Deviations: Submission (6 page)

That's what broke him. Not me, but his own expectations."

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Deviations: Submission

by Jodi Payne, Chris Owen

Brett nodded. "Noah's got some issues. Not many, but the couple he's got are pervasive." He picked up his beer again and took a swig before continuing. "His pride is one major one. His fears are another, and they're deep-seated."

Brett waved at the bartender for another beer. "What you really want to know is why we're not doing scenes together anymore, right?" He pulled a cigarette out of the pack on the bar in front of him and lit it, continuing without waiting for a response. "Right. Well, it's my fault, not his. The first year Noah and I worked together we did pretty well. He was a little tentative, I was a little green. At first, it didn't take much to push him and he didn't ask me for more. Then we got into a rhythm with each other and he started to test and push me more and more. So in one of our sessions I had promised him punishment for disobedience. I had bought a cage-by this time we were meeting almost exclusively at my place. He expressed some concern, told me he was afraid of it, asked me to keep an eye on him, that kind of thing. He seems anxious, but I had no idea...

"So I sent him to it, made him lock himself in and throw me the key ... I sat and did some work. I excused myself for a moment to use the restroom, told him where I was going and promised him I'd be right back, and then I left the room.

I couldn't hear him protesting once I'd left the room. I wasn't gone five minutes, but when I came back he had bruised himself bloody trying to get out. I have no idea what happened, why he freaked, and he would never tell me. When I grabbed the key and went to let him out he swore at me. He 47

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just wanted to leave. It didn't matter what I said, he wouldn't let me comfort him."

Brett shook his head and sipped his beer again. "I let him go. I didn't really have much choice, you know? Anyway, a few days later he called me. We met up here at the club and we talked a lot and he told me about this guy he'd been with for a while before me who he'd really trusted, but I guess this Dom got into drinking or something and betrayed him. We were just never the same after that. He would get angry if I didn't push him hard enough, and I was honestly afraid to go too far with him. I admit, I was way outside my comfort zone.

I never could win him over again.

"What I can tell you is he's a natural sub, he's loyal as anything, and he will never, ever lie to you. If anything, he can be too honest, tell you too much. I imagine that was his downfall with the first guy."

Tobias put down his glass carefully and told himself that he wasn't there to train a top or alienate Noah's last steady Dom. If Bradford was right, the two men were still friendly.

So he wouldn't call the man an idiot for leaving a sub in bondage, for not supervising him, for not doing his job. He wanted to, though, very badly.

He focused on his glass and tried to order his thoughts, squashing all the violent ones. God, he wanted a cigarette.

"So the guy before you is the one who cut Noah's shoulder?"

he asked, making a mental list of other questions. It was a neutral start.

Brett had let his gaze fall back to his beer and seemed to be in his own thoughts before Tobias finally spoke up. He 48

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glanced over at Tobias. "I don't work with knives yet," he said softly. "Look, I know what you're thinking and I've made my peace with Noah. I've learned from that mistake, so please, it's between him and me now, all right?" He must have sensed Tobias eyeballing his pack of cigarettes and slid them over in front of him.

Tobias didn't even bother fighting the urge, just took a cigarette and lit up. "All right," he said, blowing out a stream of smoke. He could tell by the way his lungs didn't even protest that he'd had one drink too many, and that it wouldn't be the last of the night. "All right. Not my business. Well, maybe it is. Christ." He inhaled again and sipped his scotch.

"So what are the main things? No cage, no sensory dep ... is he a pain slut?" Tobias was fairly certain, even in his current state, that he couldn't go through that again.

"God, no. He won't balk at the bullwhip, but he really gets off on a simple flogger or a crop. You can tie him in knots if you want to, but he's not into blinding pain. He'll take whatever you dish out, but you're not going to get better results if you hit him harder or with something more intimidating, you know what I mean? He's just not like that.

You'd do better just to keep him off guard, stay unpredictable. Seems like you figured that out already. Hm ...

the sensory thing, blindfolds are fine, gags, ear plugs, just not all at once, he'll freak."

Tobias nodded. "Makes sense. He reacted really well to gentle stimulation and praise-I held him and he calmed really well." He thought about that for a moment, staring at the back wall. "Actually I think I got more of a response out of 49

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him with one kiss than I did fucking his mouth." Tobias pondered that absently, swirling his drink and smoking steadily.

"You kissed him?" Brett lit up a cigarette as well. "Maybe I need to change my technique." He snorted. "He's very sensual, it doesn't surprise me. I've gotten him to beg by refusing to touch him at all. I've talked him into coming just standing behind him and talking in his ear." Brett sighed.

"Fuck, I miss him sometimes. He's complicated and demanding, but he'll be good to you."

Tobias closed his eyes against the image of talking Noah into an orgasm. Oh, dear Lord, he really had to go home to somewhere sane. The farm, that would help. "He earned the kiss," he said, stubbing out the cigarette. "I have no idea if I have what he wants, or if he'd know it if I do. In any event, it's up to him now." He drained his glass and waved the bartender over. "Have the desk call my car, please," he said, then he turned to Brett again. "Have you tried to work with him again?"

"No, we decided that we make better friends. He won't trust me; he wants to, but he can't. I don't blame him." Brett said, stubbing out his cigarette.

Speaking of the devil, Tobias thought, catching sight of Noah in the mirror.

"This is cozy," Noah said, stopping between them and looking them both in the eye purposefully. "Learning anything?" he asked Tobias. He looked pleasantly disheveled.

He'd left his shirt untucked and hadn't put his vest back on.

He had Tobias' pager number in his fingers.

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Deviations: Submission

by Jodi Payne, Chris Owen

"Yes, actually." Tobias stood up. "Thank you, Brett, for the talk and the cigarette." He turned to Noah and nodded, schooling his features as best he could, considering the Scotch. "And thank you, again. I had a wonderful birthday."

"Oh ho! I thought the birthday boy was supposed to get the spanking," Noah remarked, smirking. "Let me guess, twenty-nine again?"

Tobias inclined his head slightly. "Forty-one, whelp. And I thought it was the smart ass who got the spanking-oh, wait, it was." Behind him he heard Brett snicker and mutter something that sounded vaguely like "not hard enough, apparently".

Tobias gestured to the slip of paper with one hand, doing up his jacket with the other. "Use it if you like, Noah," he said seriously.

"Hey, don't let me break this up," Noah protested, "I was just leaving." He waved the pager number in front of Tobias and slipped it into his back pocket. "I need a shower. Some guy came in my hair." He winked, then sauntered a little stiffly out of the bar.

Tobias grinned a little. "It's a good look on him," he said to Brett. "I've really had too much to drink."

Brett snickered into his beer, and Nikki appeared at Tobias'

elbow. "Tobias, your car has arrived, sir," he said a bit nervously.

"Thank you, Nikki," he replied as gently as he could. The boy looked like he'd fly apart at anything resembling a less than polite response. "Think he'll call me?" he asked Brett.

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Deviations: Submission

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Brett shook his head and grinned. "There's no telling with him. But he made a joke at your expense just now; I'd say that's a positive sign."

"Ah, but is that a good thing?" Tobias asked rhetorically.

He waved and left the bar, stopped to say goodnight at the desk. He still didn't know the answer by the time he got home.

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Deviations: Submission

by Jodi Payne, Chris Owen

Chapter 5

Through sheer force of will and the distraction of his horses, Tobias put Noah and the club out of his mind for the weekend. He rode, had tea with Mrs. Miller, and worked in the garden with Peter, planning out rows of sweet corn and discussing whether they would be able to save his mother's asparagus patch after it had been neglected for so many years. In short, he thought nothing of subs, pagers, or taking care of humans.

Monday night, however, he found himself at the mall, trading in his old pager for a new one. They were smaller now, sleeker and more discreet. He was now wearing two and he needed them both to be reliable and easy to use, as one was for emergency calls and the other for ... well. Maybe just for the fashion statement, as he was strongly suspecting by Wednesday night when the thing had failed to even whisper a chirp at him.

He came home from the office where he'd been doing catch up paperwork with his partner, Deidre, and found a phone message from Phan.

The club's in an uproar, call me and tell me all about it.

Really. I want to hear this. You actually went into the bar in a less than perfect state and got drunk? You talked to Brett?

Jesus, call me.

He didn't. The last person he wanted to talk to was Phan, the last person he wanted to think about was Noah.

Thursday he began putting his head back in order. He didn't need the headaches of taking care of a new submissive.

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He didn't want to have to untrain any bad habits. He didn't need the stress of timing, of finding out what other horrors the man had endured. He really wasn't interested in taking Noah on.

So when his pager went off on Friday morning, he merely swore. "Deidre?" he asked with exaggerated politeness.

"Would you be a dear and turn that damn thing off? I'm a little tied up at the moment."

Deidre, bless her heart, stuck her tongue out at him and delicately felt her way around his waist to the pagers, taking both of them. "New toy, Tobias?" she asked absently.

His head snapped around to see that the chirping was coming from the newer of the two. Of course. The man would decide to call when Tobias had his arm up a cow's ass.

"What's it say?" he demanded abruptly. The cow protested by shifting a little and he swore again.

"Just a number," Deidre said calmly.

"Don't you dare lose it."

Deidre raised an eyebrow at him. "I sense good coffee talk. Phan?"

"No. God, help me here, would you?" Their conversation effectively ended by an angry and uncomfortable cow, it was almost forty-five minutes before Tobias could get time to call the number.

He walked to the truck while Deidre talked to the farmer, promising to be back in a few moments. The cell phone was charged but he had to wander a little before he got a decent signal, finally winding up just outside the barn again, away 54

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from the door, though. He dialed and leaned back, closing his eyes against the sun as the call connected and ringing began.

There was a click, and the voice on the other end of the phone was both familiar and not.

"Yeah. Dolan here."

Tobias noted the name in some part of his brain and waited a brief moment. "Tobias. I got your page at a bad time, I'm afraid."

"Oh, yes, hello, thank you for calling back." It sounded more like Noah this time, but judging by his tone he wasn't alone. "Uh. Listen, I thought maybe you'd wanna hang out tonight? Maybe meet at the bar?"

Nothing like the last minute, Tobias thought uncharitably.

Come up with a scene, play it out, clean up the aftermath-and the night before he had the farrier coming to the farm. But he knew that if he said no he'd never get another call. "We could," he answered cautiously. "I'll have to make it an early night, however; I have plans for tomorrow morning. Do you think we could wrap it up by eleven or so?"

"Oh, yeah, and hey, I'm up for anything you want. Sorry for the last minute call. I get off work at four. You want to grab some food?"

Tobias looked down at his jeans and boots and sniffed the air delicately. "I don't think I'll be back to town in time for that." Two more stops, grab something to eat at his place, shower four or five times; as a plan, it had merit. "I can be at the club by seven. Meet me in the bar, tell Bradford I want room six, and have iced water ready for me."

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"I'll be th ... hello? Did I just hear a cow? Or don't I want to know?" Noah chuckled.

Tobias grinned to himself. "You heard a cow. By the tone of her voice, I have to get back to work before she does herself any more damage. You were saying you'd be there?"

"I will, and I'll make the reservation. Dress code?"

"That hardly matters, as you'll be naked as soon as possible."

Noah laughed. "You got it. See you at seven."

Tobias disconnected and went to put the cell back in the truck, already working out possible scenarios based on what little he knew of Noah's tastes. The cow and Deidre both bellowed, however, and he had to put the matter from his mind.

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Deviations: Submission

by Jodi Payne, Chris Owen

Chapter 6

When he arrived at the club he was greeted with stunned surprise by everyone who saw him.