Devour, A Paranormal Romance (Warm Delicacy Series, Book 3) (2 page)

“That’s why we burned the dark vampires. Their essences can never visit their bodies.”

“Good.” A smirk crept onto my face. He’d explained it to me before the fire, but after having witnessed it, I understood better.

“I’ll be right outside your room if you need me.”

I nodded as he placed a kiss on my cheek. His fingers traced my jawline briefly before he stood up and marched out. I wanted him to stay with me, to sleep beside me through the day, but I didn’t tell him that. I don’t know why. Maybe I was afraid of taking things to the next level, or maybe I was afraid he’d turn me away again. I knew it didn’t make sense. Arrick’s and my relationship had never been better, aside from the state of the world around us. But, as I was drifting off to sleep, I realized the true reason for my hesitation. I was afraid of living in a world without him in it. If I allowed us to get as close I wanted, to fall in love and spend an eternity together, I stood the risk of knowing the utter agony of losing him. After watching Mara spiral downward into a deep pit of despair from the loss of her mate, I wasn’t sure I had the strength to survive that. Could I even survive it now? We were already linked together on a much deeper, more intimate level than any normal vampire couple. The pain would be that much more excruciating after spending centuries together. Is it better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?

***

Something sharp stabbed at my neck, making me nearly scream out of my slumber before it got caught in my throat. My fangs salivated, ready to latch onto whatever was attacking, but what I found immediately softened me and quashed my hunger. Louie was perched atop my chest, padding his little heart out as he purred loudly.

“Hey, fat boy.” I scratched his chin. “You scared the heck out of me.”

He closed his eyes, ignoring my comment, and lifted his chin to give me a better angle from which to scratch him. He was such a spoiled kitty, but he definitely deserved it. I stayed in bed with him a while, letting him get his fill of affection while I tried to avoid the night that lay before me. Tonight would be much more difficult than the one before. Although it was hard to control the anger that the funeral pyre ignited, there was a place deep inside me that enjoyed watching them burn.

Tonight there would be no retribution; there would only be goodbye.

The night was chillier than usual and the cold air seeped into my skin all the way to my bones as soon as I left the comfort and warmth of my bed. I’d always enjoyed summer more than winter, but now as a vampire, I hated winter even more. With my sharper senses I could feel the frosty air with much more intensity than ever before. Sure, my body temperature ran much colder than when I was human, but that didn’t mean I liked it. I was probably the only vampire in the entire realm that preferred to be warm.

A robe was draped at the edge of my bed, so I slipped it on before heading out to my sitting room. The silky fabric didn’t do much to ward off the cold. I found the room empty, with nothing but an abandoned blanket and throw pillow on the small sofa. Guilt twisted my stomach, and I regretted even more that I didn’t invite Arrick into my bed. At least we both would have been warmer.

I knew he wouldn’t have left me alone, so I headed to the one place I knew he’d be. The curtains of my balcony flapped fiercely in the cool night wind. It released an earthy smell into the air letting all know that fall was coming.

Arrick sat on the edge of the stone railing, his feet dangling over the side as the moon glowed on his skin. I stood in the shadows a moment, taking in his presence. He seemed more handsome to me every time I saw him. Without even realizing it I was weaving a ribbon of emotion and sending it out on the wind to him. It carried the one thought that was lacing its way through my entire being and binding itself to my heart. He was mine.

He turned almost lazily around and set his eyes upon me. His lids were heavy with emotion; and despite the cool night, the warmth of his body penetrated the air and I longed to feel it against my cold skin. I stepped confidently out of the shadows, allowing the wind to blow the robe from my body and dance with my hair, whipping it about as my long curls churned in the moonlight. He opened his mouth to speak, but my lips sought his before he could utter a single word. There was no hesitation. His tongue mingled with mine as we gave way to the connection between us. Warmth spread throughout my body, nourishing every inch of my being. I was no longer thirsting for blood; no longer afraid for the souls of my loved ones or myself, and no longer filled with a chained rage that begged to be released. There was only my lust, an ache building inside, a storm of desire. In seconds, his arms were around me and he twirled me around, leaning me up against the ledge of the balcony. His hands clasped my neck before traveling through my hair. I wanted to drown in the passion, allow it to swallow me and take me to another world of love and endless joy.

Our lips parted briefly as Arrick gasped for breath. He lifted me up, sitting me atop the ledge where he had once sat. I looked into his eyes, searching for the glimmer of his soul within them. For an instant, I thought I caught a glimpse of it; or perhaps it was only a reflection of the ample moon behind us, or the millions of stars that flickered in the sky. He smiled as I admired him, pressing his forehead against mine. Sensations swirled through my body like smooth, delectable chocolate mixing with a single ripple of fear as I teetered on the edge of the balcony.

“You make me crazy.” He breathed the words as he moaned through the passion.

“Do I?” I exhaled softly onto his neck.

“You know you do.” He kissed me softly again before pulling back and holding my face in his hands, brushing my cheeks with his thumbs. “You’re so beautiful.” An expression altered his face into something I’d never seen him on him before. It was definitely fear, I was
very
familiar with that one, but there was something else. Could it be love?

“I want you to see something.” He placed my fingers on his lips before pulling me down from the ledge and twirling me like a princess on the dance floor. A giggle escaped me and I slapped my hand over my mouth. I hadn’t laughed in so long that it felt alien to me, and on a night like tonight it felt wrong.

He smiled encouragingly when he caught my startled expression, pulling my back against his chest. I followed his finger with my eyes as he pointed up to the night sky, where the massive moon hung like a sparkling diamond. Gasping, I stepped closer to the railing.

“I’ve never seen it look like that before.” I cast my eyes across the luminescent globe, painting every inch of it into my memory.

“It’s almost as beautiful as you are tonight.”

His breath tickled my ear and I let out a sigh. He was being awfully sweet to me. I just woke up and I was still in my pajamas, I couldn’t be
that
beautiful.

“Why does it look like that?” In all my life, human and vampire, I’d never seen the moon like that.

“My mother used to call it the Moon of Tears.” He’d never talked much about his parents before and as much as I wanted to ask him more about them, now wasn’t the time.

“Moon of Tears?” I buried myself deeper against his chest.

“Yeah, look.” He pointed to a darker spot in the sky toward the northeast edge, just over the nearby forest.

I followed his direction. “What am I looking for?” Just as I said it, movement grabbed my attention. What I had thought were merely stars before was more than that. “Are those shooting stars?”

“No, they are falling stars,” he said, sadly.

“Tears.” I understood his mother’s name for it now. It looked like the night sky was crying stars. They floated downward toward the earth, flickering sparkles capturing the light of the moon. “It’s so stunning, but so sad at the same time.”

“I was thinking the same thing before you came out here. I was wondering how something so amazing could be so depressing.”

“How come I’ve never seen them before?”

“Well, the last time I ever heard of this happening was after the Dark Ages. And even if it has happened since then, I don’t think humans can see it.”

I spun around in his arms. “Do you think they’re Nyx’s tears?”

“I’d like to think so. If it is her tears; that has to mean she is watching over us, right?” I nodded.

I thought the very same thing. If it weren’t for my belief in Nyx, I might never have made it through my transformation, and I definitely wouldn’t make it through what was to come. The thought brought chills stampeding down my spine, and sobered any passion left between us.

“We’d better get ready. What time do we need to be at the forest’s edge?”

“Midnight.” Arrick gave the moon one last, longing, glance, no doubt casting a silent prayer to Nyx.

Judging by the distance of the moon from the horizon, I guessed that only gave us about two hours to get ready. As with most ceremonies in my new life, tradition dominated and there were customary garments that had to be worn. Arrick had already pulled our cloaks from the closet. They were a lot like the ones used in our Blood Mate ceremony; only these were a deep navy blue, flecked with infinitesimal silver beads covering its entirety. No doubt they were made to resemble the night sky.

I lifted the smaller of the two cloaks from its hanger, holding it before me as I stood in front of the mirror. I felt ridiculous wondering what I should wear under it, or for even caring how I should do my hair. Neither of those things mattered, but I was so desperate to keep my mind off what I would have to do tonight that I forced myself to do it anyway.

“They were made to symbolize Nyx and to help guide the lost souls of the fallen to her.” Arrick walked up toward the mirror behind me while he buttoned up a black dress shirt. I stepped aside to take in his full form. Dressed head to toe in sleek black, he looked dapper and sophisticated. It was a far cry from his usual ‘tight, dark jeans and flannel shirt with leather jacket’ look, yet it still seemed to suit him. I drank in the sight of him and my heart teased with the thought of allowing him to take my mind off my worries again to kiss him until dawn and sleep my sorrows away. But as much as I wanted to, tonight wasn’t the night.

Sighing heavily, I did my best to put a stopper on my attraction, at least for tonight. I guess it was a normal reaction. When you lose people you love and care about, those that remain become that much more important to you; and you realize you don’t want to waste any second you have been given with them. Especially when war is the only thing that exists in the future. Many more precious souls would be lost before this war was over.

I followed Arrick’s lead, donning a simple black dress that flowed down to my knees; the lace trim tickling my skin. I felt like a robot as I moved mechanically around my closet, pulling on plain, black ballet shoes and clipping on black pearl earrings. My thoughts wandered to Robin more than anyone else. I hadn’t seen my friend much since I’d gotten back. She had always been an endless ray of sunshine in a world of eternal night, but now she was the polar opposite. I swore to make it my goal for the night to be there for her in any way I could.

Someday she’d be happy again.

I’d make sure of it, or die trying.

As much as I’d enjoyed Arrick’s efforts to distract me earlier, I wasn’t sad when he gave me space to get ready and collect myself. Tonight we were burying our loved ones; saying goodbye to precious souls who would never again speak our names, embrace us, or fill our lives with their treasured presence. Rage began to bubble, but I forced it down to a simmering heat. I couldn’t let myself lose control tonight.

With the cloak draped over my shoulders, I exited my closet avoiding the mirror. I honestly didn’t care what I looked like, and I felt the need to avoid looking myself in the eye. Over the past few days I was slowly becoming someone I didn’t recognize anymore, and that wasn’t who I wanted to be.

Moonlight poured into my sitting room as if it were trying to wash away the pain I’d experienced in this place. I stepped into its glowing beams, allowing it to seep into my pores and calm me from the inside out. My jaw unclenched and my shoulders relaxed, I hadn’t realized how tense I was. Expelling a breath, I turned toward Arrick who was sitting on the edge of the couch.

“Ready?” he asked, looking like he dreaded the evening’s events as much as I did.

“As I’ll ever be,” I answered, heading for the door. Arrick sped to my side and linked our fingers together as we weaved our way through the crumbling hallways. Where there were once beautiful tapestries, fresh cut flowers and intricately woven rugs were now piles of debris and shattered memories. It was leagues cleaner than when I first arrived, but there was a lot of work to be done before the palace would be back to its former glory.

We passed servants and construction workers on our way out of the palace as they cleaned up their work areas after a long and hard day’s labor. I avoided their gazes and ignored their bows or curtseys as I passed by. They were happy to see me because they still believed
I
was their princess. Would Nicolae ever tell them the truth of what happened here? Of what was happening everywhere? From what I’d heard so far, they’d been led to believe that the anti-vampire protestors attacked again. How much longer will that excuse work? Did everyone really believe that?

Maybe it was time our regions stopped living separately and started uniting together. We probably just made ourselves easier targets living the way we had for the past few hundred years. If it weren’t for Nicolae kidnapping me, I’d have grown up in Naos. Would Baal have still attacked? If so, we might not have stood a chance. Right now, the only thing connecting our two regions was me. It didn’t make Nicolae’s actions justified, but it certainly made me think. Maybe everything
did
happen for a reason, even the bad things. Baal could have picked us off one by one and we would never have been the wiser. As soon as we got back to Naos, I knew what I had to do. If we were going to win this war we were going to have to start fighting together, and not just as allies in battle, but in life as well. We needed to start uniting our regions; living as one. Allowing people to travel back in forth if they wanted to, without fear of punishment.