Authors: Patricia Scanlan
‘If you want to play with us you have to take turns.’ Davey eyeballed Kathryn.
‘He’s right.’ Shauna backed him up. Kathryn realized she wasn’t getting anywhere fast.
‘OK,’ she capitulated.
‘Well done, Davey. Thanks for that.’ Shauna gave her nephew a hug. ‘How about some more 7-Up and a biscuit to keep you going until dinnertime?’
‘Thanks, Shauna.’ Davey basked in her praise.
‘Me, me,’ Kathryn insisted.
‘And you. We couldn’t forget
you
,’ Shauna said caustically as she poured the 7-Up and gave them a few biscuits to take with them.
‘See.’ Bobby smiled at his sister as he came back into the kitchen five minutes later. ‘Easy peasy. Now drink up, kiddo, and let me worry about darling Della.’
‘Did you see the look on her face when you suggested the Amé? She was gagging for a glass of champagne.’
‘Well, she’s not getting any of my Moët, I told you. Imagine arriving with two bottles of plonk for Christmas. How mean is that? Spawn of Scrooge,’ he exclaimed
indignantly.
‘I love you, Bobby.’ Shauna burst out laughing.
‘Right back at ya.’ Bobby held up his glass to her and they clinked together, united against the enemy as they always had been, ever since they were kids.
‘The arse is going to fall out of it,’ Shauna fretted as she and Greg struggled to lift the huge, steaming bird out of the roasting tray.
‘Hold on. Let me get the fish slice under the leg. That’s where it’s sticking,’ Greg muttered, perspiration forming on his forehead as he bent over his task.
‘Quick, slide the plate underneath.’
Shauna did as she was bid, sliding the big platter under the turkey, which was dripping juices and stuffing all over the roasting dish. ‘It’s definitely cooked, isn’t
it?’ She blew her hair out of her eye as she placed the heavy-laden platter on the island.
‘It looks fine, really golden, and the stuffing is gorgeous,’ Greg assured her, licking his fingers.
‘You mash and cream the potatoes and I’ll slice the ham. We’ll let the juices settle before we carve the turkey,’ Shauna said.
The sprouts and the mushy peas were cooked and the roast potatoes and roast parsnips needed just another few minutes.
‘Need any help?’ Carrie stuck her head through the doorway.
‘You’re fine, go and relax,’ Greg told her.
‘I can’t. I feel guilty,’ she confessed, grinning. ‘Here, let me mash them and you do something else.’
‘Bring the cranberry sauce and the bread sauce into the dining room and bring Chloe’s high chair in to the table. You can put her beside me,’ Shauna told him.
‘OK.’ Greg handed the masher to Carrie, who wielded it with gusto.
When he had gone out of the kitchen with the sauce dishes Carrie whispered, ‘I just had to get away from the Mother of Perpetual Sorrows. I’ve had every ache and pain of her
pregnancy. God, she never stops. I couldn’t believe they were here before us.’
‘I should have known. I suppose we were lucky they didn’t land on us yesterday. Is Dad OK in there?’
‘He’s watching
Indiana Jones
and enjoying it, giving Eddie a running commentary the whole way through.’ Carrie mashed vigorously and added a cholesterol-laden dollop
of cream and butter.
Shauna grinned. One of Noel’s more irritating habits was to comment to all and sundry on whatever he was watching on the TV. It drove all his children mad, especially when they were trying
to concentrate on whatever news or film they were watching.
‘Just give Kathryn the smallest piece of turkey and mash, Shauna.’ Della appeared at the door.
‘No problem,’ Shauna said brightly.
‘Are the kids eating in the playroom?’ She perched on a stool at the island, much to Shauna’s irritation.
‘No, they’re eating with us.’ Shauna looked at her in surprise.
‘Oh . . . I see. I thought you’d want some peace and quiet.’ Della sniffed.
‘Della, it’s Christmas. Family time. I wouldn’t dream of them eating separately from us. Christmas dinner with the kids is fun. I love watching Chloe with her cousins.’
Shauna tried to keep the edge out of her voice. She wished Della would buzz off back into the lounge. She wanted to be able to dish out in comfort, using her fingers if she had to without having
her sister-in-law looking over her shoulder. Thank God she hadn’t been in the kitchen when the ass had threatened to fall out of the turkey.
‘Any chance of a streaky rasher?’ Bobby appeared and whisked a crunchy bit of bacon off the turkey breast. ‘Della, what’s a woman in your condition doing in the kitchen?
Go in and put your feet up for goodness’ sake and make the most of it.’
‘Do you think?’ she simpered.
‘Absolutely.’
‘It’s not very fair having Shauna do all the work,’ she said sanctimoniously.
‘Never fear. I’m here. Would you like a cushion for your back?’
‘That would be great,’ she agreed as she followed him back to the lounge.
‘Well done Bobby.’ Shauna gave Carrie the thumbs up as she prepared to carve the bird. ‘Did you hear her?
It’s not fair having Shauna do all the work
.’ She
mimicked her sister-in-law. ‘What a hypocrite!’
‘There! Am I good or what?’ Bobby reappeared and demolished another rasher.
‘You’re such a lick,’ Carrie accused, grinning.
‘I got rid of her, didn’t I, and she thinks I’m the bee’s knees,’ he said smugly. ‘Have you ever seen anything like Eddie? The guy hasn’t stopped eating
since he got here.’ Bobby helped himself to a spoonful of stuffing.
‘Look who’s talking!’ Shauna jeered.
‘No, I mean really going to town on the grub. He’s eating peanuts, crisps, canapés and chocolates. He’ll never eat his dinner.’
‘Oh, never you fear, Eddie will eat his dinner and so will Della and they’ll have tea
and
supper. They give locusts a bad name,’ Shauna retorted as she finished
slicing the breast.
‘Miaow.’ Bobby grinned.
‘Wait until you have in-laws,’ she teased. ‘Any sign of anyone special?’
‘Naw, I’m not looking. I’ve got a few good mates. I like being single. I like my freedom, and being my own boss. A reaction to being bossed around at home, I
suppose.’
‘We were all bossed around, Bobby. You shouldn’t let it stop you from having a relationship,’ Carrie murmured.
‘If I could find a gay Dan I’d have a relationship quick enough, I can assure you. How come all the good ones are straight?’ Bobby moaned. ‘Look at Eddie, he’s to
die for!’
They all laughed as Greg walked into the kitchen.
‘What’s the joke?’
‘Aw, nothing, we were talking about the kids. Honey, will you carve a couple of slices off the other side of the breast?’ Shauna handed him the carving knife. ‘I want to start
plating up.’
‘Mom. That Kathryn one won’t get off Chloe’s new rocking horse and no-one else can get a go. She’s really mean.’ Olivia burst into the kitchen indignantly, followed
by a red-faced Chloe who had been up playing with her cousins for the last hour.
‘Well it’s almost time for dinner anyway, so go and tell Davey to wash his hands and you do the same and we’ll sort out the rocking horse after dinner, OK?’
‘Oh, OK. Can I have loads of turkey?’
‘Loads,’ Greg assured her, cutting a piece of the breast and giving it to her on the end of the carving fork.
‘Oh, yummy,’ Olivia drooled, and blew on it. Chewing happily, she went back to the playroom to boast of having the first piece of turkey.
Ten minutes later, they were seated at the beautifully dressed table and Noel was saying grace.
‘Amen,’ Olivia and Davey said hastily, anxious to tuck in.
‘You know, I’ve waited three hundred and sixty-four days for this,’ Davey said eagerly as he dug his fork into his starter.
‘Well, enjoy it,’ Shauna encouraged him, relieved that they were all sitting down and the meal was under way.
‘You’d think you never got a bite, Davey,’ his mother chided, laughing.
‘Ah, you know what I mean, Mam. Christmas Day dinner only happens once every year.’
‘And very lucky we are, Davey, that Our Lord chose to be made man on this day,’ his grandfather said piously.
‘I suppose it’s really His birthday party,’ Davey observed. ‘We should put a candle on the Christmas cake.’
‘Brilliant idea,’ Olivia agreed.
‘I’m blowing it out,’ Kathryn decreed.
‘Everyone can blow it out,’ Shauna said firmly, as she swallowed some lobster mousse. The starter seemed to be going down well; Eddie had finished his already.
Greg helped her clear away the plates and stack them into the dishwasher, while Bobby brought in the children’s main course.
‘This is scrumptious,’ Davey enthused, pronging a crispy roast potato with his fork as Shauna served the others.
‘High praise. If Davey’s happy, I’m happy.’ She smiled affectionately at her nephew as she sat down herself.
‘When is your baby due?’ Noel turned to Della who was seated on his right.
‘Early March,’ Della informed him, hoping he’d shut up and let her eat her dinner in peace.
‘That’s great. And Carrie’s expecting too. I take my hat off to the pair of you, for following the ideals of Christian marriage. So many couples plan their families to suit
themselves. This modern world is so selfish.’ He glanced down the table at Shauna. ‘Chloe could do with a brother or sister,’ he observed.
‘If you don’t mind, Mr McCarthy, that’s actually none of your business, and it’s not a topic for discussion at the table in front of the children – or in front of
anybody.’ Greg glared at his father-in-law, furious.
Noel turned a deep puce. ‘Umm . . . er . . . I didn’t mean to offend.’ An awkward silence descended on the table. Shauna could have kicked her father hard on the shins. The
cheek of him. She didn’t mind Greg’s taking him to task one bit. It was just unfortunate it was at the Christmas dinner.
‘Gorgeous sprouts,’ Bobby babbled. Carrie looked at him and he had to hide a grin.
‘They’re tasty all right,’ she murmured. ‘Perhaps gorgeous might be a little OTT.’
‘No, the roast potatoes are best,’ Davey argued, completely unaware of the tension. Shauna started to relax again. The first hiccup sorted.
‘Nice turkey,’ Della observed.
‘Are you still working in the health shop?’ Noel enquired, clearing his throat and veering to a safer topic.
‘Oh, indeed I am.’ She turned to him. ‘We’ve expanded, you know.’
‘Dan, have more stuffing,’ Greg offered.
‘Don’t mind if I do. Lovely meal, you guys.’
‘I’ll have some of that.’ Eddie held out his plate.
‘It’s a real treat sitting down to a dinner that’s cooked for you.’ Carrie smiled at Bobby. ‘Do you cook proper dinners or do you eat out of packets?’
Shauna let the waves of conversation drift over her. She looked at the steaming plate of food in front of her but didn’t feel that hungry. A tiredness enveloped her. Adrenalin had kept her
going but now that the dinner was served and she could relax, she felt like going asleep. It must have been the wine and champagne she’d drunk.
‘We’ve built on a small extension to the shop and Marla rents it out to an acupuncturist and a reflexologist. And on Saturday mornings a fortune-teller does readings. She’s
brilliant,’ Della informed Noel. Shauna hid a grin. Della was in for a lecture although she didn’t know it.
‘Well now, you know, Della, that type of thing, fortune-tellers and palm-readers, and tarot cards, goes against the teachings of the Church. The Bible says that . . .’
Shauna caught Carrie’s eye across the table and gave her the tiniest wink. Putting Della and Noel together was an inspired piece of table seating.
‘I don’t want my dinner. I feel sick,’ Kathryn announced.
‘Oh, dear,’ Della murmured. ‘Don’t eat it then. It’s probably all the rubbish you’ve been eating.’
‘She didn’t get any rubbish here.’ Shauna bristled.
‘I didn’t mean that,’ Della said distractedly. ‘Eddie, bring Kathryn into the playroom until I’ve had my dinner, and then you can come and finish yours.’
‘I’ll bring mine with me. I hope she doesn’t puke,’ Eddie grumbled. ‘You’d think that doctor would have given her something yesterday.’
‘You had Kathryn at the doctor? You never said. What’s wrong with her?’ Shauna asked politely.
‘Nothing at all.’
‘A tummy bug.’
Della and Eddie spoke simultaneously.
‘She has a tummy bug?’ Shauna eyeballed Della.
‘She’s just a little off colour.’ Della couldn’t meet her sister-in-law’s eye.
‘Great,’ Shauna said coldly. ‘Let’s hope it’s not infectious.’
‘Want to go to the playroom, Daddy,’ Kathryn whined.
‘Come on, you,’ Eddie said grumpily, taking his plate with him.
‘More wine, anyone?’ Greg asked smoothly.
‘Why not?’ Dan agreed and Greg topped him up.
‘Bobby?’
‘No argument from me.’ Bobby held out his glass.
‘I wonder is it this winter vomiting bug they talk about in the hospitals?’ Noel murmured.
Oh, shut up, you old idiot.
Della was fit to be tied. The old codger was doing her head in.
‘We should all take some apple cider vinegar. Do you sell that in your shop, Della?’ Noel queried.
‘Oh yes, we do indeed. Very effective,’ Della said crossly. When she got her hands on Eddie she was going to kill him. Him and his big mouth.
‘Shauna, more wine?’ Greg eyed his wife warily.
‘Thanks,’ she said, taking pity on him. It wasn’t his fault he had a self-centred, selfish wagon for a sister.
‘Good girl,’ he murmured, filling her glass, relieved that she hadn’t got into a snit about the bug and the way he’d put her father in his place.
‘I don’t think I’m going to fit Christmas pudding. I’m bursting,’ Davey announced cheerfully.
‘Well, if you can’t fit it in now, you can have some later,’ Carrie assured him.
‘I’ll be hard put to it to fit pudding myself, Shauna. This is a delicious dinner.’ Dan smiled at his sister-in-law. ‘Thanks to the both of you for going to so much
trouble. A toast to our hosts.’ He raised his glass.
‘To our hosts,’ echoed Bobby. ‘The hosts with the most.’
Davey guffawed, amused by his uncle, as they all clinked glasses, Olivia insisting on getting out of her chair and clinking everyone’s glass. Chloe waved her plastic mug in the air until
kindhearted Davey clinked with her, and then Dan, and then Bobby.