Devil Mail (4 page)

“Well, come on let’s go then.”
Just then, the telephone rang. It was Judith.

“Hey,
Jude. Listen I can’t talk now. Jules is here. We have aerobics tonight. I’ll call you later.” A hint of impatience came over Angela’s face, as she said, “No, nothing much so far. Only one. No, I haven’t yet. I’ll call you later. Bye.” She hung up, took a deep breath and turned to Julia. “Jules, I worked late and haven’t even eaten yet.”

“And there’s more,” Julia replied,
as a result of her exacting ability to read her sister. The two made their way to the kitchen. On other occasions when Angela had worked late, she would postpone dinner until after aerobics or zumba class. Before Angela was able to respond, Julia pulled the laptop around to face her for a better view. “What’s this?”

Angela smirked coquettishly.
“It’s…”

Julia’s mouth parted in amused astonishment
as she interrupted, “Is this…a dating website?”

“Yes, I…”

“Why did I not know about this?” Julia became louder and looked at Angela suspiciously, the very same way she did six months earlier, when they were both party to a sugar-free diet pact, and Angela came out of their mother’s kitchen with telltale sugar granules at the corners of her mouth, collected there from the doughnut she had covertly scoffed.

“I was going to tell y
ou; I only subscribed yesterday.” Angela sounded almost apologetic.

“You sneaky cat,” Julia
continued, expressing her surprise.

“Anyway, there’s nothing h
appening for me. I sent out two messages last night and only received one back. Plus, today, I got one message from this guy that is just out of the question. I guess I’m just not dating material.”

“Angie, i
f you only subscribed yesterday, you have to give these guys a chance to reply. Listen, most people have commitments, they don’t live on the website. People have to work; you do want someone with a job, right?”

“Of course
.”

“Well, then. There could be any number of reasons why
they haven’t answered yet. Give it time, deal with the one that has replied and stop talking trash about yourself.”

At Julia’s request, Angela pulled up the message from Aiden Jacobs, and explained her frustration at not being able to find anything witty or clever to say in response.

Julia agreed that Angela should not be so quick to share her telephone number and should feel secure enough to correspond with the men on her terms. “You don’t need to say anything clever or witty. Besides, you don’t want to lull them into a false depiction of your true character.” Angela slapped Julia’s arm lightly. She had always found her teasing quite comical. Julia proposed that if she wrote a response for Angela, then Angela had to promise to go get ready for aerobics class and take her mind off dating for an hour. Angela agreed.

Julia was a legal secretary
, adept at piecing together her boss’s true intentions and his garbled dictation in order to formulate comprehensible documents, thereby deflecting the humiliating light that would otherwise be cast upon a good man to whom she was veritably devoted. She was fascinated with the powerful nature of words.

By the time Angela had changed into her workout shorts and camisole, Julia had replied to
Aiden’s message, logged off and shut down the computer.

“I need to see what you wrote,” Angela said sharply, disturbed by Julia’s thoughtlessness.

“Read it when you get home.” Julia’s response was flippant.

“Tell me what you wrote!
” Angela demanded.

“He’ll love it, and you will too,” Julia smiled and pushed her towards the door. Julia was, by far, the more stubborn of the two, and Angela had learned to choose her battles wisely. She knew that if Julia had made up her mind not to tell her,
pursuing the matter would be fruitless.

Angela remained annoyed with her sister throughout the entire aerobics class, and whereas the class would usually function as a welcomed stress reliever, Angela found tha
t at the end of it, she was as tense as when she began, just a lot sweatier and more out of breath. 

As soon as she arrived home, she logged onto the website intending to see what Julia had written to Aiden.
Notification that she had new messages caught her eye and she clicked her inbox to see if the messages were more promising than the earlier one. A message from MattCu28 read:

             
“
Hello Pretty Lady,                                                       

I’m looking for a friend
who will always be by my side; even when we’re physically apart. Interested?

Matt
”

              Angela disagreed wholeheartedly with the person who coined the phrase, ‘flattery will get you nowhere’.  She was completely flattered, not to mention impressed by the fact that he hadn’t used a standardized message, but had composed his own; and although she wasn’t sure if it was cheesy or sweet, she liked it.

             
Another look at his profile reminded her that he was a data analyst with a master’s degree, and a regular attendee at a local Baptist church, who viewed his religion as a central part of his life. He was 5’11”, athletic, had gray-blue eyes and mousy-blond hair. His favorite things were authentic seafood, psychological movies, numbers and intelligent conversation.

             
So as not to agonize over a response, Angela decided to whack the ball back into his court. Without much hesitation, she typed a simple response:

“
I’m very interested
.

Angela
.
”

There was another message from Aiden:

“
I’m in a hurry to get to know you. Block your number if you like, but don’t block the start of something fantastic between us. Just call me.”

Angela’s chest struggled to contain her accelerated heartbeat. Overwhelming exhilaration filled her entire body. Why hadn’t she thought of that? She could hide behind a blocked number until she felt secure enough to release it.

After pulling up his previous message, Angela
pressed *67 on her telephone to block her number, then dialed Aiden’s number as shown, her thumb pausing over each button. She had the peculiar feeling of floating around an unfamiliar zone, in which she vacillated between taking a step forward and a step backwards.

Although conscious of the ringtone, she became alarmingly more consc
ious of the fact that she hadn’t prepared anything to say, if and when he answered the telephone.

             
“West Crompton Home for the Unloved, how may I help you?” The male voice was deep and authoritative. Angela, being preoccupied with the formality in his voice, didn’t catch what he said. She groped around her mind for something to say.

Flustered, she blurted
, “Sorry, wrong number!” and hung up. A few deep breaths helped to calm her down. Not wanting to misdial a second time, she took greater care reading the telephone number, pressing each number slowly and with added force, as if the force would change the outcome.

She held her breath as she listened to the
telephone ringing. It was picked up on the third ring.   “West Crompton Home for the Unloved, how may I help you?” It was the same deep, strong male voice. Angela hung up immediately. Certain that she had not misdialed the second time, she concluded that she had been the victim of a stupid joke.

Her body
, which not long ago was filled with exhilaration, was now shaking with a myriad of emotions, including anger and humiliation. With sweaty palms, she dialed Judith’s number.

“I’ve been pranked. He deliberately gave me the wrong number. I feel so stupid,” Angela poured out her emotions and harrowing words simultaneously.

“Slow down and back up.” Judith tried to calm her down so that she could get a clear account of the story.

The
update and heart-to-heart ran into two hours. Finally, Angela noted that it was late and they both had to rise early for work the next day. “I’ll definitely call you tomorrow, Jude,” she promised.

“Okay, and remember there is probably a perfectly good explanation for all
of this,” Judith reassured her.

“Yes, I think
the explanation is God is trying to tell me that this online dating lark is not what He had in mind for me.”

Angela’s brooding
, as she laid herself down to rest, overshadowed the unexplored possibilities that a friendship with Matt held. She wasn’t sure if she was really up to the inherent emotional demands of online dating. She didn’t know if she had the patience and stamina to endure the introductory stage, whereby she would likely correspond with a number of potential matches at the same time; the vetting stage, which involved the careful selection of the most appealing matches; and the disillusionment stage, where she would find out some truths and have to let the actors, liars and jokers go. All these hurdles stood between her and her soul mate if, indeed, he was to be found online.

             
Sleep did not come easy.

CHAPTER FOUR

T
he telephone rang at seven o’clock. Angela was already up and getting dressed. The unexpected ring of her telephone too early in the morning or too late at night, usually sent her straight into panic mode, with the anticipation of bad news. Why else would anyone be calling this early?

             
“Hello.”

             
“Hi, this is Aiden Jacobs. You tried to call me last night and I was goofing off, trying to be funny, but you hung up before I could talk to you. I tried calling you back, but your telephone was busy for hours.” Angela had no words. “I’m sorry, stupid, stupid joke,” Aiden continued. “Are you there?”

             
“I’m here.” Angela cleared her throat.

             
“I hope you don’t mind me calling; you didn’t block your number when you rang back the second time. Like I said, I’m sorry, and I hope you’ll allow me to make it up to you.”

             
Angela’s mind was blank. She knew that the rules and expectations of normal conversation dictated that she say something in response, but she was frozen. She didn’t want to allow herself to be enveloped in the excitement that she felt the previous night. She didn’t want to experience the emotional rollercoaster ride that the events of the previous day had delivered. Yet, she willed something, even tenuously intelligent, to come forth from within her to fill the awkward void; anything. Nothing. Her brain was playing catch up.

             
“I can tell you’re one of those selfish people who just love to hog the conversation, aren’t you?” he continued. She acknowledged his attempts to break the icy barrier that she had inadvertently structured between them.

             
“I’m sorry, you caught me by surprise.”

             
“How? By calling you this morning or by pretending that there really was a home for the unloved?”

             
“I didn’t actually hear what you said last night; I was taken by your voice because it sounded so official, so I thought I had dialed the wrong number. Then the second time, I thought you had intentionally given me the wrong number. You have no idea what I went through last night because of you!”

             
“Well, why don’t you let me take you to dinner tonight and you can tell me all about it.” Dinner with a complete stranger that she had just met online sounded like a ridiculous proposition. “Public place, lots of lights and people, somewhere close to a police station; I’m fine with whatever works for you,” he continued lithely.

             
“I’m not in the habit of having dinner with perfect strangers. Particularly those who think it’s funny to inflict misery on others with inane little pranks.”

             
Aiden laughed and explained that he had been trying to outgrow the fatuous behavior that had victimized her the night before, but the tenacious little boy inside of him just kept catching up with him and enslaving him. Angela giggled at this and the other droll examples of his idiolect that surfaced during their fifty minute conversation; a conversation that furtively stole her awareness of time.

             
“So, now that I am no longer a perfect stranger, now that you know that I am an
imperfect
stranger, how about that dinner tonight?” he asked. “I know you probably have to get off to work, so a quick ‘yes’ should do the trick.”

“Okay.” Angela was sure that she had given leave of her senses
when she replied, and she was, again, floating in that zone wherein her words and actions appeared to be involuntary and foreign to her.

             
“Think about where you want to go. I’ll call you tonight, and your wish will be my command.” His voice was filled with such promise.

             
“Okay. Bye.” As she replaced the handset, condemnation for making an utter fool of herself at the onset of the conversation washed over her. Now she had an immeasurable amount of ground to make up over dinner. Her reflection in the mirror seized her attention for a reflective moment. Dinner with an imperfect stranger. The whole idea defied her logic, but the spontaneity of it all excited her. She recalled Rachel’s motto when she first started online dating, before she met Robert: “If you want different results, you have to try different methods!” It was a motto that she was now adopting and making her own.

             
Although flustered upon her late arrival at the courthouse, Angela glided through the day with childlike anticipation; images of a magical evening bombarding her head. Most of her energy was expended in trying to establish the best place to eat. She surveyed just about everyone she could at the courthouse and the office, asking about classy places, romantic places, relaxing places, trendy places, and to anyone who asked the reason for her inquiries, she smiled enigmatically and replied, “Just wondering.”

             
A large quantity of her time went into mentally elaborating on what she already knew about Aiden. His voice, deep and manly, yet melodious, was one that she knew she liked. It sounded like it belonged to someone who wasn’t afraid to take control of situations or express feelings - a highly desirable combination. His profile picture on Christian Blend was only a head and shoulders shot. Subconsciously, she painted a picture of a firm muscular body to match his chiseled face and engaging voice. By the time she left work for the day, she was close to being besotted with him.

             
Although the hours crept along slowly while she worked, the time raced by as soon as she left the office and started on her way home to prepare for the evening. The traffic patterns were a duplication of the previous day. Every traffic light seemed to be against her, every driver appeared to be kind and considerate enough to yield to lines of traffic from side roads and to top it off, nimbus clouds began to creep across the horizon to obscure the sun.  She had hoped to observe the majestic sunset with Aiden, but the impending rain looked set to cancel her plans.

Sharon hadn’t been in the office
when Angela popped in at the end of the workday, which was nothing unusual. But when Angela received a call on her cellphone from Sharon on the way home, she felt uneasy; a feeling that was further compounded by Sharon’s tone. “Angela, how was your day?” Sharon was not the type to call for small talk.

“S
o-so, nothing notable to report.” Angela tried to give the impression of a quotidian routine, while struggling to hold back the screaming, “W
hat’s wrong? Why are you calling?”
thoughts
.

             
“Is everything okay with you?” was the next torturous question.

             
“Yes, why?”

             
“Well, I received a call today from a concerned party, telling me that you haven’t been yourself in the courtroom, neither yesterday nor today.”

             
“Who was that?” Angela wanted to know who the ‘concerned party’ was, and why they had chosen to call her boss instead of approaching her directly.

             
“That’s not important. What is important is if you have something going on that is going to cause you to be distracted, you need to let me know, so that we can work something out to ensure the ball isn’t dropped and everyone is taken care of.”

Angela hesitated, and took in a deep
breath to dispel her irritation. “Everything’s fine.”

             
“Okay, we’ll leave it at that then.” Sharon’s voice was neither raised nor threatening, but it didn’t need to be to convey the message. Angela had better get a grip of herself and stop fumbling and daydreaming in court!

             
She suspected the prosecutor was the snitch masquerading as a ‘concerned party’, since he knew Sharon quite well.  His cowardice failure to approach Angela first, with any concerns he had, would come as no surprise to Angela who, viewed him as a rather pompous man, devoid of all joy. Nonetheless, she had always made an effort to behave genially towards him.

             
Today, unlike yesterday, she arrived home without the viscosities of the day having much of an impact on her.  For right now, on her own time, she had plenty of planning and dreaming to do. She would not tell anyone about what she was about to do. Not Judith, not Julia, not anyone. She couldn’t risk being talked out of it. The only person who would fully understand her tussle to harness the elation that had risen up and overtaken her was Rachel, and she was on the other side of the world on her honeymoon in Australia.             

             
Angela turned on her laptop and walked away into her bedroom. Glancing in the mirror, she tugged gently at both sides of her hair, contemplating a variety of hairstyles. The short walk to her cramped closet brought about further deliberations – she had to decide what to wear.  Suitable attire was dependent upon the venue, and she still hadn’t decided on a restaurant.

             
Returning to the kitchen, she was aware of the fact that, due to nervous anticipation, she was not hungry, yet still, she plucked a handful of grapes from the fruit bowl and sat in front of her computer.

The Christian Blend website appeared o
n the screen quickly as one of her most visited sites. Angela had received a wink from Timrx1983 and three new messages. Had Judith been with her, she might have been persuaded to respond to Timrx1983 with yet another wink, to initiate a cycle of silliness. Despite her wisdom, there was no shortage of juvenile comic relief when Judith was around and in the mood to dish it up. Earlier in the year, Angela had sent out thank you cards to guests who had gifted her at her twenty fifth birthday party. Judith subsequently mailed her a card thanking her for the thank you card. When they next spoke, Judith questioned Angela as to why she had been so discourteous in not sending her a thank you card to say thank you for the thank you card she received in the mail. Angela let her know that she had neither the time nor the cost of a postage stamp to waste.

              One message was from Aiden with another apology and a promise to make the bad memory of the previous evening fade away. Another was from a gentleman who proudly displayed a top rack of bejeweled gold teeth, and two brawny arms coated in gaudy tattoos. His profile was lacking, to say the least, giving very sketchy details about himself, and answering most of the essay questions with, “
Ask me later
”. He called himself ‘Mr.fixit911’. Angela would decline to respond. The third message was from Matt in response to her previous reply. It read:

“Hi Pretty Lady,

I’m glad you’re interested.
Tell me a bit about yourself. I already know that you’re physically beautiful, but we all know that external beauty is deceitful and fleeting. I’m interested in your internal beauty. Feel free to ask me anything you want to know about me. I’m an open book. Looking forward to starting a new chapter with you.

Matt”

              The expanse of Angela’s grin extended from one side of her face to the other. Her response would be crucial, but what details would effectively communicate her inner beauty? She had never been one to blow her own trumpet. Like she had done the day before, she turned the spotlight back onto him:

“I’ll show you my inner beauty, if you show me yours first.”

             
She smiled to herself, and as she clicked ‘send’ she hoped that Matt would interpret her response as skillful rather than inept.

             
The instant she sent the message to Matt, the telephone rang. “So, where are we going?” It was that deep, masculine voice that she was already growing to love.

             
“Aiden, hi. I was thinking about it all day and I just couldn’t decide.” After exchanging details of their proximity to the downtown area of the city, Aiden came up with a solution.

             
“Well, I know that a certain person likes Italian food, and I know of an Italian restaurant downtown that specializes in authentic Italian cuisine, so let’s try it.”  Not only was Angela impressed by his decisiveness, but she was also moved by the fact that he had taken notice of her preference and was making a special effort to please her.

             
Having confirmed directions and agreed upon a time, Angela scurried to get ready. She kept on the fourth dress that she tried on – an electric blue fitted dress - and pinned her hair up in an elegant bun. Being careful not to put on too much make-up, she outlined her eyes, touched her cheeks with a minimal amount of blush and painted her lips with a natural color lipstick. With the exception of mascara and eyeliner, Angela did not wear make-up on a daily basis, but now, even though she didn’t want to overdo it, her application looked meager and she wished that she had practiced more often. If Aiden didn’t appreciate the way she looked with a minimal amount of make-up on, Matt surely would, or so she inferred from his message. It was empowering to have options. She slipped her feet into glittery silver stilettos and gave herself a nod of approval in the mirror.