the realization rise like a morning sun on Miah’s face. “David wanted to go fishing? That can’t be right. He never wants to go. I’ve asked him a dozen times. He
hates
fishing.”

“Well, right now he hates you more, so congratulations.” She cocked her hip and crossed her arms. She knew she was being hard on him, too hard, probably, but it hurt so deeply to be shoved aside like yesterday’s trash. All David wanted was for his dad to be proud of him. All she’d ever wanted was Miah’s attention. And when she finally got it, finally believed she was able to have him, he’d kissed her on the top of the head and said their night together was a great send-off. “I should have known this would happen sooner or later.”

“Because you’re always so ready for me to fail. Look, I didn’t think he’d want to go.”

She took a step toward him. “Well, he did. And even if he hadn’t wanted to fish, Miah, this was your bonding guy time and you completely alienated him. You treated him like an outsider, like he didn’t belong. He’s your son.”

All of it, all the feelings David must have experienced were running like wild horses through Miah’s mind and she could see the horror. He hadn’t meant for it to happen like this; of course he hadn’t. But it still had. They’d worked so hard to build a firm foundation for Miah to crush it all due to carelessness. He gripped her arms. “I have to fix this. Where is he?”

“He’s upstairs. But I don’t think he’s going to be very excited about talking to you. He’s embarrassed now.”

“I have to try.” Miah ran a hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, Gray. The parenting thing is still new. Please don’t give up on me.” He walked through the doorway that would lead him past the living room and up the stairs.

She stopped him halfway there. “Miah, you know how you’ve been wondering what he and Stacey were doing all the time?”

“Yeah?”

“She was teaching him how to fish.”

His face crumbled into a deep frown, lines around his mouth tilting down. It was so painful to look at, Gray focused on the wall beside him as he turned and rushed up the stairs.
Don’t give up on me
, he’d requested. She didn’t want to. But trusting him proved dangerous, for both her and David. And Gray had spent so many years alone, it seemed best to back away and not mess up her perfect record.

He found David on his bed, lying on his stomach reading a book. “Can I come in?”

David angled to look at him, but his face was stoic, the only signs of his hurt the red rims around his eyes. “If you want.”

The bed sank as Miah perched himself on the edge of it. “I really screwed up today.”

“No big deal.” Too disconnected. Too detached.

He started to put a hand on David’s shoulder, but opted not to. It hovered there until Miah finally dropped it back to his side. “It’s a really big deal to me, David. I should have asked if you wanted to go.”

“You didn’t want me to go. Like I said, it’s no big deal.”

Miah’s chest tightened. “No, that wasn’t it. I didn’t think you’d want to and I didn’t want you to feel like you had to.”

“Had to what? Spend the day with my dad on a boat? Yeah, every kid hates that.” There was sarcasm in his tone, just enough to almost mask the pain. Beside his bed, a stuffed Ninja Turtle sat at the ready, bo staff in his hands.

“I’m sorry. I should have asked you.”

David whirled on him and threw the book at the wall. “No. You should have told me to go. You’re my
dad
, right? Aren’t we supposed to do things like go fishing together? Or is that only when your brothers aren’t around? Is that when I’m important to you?”

“You’re the most important thing to me in the whole world.” Miah had to fist his hands to keep from grabbing him and holding him. And though that might make him feel better, he knew it wouldn’t help David yet.

David started to get up, but Miah caught him. Hands clamped on his arms, he pleaded. “David, listen to me. I thought you hated fishing. I didn’t know. I was trying to . . . I don’t know, I was trying to handle the situation the way I thought Bill and Angela would.”

The tiniest spark of understanding flickered in David’s eyes and Miah took it as a sign to plunge forward. “I feel so bad for not being everything you need.”

David frowned. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’m a pretty simple kind of guy, David. I wouldn’t know a museum from an art gallery. I wouldn’t have a clue how to act at the symphony and I don’t own a suit. Your parents gave you so many things I can never give you. I’ve felt like I’ve been pushing you to be something you’re not.”

David chewed the inside of his cheek.

“And the fishing . . . you didn’t like it the time I took you.”

Anger settled back over his features. “Just because I wasn’t good at it doesn’t mean I don’t want to try.”

If there were any remaining pieces of Miah’s heart that weren’t shattered, those words completed the task. Miah nodded, kneaded his son’s shoulders. “I know. I know that now.”

David picked at his fingernail, head down. “I like the stuff we do here.” It was an olive branch, and Miah gladly took it.

“Can we go fishing?” Miah said, his throat tight.

David frowned. “When?”

Miah shrugged. “Right now.”

“But you just got back.”

Miah stood. “So? Come on, there’s still gas in the boat and plenty of daylight left.”

David stood up, too, slowly, testing the idea. “Will your brothers want to go again?”

Miah winked. “They’re not invited. Come on.” He pulled a heavy jacket from the closet and helped David shrug into it. Within a few minutes, they were downstairs and headed for the back door.

Caleb stopped them. “What are you doing? We’ve got fish to clean.”

Miah pulled from the grip Caleb had on him. “Clean ’em. David and I are taking the boat back out.” The warning look he gave Caleb stalled the conversation.

“Okay. Leave us all the work.”

“We’ll be back in a couple hours.” As he left the house, his gaze landed on Gray. She didn’t look angry. But she also didn’t look happy. Distant. With her head tipped back and her stance squared. David had forgiven him, but he had to wonder if Gray would be able to. David was the only thing that mattered to her. Miah’d made a monumental mistake in assuming David wouldn’t want to go. How many more mistakes could he make before Gray shut him out? She could do that. She had once before. Completely shut him out of her life. He couldn’t blame her for being skittish, but he wouldn’t let her run away. Not ever again.

Gray kept a cool distance from Jeremiah for the next few days. Caleb refused to do his therapy while his brothers were there, so Gray had been scarce around the house, only stopping by to help David with homework or to drop him off after school. Miah was giving her free rein with David—that’s how it needed to be. She was amazing with him, and, without her, Miah would be utterly lost. He wouldn’t make another stupid mistake like the fishing again. Watching Gray with David was so rewarding, he’d begun to really understand the depths and levels of a parent’s love. Her love. Back when he’d learned he had a son, his intention had been to make her suffer. That had gone desperately wrong and somehow desperately right. But now, Gray had backed away. Not from David, but certainly from Miah. On the outside, she seemed cool, calm, detached from him, but he knew her. Knew her secrets and her fears. And he was determined to fix it. She was spooked.

His brothers had left the day before and today would be yet another first and another new parent adventure. It was the day of the banquet—the big fund-raiser he’d volunteered for—and David had insisted he and his dad go to Laver to shop. They parked the truck and were passing boutique store windows decorated for spring.

“Do I really need a suit for this thing?” He thought of the tight neck, constricted arms. A shiver ran the length of his body.

David just grinned at him. “Okay, we’re here. Now, the people inside are really nice, but don’t spill chocolate milk on that rug in the center of the room or their smiles sort of morph into the Joker’s while they clean it up.”

Miah ran his sweaty hands over his pants. They had no chocolate milk. “How do you know all this?”

David shrugged. “I used to come here with my dad. He was always getting new suits or shirts or ties.”

Miah groaned. “Will I have to wear a tie, too?”

David thought a moment. “Probably.”

As David grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him toward his unfair destiny, a little piece of Miah’s heart erupted. David was in his element doing this. And that was a beautiful thing. Miah had expected him to try dozens of new things, and he’d done it like the champ he was. This was poetic justice. And in a way, having David telling him what to do and all the excitement rising from the boy was, well, it was pretty great. But a thought brought him to an abrupt stop at the men’s haberdashery door. “David, what kind of fund-raiser is this?”

His laugh was high, happy, and a bit sadistic.

David sank his hands in his pockets and looked Jeremiah up and down. The two scarecrow women—that’s what David liked to call them because they were skinny as bones—stood just behind David, eyes inspecting their work.