Diary of a Mad First Lady (35 page)

Dawn

P.S. Although simple, I hope the kiss meant as much to you as it did to me. Your reaction was priceless.

It took heaven and the entire host of angels, to keep me from running out of that room and kicking down Daphne’s door. How could Darvin fall for her, out of all women?

I paced the floor angrily, trying to figure out what I was going to do. My strategy had been to come here, surprise Darvin by showing up at the evening service, and spend a quiet evening informing him about the latest of Daphne Carlton. The nerve of him to be having dinner with the enemy!

I was unsure of how I wanted to deal with this.

No, I knew exactly how I wanted to deal with it, but I knew I couldn’t behave improperly as a first lady.

I picked up the phone and placed a call to the bellman to come and get my bags. I needed to get another suite in order for me to carefully devise my plan. I couldn’t take any chances; one mistake would push everything awry.

Two hours later, I drove up to Bethelite International Baptist Church. In all of the times Darvin had preached here, I’d never come. I wasn’t into being the traveling Pastor’s wife, preferring more to tend to the things at home.

The church was beyond striking, and thousands of people filed into the building for tonight’s service. My heart warmed at the thought of these people coming to hear what my husband had to say. Darvin had definitely achieved an elite status among Pastors, and it showed tonight as parishioners hurried inside to get good seats. I was only planning to stay long enough to get a message to Daphne. I prayed that God would hear my prayer, and I would easily be able to slip the note to her.

I took a seat in the back of the church as others breezed by not knowing who I was. Service was soon underway. it felt abnormal being a part of the audience and not being on stage.

After the usual praise and worship, and all other elements of the program, Darvin entered the massive pulpit. The church erupted in applause. I went from being angry with him to feeling a sense of joy. I was so caught up in the moment, I almost missed Daphne bouncing in like a spring chicken. I must admit, she was dressed to kill. With every step she took, my fists balled tighter. I could just see myself knocking her teeth out. But I had to stick to my plan. For now.

Once she was seated, I motioned for the usher. He walked over to where I was sitting.

“You see that young lady over there in the powder blue suit? The one who was just seated over there on the end?” I pointed.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“She’s a friend of mine, and I’m going to have to run. I didn’t want to walk down the aisle, so if you could just give her this note, I would appreciate it.”

“I sure will. I’ll do it right now.”

I watched the usher walk over to Daphne and give her the note that I’D expertly written in Darvin’s handwriting. As his wife, I’d done it a million times for one reason or another. By the time she unfolded it, I’d disappeared.

As I walked back to my car, I smiled. I would get rid of Daphne once and for all.

Forget being a first lady.

Forget the expectation that I had to take whatever was given.

Not anymore. Never again.

Yes, I still had to deal with Darvin, but I would concentrate on him later. Right now, my target was the woman who’d tried to wreck my life.

And this time, I aimed to bring her down.

Chapter Thirty-five

Daphne

Just as Darvin was entering the pulpit, an usher handed me a note.

Chills raced the length of my spine. The last time I received a note in church, it was from Solomon. Surely he wouldn’t have followed me here. Or would he?

I opened the note written in Darvin’s handwriting, and a huge smile spread across my face. It read:

J
UST
WANTED
YOU
TO
KNOW
THAT
I
’
M
THINKING
OF
YOU
—
ONLY
YOU
. T
HANKS
FOR
ALL
THAT
YOU
DO
.
–P
ASTOR

I wanted to stand up and shout, “Hallelujah!” I’d finally won him over. He was finally able to see just how much he meant to me. The way I felt right now was enough to make me forget all of the hills I had to climb to get to the top of the mountain. It didn’t matter anymore, because my new life had just begun. Tonight, Darvin would accept Bethelite’s proposal, and tomorrow morning, I would wake up in his arms.

I watched Darvin in his element as he maneuvered the crowd with the exquisite manner in which he spoke. Thousands of people watched him with an eye of respect, grateful that God had sent him. Some were even throwing money at his feet, further pushing him up the sermonic cliff.

“Church, no matter what the enemy tries to do, God is still in control,” he encouraged.

Amens rang throughout the building.

“I have found myself in the lion’s den, just as Daniel. I have found myself facing a Red Sea, just as Moses. On many occasions, I’ve found myself in the valley of dry bones, just as Ezekiel. And Lord knows I’ve found myself in the valley of the shadow of death, just as David.” People were nodding their agreements. “But, saints, I’m here to leave you with a word of hope. I’m here to let you know that we serve an awesome God. I’m here to tell you that Jesus can bring you peace in the midst of a storm. There is a way out of no way. Reach over and tell your neighbor, ‘you can make it.’ ” Everyone did as told, and he continued. “I want to inform some woman who’s at the end of her rope that God can and He will deliver. Some man, tonight, might be on drugs—my brother, you don’t have to get high on crack. You can get high on Jesus!” he shouted.

By this time, not a single person was sitting, including me. For the first time in a long time, I actually felt the spirit fill me. I could testify to everything that he preached. I was a living witness that just when you feel all hope is lost, God will throw you a lifeline.

The church service had been awesome—that was, up until Darvin made the shocking announcement that he would not take on the pastorate at Bethelite. Everyone was stunned—including me.

Hours later, I was waiting in the penthouse, hoping he would show up. My hopes and dreams of becoming the First Lady of Bethelite had been crushed. I was so sure that he was going to accept, I hadn’t intended on a defeat. I concluded that something must have happened between the morning services and the evening service. There was no way any pastor in his right mind would turn down such an opportunity as he was given.

Needless to say, I was a little perturbed. Tonight was my last chance to get Darvin to fall in love with me before we were back in Atlanta.

Atlanta.

I couldn’t go back. There was nothing there for me if I didn’t have Darvin. I’d arranged to move everything here. If I went back, Solomon or Twylah were sure to expose me. Even if they didn’t have any proof of my true identity, it was still too risky. I was beginning to get depressed. Darvin had destroyed everything.

Dressed in a black negligee with a satin robe serving as my covering, and standing amidst the dimly lit room, I walked over to the window and gazed down at the buzz going on outside in the busy street. I then cast my focus to the city’s skyline. I was growing more disappointed by the second. Baltimore was supposed to be my new home.

Drowning in my despair, I nearly missed the faint sound of the key unlocking the door. My heart quickened, and the dejection I felt seconds earlier was all replaced with hope—hope that Darvin wouldn’t leave this penthouse without expressing his love for me. If he did that, I could work on getting him to change his mind about Bethelite.

I inhaled and exhaled a deep breath all in an instant. The moment I’d been waiting for was finally here. A part of me had believed he wouldn’t show up.

Without moving away from my position, I decided to break the ice. The moonlight was only casting its glow on me; the rest of the penthouse was in total darkness. I couldn’t see him, but I could smell his scent—almost feel his touch.

“Pastor, I’m glad that you came. I was unsure about inviting you here, but after last night, I felt that the attraction between us was too strong to resist.” I paused for a moment, and when he didn’t say anything, I continued. “I hope that you don’t feel I’m being too forward, as I was last night when I kissed you, but I couldn’t go another day without telling you how I feel. You see, I’m in love with you, and I have been for a long time.

“Now, before you say anything, I’m sure this is a surprise to you. I’ve been trying to determine the proper time to tell you, but there never seemed to be one. You’re so vague about your feelings, and I was afraid that they weren’t mutual. For so long, I’ve wanted to just hold you in my arms and give you the treatment that you deserved. Oh, Pastor, you’re such a good man.”

He cleared his throat. “Dawn, I never saw this going beyond platonic reasons.”

“I know. I wanted to tell you so badly,” I said, walking closer to the sound of where his voice was coming from. “Pastor, if you only knew how much I loved you. What I’ve done to be with you. The depths I’ve traveled to prove my love for you.”

“I think I know.”

“Really?” I was relieved that he had noticed my advances.

“Yes, Daphne, I know.”

My heart stopped beating. The Earth stopped rotating. I believe hell even froze at the sound of my real name coming from his mouth.

“Pastor, you just called me Daphne,” I said nervously.

“Stop the games,” he said. “I know who you are.”

I remained as still as the morning dew. I kept swallowing, hoping to wash away the lump in my throat. I didn’t know what to say.

He continued. “Why didn’t you just tell me who you were? How do you know that I wasn’t in love with you as Daphne? How do you know that I wouldn’t have been thrilled to know that you were back?”

Huh? What did he just say?

“Excuse me?”

“You should have just been honest with me,” he said.

I felt his presence drawing near.

“Would you have really accepted the fact that I was Daphne, after you and your wife made it clear that you didn’t want me anywhere near you? After all, you treated me like scum, and even invoked a restraining order to keep me away. What was I supposed to do? Run up to you and say, ‘Hey, Pastor, I’m back’?”

“The truth would have helped. How am I supposed to be with you knowing that you’ve lied to me? What if I had taken that church tonight, and began a new life with you as Dawn, when in actuality you’ve been Daphne the entire time?”

So, I was the reason he didn’t take the church?

“How did you find out that I was really Daphne?”

“Is that really important? The point is, I found out. And I’m hurt, because I trusted you.”

His words sliced into my heart deeply. I couldn’t believe that I’d had his love all the time, and had nailed myself to the cross with my lies.

“Darvin, I’m so sorry,” I said as I moved toward him. “Please, please forgive me. I only did this because I love you. I want to be with you. I want to be your wife,” I said through tears.

“Is that why you’ve been posing as my wife?”

“Yes,” I said hesitantly.

The room grew quiet.

All of a sudden, the lights came on. The force of the light in a room that had been dark was blinding, but it was not too blinding to notice that Darvin and I were not in the room alone.

Michelle was standing next to him.

Chapter Thirty-six

Michelle

The expression on Daphne’s face as she stood helpless was as exhilarating as the day I got my first kiss. The way her eyes bulged out of her confused head almost made me laugh at her pathetic self.

“It’s funny how things change when the tables are turned, huh, Daphne?”

“Michelle . . .”

“Don’t you dare speak my name out of your mouth,” I said through gritted teeth. She didn’t know how close I was to exploding. “I’m doing the talking in here. I want you to shut your mouth. As a matter of fact, I want you to sit down in that chair next to the lamp and shut your mouth—until you’re spoken to.”

She did as I ordered. Boy, did this feel good.

“Michelle, we have what we need for the police; her admitting that she’s Daphne,” he said, referring to the tape recorder he was holding that had captured her entire confession. “Let’s just stop and wait for the police to get here.”

“If you don’t shut up talking to me, you will regret anything else you might say tonight.” I glared at him, daring him with my eyes to test me. “Neither of you will tell me how to feel. I’ve been through enough of this hell, and you will not tell me what I need to do. Is that understood?”