Dom Vs: Domme: The Deluxe Trilogy: A Billionaire Romance (Dom Vs. Domme Book 0) (34 page)

“Ian…” I love the way she says my name. “
Eee-yan.
” The sound is so desperate and drawn out. “Ian!”

Gushing. The heat smacks me in the face, and I greedily eat her, letting my tongue lap up everything tumbling onto it. She’s coming into my mouth, and fuck me sideways, it’s the hottest thing that’s happened tonight.

Her writhing gradually slows, and she eases me off her and shuts off the faucet. The water is at the perfect height. Kathryn looks at me, glowing, her dress falling off and begging me to undress her.

So I do.

Our movements are slow in the candlelight. She mutters sweet nothings into my ear as I untie her halter and help her shimmy out of the red dress. My lips suck the necklace dipping into her cleavage until she unclasps it and lets it fall onto the dress. Her panties fall with grace from her legs, and soon my darling Kathryn is naked and radiant in the candlelight.

“My hair,” she laments, holding it in her hand as I undress in front of her. “I don’t want it getting all wet. I washed it this morning.”

I open one of the counter drawers and pull out an errant hair clasp a long-ago lover left behind. Kathryn snatches it from me while I pull her hair on top of her head. It’s the messiest bun in the universe, and I love it.

I love it even more when she dips into the water, shuddering at how warm and delightful it is. As soon as I finish undressing, I join her, displacing enough water to reach the rim of the tub. My arm wraps around Katie’s shoulders and brings her close to me as I relax against the back of the tub.

Her arm circles in front of me, her cheek against my shoulder. I should have brought us drinks, but the candlelight and bubbles will have to be romantic enough.

“I never thought in a million years that
you
would put something like this together.”

Rarely do I see the ceiling of my bathroom. Can’t say I look up at it very often. Then again, rarely do I soak in the tub. Not alone. If I’m getting in the bath, I want to be with a woman. That’s real luxury.

“You underestimate me,” I whisper into Katie’s ear. “I’m quite the romantic man.”

“Uh huh.” Her lips touch my chest, and I can’t help but wonder what I did to deserve this moment. I thought she would have ran away from me by now.

Especially since she’s acting so submissive.

She probably doesn’t realize it, but the way she defers to my plan, the way she sinks into the tub, and the way she curls around me screams sub. Luckily for her, I can’t really think about it because the feeling of her hand rubbing my skin is lulling me into a light slumber.

I can’t sleep. There are things we need to discuss, and I wait until a few more minutes have passed before broaching the sensitive subject.

“We need to talk, Katie. About the other things.”

Her body tenses in my hold. “Screw you,” she mutters. “Can’t let us have one nice night without bringing that shit up.”

There’s nothing pleasant in her tone. It kills me. “It has to be discussed.”

“Why? You said tonight was about vanilla shit. I don’t want to think about Topping and bottoming, Ian. My thoughts are already muddled with everything else I’m thinking about.”

“Why are you thinking at all? Just relax.”

“What a typical guy thing to say.” Her fingers clench my shoulder. “I don’t know how you men can shut your thoughts off.”

Now it’s my turn to clench her, right on the upper arm. “It’s not a man thing, my dear. It’s also a sub thing.”

“Don’t bring that word up tonight.”

“Katie…”

“Don’t.” The water splashes as she lifts her head and meets my gaze. Her blues are icy flames, and they’re pulling me in, threatening to burn me alive if I say the wrong thing again. “After what happened last time, I want to be myself with you, Ian.”

“What about that wasn’t you?”

She clamps her lips together, blond brows scowling in thought. “Don’t start that shit up. Don’t get you get it, Ian?
This
is what I want tonight.” Her wet hand gestures to the tub, to our nakedness. “I’m comfortable with you. Don’t compromise it.”

“I’m not going to do anything.” Even if she begged me in bed to get rough and Dom her, I wouldn’t do it tonight, no matter how much my body cried for it. I don’t want to take the risk of driving her away again. Every time Kathryn grows closer to me, something happens to scare her off again. I’m sick of that. I’ve learned my lesson. Please believe me, Katie.

She sighs anyway. Shit, the distance is growing between us again. Good job, Ian. How many times have you freaked her out? This is a good example of why we’re not compatible.

I need to remember that. This isn’t a blossoming romance. This is two stupid idiots trying to make something out of nothing – a negative nothing. Our physical attraction to one another will only take us so far.

“I’m sorry,” she mutters into the side of the tub. “I know you don’t expect anything of me tonight.”

Leaning forward, I wrap both arms around her torso, some of the water of the bath splashing over the side and falling down a center drain. My lips kiss her damp back, licking away the water droplets overtaking her. I’m careful to not touch her breasts or thighs as I embrace her again. I don’t want her thinking I’m trying to dominate her.

Although I would really,
really
love to.

I got a taste of her innermost self two weeks ago, and now I can only think of having more. She asked me to train her. She asked me, and yet I know deep down that she can barely handle it.

There’s so much pressure. Pressure from her to be kind, gentle, and the exact kind of Dom she needs to fulfill those fantasies lurking in the back of her mind.

And pressure from myself, telling me to forget all that and plunge myself into her again and again.

“We need to talk, Katie.”

Her arms fold on the edge of the bath, her cheek resting on top of her elbow. I draw a line up her spine, but she does not respond. I nuzzle my nose into her messy bun and inhale the sweet scent of the shampoo she used this morning. Even though my tub is big enough for two people, we’re still cramped in here, and turning on my side to indulge in her body means rubbing my soft cock against her.

Keep this up, and it won’t be soft for much longer.

“What the fuck do we have to talk about?” She’s pouting. I bet she’s adorable, gorgeous. If only I could see her.

I’ll have to make do with touching her seductive body.

“We need to talk about us.”

“Why?”

“Because you’ve asked a lot of me, and I want to make sure we’re on the same page.”

“Do we have to talk about it
tonight?”

“Better tonight than when we’re trying to have a scene and you feel pressured into things you don’t really want to do.” Before she can protest, I say, “You wouldn’t think of it that way at the time. You would try to push yourself like you did the other night. That’s where things get scary for you, and I want to avoid that.”

She doesn’t answer. She knows what I mean.

“Katie,” I say softly, pressing myself against her. “Before we can do any of that, I need you to feel absolutely comfortable with me and trust me unconditionally, because I will push you. There will be times you seriously wonder if you should keep going, out of discomfort and fear. Please believe me when I say I only want our most mutual pleasure.”

I kiss her neck, but not hard. I want to give her an opportunity to speak.

“I don’t know what I was thinking when I asked that of you. It’s pretty clear we don’t operate together that way.”

“You are harboring those fantasies that you want to act upon. They will keep building up inside you until they start interfering with your usual life. I’ve seen it many times. With you… it’s very different, because you’re not like most women. You know what it’s like to seek out and feel powerful. Giving up power is hard, I know.”

Katie presses her forehead against the tub. “Why are you doing this? Why are you taking me out on dates?”

This isn’t a question about domination and submission. She’s asking why we’re even here in this tub, and I admit it’s something I haven’t fully thought through.

“Because I like you, Kathryn. I’m not going to deny it any longer.”

My hands touch her, finally, feeling her supple breasts in my hands and the heat between her legs. I’m gentle, but she knows my intentions. Katie relaxes a little. Not enough for me to make love to her here in this tub, though.

That’s all right. That can come later.

I can barely think about what I said. Of course I like Kathryn. Why would I be doing this if I didn’t like her? I’ve had casual sex with many women who didn’t do it for me, but she’s different. I want to be in the bath with her. I want to take her out to dinner and listen to her talk about her family and work. I
want
to curl up with her like this, feel her warm skin move with her breaths, and listen to her heart beat in her chest as we fall asleep together.

I won’t say it’s love. I’m a practical man, and being with Kathryn would be the most impractical relationship possible.

“I like you too,” she says softly. “But I also kinda hate you.”

I don’t ask for details. Who would want them in this moment?

A part of me understands. I represent a lot of things to her. Fear, foreboding,
embarrassment.
In a way, it’s the same for me. Well, don’t know if I would use the word
hate…

“You know what I want?” Kathryn picks up one of my arms and tucks it beneath hers, so my hand can curl up and cup her face. I roll against her back, feeling the hot water soothe my muscles while Katie’s body soothes my soul. Nope. Not love.

Definitely not
love,
whatever the fuck that is.

“What do you want?”

It takes a few seconds for her to confess her innermost desires to me. For her to trust me enough with these words and not make fun of them. At this point I may still give her a hard time about things, but I respect her enough to know that
this is not the right time.
Instead, I stroke her skin, hoping I can take her to bed soon.

So many plans.

“I want to combat these voices in my head that say I’m somehow weak because you make me feel a certain way. No man has made me want to submit before, Ian. I don’t know what that says about you. I try not to think about it, but I can’t deny that when you grab me, when you growl into my ear, and when you get a little rough with me that I don’t feel so fucking alive. I thought I was ready last time. To explore that side of myself, that is. I realize now that wasn’t the case. Doing that with you requires letting go of everything I thought I knew about myself. As a woman, it’s terrifying.”

“You know that I would never let that leave the bedroom, right?” I am both for and against the idea of a lifestyle relationship for myself. I’ve dabbled in it, and it was fun, but I don’t know if I could handle a sub who needs me to dominate them 24/7. Not just sexually, but telling them how to live their lives and giving them permission to do every little thing. That sounds exhausting.

Not to mention, I like a woman with her own life and independence. They’re much more interesting. So what if two or three nights a week I want to make her kneel down and devour me?

So what?

“I’m not going to think any of less of you, Katie. Not for following your desires and sharing them with me. You’re allowed to be vulnerable around me. You’re not weak. You’re doing what you need to do to be happy. You work so hard to please people and to prove yourself. That’s admirable.”

I hope I don’t come across as condescending. I’ve been accused of that a time or two, and I know that Katie often thinks that about me.

Katie.

I’m the only person who calls her that. The only man.

“It doesn’t matter how much I know that,” she says. “Things are still different. They’re different to me.”

“All right.”

She lifts her head, some of her hair falling from the clasp and landing in the water. She doesn’t care. “I want to still do it, I think. As long as I also get stuff like this.”

I kiss her skin yet again. “You can have it as much as you want.”

It’s not love.

Chapter 6

KATHRYN

The water disappears down the drain. Ian gets out, grabbing a towel and drying himself off as I remain in receding water. His physique is especially handsome in the candlelight. His chest toned, his arms strong, and the lines of his abs curving toward his pelvis. He’s not hard. Well, not
there.
There’s something vulnerable about a man walking around naked in front of you completely flaccid. Intimate. He’s saying he trusts you to not make fun of him – because let me tell you, Ian Mathers is a grower, not so much a shower.

Better than the other way around?

“Let’s get you dried off,” he says, extending his hand down to me. I take it and am lifted up with hardly any effort on my part. Before I know it, Ian’s wrapped a fresh towel around me and is slowly,
tortuously
patting my skin dry.