Double Heat [Twin Ties: 3] (34 page)

Luka vowed to himself to always be there whenever Evan needed him, whatever shape that need took, and was comforted by the knowledge that Alek would take proper care of one of the owners of Luka’s heart in the meantime.

With Brennan and Evan in Luka’s life, plus the fact that he didn’t need to give up Alek to be with them, it was the ideal, fantasy scenario. Life just didn’t get any better than what Luka had been lucky enough to find. Now, it was just up to him to keep hold of his blessings. Because bad luck had robbed Brennan of his beloved mother, Maggie, and had driven Evan to attempt suicide and have sexual encounters with strangers, then nearly got him killed again when he was only trying to do the right thing, and had brought the past back to haunt them. Tommy and Drew were mistakes and real parts of the twins’ history. They had been haunting Brennan and Evan privately for years. Since the foursome wasn’t secluding itself anymore, the world and all its demons were rushing back in.

It was time to fight back.

Luckily, Brennan and Evan had the Popović brothers fighting on their side. They had Jimmy, Carter, Presley, and others, too. They weren’t alone any longer. They had a family surrounding them, providing more support than they’d ever had before.

Leaving the scavenger crows to dine on their scraps, Luka headed back inside the gym with firm resolve and a devoted heart.

Chapter 28
A Breath of Fresh Air

“If you’re not up for this, that’s okay. I just thought maybe getting back out here, away from town....”

“No, this is good. Getting away is good. Fresh air. Change of scenery and all of that,” Evan replied, arms folded, trying not to feel weird when everything felt weird.

“Are you sure?” Alek pressed. “You seem....”

“Yeah. I know how I seem,” Evan admitted. “I just feel like when you guys look at me now, all you see is....” He couldn’t finish, or define the problem.

“When we look at you, we see how terrible you’re feeling about this—all of this—coming out. We get that it’s a lot for you,” Alek assured him. “This is the first time you have people backing you up with all the facts in hand. We’re not judging you. We’re just trying to process this huge amount of stuff you’ve been living with for years, and trying to help. We hate seeing you in pain. I hate it. But maybe a few hours under the stars, around a roaring fire, would be fun, and a normal thing to do to take your mind off of it. I know being out there in those fields, under the open sky, helps.”

“Yeah. It does. And it’s not too cold, so...” Evan sighed, then dared a glance up at Alek’s face.

“We’ll stay as long as you and Bren want. It won’t be all night, because I know you guys need your sleep too.”

Luka approached where Evan and Alek had been lurking in the hall of their apartment, wearing a curious, eager but cautious, expression. “What’s the verdict?”

“Good to go,” Evan told him. “As long as you guys aren’t weird about it.”

Luka frowned, leaning against the corner of the wall and said, “Are you seriously holding me to the condition that I can’t be weird? Because that’s not gonna work for me.”

Evan started to smile despite himself, but couldn’t fight it.

“It’s not a joke, Evan, I can’t help the way I am,” Luka insisted.

Laughing a little, shaking his head, Evan kept trying not to smile. Luka pulled him into a hug and kissed the top of his head.

“Well, that’s for damn sure,” Alek commented, rolling his eyes.

“Okay. I have a condition of my own,” Luka announced as Brennan wandered over with a mug of coffee.

“Oh no,” Alek groaned.

“Is it amazing?” Brennan asked.

“Oh, it’s amazing,” Luka assured him. “We need to color code the young ones. But that might not be enough. It’s going to be way dark so I think it’s going to have to be stripes and polka dots. Ev, you can be striped and Cupcake is polka dots because they’ll look like sprinkles.”

“What gives you the idea that either one of us owns clothing that’s polka-dotted?” Brennan squinted.

“It’s really not that hard to tell us apart,” Evan told Luka.

Luka gestured up and down Brennan’s body. “He keeps wearing your clothes! It covers telltale features!”

“But you can see what we’re wearing right now. Our necklines are completely different.”

“You expect me to tell you apart based on necklines? Like I said, there will be plenty of darkness. And beer.”

“What do you think is going to happen, you mistakenly slip it to the wrong boyfriend?” Evan asked.

Luka sputtered, then settled on, “...yes. Because there are distinct preferences now and—“

“Can we just agree there will be no slipping of anything to anyone?” Alek suggested.

“Oh, where’s the fun in that?” Evan countered, sulking a little.

They all stopped and turned to look at him.

“What?”

Alek grabbed Brennan, steering him to Luka. “Here, you take this one. Go get ready.” Looping an arm around Evan’s shoulders, he said, “And this one’s mine. Problem solved.”

“Who said there was a problem? I thought this was a pro-swapping relationship?” Evan asked.

“I think Ev’s just trying to get you in trouble,” Evan heard Brennan say to Luka as they walked into their room.

Evan dodged Alek’s arm and crossed the hall to the other bedroom, ducking his head inside. “Are you honestly telling me you’re not pro-swapping?”

Right away, a mischievous gleam appeared in Brennan’s eye.

“Uh-oh,” was all Evan was able to get out before Brennan was on him, pushing him up against the doorframe, kissing him hard, slipping him his tongue. The other twins migrated closer to watch.

Luka said softly, “Wow. I will never get tired of that.”

Evan was trying really hard not to laugh, since his mouth was being expertly tongue-fucked by his brother, but it was kind of hilarious, and the more he tried to stop, the more difficult it became. But the kiss was really good and it started to get him hot. That was the only thing overpowering the laughing fit.

Slowly, after what felt like a really long time, Brennan pulled back just enough for Evan to be able to look deeply into his blue eyes, surrounded by tiny freckles. He brushed his fingers through the short, soft hair a Brennan’s temples.

“Ask me again if I’m against pro-swapping,” Brennan dared.

Evan lowered his chin submissively.“Yes, sir, Mr. Holt.”

“Fuck, that’s hot,” Brennan moaned.

That’s when Evan noticed the other two and snorted with laughter, hiding his face against Brennan’s neck.

“What? What am I missing?” Brennan asked, turning a little to look.

Alek was just a couple feet away, wonderstruck, with Luka hanging on his shoulder, mouth agape. They were both staring shamelessly.

“No, no. Keep doing it,” Luka urged, waving at them.

Brennan rolled his eyes. “Hopeless.” He grabbed Evan, pushed him at Alek. “Here. To borrow, not to keep.”

They parked the trucks out by the lookout spot where Alek and Evan had one of their first dates. They’d packed firewood for a bonfire, plenty of blankets, an air mattress or two, and a cooler full of food and beer. Luka shifted into park, but before Brennan could get out to help unload, Luka stopped him by asking, “You think he’s okay?”

Turning to get a read on Luka’s expression and to decipher intent, Brennan said, “Evan?”

“Yeah.” As lighthearted as Luka had been back at the apartment, he was nothing but sincere now. Actually, he looked genuinely worried. Alek and Evan were walking around Alek’s truck, looking up at the sky. Luka looked like he was questioning the whole night, their whole life.

“Of course he’s not okay,” Brennan replied heatedly. He wasn’t upset at Luka. It was just the frustration built up to dangerous levels. “Nothing about this is okay. He’s taught himself to use his sexuality as bait to lure in some sense of security and comfort, and because of that, he’s had monsters dicking with him since he was a goddamned child.”

“Bren, I know that. I—”

“And that’s Charlie’s fault. And it’s Maggie’s fault.” Just like that, Brennan was shaking with rage, his voice getting louder and louder. “I fucking remember that, you know! How she’d sit there with this miserable fucking expression, staring at the phone and I didn’t know why, but now I fucking know why, Luka! She did this to him! She
chose
to do this to me, and I’m so ANGRY!”

The door had opened. Evan was climbing in, standing on the running board but grabbing Brennan by the shoulders, forcing him to face him, touching his cheek, frowning severely.

“Hey,” Evan said tenderly. Brennan was still shaking, eyes stinging.

“They did this to you! They did this to us!” Brennan cried hoarsely, his voice roughening with emotion. “If we’d had each other sooner I wouldn’t have been with that asshole for so long! I wouldn’t have let Tommy near me because I wouldn’t want a guy like that around you, either! And I sure as fuck wouldn’t have let Drew lay one finger on my brother!”

“C’mere,” Evan sighed, holding Brennan, trying to soothe away the shaking with gentle caresses. Those touches felt so nice, so much like Maggie, that for a moment it only hurt more. He really felt it then, maybe for the very first time—that Evan was first and foremost Brennan’s brother, his twin. He was someone to safeguard and watch out for. He was the most important member of Brennan’s family. But then Evan kissed him in a way that wasn’t brotherly at all and ran the pads of his thumbs lightly down the side of Brennan’s face, drying his tears. “I love the heck outta you.”

Everything Evan was to Brennan was a swirl of love and devotion. Of course they were brothers, but they were more than that, too. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was how important Evan’s wellbeing and happiness was to Brennan, and that right now Evan was hurting.

Growling as he let go of the negativity, knowing it did no good, Brennan took a steadying breath and held on fiercely to Evan, kissing him back, closing his eyes.

“You deserved better than this.”

“We both did,” Evan murmured against his lips. He sat back, took Brennan’s hand and inclined his head toward the clearing with the spectacular view. “Come on. That’s enough for now.”

“Yeah. Okay.”

“You’re amazing with him,” Alek commented, securing the valve on one of the air mattresses, then arranging some blankets. Luka and Brennan were building the fire. “I mean, really. You’ve got this sweet, nurturing side of you, Ev, more than the rest of us. I think I can safely say we’re all really grateful for it.”

“I just hate seeing him so upset because of shit other people did.”

Alek sat, then patted the mattress, covered in a nest of blankets. Evan sat beside him. Alek passed him a beer.

“Thanks,” Evan told him. He popped the cap and took a deep drink. “It’s just... I just know how he feels. Lonely. Scared. Like things are really unfair but you don’t know how to make them right. And all I ever wanted was someone to be there. I couldn’t be there for him before, but now I can. Now, I can always be there for him. That’s how I know it’ll be okay. There’s still a lot of things wrong right now, with both of us, but... look at us, Aleksy.” He gestured around the little campground. The sun was setting, the clouds ablaze with a storm of fiery hues, and the stars just beginning to emerge out of the dark. Luka and Brennan were huddled over the kindling. The night was quiet and windless. Alek began gently rubbing Evan’s back through his sweater. “There’s a lot to be thankful for.”

Brennan glanced back at him, holding his gaze, a hint of a smile playing just at the corner of his mouth.

“This is all I need,” Evan told all of them. “A gorgeous night under the stars with the people I love more than anything, knowing I can be honest with you, and count on you—
really
count on you, even when things go as wrong as wrong gets. I know you guys are worried about me, and Bren. But I’m gonna be okay. I really am. And I’ll do whatever it takes to make sure Bren’s okay, too.”

Standing, Brennan walked to Evan, scooping up yet another blanket, pulling it around his shoulders. He sank down to his knees, straddling Evan. After taking the beer out of Evan’s hand and setting it aside in the grass, he pressed Evan back to the air mattress, drawing the blanket around them both as he cuddled close. The blanket’s edge was pulled up to their necks, the temperate evening air cooling the tops of their necks but their bodies warm and entangled. Brennan began to lazily kiss Evan, wearing a contented sort of grin.