Determination (30 page)

Roxie swallowed. What would happen if she went through the archway with Sassy? She’d love to have someone like Sassy be a surrogate mother. She seemed loving, honest, and candid, a great combination, but how would Sassy be a mother to her in the next life? Roxie would be older than her next incarnation. That’d be too weird. Was this just a soul giving voice to her wishful thinking?

Her gut gave her the feeling that she was right. This was another test, this time a temptation.

“As much as I’d love to have you as a surrogate mother, I’m going to have to say no. I’m sorry.” She turned to leave.

“Please, Roxie. I want to be your mother.”

Those words cut right to her heart. The real Sassy or not, Roxie went over and hugged her. “Thank you. I really appreciate the gesture, but we have to go our separate ways now. I don’t want to but it’s necessary.” She let go and stepped back.

Eyes watering and glowing, Sassy’s face creased with sorrow. “Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m sorry. My grandmother did a great job of being my mother as well. I’m sure you’d be just as great. You’ll have to have kids in the next life.”

“But I want
you
as my daughter.”

What to say to that? The loving words made her heart wrench again. “Then consider me your adopted daughter. I’d gladly take on that role. And I’ve gotta go now, Sassy.” She made no move to leave.

Tears rolled down Sassy’s cheeks. “If you believe this is what you must do, then I’ll be a good mother and not get in your way. You’re all grown up and old enough to make informed decisions. I trust you, Roxie, and I love you. Good luck.” She planted a frozen kiss on Roxie’s forehead.

“Thank you,” Roxie said sorrowfully. They held each other’s gaze a moment before she left through the archway on the right. She grimaced when Sassy started crying aloud, but took the stairs one step at a time. Hopefully that hadn’t been the real Sassy, yet at the same time she wanted it to be. Sassy really would’ve made a great surrogate mother.

Darkness and silence fell over her as the archway sealed up. A new cluster of energy sprites emerged from the wall, lighting the way.

How many stairs did she have to climb? How many chambers did she have to cross? How many souls must she walk away from?

The spiraling stairs led to a third chamber and the energy sprites darted inside. Roxie tensed as she passed through the archway. No on awaited her inside, but one corner was cloaked in shadow and the sprites stayed away from it. Roxie eyed the darkness while holding her hilt as she crossed the chamber. This place made her feel like she was being watched.

Once she reached the center of the room, a figure stepped out of the shadows. It was Daio, covered in even more chains. His chin was plastered to coils of chains burying his neck.

He wore a desperate gaze with blue-glowing eyes. “Roxie!” He ran over and kneeled before her, clutching her skirt. “Kill me. Please.”

Roxie stared in openmouthed disbelief. She glanced at the archway leading farther up. Should she just ignore him and keep going? Probably. There was no way this could possibly be the real Daio. She turned for the stairs but Daio tugged on her skirt.

“Please kill me.”

“Why?” she asked, bewildered. This wasn’t the real Daio but she couldn’t help it. He looked and felt so real, and the pain in his voice gave her pause.

“Do it for Sassy and Aerigo. And for me.” He grabbed her hands, clenching them in his frozen, desperate grip. “I’m afraid of disappointing everyone. I don’t want to hurt anyone ever again, but I’m afraid Nexus’ll find a way to control me in death. Please destroy my soul, Rox.”

“But you’re not under Nexus’s control anymore. This is your opportunity for a second chance.”

“I can’t take it. I’ll disappoint everyone. Please, Rox.”

Roxie guided Daio to his feet and pulled him into a hug. “You won’t disappoint them. You didn’t disappoint me. You really are a good person. Sassy still loves you, and Aerigo’s happy to have you back as his little brother. And I don’t hate you.”

“I don’t deserve a second chance with Sass. What if we reincarnate together and I kill her again?”

Roxie took him by the chains around his shoulders. He looked at her with blue-glowing eyes glistening with tears. “You won’t.”

The glow in his eyes shifted from blue to yellow and his hands drifted to his neck. He made a choking sound.

“Daio?”

He clutched at his chains and stared vacantly at the ceiling as he struggled for air.

Roxie seized the chains but she couldn’t break them with her superhuman strength. “Daio, stop!” He sank to his knees and his face started turning blue. She tried wedging her hands between his neck and the chains, but they only coiled tighter around his larynx and he fell onto his back. She kneeled beside him, listening to him suffocate, at a loss for how to help him.

The glow faded from his eyes and his pale irises stared lifelessly at the ceiling.

“Daio?”

His form turned black and spectral, then darted towards the archway Roxie had entered through and vanished from sight. She got back to her feet and calmed herself with several deep breaths before exiting the chamber.

When the archway sealed up and darkness enveloped her, a wave of emotion washed over her and she stopped, bracing her hands against a wall and gasping for breath. Hopefully the real Daio didn’t feel the same as that specter had. He needed and deserved a second chance, despite all he’d done. Sassy honestly loved him and Aerigo was so happy to have him back as a friend and brother. Hopefully the real Daio was clinging to those truths and steadily freeing himself of all those chains.

Roxie steeled herself for the next round of winding stairs, straightened up, and started climbing. More sprites accompanied her to yet another empty chamber and she groaned inwardly as she stepped inside. How many more of these stupid chambers were there? She trudged up the steps, not sure how much more of this she could take.

The tip of her sword clanged against stone and that’s when she realized she still hadn’t sheathed it. She raised the business end and kept climbing. It was probably a waste of effort to put it away, just to have to draw it again. Roxie climbed the steps with mounting dread, fearing what she might meet next--or rather who.

As one side of the next archway came into view, Roxie’s steps faltered and she cringed. She didn’t want to deal with another soul, real or fake; she just wanted to reach Thanatos so she could finally confront Nexus and take him down one way or another. Her pace moved at a crawl as the entire archway came into view, and she grit her teeth as she looked inside yet another chamber.

It was empty.

Roxie relaxed her limbs and let out a sigh of relief. She sheathed her sword and walked across. No ghosts manifesting in front of her, no shadows, nothing of the likes; just one clear path with no obstacles.

She stopped halfway when a second arch appeared next to the first. She felt the color drain from her face as footsteps pattered closer and her heart felt like it was beating a hundred times for every step this ghost took.

A tall figure stepped into the room. Her eyes stung and throat constricted when she recognized Aerigo. This was beyond cruel. “No,” she whispered thickly. “No...” The strength left her legs as Aerigo smiled. She sank to her knees.

Aerigo rushed over and wrapped her in a frozen hug. “Don’t cry, Rox. I’m here.”

It couldn’t be the real Aerigo. She wanted it to be so bad but it would be better if it wasn’t. Their goodbye exchanged had been a final one. She fought back tears but they still fell of their own volition.

“Shh. Don’t cry.” He gently rocked her side-to-side. “I’ve come to take you with me.”

What?
She stared blankly over a strong shoulder at the archway, tears flowing freely. “What do you mean?”

Aerigo sat up and held her by the shoulders. “I’ve come to save you from facing Nexus. You don’t have to fight him anymore. Come with me instead.”

“You don’t mean that. You know I can’t.”

“You can and I do,” he said with a nod.

This couldn’t be the real Aerigo. He’d never say such a thing. “What about acting for the greater good?”

“I don’t care anymore. I’m tired of putting everyone and everything before me, before us.” He guided Roxie to her feet and held her close. “Come with me.”

Roxie could understand reaching a breaking point, but Aerigo had been prepared to kill her if she’d failed to control her Mana power while learning to draw it out. How could he want to throw all that away, ignore everyone’s plight, and think of just the two of them?

It’d bring immense relief to not have to anticipate confronting Nexus but she’d never be able to live with herself for letting so many people die.

“We’ll be like Daio and Sassy and reincarnate together.”

Roxie blinked and she wiped her eyes. “Don’t I have to die first?” She did her best to hide the pain of Daio’s encounter from her voice as it tried to well up. Her brain was struggling to keep up with the present.

“Of course. Come back with me and just stop eating. You’ll die peacefully. I want to be with you so bad, Rox.” He cupped her face and leaned in for a kiss.

Roxie put a hand on his chest, his powerful, sculpted chest. She wanted to bury her face in it and hide in his arms, but this couldn’t possibly be the real Aerigo. He wasn’t making any sense.

“What’s wrong?”

Looking at his chest, she said, “How can you expect me to behave so selfishly? How come you’re behaving so selfishly all the sudden?” She was fairly certain this wasn’t the real Aerigo but at the same time she wanted it to be so bad. She felt safest and the most at ease when with him, but right now she was so confused and unsure. Everyone she’d met inside the mountain had thrown her off kilter.

“I’ve spent so much of my life being selfless to the point where I’ve neglected my wants. It’s something I learned on my soul’s journey. A line has to be drawn somewhere.”

“Why now?”

“Why not?”

“I have to stop Nexus, remember?”

“Let the gods solve their own problems. I dedicated over three thousand years of my life doing what they asked of me. They can take it over from here.”

He was making less and less sense. “But what about what Nero said about Aigis stepping in where gods can’t?”

“Do you really want to spend all ten thousand years of your life being Baku’s slave? Look at where it got Nero with Olod.”

“Aerigo, you’re not acting like yourself.” He sounded perfectly logical but at the same time it didn’t line up with the Aerigo Roxie knew.

“Of course I am. I see everything so clearly now.” He cradled her in his frozen arms. “I’d die for you, Rox. Would you die for me, so we can be together?”

Roxie gazed up into his handsome blue eyes that looked upon her so lovingly, and Sekiro’s advise to keep moving if she met any other souls whispered in her head again.

Would Roxie die for Aerigo? Yes. But right now with all this responsibility on her shoulders? It was tempting, very tempting. She didn’t want to have to kill Nexus, didn’t want to fight in a kill-or-be-killed scenario, didn’t want to have to resort to murder for the sake of protecting others. She loved Aerigo so much. She wanted to be with him, not have him as her spirit guardian. In order to have that, she had to die, or rather commit suicide.

Aerigo cupped her cheek again. “Would you?”

Roxie held her hand over his and closed her eyes, relishing the feel of his hand on her face, cold as it was. On top of that, she wasn’t sure if this was the real Aerigo or not. Her gut said it wasn’t but this ghost standing before her was so aesthetically compelling. “How did you get past the wardens?”

“They don’t want you to die at Nexus’s hand either.”

She opened her eyes. “I thought you were certain I can defeat him. You were so convinced before we parted.”

“You have the potential, but I don’t want us to be apart anymore.”

And that’s all she needed to hear to be convinced that this was just a trial, and that she had to just listen to Sekiro and keep moving. With a heavy heart, she removed Aerigo’s frozen hand. “I have to go, now. I’m sorry.”

“Go where?”

“To Thanatos and to Nexus.” She stepped back and walked around him.

He caught her hand. “Please don’t. Please come with me. I don’t want you to go through the pain of fighting Nexus.”

She kept walking. “I have to. It’s for the greater good. You know deep down that I’m doing the right thing.” Her eyes blurred with tears. Fake Aerigo or real, this was tearing her apart. She wanted to find somewhere to hide and cry alone.

“No, you’re not. Come with me. I love you.” He tugged her towards the archway he’d entered.

Roxie pried her hand free and kept moving for the exit on the right. She wiped her eyes and sniffed. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

“Please don’t go, Rox. I love you so much.”

Bowing her head, she closed her eyes as she walked through the archway.

“Don’t you love me? Rox?”

Covering her ears, she took her first step up the stairs and heard Aerigo say, “No, Rox” in a thick voice. The archway sealed up, plunging her in darkness yet again. She took one more step and sank to her knees, overcome with grief. She pressed her forehead to a stair as she fought back tears, the stone cold against her burning skin.