Dirt Road (40 page)

Dad said, It's a holiday.

Murdo said, It's not a holiday.

Yes it is.

Dad it's not. It's not.

I'm not talking about this here.

Dad, it's not a holiday.

Aye it's a holiday of course it's a holiday. Dad addressed Queen Monzee-ay. It is a holiday, he said. You know that, like a vacation. We're here on vacation.

Queen Monzee-ay didnt reply.

Murdo said, Dad I'm sorry.

What about?

Murdo noticed Sarah's attention distracted by her parents over by the pick-up truck, there with Joel and Gene and waiting to leave. Sarah signaled to them.

What about? said Dad.

Eh, well. Murdo sniffed.

What are ye sorry about?

Nothing. I'm just like thinking maybe I would I mean eh just stay here and just like play with the guys. And come home after.

Dad was staring at him. The others were all intent on what was
happening but keeping their distance. Declan too, now smoking a cigarette and standing back a couple of paces.

Murdo said, Sorry Dad.

Son ye cant. It's not possible. Ye cannay just stay here. It is not possible.

Yeah but if I do the gigs and came home afterwards?

It is not possible.

But Dad.

Ye've got to listen to me here son it is not possible. Ye're sixteen years of age.

Nearly seventeen Dad I'm coming up for seventeen.

Ye're sixteen years of age. Dad glanced at Declan. Declan it isnay possible!

Declan sighed and nodded. It is kinda complicated, like the bureaucracy son know what I'm saying? it's all in there, red tape and like man… Declan shook his head, dragged on his cigarette.

Dad said wearily, Visas and work permits, Social Security cards, Green Cards. Ye've no even got yer passport son I mean ye left it at Uncle John's. Ye left yer passport. Dad peered at Queen Monzee-ay. The boy forgot his passport!

Well he dont need one for Texas, said Queen Monzee-ay.

No! said Sarah.

Declan chuckled, and growled, You don't need no passport for Texas.

Diego said to Esteban: Texas? Passport?

What I'm saying is it's ID for everything. He needs permission. Dad glanced at Murdo: Permission son ye need permission.

Aunt Edna muttered: Permission, toujours.

At the side Esteban and Vicenté were explaining things to Diego in Spanish. Santiago and Roberto were listening closely. Diego nodded. He strolled the few paces to Dad, and stood directly in front of him. Dad stared at him. Diego returned the stare, then he tapped Dad on the shoulder. Hey, he said, Moordo's father. Amigo.

Declan said, Murdo's father is Tom, his name is Tom.

Tom, amigo. Diego laid his hands on both Dad's shoulders: I get permission. For Moordo. I get permission. I get permission now. He turned to Murdo, still with his hands on Dad's shoulders: Moordo hey – Moordo, el musico talentoso.

Murdo smiled, then stopped it.

Diego said: Moordo! You need permission. I give this permission to you. I Diego Narciso, citizen San Antonio in state of Tejas – Texas – all power vested in me, ever and ever forever eternal.

Diego took his hands from Dad's shoulders, stepped back a pace, tapped himself on the chest and wagged his forefinger at Murdo: Moordo! I give to you permission.

Diego faced Tom again, and he signed with his right hand as in a Papal dispensation: All power vested in me I do permit your son, Moordo, y una accordeon, do in hell what he wanna do, okay? Okay.

Dad stared at him. Declan chuckled, and others too, but Dad wasnt smiling and he still didnt answer.

Okay? asked Diego.

Dad still did not smile.

Hay un bar cerca de aqui, said Diego. We may celebrate? Tom, you drink beer with me?

Diego placed both hands onto Dad's shoulders again, staring into his eyes. It was fun but it wasnt. Dad was not good. Dad was trapped. Diego was not smiling so much now. He said: Hey, Tom, boys look out for your son. Dont worry. Got gigs, got money. Your son is okay. In San Antonio is good, good with us. Family is there, I am there. Your son is very safe señor. Is all okay. He got place there. My family, they family; all people and friends. Diego shrugged, indicating Santiago: Crazy one is my nephew, son of my little brother.

Diego nodded to Dad, he smiled a moment then turned to Queen Monzee-ay and Aunt Edna and blew them a kiss. He signaled the band and clapped his hands together sharply: Okay we leave, hurry, say with Moordo for morning; all detail, motel. Hurry. Car keys? Esteban!

Esteban came forwards.

A beer, food.

Si Diego.

Diego's team had two vehicles; a huge pick-up and a huge 4x4. Queen Monzee-ay and Aunt Edna walked with him part of the way and they were talking and laughing. Another guy was driving the 4x4 and he stood by the passenger side waiting. When Diego arrived the man opened the door for him and closed it afterwards.

Santiago was driving the pick-up truck and the other three were traveling with him. Esteban returned for a final word with Murdo, he clasped his hand firmly and said quietly, Tomorrow we come seven o'clock. Okay?

Seven o'clock?

Early early, yes. We come for you. Okay?

Murdo nodded.

Esteban whispered. You say to your father?

Yeah.

Yeah? said Esteban.

Yeah. Murdo nodded.

Okay. Esteban smiled at him a moment longer, then clenched his fist and returned to the pick-up. The others were waiting. They exchanged waves with Murdo from there.

Queen Monzee-ay pulled a wrap more tightly round herself. You find it chilly? she said to Aunt Edna. I find it chilly. Brr.

Cold huh? Stars in the sky, said Aunt Edna.

Declan said to Queen Monzee-ay: Miss Monzee-ay tonight was special and you are very very special. Declan reached to shake her hand.

Thank you sir, said Queen Monzee-ay.

Declan is a musician, said Murdo.

I know, she said.

Declan smiled.

But ye are, said Murdo, ye're brilliant.

Well now. Declan nodded.

Sarah's father was beckoning to them. It was like the final call and Murdo turned from them then turned back again. Eh Murdo! Aunt Edna held her arms out to him for a quick cuddle, but she gave him a longer one. You take care now ya hear!

Then Queen Monzee-ay for another cuddle but this was briefer, hardly at all. Oh we touched noses already, she said, we dont need no heavy hugging! Then she spoke quietly: Now we will be seeing you Murdo okay? You got all the info now huh! She glanced at Sarah who grinned. Emails and stuff, you got that?

Yeah, said Sarah.

Murdo nodded.

Yeah and you know where we're living.

Murdo smiled.

Okay, she said, and put her arm round his waist and smiled to Aunt Edna: This boy laughs at the drop of a hat.

Murdo stared at her.

You are my boy, she said. You think I will forget that? I will not forget it.

Yeah.

Yeah. Queen Monzee-ay nodded. Yeah. She smiled and kept walking.

Aunt Edna called back: We are going for something to eat! Callaloo Kitchen! Mes enfants, Edna goes ethnic, we eat salt fish.

Murdo watched them walk to the vehicles. Sarah was there beside him. They exchanged looks. Sarah smiled. They started toward the carpark area, but keeping a yard apart. Sarah said, It's wonderful you came. We needed you.

Well ye didnt really.

We did, you know we did.

He snorted.

Sarah stopped and put her hand onto his wrist. Murdo…

Ha ha! he said. The idea I wouldn't come!

She kept a hold of his wrist. Oh Murdo.

He was trying to take his wrist away. Sarah let him do it. He looked away from her. Of course I would come. Of course. Ye just eh… I mean… Murdo had gone red, the reddest. His eyes closed a moment, he wasnt smiling. Sarah was watching him.

What? she said. Murdo, what?

Nothing.

Oh Murdo.

I just… Murdo stopped to breathe. What age is Gene?

Sarah gazed at him.

No, he said, I was just eh…

He's twenty.

Is that his car I mean like is it his?

It's old Murdo.

He frowned at her.

Well yeah! she said. Of course it is! My God!

They had stopped walking now, inside the carpark area. Queen Monzee-ay and Aunt Edna had entered the rear seats of one car. Sarah's mother stepped into the front passenger side and her father into the driver's seat. Gene and Joel were closeby.

Sarah whispered, You okay?

…

Murdo?

Yeah, I just feel a bit stupid.

Oh Murdo.

I do. He shook his head and sighed. Then he smiled. Are you still going to that college thing?

Yeah!

He chuckled and was maybe about to say more but she reached for his hand and pressed it. I got to go Murdo. I got to go now. You'll stay in touch huh?

Yeah.

You got to.

I will.

People will want to know.

Murdo nodded. Sarah hesitated then leaned to him, put her arm round his waist and kissed him on the side of the face. Murdo remained, after she had gone in Gene's car; she didnt look back. Her family's car now moved off. Her father tooted the horn. The rear passenger window was down, Aunt Edna peering out. Murdo grinned, he waved to her, he waved to Queen Monzee-ay although he couldnt see her, she was on the other side.

Joel was there by the side of the pick-up and signaling him: Hey Murdo! You forgot something there?

Murdo frowned, he went forwards. It was the rucksack, Joel had his rucksack and accordeon-case, he brought them from the rear of the truck and passed them to him.

Jeesoh!

Joel clapped him on the shoulder then entered the driver's side. We'll see you sometime huh?

Definitely.

You going with the guys?

I think so, yeah.

Yeah. Joel nodded, switched on the engine.

Murdo stepped back. He pulled the rucksack on over his shoulders, lifted the accordeon-case, watching the pick-up roll forwards. Joel had his hand out the side window, a wave. Murdo waved in reply.

At the entrance to the Jay Cee Lounge Dad stood to the side of Declan. Declan was chatting to the cowboy doorman, smoking a cigarette with him. Murdo walked to stand next to Dad. That's them all away, he said.

Yeah, said Dad.

When the cab arrived Dad made to lift the accordeon-case but Murdo kept a grip on it, settled it into the boot next to the ruck-sack. He got into the rear passenger seat, and Dad in the other. Declan sat next to the driver who was a white guy and knew all about the oil industry and maybe worked in it himself at one time
or else knew people who did. Him and Declan spoke about working offshore and named actual rigs and famous guys who worked on them. Quite interesting stuff – Dad was listening – but Murdo was just tired, probably he dozed most of the way.

*

Dad had the key to the room which was on the ground level. A couple of chairs were along from the door. Inside two single beds and a double. The double was nearest the door and had Declan's stuff on it. Him and Dad had six-packs of beer in the room. Declan lifted one and returned outside for a smoke.

Dad sat on the edge of the bed nearest the opposite wall. So the one in the middle was for Murdo. He yawned, lowered the rucksack and accordeon-case down on the floor between the two, and sat on the edge of his, elbows on his knees and hands clasped, gazing at the floor. Ye hungry? said Dad, after a moment.

Yeah! Murdo smiled.

There's sandwiches in the fridge.

Great. Murdo continued to sit there.

Tired?

Yeah.

I'll not ask what ye've been up to! Ye can understand but I was worried.

Yeah Dad, I'm sorry.

I dont mean for ye to apologize, I'm just saying.

I'll pay back the money.

It doesnay matter about the money.

Well I will.

Murdo it's not an issue. It's just how I worry, ye know. I'm yer father. I cannay help it. People worry.

Dad I phoned Aunt Maureen.

I know, it was good ye did.

Murdo sighed, he leaned to drag over the rucksack.

Dad watched him a moment. We have to talk about things. I mean ye must know it cant happen. They're not going to change their rules for ye son, they're not going do that.

I'm not asking them to.

It doesnay matter what Diego said. It would be great if things worked that way, but they dont.

Murdo had unzipped the main rucksack compartment and was poking around inside. He yawned then rose from the bed with his toilet bag and some clothes.

Son ye've got to let me speak.

Dad I need a shower.

No. They've all been speaking except me.

Well I've not been speaking either.

Okay so now's the time.

Yeah but if I can shower first. We can talk after. Dad there will be time.

No there wont. You'll come out the shower and fall into bed, I know what like ye are after a gig.

Murdo groaned.

Hey, I'm not the baddy here. It's just I'm worried. Come on, sit down a minute.

I would rather stand.

They're all in the right and it's me in the wrong.

Ye're not in the wrong Dad.

Of course I am. I'm the only one saying no! no! ye're too young, how will ye manage! Dad shook his head. Seriously, he said. Nay wonder I get irritated. They go home and sleep at night. I dont. How can I? How can I?

Dad!

No. I just lie there, worrying. Bloody Mexico! You're no going to Mexico Murdo I dont want ye going there.

Dad it's Texas.

It's Mexico. That's what they mean when they say the Valley.

Dad they mean the border, the Mexican border.

In America it's the Mexican border, not if ye're in Mexico; it's the American border over there. Whatever it is it's a border. Ye step from there to there. It's a line son not a place.

I thought it was a river.

Dad looked at him. It's a nightmare. That's what it is: killings and murders; dope smugglers, private armies. I've got to tell ye what I think – ye might no like it – it's a fantasy.