Dimmest Of Night (Dimmest Of Night Series)

Table of Contents

• Chapter One
  

• Chapter Two
  

• Chapter Three
  

• Chapter Four
  

• Chapter Five
  

• Chapter Six
  

• Chapter Seven
  

• Chapter Eight
  

• Chapter Nine
  

• Chapter Ten
  

• Chapter Eleven
  

• Chapter Twelve
  
• Epilogue
  

My name is Carma, not to be confused with the Karma with a “K.” Sometimes I think my mother was playing a joke on me when I was born. Other times I feel like she hid secrets within my name. Looking up the definition of my name out of curiosity, it described it as “People with this name have a deep inner desire for love and companionship, wanting to work with others to achieve peace and harmony.” She committed suicide shortly after I was born. Her life was anything but harmonious. Born with my abilities although, they did not come to light until I hit puberty. Like a girl needs any more to worry about. I am an empath, able to decipher ones feelings and emotions. Might sound great to some people, not so much on this end of things. I’m not an ordinary, run of the mill empath. I’m also able to gauge if people are lying. Yes, I am a good old fashioned lie detector test. Going through high school with these abilities was anything but fantastic.

“You’re my best friend Carma.” Lie.

“I would never cheat on you Carma. I love you.” Lie. Lie.

“You know you are a little weird.” Truth.

I just wanted to be normal. To go through life blissfully ignorant of what people really thought of me. To not care if the person next to me was feeling sadness, grief, happiness, or excitement. Never knowing the ranges of emotions people can have until your feeling them all in a matter of seconds. As of lately, my “gifts” are progressing. I no longer have to zoom in on a person to get assaulted with their ranges of emotions. I only have to be next to them, or look at them, or even pass them in a street. Terrified is to small of a word to describe the fear that is overwhelming me with each passing day. Wondering when my abilities will stop progressing. I can no longer separate myself from the emotions of these individuals. I find myself feeling what they are feeling ten fold, now to the point of being physically and emotionally painful for myself.

I am to go out tonight to celebrate my twenty first birthday with a few friends I met in college. The few times I can seem to make it to classes anymore. I have dropped my class load to a bare minimum. I barely date anymore, finding there are more jerks in this world than I initially thought. These are the times I miss my mother. Always wanting, no needing to ask her questions, not being able to do so. Sitting in my small studio apartment, staring at the only picture I possessed of her. Same black hair, same blue eyes, same slender body. The similarities astonishing. The differences subtle. I am taller than she was. Not knowing if I got that from my father, never meeting him. My lips are fuller, eye lashes longer, with dark complected skin. If I had to guess my father has Native American blood in him. Always being asked what kind of heritage I possessed. Their guess was as good as mine. Questions. Always questions.

You would think the city is the last place I would live, having difficulties with my abilities. Truth is, there is no longer a single space in this world I can hide. Believe me, I have tried. As long as there are people in this world I am feeling the closest ones to me. My neighbor to the left of me, is a certifiable lunatic. That I am sure of. The little old lady to the right, the kindest, most gentle soul you can ever behold. The guy above me, sex addict. Don’t need my abilities to know that. Anyone with ears can decipher that. This is my life. I have a strong assumption my mother had the same abilities, leading her to taking her life. Your constantly fighting against the emotions flooding you, taking you over, it’s exhausting.

Lifting myself up off the old faded couch, and making my way across the blue shag rug I left a trail of clothes behind me. I can’t say I’m excited about going out tonight, always afraid I’ll succumb to my abilities. Also, afraid of being the lonely old wench down the street. As of now deciding, the latter would be worse. Walking into my bathroom you barely had room to turn around, it was so cramped. Looking into the mirror, my hair had grown longer. Straight and down the middle of my back, I’ve never had to fuss with it to much. It’s most generally tied up and under a baseball cap most of the time. Working at a sports store isn’t anything I’m excited about, but it pays the bills.

Peeking outside, I could see ghosts and gravestones creeping up from the ground. Witches hanging from trees while goblins were perched up on porches. As if my life wasn’t messed up enough, I share my birthday with Halloween. Sighing, I walked out of the bathroom to put on my costume. I had decided to go to the club as an angel. Laughing at my choice, knowing I was a far cry. Pulling on the bust, I pulled the laces at the bottom tightening them up until my breasts were up to my chin. Looking at myself, I looked like I was going to a lingerie party instead. Knowing all the girls would be dressed this way, still didn’t make it any more comfortable. Fishing through my drawer, and finding my white skirt I pulled it up over my costume, making it more bearable. Glittering a dust of makeup on my cheeks, I scattered it all around my face, making it sparkle. Pulling my hair up, I added white feathers for the full effect. Grabbing my white wings, I pulled my arms through them and strapped them down tightly. My black hair was a stark contrast against all of the white, but I somehow managed to pull it off. Slipping on my white heels, I was out the door.

Cab rides are the worst. Zooming by so many people, with a kaleidoscope of emotions. Trying to ignore the constant pounding in my head. Chicago is a huge city, one you could get lost in. I grew up in a suburb with my foster family. They were actually very nice, but stand-offish at the same time. I lived with them most of my child hood, with a revolving door of other children. They moved out of state two years ago, leaving me alone again. It didn’t change much for me, being alone is something I’m used to. Always trying to find new ways to dampen my abilities. Staying away from people worked well, at first. Not now, unfortunately.

As we pulled up to the night club, my bones were already rattling from the base that was thumping out of the huge structure. Paying and stepping out, I tried to convince myself that I was going to be just fine. I can handle this. I got this. Spotting my friends, they ran over to me with smiles. My friend Wendy dressed as a maid, came up and hugged me first. Carly was second, and thankfully not a hugger. She was dressed as a pirate. We couldn’t be any more different.

“Oh my God. I am so happy you are here! You need to come out with us more often.” Wendy squealed, jumping up and down. “Lets go. I know the guy that works the gate.”

Following behind them, the line was short right now. However, it wouldn’t stay that way for long, being the hottest club in town. Walking up to the huge bouncer he towered above us all, smiling at Wendy when she skipped up to him with her usual perkiness.

“Hey, baby girl. Glad you came. How many you got tonight?”

“Always happy to see you to. Three tonight .” She chirped happily.

“Whew, you got some hot ones tonight baby girl. Who’s the angel?” Looking at me up and down.

“Oh, this is my friend Carma. Carma this is Charlie.” Wendy piped in, not really liking the attention on someone else.

“Whew, Carma. Do I have to do something bad to get a piece of you sweet heart?” Stepping closer to me, I could feel the sexual need wafting off of him. His emotions firing up. I should feel flattered. I wasn’t.

“Wrong Carma. Thanks for letting us in the club.” Trying my hardest to be nice and shut myself off from his barrage of sexual heat.

“No problem baby. If you need anything at all, you just find me.” He said winking at me before he lifted the gate, letting us through.

“I think Charlie likes her.” Carly snicked under her breath to Wendy. Wendy still looking unamused.

Now I felt her jealousy hitting me with force. Why me? I like Wendy. Trying to change the subject. I didn’t have to try for long, stepping inside the huge room, the lights were off and strobes were pumping with the music. People were already on the dance floor bumping and grinding to the beat. One thing came to mind seeing all this in view, and that was freak show. Everyone in their costumes, added an eerie effect to the place. Finding a perch at the bar while they found guys to talk to, I ordered a coke and vodka. Drinking never helped, or worsened my abilities, but it may make me be able to stand all the obnoxious people for a while.

The bartender was in good spirits and exuded that from several feet away. Those emotions weren’t as bad to be assaulted by. The depression, sadness, anxiety, remorse and guilt. The bad list goes on and on. Those emotions I can’t seem to wipe away. It feels like they coat a layer around my very soul, never to be able to shake off. The girl sitting two seats down was already drunk, and a mixed bag of emotions. She was telling her boyfriend how he was the best thing that ever happened to her. Lie.

Sighing and looking around, I couldn’t locate my friends and the club was filling up fast. Deciding to stay put, my abilities are worse when I come into any skin contact with someone. Now unfortunately, there were barely any paths to get anywhere. Arm to arm with sweaty, clubbers. This is my night. Praying that Wendy and Carly wouldn’t find me and try to convince me to dance. Knowing eventually, my luck would run out.

Turning the bar stool around and leaning back onto the counter I nervously crossed my legs. Scanning the room, concentrating on blocking everything out of my head I spotted a tall man leaning up against the wall, staring back at me. He was across the room, but he stood out among everyone. It was impossible to measure him up from this distance. To many people in the club. I couldn’t begin to sort out everyone’s emotions. Going by sight alone, he looked like a bad ass. Not knowing if that was his intention, or if that was just him. He was dressed in all black, with black short hair, and a muscular build. He was really tall, adding to his foreboding tone. At least, six foot four. Leaning up against a wall, his arms crossed. A girl stumbling into me, a depressed mess, breaking my concentration. Sucking in my breath, the pain behind my eyes was like an electric shock. Stumbling away from me, my vision cleared, and he was gone as fast as he appeared.

Scanning the room, I no longer spotted him anywhere. Turning back around, I couldn’t shake the way he was staring at me. Gazing at me with intense eyes. Shaking my head, I boiled it down to paranoia and nervousness. Now regretting even coming. Why was I thinking that I could have a fun filled night out with friends like normal people? When will I realize that I am not normal?

Sitting on this hard bar stool another hour, I down graded to just a coke. In that time two guys hit on me, trying to get me to leave with them. I wasn’t interested. Still wondering where that “mystery man” went to. Wondering now if he was just a figment of my imagination.

“Carma! Carma! Lets go dance.” Wendy excitedly said trying to pull me out onto the dance floor.

Her excitement vibrating through my own body. She was already drunk. Crap, she found me. Now my own apprehension bubbling up to the surface. Making my way to the dance floor I was careful not to touch anyone, but it was just to crowded.

“Wendy, I think maybe I should go.” Apprehension giving away to fear. Lights flashing in a dizzying motion. People bumping all around us. Looking around, I thought I caught the mystery mans face again. However, it was to quick and I couldn’t be sure. Shaking my head violently, trying to get control of myself. Some guy grabbing Wendy’s hand, taking her away from me.

“Come here baby. Dance with me.” Some young man close to my age said, forcing me against his body. My own body being assaulted with all of his emotions at that moment. Anger, sexual tension, all being magnified by the liquor in his system.

“No. No thank you.” The first searing pain behind my eyes.

“Oh honey, you’re so fine. I’m going to make you mine tonight.”

Truth. He actually believed that. Another person bumped into my back forcing me into him. Now not only assaulted with his emotions, but hers also. Excitement and happiness. Boom another person. Depression, anxiety and fear. The pain behind my eyes now searing, almost unbearable. My hand going up to my head, willing my vision to come back. I can not pass out and become helpless to this douche bag that is all over me right now. Telling myself before I lost control of the situation completely. Boom another person. Evil, pure evil this time. To much. Falling to my knees, my vision was hazy and I could feel his hands on me. Suddenly, I caught a glimpse of “mystery man.” He was kneeling down beside me now. His hands are on me. Things are getting quiet now. It’s to late, I can’t hold it together anymore.

“Everyone back.” He said. His voice commanding. His presence intimidating. The grabby guy backing up immediately. Not stupid enough, even in his drunk state, to mess with this guy.

“Don’t worry angel girl. I got you.” He whispered in my ear. The last thing I remember before my world went dark.